TITLE: I Feel
AUTHOR: Spwaddict
E-MAIL: brackish60518@yahoo.com
SUMMARY: Faith wishes she didn't care.
RATING: PG
SPOILERS: "Bad Girls" and "Consequences"
PAIRING: None
DISCLAIMER: Bet ya think I own it, dontcha? Bet ya think that I get all
the money from creating the wonder-ness that is 'Buffy The Vampire Slayer'.
Well then, you're obviously wrong. It's all Joss, people!
NOTES: Okay, I'm in that crazy cult that doesn't think Faith is really
evil, just misguided. I just love going into Faith's mind. Damn Eliza and
her good acting! Hope you saw the end of "Bad Girls" before you read this.
FEEDBACK: Like a vampire needs blood. That doesn't sound desperate, does
it?
I love.
I know you think I don't, but I do.
I feel.
I hurt.
I cry.
I used to cry. Now, I can't afford to. Can't afford to risk emotion on an enemy. A friend.
Sometimes I want to cry while I'm fighting, but I know I can't. He told me I was just another bitch when I cried. He told me he'd give me something to cry about.
Sometimes I want to cry while I'm with you, but I know I wont.
You don't think I care. I care too much. I wish I didn't care that I'm going to die. I was chosen to die. I wish I didn't care that when you look at me, all you see is red. When you touch my hand, all you feel is blood.
I feel.
And all I want is for it to go away. Life is easyer if I can't feel. It makes it easyer for you. Then you would know that there's no hope for me. Then you would be able to help them take me away.
You're good. I'm evil.
It's simple like that for you.
You feel. I don't.
It should be simple like that for me. It would all be so simple if I could just pull off the one thing I know I could never do. I could never stop feeling.
I wish I didn't care that he's dead. That I was the one that killed him.
I wish I didn't care that the blood wont wash out of my cloths. That I can't bare to throw them away.
I wish I didn't care that everytime I close my eyes he's staring back at me. That I'll never forget the look on his face when I dumped him in the water. When I made him dissapear.
I wish you didn't believe me when I said,
"I don't care."
I love.
I know you think I don't, but I do.
I feel.
I hurt.
I cry.
I used to cry. Now, I can't afford to. Can't afford to risk emotion on an enemy. A friend.
Sometimes I want to cry while I'm fighting, but I know I can't. He told me I was just another bitch when I cried. He told me he'd give me something to cry about.
Sometimes I want to cry while I'm with you, but I know I wont.
You don't think I care. I care too much. I wish I didn't care that I'm going to die. I was chosen to die. I wish I didn't care that when you look at me, all you see is red. When you touch my hand, all you feel is blood.
I feel.
And all I want is for it to go away. Life is easyer if I can't feel. It makes it easyer for you. Then you would know that there's no hope for me. Then you would be able to help them take me away.
You're good. I'm evil.
It's simple like that for you.
You feel. I don't.
It should be simple like that for me. It would all be so simple if I could just pull off the one thing I know I could never do. I could never stop feeling.
I wish I didn't care that he's dead. That I was the one that killed him.
I wish I didn't care that the blood wont wash out of my cloths. That I can't bare to throw them away.
I wish I didn't care that everytime I close my eyes he's staring back at me. That I'll never forget the look on his face when I dumped him in the water. When I made him dissapear.
I wish you didn't believe me when I said,
"I don't care."