Shirou stared at the sky, now a pink-ish orange tone, darkening slowly with the setting sun. The clouds drifted by, pink and puffy, also tinted with the last few rays of daylight. This sight, once so beautiful and uplifting, romantic in all of it's loveliness, now served as a dreaded reminder.

Looking to his side, Shirou thought he saw her there again, emerald eyes sparkling, loosened out of her stern demeanor by the sight before her. But her image quickly faded, and his loneliness took over again. The strong woman he'd loved would no longer be watching such things with him.

She'd left only yesterday, gone forever from his life. Perhaps, if another war….if he could have been chosen….No. His beloved got what she wanted, she'd gotten her wish. There'd be no way to summon her again. And to pull her from there, not when she'd become happy….

He looked back to his side, hoping to see her image again. It was there a moment, soft blonde bangs blowing in the breeze; A light blush creeping to her face; Those emerald eyes, sparkling in the sun…But then she disappeared.

This time he'd been tricked, for beside him stood Tohsaka, brown waves of hair unsettled slightly by the same breeze he'd seen blow over his love. Now, looking closer, he could see how his mind had mistaken her for his love. They shared that emerald shade, pure and clear. Tohsaka even bore a similar face to the one he'd come to love so much, and it almost pained him to look at her.

Now she frowned, resembling his stubborn beloved's face even more.

"Why are you staring at me like that?!"

He sighed at her angered voice, looking back at the dropping sun. In the corner of his eye he saw Tohsaka's face soften a bit, and felt bad for depressing her.

"Shirou…"

Her voice was calm now, if not a bit soothing. He turned back to her, reminded again of how painfully similar her face was to that of his lost one.

"Please come home…Sakura and Fujimura-sensei are worried… Even Ilya is beginning to worry, in her own way…" She paused, looking off to the side a moment, then looking him in the eye again, green eyes now wet with tears. "Shirou, I'm worried about you."

"And yet no one worries about her?"

"She's happy now…she…got her wish fulfilled…"

He sighed again, then turned, walking to the house, without bothering to wait for Tohsaka, though he heard her footsteps, so solemn, beside his own. It was clear they were going home, and neither said a word on the way.

No sooner had he opened the door than when Fuji-nee's fist collided with his chest, knocking him back, bumping Tohsaka slightly. He took this, as well asa slap from sakura that left a sting on the side of his cheek.

Ilya, surprisingly, did not strike him. In his ind she would've been the first, angry with him for making her wait. Instead, She was the first to embrace him, her eyes already wet with worry from the hours he'd been away. He only put a hand on her shoulder, and she looked at him a moment, sad, cheeks tear-striped. At the sight of his rather emotionless, if not depressed face, she only cryed harder, squeezing his torso.

At that, Fuji-nee hit him again, but Sakura only looked down, clearly ready to cry as well.

"How dare you make a young girl cry!"

She scolded him fiercely-and loudly- as usual, but everyone could sense the half heartedness of it. Seemingly as a confession of her own troubles, she also wrapped her arms around him, but still, he only stared down at them, thinking of his beloved, of what she'd do. Sakura, clearly unable to hold it any longer, hugged him on the opposite side of Fuji-nee, and that left Rin as the only one who stood alone. He could not see her, but knew that she was crying too, as her warm face pressed against his back, for he could fel the tears through his shirt. Her arms around his torso were the coldest; likely because she was the only one who stood on the outside of the doorframe.

He let them cry, for a long time. He stood there patiently, pretending a blonde head was among these women, her warm, strong arms wrapped firmly around him as well. Now, as tears began welling in his own eyes, he walked away from them, Rin, and Fuji-nee letting him go.

Ilya still clung to him for a few steps, Tohsaka held the back of his shirt a moment, before both released him.

His steps were heavy and slow along the hardwood flooring, and his door made a lazy thudding sound as he slid it shut.

His bed lay on the floor, next to a spare. Rather than laying in his own, he kneeled by the extra, put a hand on the soft blankets, folded so neatly. This bed was far softer and more comfortable than his own; he'd made sure she got the better one. With a deep sigh, he went done to the floor and rested his cheek on her soft comforter, taking in a deep breath and closing his eyes. The scent of her was mixed in among the folds of blanket, and her image was grought to his mind yet again.

His eye opened slowly after her face faded, and he stared at the pillow. In silence he remained that way, until something on the pillows surface caught his eye.

A strand of gold shimmered on the cotton fabric of her old pillow. Shirou raised this, holding it close between his forefinger and thumb, before decided without a doubt it was a lock of his love's hair. Now holding it more delicately, he walked over to his desk, opening a small chest that had her picture in it.

It tugged at his heart to see a real picture of her, and image that wouldn't fad, but only taut him with the sight of her. A tear slid down his cheek, but he left the picture in the chest, placing the golden blonde strand in above it. Another tear raced down his face, and dripped off his chin as he closed the small box, landing on a small sapphire, surrounded by silver. It turned emerald beneath his tear, or so he thought. A trick on his eyes; it was clearly a sapphire stone.

He felt odd jst leaving it like that. Slowly, he got a lighter, and lit a fresh, pure-white candle on the corner of the nightstand, sitting crosslegged and staring intently into the flame. It flickered as any other candle would, sending shadows across his room sporatically. Resting his chin on now-crossed arms, he stared intently at the small chest, watching the flames dance across its surface.

The door behind him slid open, and he took a guess at who stood there, in his mind deciding who it would be.

Ilya was too young to understand. She might worry for him, but the smaller girl was to immature to realize what was going on. Fuji-nee, his beloved-though adoptive-older sister was never quite serious or understanding of him. She was protective, but would not know what to do now, or how to help him. He still adored her, though they weren't related by blood. Sakura, so sweet and kind, always wanting nothing more than to help him. She was far too timid to approach him now, particularly after everything that had happened downstairs. Tohsaka, she'd be frowning angrily, annoyed at himn for being so weak, which –now that their friendship was public- would reflect upon her own appearance.

Oddly enough, it was the latter who leaned over his shoulder, dark brown hair dripping forward as well. Her cheek was close to his, skin far fairer, by contrast making his appear tan.

"We all miss her, Shirou. It's ok."

It was odd to hear Tohsaka's normally stern voice so soft, so comforting. He wanted to let her words soothe her, but that wasn't fair to his love. He could not just frolick about happily with her gone. Even if she left to become happy, it would be dishonoring to pretend like she'd never been there. He remained solemnly silent in though.

Tohsaka went down to her knees now, scooting beside him, to stare intently at him. His own gaze was still on the flickering candle, but he could see her concerned eyes in the corner of his vision.

"Come eat, Shirou."

He made no move, nor reply.

"You know…She'd be angry if she knew you were doing this.l"

He felt a pang, remembering her lectures, all of her stern words. She'd always forced him to rest, to keep his body in good condition. But he hadn't eaten since the day before, previous to her departure. Something told him he couldn't, not without her downing three times the amount beside him.

Contradictory to his thoughts, He rose, somewhat robotically, and went for the door. Tohsaka, no doubt smiling, followed quickly behind him

She sat behind him at the dinner table, across from Ilya. Sakura passed out the rice, and they all thanked her for cooking. Dinner went a bit slower than usual, everyone still solemn that there was a blonde to compete with for food. Fuji-Nee, who usually inhaled food, ate slowly herself, and for the first time a regular amount of food. Besides shirour all of them did. He hardly touched his rice before leaving.

His knees smacked the table as he rose, and everything on the table began clattering, causing them all to flinch. His action seemed to have killed all appetites, because they got up with him, silently putting dishes in the sink, Fuji-nee and Sakura heading home. It seemed to be Ilya's turn to clean up, and she did, as Rin followed Shirou back into his room, for reasons unknown to him.

Well, I hope you all enjoyed chapter 1!Constructive Crits are loved, I always want to improve!If you REALLY hated it, flame me. I wanna know if it sucks THAT badly ; [please say WHY you hate it, thanksComments in general are loved to, obviously ;Comments motivate me to write. Which is why I ask for them, hehe ;

Rachel♥