Author's Note: I was seriously so effected by Sasha's death in the manga, and Mikasa's heartbreaking reaction, I decided to write this, a collection of moments between Mikasa and Sasha as friends we didn't get to see. Rest in Peace Sasha
Mikasa gazed at her reflection in the mirror. It was a really hot summer, and the nights were humid, with limited breeze. Her scarf was neatly folded on her bed, as she ran her hand through her long jet black hair.
It felt soft, and thick...similar to how her mother's felt. And looked. Mikasa swallowed hard, averting her eyes from her reflection then..as she got older, she resembled her deceased mother closer and closer. It was actually starting to become painful to look at herself.
She tried to avoid thinking about her parents...keep her mind focused on the task at hand. Be at Eren's side..prevent his death.
It was Carla's dying wish...Mikasa's final promise to the woman who could be her second mother. Eren saved Mikasa's life, and Carla gave Mikasa a home when she had nothing.
She would never break that promise...no matter what. She looked at herself in the mirror again. Eren had earlier suggested she cut her hair short, so that she could avoid getting grabbed in both training, and an actual battle.
She reached for a long pair of sharp scissors, and felt down her hair. She cut at around her shoulder length, a lot of hair falling to the floor.
Just as she was about to start making it even, the door opened. It was followed by a whine. "I'm starving...one piece of bread is not enough after all that running...", Sasha complained, as she entered the room the girls shared.
She blinked then. "Mikasa?! You're cutting your hair?", she asked, looking surprised. "Eren suggested I cut it...to be safer", replied Mikasa simply.
Sasha approached her roommate. She gave a kind smile then. "Mikasa, you don't have to do this yourself. It'll look better if another girl does it", she offered then.
Mikasa looked at her...the thought had never occurred. "Is that all right...?", she asked in a small voice. Sasha smiled again.
"Of course, hold still", Sasha began her work, making sure Mikasa's hair was even, and trimming her bangs.
"Your hair is so soft Mikasa! I'm jealous", admitted Sasha, as she brushed it. The girls had only recently started to get to know each other...Mikasa wasn't used to hanging out with another girl.
After all, her only two friends for a while were Eren and Armin. It was especially new and strange to be sharing a room with another girl.
"There we go, how's that?", asked Sasha, as she finished. Mikasa looked at herself in the mirror, it did look really good.
"It suits you!", Sasha exclaimed. Mikasa gave a faint smile. "What about you, Sasha? Shouldn't you cut your hair too?", she asked softly.
"Nah, I just keep mine in a ponytail", Sasha admitted, stretching. After the girls got dressed into sleepwear, Mikasa was laying down in bed, her back propped by pillows, while Sasha was laying on her stomach in the bed next to Mikasa's.
"Be honest Mikasa...why did you really cut your hair? Was it just because of training?", Sasha asked then, curiously.
Mikasa blinked, and she felt some color reach her cheeks. "Of course...why else...?", she asked, averting her gaze. Sasha grinned.
"Come on Mikasa...everyone here can see you're in love with Eren...you stick to him like glue!", Sasha teased then.
Mikasa suddenly felt her face grow hot, as it turned a deep red color. She tensed, choosing not to answer Sasha.
The redhead's eyes widened. "Ohhhhh my god! I have NEVER seen you blush that much before! You really like him!", she realized, as she sat up a bit.
Mikasa bit her lip, as she looked down. "It's more than that...I made a promise to his mother. And..I owe Eren my life..", she admitted quietly.
Sasha fell quiet, her eyes turning serious. Come to think of it, she didn't know much about Mikasa's past. Mikasa was very aloof with the girls, and rarely spoke, and never spoke of anything personal.
"Can I ask...what happened? I know you, Eren and Armin were there that day..when the titan broke through the wall..", Sasha asked softly.
Mikasa remained quiet for several seconds, her eyes seemed lost in her own thoughts. Sasha sweat dropped a bit.
"Ummm I mean...you don't have to...", she started nervously, not wanting to make the girl uncomfortable. But Sasha was curious...she especially recalled hearing Mikasa whimpering in her sleep quite a few nights.
Though it was quiet, and Sasha was never able to wake Mikasa during these nightmares. Or perhaps she did, but Mikasa pretended to remain asleep since she wanted to keep to herself. It was hard to tell.
"Eren saved my life...from kidnappers. After my parents...were killed", Mikasa suddenly spoke quietly, not looking at Sasha.
Sasha froze, her heart sinking. Sure, she figured something awful must have happened for Mikasa to be as quiet as she was...but hearing it was still shocking.
"I'm..so sorry", was all the redhead could say, but with a tone of deep sympathy. "The day the titans kicked through the walls...Eren's mother was killed. But..before, I made a promise to her I'd keep Eren safe...", Mikasa continued grimly.
"Oh...so then..Eren's mom took you in as her own?", Sasha figured. Mikasa gave a small nod. Sasha looked down softly.
"I lost my mother..when I was young too", she confessed. Mikasa looked at Sasha. "I was very young so I don't remember it...dad was never the same again", Sasha admitted.
"So...I do understand how you feel..at least sort of", she said. Mikasa looked down. "I'm sorry about your mother...its...a terrible thing to lose your parent...", she said.
Sasha's eyes softened, worried. She knew Mikasa had it worse...not only did she lose her parents..but Eren's mother as well.
She lost a family twice..no wonder she was so attached to Eren and even Armin. "You know..I know it may not feel like it yet, but...we're all a family now. Us trainees..we're living together, sleeping under the same roof...", she said then.
Mikasa looked at Sasha. "And I promise you this Mikasa, you won't lose your family again. We'll stick together, and stay safe", Sasha promised her.
Mikasa gave a sad smile. "I hope you're right Sasha...", she said. Sasha smiled. "Okay, enough heavy talk...so, you like Eren..who do you think I like?", asked Sasha.
Mikasa looked surprised by Sasha's question. She thought about it for a few seconds, gazing up at the ceiling.
"Connie Springer", she concluded then. Sasha gawked at her. "Huh?! What made you come up with him?!", she asked, though she was growing red.
"You're both idiots", Mikasa answered simply with a blank expression. Sasha blinked, she then couldn't help but laugh.
"You know...you're a lot more sassy than you give yourself credit for, Mikasa! If you came out of your shell, you'd be even more fun!", she pointed out.
"Oh, by the way...", she then reached under her covers, showing a bag of potatoes. "Want some? I managed to sneak them", she grinned.
Mikasa once again frowned. "Shadis will make you run across a mountain at this rate if he catches you", she warned.
"You won't tell, will you? Please, I'm starving!", Sasha pleaded then worriedly. Mikasa sighed. "I won't tell", she assured her roommate.
Sasha exhaled in relief. "You're an angel!", she began eating rather nosily. Mikasa gave a faint smile, as she got more comfortable in bed. "You're gonna get fat", she commented after Sasha started in on her third potato.
"Not with the way Shadis has me running! If anything I need these calories...what the heck Mikasa, you're working out NOW?!", Sasha cried then, seeing Mikasa sat doing situps in her bed.
"You're usually asleep by now, I always work out right before bed", Mikasa answered simply.
The Next Night
Sasha had been minding her own business, sitting at her table eating dinner. A fight had nearly broken out between Jean and Eren, the tension between those two was unbearable.
Mikasa had broke it up luckily, as she and Eren sat back down at the table. Just then, the door opened as Shadis peered in, glaring.
"Would someone please tell me what all that racket was about?", he growled, irritated. Everyone went dead silent. Mikasa, not wanting Eren to end up in trouble for this, abruptly raised her hand.
"Sasha Braus passed some gas, sir!", she answered him then, loud and clear for the entire hall to hear. Sasha released a yell of horror and embarrassment
"Why am I not surprised? Learn some damn self control", Shadis growled, as he exited. Sasha hurried over to Mikasa's table, grabbing her arm.
"MIKASA! Why on earth would you say that?! What did I ever do to you?!", she cried horrified, as both Mina and Connie struggled not to burst out laughing.
With a blank expression, Mikasa offered her share of bread to Sasha. Sasha's anger and embarrassment instantly vanished, and she began eating it happily.
"You'll really say anything to keep Eren out of trouble, won't you?", Sasha said, as she finished the bread. "I wasn't in any trouble!", Eren spoke up defensive.
"Eren, if you don't control your temper, you're going to risk a lot more than harsh drills", Mikasa scolded him firmly.
"But that big mouth started it, Mikasa!", Eren lowered his voice so Jean didn't hear. "I know, but you need to learn to walk away and be a bigger person", Mikasa replied simply.
Eren looked away, glaring. "Whatever, I'm not your kid or brother...just let me handle things", he growled.
"Eren", Mikasa spoke sharply then, causing him to slightly flinch. "If you want to have any chance with the scouts, you'll get hold of yourself. Understand?", she asked him firmly.
Armin and Sasha watched the tension between the two nervously. Eren sighed, giving in this time. "I get it..", he said, his voice softer.
Three Days Later
Training Grounds
The scouts had gone dead silent, and they all were no longer training, but rather watching. Watching as Mikasa and Annie faced each other.
There had been minor tension between both girls since training began, and a fight was expected to break out. "Uh oh..this is gonna be epic", Sasha commented, nervously.
"My dinner's on Mikasa! She'll wipe the floor with her!", Jean said, as Eren was frozen. Everyone held their breath, frozen as Mikasa took a step forward towards Annie.
Annie assumed her battle stance, glaring at Mikasa with an icy glare, while Mikasa kept her own cold glare fixed on Annie.
Sasha swallowed hard, as Connie also looked terrified. "Wait..maybe we should stop thi-", Armin started to suggest, when Mikasa suddenly lunged at Annie with a full force punch.
Annie swiftly dodged it, and kicked Mikasa's leg out. "Mikasa..!", Sasha cried, as Eren stood up, his heart sinking. Mikasa glared, as she then got right back up, this time she was faster, but Annie next managed to get Mikasa in a headlock.
"You only rely on brute force..that'll get you killed", Annie sneered. Mikasa glared, she then reached behind, and grabbed Annie by her hair, and actually flipped her up and over, slamming her to the ground.
"Holy shit!", Eren exclaimed. "YES!", Jean cheered. "All right, Mikasa!", Sasha added excitedly.
Annie glared dangerously, and suddenly leaped back up and the girls began exchanging punches, dodging as Mikasa stepped back several feet, managing to hit Annie, while Annie managed to get a strike on Mikasa.
As the crowd began cheering on, Shadis's voice boomed over them. "HEY!", he roared, causing the crowd to go dead silent.
Mikasa and Annie didn't even hear him, to lost in their own fight. Mikasa managed to grab Annie by her hands, and twisted her arms to her back, as she threw her, causing Annie's body to spin before hitting the ground.
"ACKERMAN! LEONHEART!", Shadis ran over, getting in between the two, pushing them each back with his hand.
Mikasa's hair was a mess and her cheek was bruised, as she panted, still glaring, while Annie's hair was also messy and out of its usual bun, bruises and cuts on her too.
"KNOCK IT OFF! THIS IS A TRAINING SESSION, NOT A STREET BRAWL!", Shadis roared, as both girls caught their breath.
He looked between his trainees, knowing their reputations. "Ackerman, 50 push ups now. Leonheart, you run laps for two days", he decided.
"What?! That's bullshit!", Bertolt muttered to Reiner. Mikasa had a much better reputation with Shadis than Annie, so he was going to go easier on her.
Later that night, Mikasa winced as she changed into her sleepwear. "Hey, you okay? Annie got a few good hits on you...", Sasha asked worriedly, as she changed too.
"Yeah..I'm okay", Mikasa assured, as she brushed her hair. Her face was bruised and she had some cuts on her shoulders, but that was nothing to her really.
"That was so badass, Mikasa! You would have won for sure if Shadis didn't step in", Sasha admitted.
Mikasa sat down in her bed. "She had it coming anyway...", she muttered. "I think I got it...Eren's been training with her a lot...are you jealous by any chance?", asked Sasha grinning.
Mikasa froze, she turned red. She chose not to answer. "Come on Mikasa, you can trust me! You really like Eren, don't you?", Sasha asked, smiling.
Mikasa averted her gaze, looking down. She pulled her scarf over her mouth. "All I want...is a peaceful life with Eren. That's all", she answered quietly.
Sasha's eyes softened, worried. The redhead was starting to understand why Mikasa was here...and how complicated the relationship really was.
The Day After Eren's Rescue Mission from The Armored and Colossal Titan
Mikasa was struggling hard to get comfortable in bed. She winced and even hissed in pain. The pain in her ribcage was all too real, and it was hardly bearable, even for her.
She shifted her body again, her back propped by pillows. When the titan crushed her ribs, it had left her nearly immobile, but riding on horseback made her injury ten times worse.
Now, she was confined to bed rest. Her breathing was off from the pain, and she could barely lay still without wincing.
The doctor had noted it was a miracle Mikasa didn't suffer a collapsed lung from the breakage, but nevertheless, she was ordered to strict bed rest for 6 weeks.
Like Mikasa could ever sit still for that long...she would go crazy before the third week. As she continued to struggle, she heard her door open.
"Mikasa..?", Sasha stepped in, a worried look on her face. Mikasa couldn't really answer, it hurt just to breathe so talking was a challenge too. "How are you feeling..?", asked Sasha anxiously, as she came over, sitting at her friend's bedside.
Mikasa gave a so-so gesture with her hand, before wincing. Sasha bit her lip, swallowing hard. "It was so..chaotic out there...I hadn't even realized you were injured. I heard a scream but...", she admitted.
"It was only when I saw Eren carrying you...I realized something was wrong", she added. "Were you hurt...?", asked Mikasa, her voice coming our hoarse from the pain.
Sasha shook her head. "No...Jean was knocked out, and Erwin lost his arm as you know...but the rest of us are okay", she replied softly.
Mikasa gave a weak nod, she turned her head to the side on her pillow, and went to sit up to drink some water.
"Mikasa, don't! Let me get it, you're hurt!", Sasha insisted urgently, knowing hos stubborn her friend could be.
Mikasa opened her mouth to protest...but she then gave in, knowing she had to rest to get better as fast as possible.
"Here...", Sasha helped Mikasa sit up carefully, as Mikasa sipped slowly. Sasha supported the back of Mikasa's head, her eyes softening.
"I never thought I'd see you like this...its a bit of a shock for everyone. You've always been so strong..", Sasha admitted quietly, as Mikasa finished her drink.
"Eren and Armin both said something similar...", she said weakly, as she lay back down, still struggling to get comfortable.
"You get some rest, okay? I'll stay here and watch over you", Sasha insisted. Mikasa frowned, knowing it was close to lunch time. Eren would be bringing Mikasa's lunch in shortly.
"Aren't you going to eat lunch?", asked Mikasa softly. "No..no, for once...that can wait! We're friends, I should watch over you!", Sasha said firmly.
Mikasa gave a faint smile, seeing Sasha's tortured expression over missing food, and she even heard the redhead's stomach growl quietly.
"Sasha. Go eat", Mikasa said then. "Thank you!", Sasha cried then, relieved as she got up quickly, she stopped before exiting. "Mikasa...", her tone turned serious as she looked back at her friend.
Mikasa blinked softly. "I'm...just glad you're going to be okay. When...I heard how serious your injury was, and what happened...well..I'm just glad you're alive. You're...one of my best friends, sometimes it's like we're sisters...", Sasha confessed.
Mikasa gave a small smile. "I'm glad you're not hurt Sasha", she said softly.
Four Years Later...
The girls dorm room was empty. It was also quiet, there was a hollow feeling to it. The more missions, the less time they actually got to spend in here.
The door opened, as Mikasa entered. She was a bit taller, her jet black hair was now even shorter. Pixie length, but she still wore her red scarf.
She was 19 years old now, an adult woman. "I'm back", she said, as she approached the wardrobe to start removing her armor.
When she was answered with silence, Mikasa blinked and looked toward her roommate's bed. "...Sasha?", she asked but then her heart dropped.
The bed was empty, and the room was quiet. Mikasa placed a hand over her forehead...she had been so used to Sasha being there..for that split moment...she forgot what happened.
Sasha was always there to greet Mikasa..and as the years went on, the closer they became. They were like sisters at that point.
It had only been 24 hours...since what happened. They had made it safely onto the airship, and just as there was a breath of relief...Gabi open fired at the group.
And she shot Sasha...just shot her. Even after Sasha had previously spared the girl's life out on the battlefield.
Mikasa couldn't get that image out of her mind...of Sasha laying there in a pool of her own blood, blood coming from her mouth, eyes and nose...as she lay there lifeless.
"Sasha has died.." Connie's words rung in Mikasa's ears. She remembered running in with Armin, not wanting to believe it...only to see the one cheerful redhead laying there, a cold lifeless corpse.
Mikasa had fallen to her knees and gripped her friend's shoulder, sobbing and screaming her name, even though she knew that would do no good.
The girl had passed on moments before...Mikasa hadn't felt this type of pain and remorse since Carla's death.
Now, as Mikasa stood in her and Sasha's dorm room...she felt tears flood down her face, as she sobbed, shaking badly.
She remembered Sasha's words..that they were like family, and that Mikasa would never lose her family again. And yet, here she was, suffering the same pain all over again.
It was more than she could bear, as she walked over to Sasha's empty bed. She sat down in it, and hugged the pillow, sobbing into it. She didn't even hear the door reopen, as Eren stepped in.
His eyes were remorseful, as his long brown hair covered most of his face. He approached Mikasa''s side, and very gently placed a hand over her shoulder. Mikasa reached for him, gripping onto his shirt, as Eren sat down, and held her in his arms.
He stroked her hair as Mikasa sobbing uncontrollably, clinging to him. The two didn't exchange words, Eren just silently comforted her, both of them still in a numb shock over this.
Sasha Braus died a solider, she was ultimately betrayed by the one who's life she spared. Things would never be the same without her.