A/N: I can't remember anymore how I came up with this idea, but managed to write it down anyway, and here it is. I've never written stuff like this, but I hope you like it and I hope the flashback scene isn't too graphic. At first it was only supposed to be a mention, but I somehow came up with that.

I couldn't really think of a better title, so I came up with this one, it's from a song called Camisado by Panic! At The Disco.

Enjoi!

"Action!"

"Hey! I am talking to you! " Chris stormed in the locker room, looking at Max an angry look on his face. The other boy didn't turn to look at him as he opened his mouth.

"The girls' locker room is next door."

"What is your problem?" Chris walked towards Max, who turned to look at him.

"Excuse me?"

"What are you so scared of?"

"Besides you sneaking in here to peek at my junk?"

"Oh yeah, every straight guy's nightmare, that all us gays are secretly out to molest and convert you", Chris said sarcastically, throwing his hands in the air. "Well guess what, Hamhock? You're not my type!"

"That right?" Max asked and Chris nodded slightly, still an annoyed look on his face.

"Yeah. I don't dig on chubby boys who sweat too much and are gonna be bald by the time they're thirty!" he said, talking a lot faster than normally.

"Do not push me, homo!" Max said, raising his fist. Chris glanced at it.

"You gonna hit me? Do it", he said.

"Don't push me!" Max shouted, slamming the locker door shut angrily.

"Hit me cause it's not gonna change who I am. You can't punch the gay out of me any more than I can punch the ignorance out of you."

"Get out of my face!" Max screamed, not having any effect on Chris, who kept talking angrily.

"You are nothing but a scared little boy who can't handle how extraordinarily ordinary you are!" he said, pointing Max with his finger accusingly and placed a shocked look on his face when Max grabbed his face with his both hands and placed his lips on his demandingly. Soon the boy pulled away and looked at Chris, who had placed his hand on his mouth, eyes widened, before reached forward in another attempt to kiss him, only to be pushed away by Chris. Chris' heart was beating faster than normally, even though he knew it was just Max he was kissing and he was just acting and it was fine. Everything was fine.

For a moment Max looked like he was gonna start crying or hit him, but he settled on hitting the lockers and making a frustrated sound before storming out, leaving still shocked Chris standing in the locker room.

"Cut!"

"Was that okay?" Chris was starting to calm down and came back to reality as Ryan Murphy walked towards him

"Yep, you looked totally shocked", the man grinned. "So, how was he?"

"You can't ask that!" Max protested as he walked back to Chris and Ryan but then turned to Chris.

"How was I?"

"I'm like Kurt in a way that it was my second kiss, too, so I don't have many people to compare to, but you were good", Chris grinned.

"Even though you don't have much practice and just so you know, I'm totally straight, but you were pretty good too", Max smirked and Chris laughed.

"Thanks."

"Take a break, guys, your next scene will take place in about two hours", Ryan said and the boys nodded.

"Sure."

"Wanna go eat something?" Max asked but Chris shooked his head.

"Actually, I already made plans with Darren. Sorry", he shrugged apologetically.

"It's okay. Actually, I think I'm gonna ask Cory, he's having a break, too. I'll see you later", Max smiled and waved as he walked away.

"See ya." Chris also headed out, pulling his phone out of his pocket and sent a text to Darren.

"Finished shooting, meet me at the cafeteria in 5 minutes - C"

He headed to the said cafeteria, Darren wasn't there yet. He ordered a coffee and a sandwich and sat on one of the free tables. Soon he saw Darren appearing and waved at him, the other waved back, smiling.

After ordering also a coffee and a sandwich, Darren sat opposite to Chris.

"Hi", he said and took a bite of his sandwich.

"Hey", Chris smiled, drinking his coffee.

"How was the shooting?"

"It was okay", Chris shrugged. "We managed to shoot it in only one take."

"That's great", Darren smiled. "I always knew you were good actor."

Chris suddenly felt a familiar bump in his chest but managed to force a grin.

"Thanks, Darren. You too."

They ate their lunch peacefully, talking about work and whatever came to mind. Pretty much the only distraction to their peace was when Chris laughed so hard he nearly choke on his sandwich, but survived.

A week later they were filming the next episode, The Substitute. Everyone was thrilled about having Gwyneth Paltrow guest-starring. She was really good in her scenes and at breaks she was really nice and funny and everyone loved her.

Chris, on his part, was having a great time with Darren. They'd only known each other for less than two weeks, but they were already like best friends. They spent pretty much all their free time together, geeking and talking and laughing and Chris loved it, he'd never had a friend like Darren before. They could talk about anything or nothing and Chris always felt comfortable around him. One night even so comfortable that he fell asleep next to him when they, both extremely tired, were watching Rent for the hundredth time. Chris had been actually surprised when he found out Darren loved musicals. He knew he liked them at least a little, he was very familiar with his Starkid Productions, but he'd never thought that Darren would actually be a fan of the classic, or some not so classic, musicals Chris loved.

Anyway, Chris could easily say he loved Darren. No, he wasn't in love with him, though he did realize how supermegafoxyawesomehot Darren was, and yes, sometimes he dreamed about things he could do to him, but Darren was straight and even though Chris was slightly attracted to him, he never let himself fall in love with him. He loved him as his friend and wanted to keep it that way.

"Chris, it's your turn", he heard a shout and was shaken out of his thoughts.

"Oh, sorry", he grinned sheepishly and walked in front of the camera.

"Action!"

The beginning of the scene went well, with Amber shoving him the tots she had sneaked in and Chris telling him she shouldn't substitute love for food. Amber then said she'd go find that Antony kid Chris had set her up on a date with as Kurt, and after she left he smiled and turned to look at the picture of Darren hanging on his locker door.

And then Max came on grabbed Chris' shoulder. He turned to look at him, annoyed.

"Question for you. You tell anyone else what happened? How you-you kissed me?" he said the last words a bit insecurely and glanced around as if to make sure no one heard. Chris frowned.

"You kissed me, Karofsky", he corrected. "And I understand how hard this is for you to deal with, so no, I haven't told anyone."

"Good. You keep it that way. 'Cause if you do, I'm gonna kill you", he swore before leaving a shivering Chris behind him.

"If you tell anyone, you're dead. Got that, fag?"

"Cut!"

Chris forced a smile on his face, even though he pretty much felt like crying. All these scenes with Max brought back memories, things he desperately wanted to forget, and he hated it.

"Okay guys, take a break", Ryan said and patted Chris on the shoulder when passing him. "Good job, kid."

Chris was unable to say anything, he just nodded while biting his lip not to burst out crying.

He had the happenings playing in his head over and over again and he just wanted to forget and suddenly he felt sick.

He ignored the people calling his name and stormed off. He already tasted vomit in his mouth and he ran to the nearest bathroom. He headed to the closest free toilet just in time before emptying the contents of his stomach.

After he was done he couldn't help but burst out crying. He sat next to the toiler, dragged his knees to his chest and sobbed.

He felt awful and sick and dirty and he just wanted to forget. It had happened ages ago, why couldn't he just block it out of his mind?

"Chris?" He heard someone calling him and he did the best he could to stop crying.

Suddenly a familiar face appeared to the doorway of the toilet, whose door he had forgotten to close.

"Go away, Darren", he sobbed.

"Chris, are you okay?" Darren asked worriedly.

"I'm fine", Chris muttered. "Just go."

"You don't seem fine."

"I just felt a little sick, okay?" Chris finally looked up at Darren. "I'm fine now." Darren shook his head and sat next to Chris.

"What made you suddenly so upset?" he asked, trying to look at Chris in the eyes but the other kept his gaze in the ground.

"Nothing. Maybe I just ate something bad or something", he muttered.

"Chris", Darren said quietly and placed his hand on Chris' shoulder. A part of Chris wanted to shake it off, but he didn't. "You know you can tell me anything, right?"

"I just want to forget", Chris whispered, tears filling his eyes again.

"Forget what?" Darren asked and frowned in concern.

"When I was 17, I… I…" Chris started but couldn't finish his sentence.

"You what?"

"You know what? It's nothing, nevermind", Chris said and wiped away his tears on his sleeve. He stood up and headed to the sinks to wash his hands, followed by Darren.

"Tell me. When you were 17, you what?" Darren asked softly, wanting to know but not wanting to pressure Chris.

"Really, it's nothing. Just leave me alone, Darren." Chris dried his hands and started heading to the door but Darren stopped him.

"Please. Tell me what happened", Darren pleaded. Chris saw the deep concern in his eyes and gave up, sighing. He sat on the floor, leaning against the wall. Darren sat next to him.

"When I was 17, I… There was this guy, who… He… He raped me." Chris stared at the ground, eyes filled with tears. He couldn't look Darren in eye anymore 'cause he felt so ashamed. The other boy's eyes widened in shock.

"I... I'm so sorry", Darren whispered and pulled Chris into a tight hug.

Chris burst out crying as he hugged Darren back.

"I'm sorry! I just… I couldn't stop him, I tried, I swear! But he was so much bigger and stronger and I just couldn't stop him!" he sobbed. Darren tightened his hold on him.

"It's okay, it wasn't your fault, shh, it's gonna be okay."

For a while they just sat there, holding each other, Chris sobbing and Darren soothing him, promising it would be okay.

Eventually Chris stopped crying but didn't let go of Darren.

"Please don't tell anyone, you're the only one who knows", he whispered.

"I won't", Darren promised. "But I have to ask you something." Chris glanced up at Darren but lowered his gaze quickly. "Do you remember who it was?"

"No. I kinda wish I did, but I have no idea. It was someone from my school I think, but I can't remember who. They all looked kinda the same."

Darren nodded.

"Do you wanna talk about it? About what actually happened?" he asked carefully.

Chris closed his eyes. Did he? Ever since he'd met Darren he'd felt like he could trust him, and he knew he could, but he wasn't sure if he was ready to go to specifics. He could always say he didn't remember it that well, but he knew Darren wouldn't believe him. He'd sort of seemed to gotten this ability to sense when Chris lied.

And Chris did remember what happened, way too clearly…

Chris had just finished his late practice of a play they were doing at school. He'd been the only to stay that late, the other pretty much figured they didn't need that much practice, but Chris had always been a perfectionist. He knew he was good, but he still thought there was always room for improvement.

He walked out of the doors and headed towards the bus stop. He didn't have an own car yet, but luckily buses weren't very expensive and went pretty often, so he had really no problem using them.

He didn't get far before he heard a shout behind him.

"Where you think you're going, fag?"

Chris kept walking, speeded up a little, trying to ignore the guy calling for him. It didn't help, soon he felt a hand grabbing his shoulder, turning him around, and another hitting his stomach. He yelped and bended over, holding his stomach with his other hand.

"Leave me alone", he snarled through his gritted teeth and received a kick in his groin, making him drop his bag and fall on the ground in pain.

"What was that? You talking to me?" the guy said. Chris closed his eyes, he didn't even know this guy, why was he doing this to him? He realized it must've been someone from his school, but it didn't really help him.

"I have a little lesson to teach you", the guys said, grabbing Chris' arm and dragging him away. He tried to fight back but he was hurt and the guy was really strong, so it was no help.

"What are you doing? Where are you taking me?" he asked and the guy only gave a smirk as a reply.

Chris realized they were heading to the empty toilet building which was in really bad condition and out of use. The guy dragged him in, threw him on the stained floor and locked the door.

"What are you gonna do to me? You gonna beat me up? Go ahead, then. Coward", Chris spat and was kicked in the stomach. He groaned in pain but tried to get up, only to be pushed back down.

"So you're a fag, huh? Then you're gonna get treated like one", the guy said and Chris' eyes widened as he suddenly realized what the guy was about to do. He tried to crawl away from the guy but yelped as the guy grabbed his collar, lifting him up.

"Let me go", he yelled as he was pushed against the wall and the guy started to open his belt. He tried to kick him and hit him but the guy was too strong compared to him.

He closed his eyes as he felt his pants fall down. This wasn't happening, it couldn't be happening. He tried to knock his heels against each other three times, whispering: "There's not place like home, there's no place like home, there's no place like home."

When he opened his eyes, he saw that guy smirking at him. Then he was turned around so he was facing the wall. He closed his eyes again, trying to hold back tears. He let out a painful scream and the guy penetrated into him without any preparation.

"Stop it", he cried out, but only felt the guy pushing himself deeper into him. He bit his lip so hard he felt it starting to bleed and he couldn't stop the tears from falling.

"Please, stop", he pleaded again. It was hurting so bad, a pain like he'd never experienced before and never wanted to again, it was awful and it was humiliating and he just wanted it to stop.

Eventually, it did stop. The guy pulled out of him and let him fall on the ground. He was still sobbing and he was still hurt so bad and why had he done this to him?

He opened his eyes as the guy grabbed his chin to make him look him in the eyes.

"If you tell anyone, you're dead. Got that, fag?" Chris could see the guy meant it, his voice was steady and full of hatred and disgust, as well as his eyes. He nodded. The guy let go and landed a one last kick to his stomach before heading out, leaving a sobbing mess behind him.

This wasn't fair. Sure, he was gay, but he didn't see how it was anyone else's problem. Why the hell had this happened to him? What was so wrong about him that the guy had had to do pretty much the worst thing possible?

He felt so dirty and humiliated and wrong and he hurt so bad.

He closed his eyes and just laid there on the filthy floor, just wanting it all the end.

"Chris?" He was shaken out of his thoughts when he heard his name. He opened his teary eyes to look at Darren, who was frowning worriedly.

"I don't really wanna talk about it", he said quietly, snuggling closer to Darren. The curly-haired boy nodded and held Chris close.

"If you're ever ready to talk about it, just remember that I'm right here."

Chris smiled slightly and looked at Darren in his hazel eyes.

"I know. Thank you." Then he closed his eyes again and rested his head on Darren's shoulder.

"You having any more scenes today?" Darren asked and Chris shook his head slightly.

"No, that was the last scene of the day."

"You wanna go watch a movie?"

"I'd love to", Chris smiled as he opened his eyes to look at Darren's smiling face. The other boy stood up and grabbed Chris' hand to help him up. He wiped off a couple tears from the boy's face before taking his hand again and leading him out of the toilets.