"Welcome to Total. Drama. Agent. Island! I'm your host Chris McLean, and this season we got a whole new set of victims – I mean contestants," the host chuckled evilly. "They will be competing for a prize of one million dollars! And here they are now! First up, straight from the T.U.F.F. Agency in Petropolis, we got Dudley Puppy, Kitty Catswell, Keswick, and the tiny Chief!"

"I can't believe we're actually on Total Drama Island! This is so awesome!" Dudley ecstatically ran in front of the camera. "Hi Mom!"

Chris pushed him to the side, "Ahem! My camera! Anyways, also from Petropolis we got the baddies Verminious Snaptrap, the Chameleon, and Birdbrain!"

"Where?" Birdbrain's blind henchman, the Bat, asked.

"He's talking about us, you imbecile!" Birdbrain retorted.

"Who?" asked his other henchman, the owl.

"The host! Chris McRain!" Birdbrain gave an annoyed sigh, "Why did they have to come?"

" 'Cus it's in your contract, dude," answered the host. "And it's Chris McLean. Now, next up – they may not be agents, but it's close enough – we got Kim Possible and Ron Stoppable from Middleton! With them is Kim's friend, Monique, and her not-so-much-a-friend, Bonnie Rockwaller! And there's the villains Drakken, Shego, and Señor Senior, Jr."

"Ugh! I can't believe you signed me up for this stupid show!" Shego growled at Drakken.

"Oh, come on! Think about it! With one million dollars we could build all sorts of evil weapons! Think of the possibilities!" Drakken schemed.

"Uh, you really want a million dollars? It's called robbing a bank, genius!"

"Now, coming at you from Central Park Zoo," Chris continued. "We have the penguin team Skipper, Rico, Kowalski, and Private, with Marlene the Otter! And last but not least, all the way from the Tri-State area, there's Agent Perry the Platypus and the evil Dr. Doofensmirtz!

"Now campers, welcome to your new home for the next few weeks! Every day you will have a new challenge, after which the losing team will be voting a member off to be eliminated. Once there are only two members left, they will compete against each other in a massive ground-shattering season finale, and the winner will get the grand prize of one million dollars. In the meantime, all of you can reveal your deepest secrets to the audience via the Porter Potty confession cam. Any questions?"

"Well, yes, I-" Private started.

"Good!" Chris interrupted.

Confession Cam

Skipper: Yeah, like anyone's going to get me to tell you any secrets. Anything I know is highly classified. Even the fact that it's classified is highly classified! So I ain't talkin'! Capeesh?

Monique: Eww! Who puts a camera in a porter potty anyways!? Soooo not cool!

Kitty: I can't believe Dudley signed us all up to go on this show! I've seen enough of the other seasons to know that Chris is insane, the challenges are insane, and we are all going to be severely malnourished for the next few weeks!

Dudley: This show is awesome!

Bonnie: Yeah, I've seen the show. Heather was totally underappreciated. But I'm not worried. There's no way I'm losing to a bunch of smelly animals and lunatic wanna-be's. The one million dollars is mine.

Skipper: Highly classified!

"Now, for your first challenge, you will be racing from here to camp, taking you across the island, which, by the way, is packed with booby traps and some extra wild animals. First ten there will be the first team; second ten there will be the second team. Last one to cross, or not cross, the finish line will become the first contestant eliminated, and will be going home in the Boat of Losers. Now, Chef, if you will do the honors?"

The chef honked an air horn.

"Start!"

The contestants started their dash into the woods. Kim and Ron were in the lead, but Ron slipped into a bear trap…surrounded by bears. A little ways behind were Drakken and Shego.

"Okay, we have to be extremely careful around…" Drakken stopped when he heard a faint growl in the bushes. "Shego, what was that?"

"How should I know?"

"I think it's coming closer…"

Shego sighed. "You know what? In this competition, everyone is out for themselves. So, see ya!" she left Drakken and sprinted off into the forest.

"Shego!"

"Grrrrrr…"

Drakken spun behind to see a 10-foot-long Bengal Tiger prowling out of the bushes.

"Ahhhh!" Drakken ran away, screaming like a schoolgirl with the tiger chasing him.

"Hmmm…do you hear terrified screaming?" Dudley asked Kitty, who were both making their way across a river further off in the woods.

"I think so…"she shuddered. "But remember to focus. We don't know what kind of creatures are in these waters."

"Relax, I got it all under control."

"Alright, well let's just keep-"

"Ahhhh! There's something on me! Get it off! Get it off!" Dudley flailed his arms wildly and shrieked.

"Dudley! It's just a bunch of algae!"

"Ohhh…I see," Dudley stopped and picked up the green gunk that was on his shoulder. "Hmm…does this smell toxic to you?"

Before Kitty could answer, she slipped on a rock and fell into the water, where she was met by hungry eyes. "Ahhh! Crocodiles!"

"Hey, I'm pretty sure they're called alligators. Wait, what's the difference between them again? Are alligators the scary ones?"

"Dudley!" was all Kitty could make out while she was wrestling with the three alligators. Then, when she knocked out the last of them, she was attacked by a freshwater shark. "Ack! A little help, please?"

"But you still haven't answered my question! What's the difference between a crocodile and an alligator?"

Meanwhile, further behind in the race, Dr. Doofensmirtz trudged through the endless woods. "How big is this island?" he panted. He then came to a clearing, where Snaptrap was building a contraption out of sticks. "What are you doing?" he asked.

"Building something to fly over all these stupid trees. It's taking forever without having Larry to do all the hard work for me."

"Well, maybe I could help," the thought of not walking was sounding really good to Dr. D at the time. "You know, I've built a lot of –inators back home – well, of course then I wasn't building it out of sticks – hey, maybe I could do a stick-inator sometime! It could be – you know – all prickly and…sticky and stuff. But anyways, we're both evil scientists! We could do it!"

"Well…I suppose I could use some help. Okay!"

The two put together their gaunt flying contraption in a surprisingly little amount of time. Getting on, they cranked the thing up, making the propellers spin and the device ascend into the air.

"It's actually working!" Doofensmirtz elated as they flew over the tops of the trees, using hand cranks for power.

"Oi…I'm getting tired," Snaptrap released his crank to wipe the sweat off his brow, causing them to descend into the trees. "Oh no! Wait!" he frantically started hand-pedaling again to gain height, but an uppermost branch still hit the device, causing parts to fall off, which were, unfortunately for them, apparently necessary. "We're going down!" The contraption took a nosedive, bumping off tops of trees and flipping through the air until they crashed at the camp.

"We're alive!" Doofensmirtz rejoiced.

"Well, that's going to haunt my memory every time I ride an airplane," Snaptrap sat dazed, crank in hand.

Following the duo, the penguin commado team slipped deftly into the camp.

"Looks like we got our first team!" Chris announced. "Already here we got Shego, Kim, Ron, Dudley, Kitty, and Perry the Platypus. With Snaptrap, Doofensmirtz, Skipper, and Private, you all make team #1, the Rowdy Rodents! Kowalski and Rico, you will be the first members of Team Giddy Grasshoppers."

Confession Cam

Snaptrap: Really, Chris? The "Rowdy Rodents"? Really?

Kim: Wait, I have to be on the same team as Shego!? That is soooo the drama!"

Soon after, Monique, Bonnie, Keswick, and the Chief got to the camp. "That was the most ridiculous 'race' ever!" the Chief panted. "I fell into three trap doors, got attacked by a rattlesnake, and fell into a vat of plastic cups!"

"Feel ya, Chief," Monique agreed. "It's going to take me forever to pick all these thorns, burrs, fur, and silly string out of my hair!"

Confession Cam

Monique: Alright, I'm already starting to not like this show so much. No one messes with the hair!

Ron: Okay, that race was pretty tough, especially since I got caught in a bear trap… but hey! I'm sure the scar will heal, and at least there weren't any monkeys out there!

Chris: Note to self – put monkeys on mail order… *evil chuckle*

Meanwhile, way further back in the race, Birdbrain – with his henchman Zippy, plus the bat and the owl – were busy getting lost.

"Ugh, why didn't Chris McRain give us a map for these idiotic woods!? Birdbrain vented in frustration.

"Don't worry, all we need to do is keep going in a straight line," Zippy remained optimistic.

"No! That is the problem! We are not in a straight line! We have been going in circles for hours! See? See that tree? We have seen it before! That rock, too! We are never getting out of this forest!" Birdbrain ranted back.

"No, look! We haven't seen this before!" Zippy pointed out. Presently, the group had come upon a cliff overlooking the island. Not too far ahead they could see the camp, at the bottom of the cliff.

"Ha ha! This is perfect! We now know precisely where to go! Let's see, big tree here…river there… Great! Let's walk to the bottom of this cliff follow the landmarks!"

"But why don't you just fly down there?" Zippy questioned.

Confession Cam

Birdbrain: Oi…you see, my henchman here is of the opinion that all birds can fly. *sigh* She does not seem to comprehend that I am a blue-bottomed booby! I cannot fly! Penguins cannot fly, ostriches can't fly, chickens can't fly – well, I suppose they sort of can…for short distances anyways – wait, besides the point! Boobys can't fly either!

Birdbrain sighed. "That would be impossible."

"Oh, come on! You can fly if you believe."

"For the last time, I…! Wait a minute, by this point we might lose if we walk…and it would be quite humiliating to be the first one eliminated…okay, I will do it! It can't be so hard, and we're already breaking the fourth wall just by being on this show anyways, which must account for something…so why not! Here I go!" Birdbrain leaped with a running start off the edge of the cliff…and dropped straight down. Fortunately, or unfortunately, for him, he landed straight on a slanted ledge in the cliff that caused him to bounce off and be propelled forward, bouncing and tumbling off of tops of trees until he landed with a smack in the middle of the camp. "Ugh, did I win?" he mumbled, stars swirling around his head.

"And Birdbrain takes the spot as the last member of team Giddy Grasshoppers!" Chris announced.

"Wait…does that mean…?" Birdbrain lightened up.

"Yep, you don't take the Dock of Shame! (For now, that is…) Also on the team are the Chameleon, Marlene, and Drakken, which means that Senor Senior, Jr. is our first contestant going home! He was also the only one to never actually leave the starting line!"

Meanwhile, at the starting line, Junior was sitting primly on a rock adoring his reflection on a handheld mirror. The Chef stormed up to him, obviously annoyed.

"Would you just move already!?"

"But I am waiting for my private jet to pick me up."

One hour earlier…

"Hello, this is Senor Airlines requesting permission to fly in island airspace. Over."

Instead of the usual response, the pilot was shocked to see a mass of gunk otherwise known as "food" launched at his windshield in reply by an angry-looking chef with a catapult.

"Uh…pilot to copilot, are we good to totally get out of here?"

"Roger."

The jet zoomed off in a hurry.

Back to the present…

"Your plane ain't comin'! If you don't get up in five seconds, I'll…wait just a moment," the chef answered his intercom with Chris, telling him that Birdbrain got to camp. "Finally! Alright, pretty boy, it's the dock of Shame for you!" The chef grabbed him and threw him in the ocean.

"But…this is not a dock?"

"Swim there!"

Back at camp…

"Wait, do you mean I launched myself off a cliff for nothing!?" Birdbrain replied in shock to the news. "I could have taken all the time I needed, and still would have won because the other guy has not even moved a muscle! That was not fun, you know! I do not appreciate being tossed around as if this were a game of Angry Birds!"

"Apparently, it is. And that concludes today's challenge! Who will walk the Dock of Shame next? Find out next time on Total. Drama. Agent Island!

A/N: Yeah, so this is more of a TDI/ TUFF Puppy/ Kim Possible crossover... I just didn't want to label it an X-over, since that's totally not specific, if you now what I mean. So...I'm definitely open to comments and reviews, including challenge and cameo requests. Yes, some of the characters that from these shows that weren't contestants will be showing up at some point, even some that weren't from the shows... Anyways, sorry if your favorite character didn't get much cover-time; it's a little tough when there is still 21 to juggle around, but I'll assure you that they'll all get the spotlight at one point or another...more or less. Thanks for reading!