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Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto
Naruto was hands down Konoha's most unpredictable ninja. This had been proven on many occasions, everyone agreed. Even though he seemed extremely simpleminded, and that he really was, there still was no way of knowing what the boy was actually thinking. Unless it came to ramen, but we all have our weaknesses.
As for Naruto's latest list of unpredictable and most surprising things, there was that occasion when Sasuke stepped through the gates of Konoha, making his way back home with an uninterested expression on his face, as if he had been on a day walk or something. It was then, when Naruto bounced on Sasuke, challenging him into a little friendly spar.
When their little friendly match to the death, which destroyed a good amount of Konoha's buildings, was over, Naruto smiled widely and gave a hearty hug to the almost unconscious Sasuke. Even though they were both under surveillance and expected to pay for the damages after that, things were looking good for the two rivals.
Then there was that time when Naruto just suddenly seemed to realize it, when he was eating ramen with Kakashi and Sai. He had been happily chattering his head off, slurping ramen, and then suddenly stopped, eyes wide. And dear God, Naruto was gay. Just like that. The straightest boy in the village. Gay. Like bending four meters wide iron bar into the shape of a dashing rainbow.
Even Kakashi had to admit he had been a little surprised. But no one blamed him. It was hard to accept that Naruto was gay. The inventor of Sexy no Jutsu. Tsk. What was the world coming to?
Even though it might have been a little predictable, Naruto had surprisingly chosen Sasuke to set his eyes on. Surprisingly, because the two of them fought all the time. And I don't mean bickering, but fighting like two enraged animals trying to protect their territory. Poor training grounds haven't been the same since then.
Someone had to go and stop them every time they decided to spar a little or the village might have been in danger. One day it was Kakashi's turn to play the parent who picked the children up. But to his surprise, there was a whole different battle going on, as Naruto was doing Sasuke against a tree. With a look that said 'I'll make you scream my name, bitch.'
Kakashi would have thought of is as a rape, if it weren't for Sasuke's constant weak insults directed at Naruto for almost every little move he made 'you can't even thrust har- ah!', 'I guess it just isn't long enou- nnngh!!'. The surprising thing about this wasn't that his former students were having rough sex on the training grounds, no. It was the fact that Naruto was doing Sasuke and not the other way around.
Though, in Kakashi's opinion, both of his former students looked like they'd bottom, only Sakura seemed seme enough, which was kind of ironic and sad in a way. So, as it was impossible for the both of them to bottom, one of them had to do it. But Kakashi still had kind of thought that Sasuke would have topped.
As for the latest result of making people surprised, Naruto had gone a little too far with him being unpredictable. It was ridiculous, really.
About a month after that little show Kakashi had witnessed, Naruto dragged the protesting Uchiha with him to see Tsunade, telling her that Sasuke had been throwing up a bit too much. With great difficulty, she examined the Uchiha, then seating the two boys down in front of her.
"Congratulations, you're pregnant."
She said in the most bored and unimpressed tone she could muster. Though, Naruto knew better than that. Her eyes were glinting dangerously, and that was hint enough that the Godaime wanted to strap Sasuke in her lab and do many unpleasant experiments. Ignoring it fully, Naruto turned to the frozen Sasuke and smiled widely.
"Hear that? We're going to have a baby!"
Sasuke did hear, loud and clear. And he kind of did need children to repopulate his clan, though he didn't actually want those screaming, crying, time-consuming, pink, little blobs of meat. And he certainly hadn't planned to carry one himself. Of course not. Men couldn't get pregnant.
Trust Naruto to ignore the way nature is supposed work. How was this even possible?
Tsunade seemed to wonder that too, keeping her steady seemingly calm gaze on Sasuke. It really took all of her self restrain to not to drag Sasuke, whom she didn't like that much, into that previously mentioned lab.
Sasuke sat frozen, not really knowing what to do about the situation. Tsunade wondered if she had enough sake to get the two of them drunk and then do whatever she wanted with them. Naruto was cooing over his and Sasuke's yet to be born baby, surprisingly not that surprised about the situation, which would have made the two occupants in the room suspicious, if it wasn't for the fact that they were currently deep in their thoughts.
To be continued...
Mpreg... I really don't get it. But as I was thinking about it the other day, I just felt like doing a story about it. So, there shall be Mperegginess. Yes.
Comment and Criticize!