Disclaimer: Nothing belongs to me! Toulouse-Lautrec belongs to himself,
"Your Song" belongs to Sir Elton John. And anything Moulin Rougeish belongs
to Moulin Rouge. So go ahead, sue me!
A/N: This is set at the time when Toulouse-Lautrec is on the roof after celebrating. If you still don't know what I'm talking 'bout, e-mail me or something. Hope you enjoy! Please read and review when you're done. I've made some changes and posted it again.(04-13-02)
Loveless Life
"How wonderful life is, now you're in the world."
I couldn't have been happier. The Bohemian Revolution had just begun. Everything was there: truth, beauty (I had never seen Montmartre this beautiful), freedom (I had also never felt so free in my life) and love. Well, other people might have had love in their life. But not me. That's the only thing that was missing. And to not have love in your life, well, then what's the point of living?
I would never think of ending my life. There still is a chance. I wish for love in every fiber of my being. That's what keeps me alive. Wishes. Hopes. And the fact that the Bohemian Revolution has begun! I've been waiting for this my whole life. Why leave now?
But the same question comes back: Who would want to love me? I look back at my childhood and wish I could go back and change time. That foolish, childish accident that left me with broken legs. They didn't grow after the accident. I'm deformed! No one would want to love me. They look at me like I'm a growth under their toenails. People think I can't do much because of my legs. Well, I can do as much as they can! Only my dear close friends treat me like a human being. Luckily for me, I have lots of friends in Montmartre.
I watch Christian and Satine "rehearse" and I see the love between them. I'm so jealous. I hate myself for being jealous at Christian. But it's so hard because I know I'll never find a love like he has. He's just so happy when he's around Satine. Like a child in a sweet shop. His eyes just light up. Satine is the same. They secretly smile at each other during practice. And then the Duke catches Satine's eye, and you see the Sparkling diamond. Not Satine. But as I watch them, it hurts to see them so... trapped. They have beauty, truth, love, but no freedom. I don't think there is anyone who has truth, beauty, freedom and love all at once.
You're going to be hurt sometime in your life.
And when I was hurt, it wasn't something I could fix overnight. It was permanent. My damn deformity ruined my life. I had a love. A love that would live forever. Or so I thought. She was with me through everything. The pain, the agony. She was by my side the whole time during my accident. But when she found out I was deformed, she left me forever. Now a loveless life is just something I'll have to get used to.
"But a life without love, that's terrible!" Satine said.
If she only knew.
And yet, I still believe that the greatest thing you'll ever learn is just to love and be loved in return.
A/N: This is set at the time when Toulouse-Lautrec is on the roof after celebrating. If you still don't know what I'm talking 'bout, e-mail me or something. Hope you enjoy! Please read and review when you're done. I've made some changes and posted it again.(04-13-02)
Loveless Life
"How wonderful life is, now you're in the world."
I couldn't have been happier. The Bohemian Revolution had just begun. Everything was there: truth, beauty (I had never seen Montmartre this beautiful), freedom (I had also never felt so free in my life) and love. Well, other people might have had love in their life. But not me. That's the only thing that was missing. And to not have love in your life, well, then what's the point of living?
I would never think of ending my life. There still is a chance. I wish for love in every fiber of my being. That's what keeps me alive. Wishes. Hopes. And the fact that the Bohemian Revolution has begun! I've been waiting for this my whole life. Why leave now?
But the same question comes back: Who would want to love me? I look back at my childhood and wish I could go back and change time. That foolish, childish accident that left me with broken legs. They didn't grow after the accident. I'm deformed! No one would want to love me. They look at me like I'm a growth under their toenails. People think I can't do much because of my legs. Well, I can do as much as they can! Only my dear close friends treat me like a human being. Luckily for me, I have lots of friends in Montmartre.
I watch Christian and Satine "rehearse" and I see the love between them. I'm so jealous. I hate myself for being jealous at Christian. But it's so hard because I know I'll never find a love like he has. He's just so happy when he's around Satine. Like a child in a sweet shop. His eyes just light up. Satine is the same. They secretly smile at each other during practice. And then the Duke catches Satine's eye, and you see the Sparkling diamond. Not Satine. But as I watch them, it hurts to see them so... trapped. They have beauty, truth, love, but no freedom. I don't think there is anyone who has truth, beauty, freedom and love all at once.
You're going to be hurt sometime in your life.
And when I was hurt, it wasn't something I could fix overnight. It was permanent. My damn deformity ruined my life. I had a love. A love that would live forever. Or so I thought. She was with me through everything. The pain, the agony. She was by my side the whole time during my accident. But when she found out I was deformed, she left me forever. Now a loveless life is just something I'll have to get used to.
"But a life without love, that's terrible!" Satine said.
If she only knew.
And yet, I still believe that the greatest thing you'll ever learn is just to love and be loved in return.