Spamano Omegle!

by MZS6

From quilt trips to burned pizzas, to watching football (soccer for all of you Americans ), to feverish tomato dreams: Follow these two nations in an unstable plot against boredom in this single shot of comedy! We never got to the yaoi, but there is Spain taking off Romano's clothes! Includes: background GerIta, near involvement of the Mafia, guilty!Roma, angry!Roma, sick!Roma.

Hello once again to another Fan fiction Special done by me: MZS6 Animarine!

I would like to personally thank every one here tonight, or today- doesn't matter- with this co-authored story of mine! Sadly I don't actually know the person who helped me out, and if such person is ever to come across the path of this lovely comedic piece, then that person should know that I place high importance on that person's opinion about the editing of grammar and wording that I have made to this piece.

I trust that my multiple skimming of this story has exposed any mistakes made by either of us (unless intentionally written) and hidden from the public a side-chat that might prove to be somewhat exposing of this stranger's identity (if coupled with their writing style, that is.) to people who might know that person since the person never expressed that I could reveal those things about them.

The ending line was also cut off from because this unknown co-author of mine suddenly disconnected, and the line left a new plot twist hanging.

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

You and the stranger both like Spamano.

Stranger: Ah! Hola Roma! How are you?

You: I'm okay...how are you?

Stranger: Eh? Could it be that you actually care?! Well in that case I'm doing fine! The tomatoes turned out nicely this year and my economy isn't as bad as usual~

You: I don't okay? I don't care at all.

You: forget it! just feed me already!

Stranger: Pero... Then why did you ask?

You: you are imagining things!

Stranger: Ah okay! I see Roma~ Fusososo~ so cute! What do you want then?

You: What do you want here in my house?

You: You came over so its your duty to tell me why!

Stranger: Ah well that, can't I just want to come visit you Roma? Por que I wanted to see you~

You: *blushing harder* mumble…mumble…

Stranger: Awww you look like un tomate Roma!

Stranger: You do, you do! If you had green hair I wouldn't be able to tell the difference~

You: No I don't! So don't be stupid!

Stranger: Eh? Pero it's so true!

Stranger: *hugs* mi Roma es el mas lindo del mundo!

You: As if! Now tell me the real reason why you came over!

You: *blushing even more* Let go of me!

You: Don't make me head butt you!

Stranger: Eh? What if that was the real reason? *Hugs tighter* no way!

You: I don't believe you!

You: no one would come over just to see me!

Stranger: Eh? Por que no Roma?

Stranger: You're fun to be around!

You: because, well… because they don't!

Stranger: I don't believe you~ you are~ Ita-chan thinks so too~

You: Even fratello needs a reason to come see me

Stranger: That's because you always kick him out without one silly!

Stranger: He makes them up!

Stranger: Roma? You okay?

You: *not blushing anymore*

Stranger: Roma?! Que pasa? Did I say something?!

You: Am I always such a bastard to everyone?

Stranger: Eh? What do you mean? I mean I guess you can be rude... Well... most of the time. But that doesn't make you a bad person!

Stranger: *hugs tighter and starts petting head* it's just you have trouble expressing yourself

Stranger: Ita-chan understands that y I understand that

You: Wait a second! *Pushes you away*

You: What do you think you are doing?

Stranger: *blinks* eh? Que pasa now? I was just hugging you, Sí?

You: I don't like being touched remember!?

Stranger: Pero you didn't seem to mind then.

You: That's not the point!

Stranger: *steps closer, reaching out* in fact you hugged me back Roma~ how about another?

You: *wipes away any left over tears*

You: *turns around and runs back inside the house, but leaved the door open*

Stranger: Roma? *Runs in after, making sure to close the door behind him* Roma? Dónde estas?

Stranger: *finds Roma under the stairs* Roma what are you doing there? It's dangerous, sí? Come out *holds out hand*

You: But you can come here, that is, if you want to...

Stranger: Roma... *goes under the stairs next to Roma, gently grabbing his face* tell me what's wrong.

You: *pouting slightly* Spain, you shouldn't bother with me.

Stranger: Eh? Where is this coming from Roma? *Cups his cheek*

You: *begins to cry form shame and guilt* you are too nice!

Stranger: Roma! Roma please don't cry! *starts frantically wiping away the tears* there, there, Roma what are you talking about! Please!

You: Yo-ou shhuld bbii aving fun wiitthh youur friends-

Stranger: Roma... *pulls into an embrace* Roma por favore don't say that. You are worth it. You are worth all the tomates in the world and more. I have fun with them, but I have more fun with you Roma.

You: -even thou-ugh theei arr basstarddss.

You: *lets out a whimper*

Stranger: Shh shh. Roma please. I like spending time with you. *Starts rocking them back and forth* you are my favorite persona to spend time with, really!

You: noo yuu doonnt! yuu thhii-nk yuu do buut you doont!

Stranger: Oh? And how do you know that?

You: Becauss yuu alwa-ys laugh moore with my brother, ann ii-im suu-ch a je-erk all the time

You: *begins to hold on to your shirt*

Stranger: Eh really? I think I laugh more with you Roma~ you just are usually too busy being cute to notice. I smile more with you too you know~ *gently rubs back*

You: *sobs some more. Mumble*

Stranger: Hm? What do you know Roma? Cause I can almost guarantee it's not true.

You: If yuu ilk like my frat-tel-o, i won-n't mind, kay? I waaant yu to bi hhaappi, ann i kn-now i caan't do-o that

Stranger: Hm? Well of course I like Ita-chan! He's so cute! But... *leans closer to face* I like you more Roma~ you do make me happy every second I spend with you. So don't be sad, por favore?

You: Why? Why wold you lik mmii? I'm awful, ann worthless.

Stranger: Roma! Shame on you! How could you bet think that of yourself?

You: I hit yu all de time.

Stranger: You're wonderful Roma, just like how boss raises you to be! Don't ever think you're anything less! I probably deserve it most of the time anyway, the hits.

You: and i call yuu names.

You: *calming down a little*

Stranger: Well Prussia says I can be an airhead sometimes.

You: and I never do anything for you, even though you are always doing something for me

You: and I'm always stealing your best tomatoes.

Stranger: But Roma I don't need you to do anything more than be yourself. Seeing you happy makes boss very happy, sí? I leave them out for a reason you know! If you don't steal them I'll give them to you anyway.

You: But I never, ever help you out!

Stranger: But nada Roma! You're wonderful, y perfect the way you are. And I never want to hear you think any less!

You: How could I not think less? What have I done to deserve you?

Stranger: You've been Roma, that's what! Pero I'm not really all that great. I'm sure you'll get something better for being so wonderful someday soon though!

You: What are you talking about strong? There is no one better then you. France, Prussia and Germany are PERVERTED ASSHOLES, fratello is well, FRATELLO, America has absolutely no taste, and England has it in the negatives.

Stranger: Ahahaha~ tell that to mi boss then *bright smile*

You: I don't have to, do I? You can read my fuming mind anyway? You hellion brained balloon. How could you always be so happy?

Stranger: Ah? Well it's easy really! *Shifts a bit, holding Roma's head to shoulder* see after mi empire fell, I realized a lot of things, experienced many hardships. So now, after all that, almost anything can seem like something worth being happy about

You: *fascinated, but hiding it*

Stranger: Then there's the fact ever since you were my underling you were the one who made me smile most.

Stranger: Maybe that's why I like cute things so much now? A strange attachment to you I guess~

You: I'm not that important crayon bear.

Stranger: Ah! But you are Roma! Why else would I spend all that money on you? I could have let turkey take you pero I couldn't~

You: Could but you couldn't? You sure are making sense today genius. *sign* I never said how much I was thankful for that, have I? So I guess I have to now *gulp*

Stranger: Ah it's fine! No thanks needed! It was worth it for you Roma!

You: NO THANKS FOR YOU THEN! *Huffs at being interrupted*

You: I think my pizza is burning.

Stranger: *sniffs the air* ah you're probably right! *Jumps up and hits his head* aiyiyi *rubs head* you should go get it...

You: We should! *Jumps up and hits head* ouch!

You: I'm okay! *Runs to the kitchen*

You: (hahaha! I wrote mine without seeing yours! haha!)

Stranger: (pft. Great minds think alike)

You: (I can't stop laughing now)

Stranger: *sighs and follows after him, chuckling softly* how's the pizza?

You: *looks down at the pizza, which is burned in some parts but still savable* All these tomatoes, ruined.

Stranger: Ah it's fine! I have more! They're in the car actually, Wait one second! *Runs outside and comes back, holding a basket of tomatoes* these arefor you. I figured you might need them.

You: I think that we can save a good part of this one, but, why would you bring me Pizzas? *Looks at the basket*Oh, you only brought tomatoes.

Stranger: *raises an eyebrow* Roma are you okay?

You: Si, I just thought for a second there that I would have to kick your behind for insulting my culinary skills.

You: *proceeds to violently cut off the burned parts from the rest of the pizza*

You: *with a very sharp, shinny knife*

Stranger: *gulps and steps back* ah I think I'll just wait in the living room...

You: Hey, come back here bastard! You can go cut the tomatoes!

Stranger: Ah I guess, but maybe you should do that with a less sharp knife and I can cut the burnt pizza? You slice tomates better than me~

You: *lifts up eyebrows* okay...

You: Is there something wrong with you?

Stranger: Ah no, nothing wrong~ *slips knife out of hand and walks towards burnt pizza, putting the tomatoes down on the counter* I just like how you slice them is all~

You: *completely calmed down now* okay then.

Stranger: *nods happily, humming a bit as he works* just be sure to use a slightly dulled knife Roma~

You: I am, but why would you care about what knife I use?

Stranger: ah no reason really~ no reason at all! *Smiles* just... Don't want you hurting yourself is all~

You: *holds on to left hand*

Stranger: Ah Roma! *Puts down knife and runs over* see! I told you! *Grabs hand gently and inspects it for a cut* where does it hurt?

You: *its not cut at all* I am more then capable of cutting up a tomato, bastard.

Stranger: Eh? Then why did you yell out? Roma I was really worried you know!

You: It's just, I'm not a bambino anymore, okay? You don't have to be so protective.

Stranger: But Roma, even if you are all grown up I still worry about you! To me, you're still my Roma! I care about you very much!

You: I grew up! I can take care of myself. So you shouldn't stress yourself out because of me.

Stranger: Ai, pero Roma, I can't help it! I always worry about you! No matter how old you get!

You: But it's not fair on you! Dammit! I'm trying to be nice, stupid! So forget about worrying over me.

Stranger: Eh? Roma how does this make it fair? If I can't openly worry about you I will just worry in secret and it'll get worse then ever!

You: Just forget it okay? The pizza is getting cold.

Stranger: Ah si, sí! *Returns to pizza* it's fine now; you can serve it and put the tomates on the pizza while I set the table, sí?

You: *almost done with the tomatoes* …well, I was wondering~

Stranger: *moves around the kitchen for plates and cups* Hm?

Stranger: Sí Roma? *Puts the plates down on the counter*

You: *begins to panic and blurts out* would you like to go fishing with me?

You: *brings the plate with tomatoes, and some cups*

Stranger: Hm? Why would you ask to go fishing all of a sudden Roma? Not that I mind pero… *moves to get a drink* wine or soda, Roma?

You: Lets have sangria, si? Maybe the Spanish-ness of it will cancel out yours.

Stranger: Ah alright~ *grabs some* Pero Roma I didn't know you liked this~

You: I don't! I just happen to randomly have it lying about my house because I hate it!

Stranger: Pero if you hate it so much why is there only half a bottle? *Smiles and brings over the half empty bottle*

You: The squirrels drank it!

Stranger: squirrels? *Laughs a bit* all right, what squirrels?

You: They are everywhere when you or anyone but myself aren't around.

Stranger: Uh huh. Whatever you say Roma~ *served the drinks* here or living room?

You: Living room, I want to watch the Euro cup game. (I know that the Euro cup is long done, but I had to add it~)

By the way Spain, isn't it your team playing against France today?

Stranger: Ah! That's right! Grabs the cups on one hand, the bottle in the other* you can get the pizzas sí? *Rushes to living room* (hehehe, Spain won against Italy twice)

You: *gets the pizzas with the tomatoes on top*

You: (hehe, you are a jerk, did I say that before?)

You: (Wait! Italy and Spain tied once!)

Stranger: (and the tie breaker? Come on. Say it~)

You: (No, on their first game it was a complete tie. I'm sure of it!)

You: So bastard, when we play again, don't think that I will go easy on you.

Stranger: *sits on the couch, putting the cups down* come on Roma! (Ah really? I came in halfway through: P I was in Punta Cana for the final game too)

You: (I was in a convention dressed up as Prussia)

Stranger: You went easy on me? I think I went a bit easy on you actually~ (ah really? Lucky~)

You: Haha! We made it on time!

You: (really, it was the first time that I wore the costume for a convention. Halloween doesn't count.)

You: (I chose to mention France vs. Spain for one reason: the players were hilariously touchy.)

Stranger: (no duh. It's France and Spain. What do you expect?)

You: (…at one point a Spanish player fell forward and hopped -in his hands and one leg- backwards just to keep a French player away from the ball)

You: hey Spain, here is your half of the pizza. *Hands over the huge slice* and yes, I went very easy on you.

Stranger: *takes the pizza* gracias Roma! Then that means next time you'll give your all, right?

Stranger: Don't think I'll go easy on you por que you're cute though~

You: *stricken with sudden realization* Wait, Spain you are here! But that means that you aren't there! *Points at the TV screen*

Stranger: Ah I called in sick~ I'm pretty sure my team will be fine on their own against France~ they look like they're having fun, no?

You: But what about moral support? And watching things up close? Even Germany went to see your game up close!

Stranger: Ah well *scratches head slightly* I wanted to see you more... Ah look! There's Ita-chan! *Germany and Italy show up on the kiss cam* (I had too!)

You: WHAT! THAT SMELLY POTATO STRONZO IS KISSING MY FRATELLO?

You: *pulls out shotgun and a cell phone*

Stranger: Ah Roma! What are you doing?! *Frantically grabs for the gun* put down the phone Roma...

You: *uses the phone* Ciao~ is it the boss? Yes I have a new victim for you~ He's blond, tall, and German.

Stranger: Roma! *Grabs the phone and throws it* Roma calm down por favore!

You: NO! THAT MUSCLE HEAD IS KISSING MY FRATELLO IN INTERNATIONAL TELEVISION!

You: I CAN'T CALM DOWN UNTIL HE IS EITHER DEAD OR A PROUD OWNER OF A RIDICULOUS MUSTACHE!

Stranger: Roma! It's fine! They're in love, sí? Germany won't hurt your brother!

You: MY FRATELLO IS INNOCENT AND STUPID, AND THAT GUY IS A PERVERT.

Stranger: Roma you and I both know your brother can be perverted when he wants to!

You: yeah well, he never wants to.

Stranger: They are cute together~ why can't you leave them be? Wait, how do you know that? Have you ever asked him?

You: *pouting* I don't like it

Stranger: Why not Roma~ *wraps and arm around him, still reaching for the gun* tell boss.

You: because I'm supposed to protect him, so when the potato-humping jerk hurts him, then I will have failed in my only duty as a older brother

Stranger: And if he never hurts him? Have a little trust in Germany, sí? And if he does hurt your brother not only can you put the mafia on him, I'll follow right behind you with mi axe, sí?

You: *looks into eyes, and signs*

You: *uses gun to shot the cell phone* but I'm still not happy

Stranger: *flinches, glad it wasn't him or someone else but feeling bad for the phone* ah... Okay Roma. Anything I can do to help that?

You: *blushes* Just eat you pizza its getting cold. *stuffs mouth with pizza*

Stranger: *sighs and nods* taking a bite of the pizza and smiling a bit* it's delicious Roma! I can't even taste the burnt parts!

You: *blushes a little more* hey, is that France groping one of your players?

Stranger: *glances over at the television* ah that's the guy who is filling in for me... Maybe France got confused? *Nonchalant*

You: *Whispering while hands twitch back to the gun* Lucky for him then.

Stranger: Hm? Why Roma? *Takes another bite of pizza, not noticing the twitching hands*

You: Did I say anything? I'm sorry! *smiles*

Stranger: *turns to look at Roma in surprise* Roma? Are you all right? You're acting weird? Did you catch a cold? *Puts a hand on his forehead* you apologized and you just smiled...

You: I'm fine Spain~ don't worry about silly old me~

Stranger: *leans closer* you sure? You look pretty warm now~

You: Its nothing! Just too much sangria! *puts away the full cup of sangria*

Stranger: Roma you haven't even touched your sangria. Now tell me what's wrong.

Stranger: Roma... *warning tone*

You: *completely red faced*

You: I mean it okay? Its nothing

Stranger: *sighs and pokes his cheek* it's just I worry about you Roma~ even when you look so cute with your face looking like un tomate *poke* you'll tell me eventually, sí? *poke, poke*

You: Don' be stupid Antonio. There is nothing to worry about. *continues to eat the pizza*

Stranger: Pero... *frowns but returns to his pizza anyway, silently promising to figure it out*

You: *finishes pizza and goes to quietly sipping on the sangria*

Stranger: *glances over and smiles* I thought you hated sangria Roma.

You: *not listening properly* huh?

Stranger: *shakes head* ah nada

Stranger: Si, Sí. Nothing important. About as important as what was wrong earlier probably~

You: oh, okay then...*crash! The cup of sangria falls to the floor- He's falling asleep*

Stranger: *startles, looking from the cup to Roma and back before glancing at his own cup he was about to drink out of and putting it down slowly* Roma? Is it siesta time already? *Looks to the clock, confused* better get him changed *picks up Romano, figuring he could clean the mess on the floor later and series him to his bedroom*

You: *shivering and whimpering* Noo, I'mm soorry I'm sorry! i won't do it again

Stranger: *looks to Romano in worry, placing him on the bed gently before trying to wake him up* Roma? Roma! Come on, it's just a dream, wake up! *shakes a bit*

You: *kicking out violently and crying now* no! stop!

Stranger: ROMA! *Straddles. Pins down Romano's wrists and he stays on top of him* ROMANO WAKE UP! It's only a dream! Wake up!

You: Please stop it! I'm sorry!

You: I won't eat you anymore! I promise, just leave us alone!

Stranger: *shakes him furiously before getting an idea and moving one hand to tug at the curl* Roma wake up!

You: *crying more now* BUYAH! I won't eat you or your tomato children!

Stranger: *stops, hand on Romano's curl and staring for a couple moments before bursting into laughter on top of the Italian*

You: *calming down but not by much* don't laugh you gigantic psycho Tomato! or I will send my squirrel army to give you a mustache!

Stranger: *begins laughing harder, tears literally streaming down his face as he falls backwards onto the bed*

You: *begins to shiver more from the lack of body heat* no! Don't eat my furry army you big red tomato highness! I will worship you, I swear!

Stranger: *too busy laughing to think about Romano being scared, rolling around on the bed clutching his stomach. He falls and hits his head but continues his laughter on the floor*

You: Prussia? Is that you? Why are you so tall, and scary and CHIGI! RUSSIA let go!

Stranger: *laughter dues down a bit to giggles as his curiosity becomes prominent and he listens in to Romano's sleep talking*

You: But I didn't!... Yes, I can prove it! ...It was the phone who called you! ...go away wintery vodka addict! …leave my Psycho tomatoes alone!

Stranger: *puts head in hands, watching Romano from the floor with a happy smile*

You: Don't worry about me. …Psycho tomato, I love you too, and all your red juiciness but I can't marry you. My heart belongs to someone else

Stranger: *fake gasps* Awww who? *really enjoying this soap opera type thing*

Stranger: *gets curious and gets up, walking over and placing his ear by the Italians mouth* que?

You: Yes I know, she is Russia's daughter but I cannot help it!

Stranger: *eyes widen before a new round of laughter begins, which he promptly chokes on at the thought of being in laws with Russia*

You: She is like the To-may-to to my To-mah-to! And as faithful as I am to you and your numberless children, I cannot tie myself so crudely. No offense you high red-ishness.

You: *burst out crying* WAAAHH! RUSSIA IS HERE! SAVE ME!

Stranger: *pales a bit as the thought grows and festers before feeling bad Romano actually had to see him* ah one second *leaves the room, coming back with a cup of water and promptly splashing Romano with it*

You: No Russia! I don't want to marry you! *Wakes up*

Stranger: Better? *Innocent expression and cup behind his back* Its only me Roma.

You: Why am I freezing?

Stranger: Ah~ well you were being attacked by tomates and combated with a squirrel army but then fell for one of the tomates but couldn't marry him porque you loves Russia's daughter ms sunflower *smile grows as he speaks*

You: *shakes head* don't be stupid crayon bear. I had an argument with the tomato queen because I ate too many of her children, so the squirrels protected me, somewhat. And she fell for me, not bad huh? I am a hunk and all but even I was surprised about that. But then Russia came out, and began to freeze me, so I charmed his daughter in revenge.

Stranger: *hiding the urge to laugh*

You: but then I fell for too, but then he found out and tried to freeze me again. *Serious throughout the whole story* and that's what happened…I didn't know his pipe could shoot snow beans,

Stranger: *can't hold back and bursts out laughing again, cup falling to the ground as he clutched his stomach*

You: *as you can tell, not quite awake yet*

You: *goes back to sleep*

Stranger: *slowly calms down before smiling fondly at Romano* ah Roma, you really are too cute! *Goes up the Italian, removing his shoes and socks*

You: *singing to the 'I am a Superstar' tune* I am a super pizza! With my big, big cheese and my big, big fire! I am a super pizza and you can't tell me why!

Stranger: *starts chuckling again, wishing he had a video camera as he starts the buttons of Romano's shirt*

Stranger: *hums quietly and finishes with the buttons* just give me a second Roma alright?

You: But I brought the tickets! I can't miss it

Stranger: *slips the shirt down his arms, lifting the limp body as he goes* for what Roma? *Highly amused*

You: I can't miss the game

Stranger: What game? *Gets the shirt off, putting it aside and moving to grab a t-shirt, moving back to Romano with it in hand*

You: I can't miss the game since I'm not French.

Stranger: *rolls his eyes and slips the short over Romano's head, pulling it down as sliding his arms through*

You: Not without the game

Stranger: *freezes on Romano's belt, listening intently*

Stranger: *keeps gaze on Romano as he gets back to the belt, sliding it off and starting on the button of his jeans* what game?

You: *on the pant's pocket there is a ticket for the French vs. Spain game*

You: I have to see Spain. I need to tell him that-

Stranger: *unzips pants and pulls them down, folding them as he asks *tell him what, Roma?*

You: …

Stranger: *sighs before smiling, putting the worn clothes in the hamper before putting Romano under the covers, tucking him in.

You: No sunflower~ I love you more~…No, I love you more~…you aren't allowed to 'push' aside my little sunflower, okay? ...I have connections, sir

You: Chigi! Gigantic plate of Pasta, I chose you! ...Gigantic plate of pasta! Use wrap! ...Good plate of pasta~…Now use Tomato sauce!

Stranger: *watches in amusement before wondering how deep asleep Romano was leaning down* Romano can you hear me?

You: *tomato man fainted from being drowned. Romano and the gigantic plate of pasta won the battle*

You: No, I can't tomato sir.

Stranger: *smiles a bit ruefully* ah I see, then it's fine for me to tell you something Sí? Something I've been keeping secret a while now.

You: Shut up! Just because you are king doesn't mean that you can boss me around! *mumbles* Stupid tomato kings and their numberless children. *sleeping glare*

Stranger: *chuckles a bit, leaning his arms on the bed and getting to his knees, resting his head on his arms* you really are too cute Roma~ maybe a bit too much than is healthy for boss.

You: Che palle?

Your conversational partner has disconnected.