Author's Note: IT'S SO FLUFFY! I am still of the fence about it so I would appreciate the reviews!
Disclaimer: I do not own NCIS:LA or any of the characters. If I did, I wouldn't be known as the nap time master. Yeah, go teaching!
Chapter 1: The Excuse of the Cute Kitten
"We don't know that G."
The deep bravado of the former Navy Seal echoed through the OSP doors, freezing the triumphant cheers of the Tech Analysts in their throats.
"We aren't blind Sam," Callen responded. "I am just looking at the facts."
Eric and Nell heard the voices coming closer to the center of OSP's but couldn't move, frozen with fear. "Do you think they arrest people for illegally downloading games that have yet to be released?" Eric asked innocently.
Nell eyed him with surprise, "Do we really want to find out?"
After the briefest second, hands flew to the keyboards, hiding the bloody battle they had just won. Just as the last screen cleared from the battle and returned to the monotonous tax reports they were suppose to be working on, the doors opened and in sauntered Sam and Callen, too engrossed in their argument to notice the beads of sweat dripping from the techies faces.
"I am telling you G, we don't know." Sam's voice was determined, but Callen's response was an overly exaggerated eye roll.
"Hey guys," Eric greeted, his voice a notch higher, throwing obvious suspicion in the wind. Why do they have to be human lie detectors? "Where's Kensi and Deeks?" he asked, clearing his throat of guilt.
"In the gym," Callen replied, plopping down in the nearest chair with a sigh. "Apparently Kensi thinks Deeks needs to work on his communications skills. She said they suck."
"What does that even mean?" Nell asked, tired of trying to figure out every cryptic message the two would send.
Now it was Sam's turn to roll his eyes, "It's Kensi and Deeks. I don't even think they know."
That brought a knowing sigh from the group. One thing that they had learned early in the Kensi/Deeks partnership...relationship...thing, is never try and understand the Kensi/Deeks thing.
The room was suddenly filled with an uncomfortable silence, causing the guilty techies to spin slowly in their chairs, finally trying to understand the figures and numbers they should have been working on for the past three hours.
"Don't G. Just don't." Sam's deep voice broke the silence bringing the interest of Eric and Nell out with it.
"I just want a second opinion," Callen stated nonchalantly, piquing their interest even further.
Sam's frustration was palpable as he forced his words out through gritted teeth, "If it was happening, we would know! They are two of the most transparent people on the face of the Earth."
"But they are also trained investigators," Callen continued, either oblivious to Sam's continual rise in anger, or enjoying the frustration he was bringing out. "They know how to lie when they want."
The cryptic conversation was becoming too much for Eric. He could be playing Assassin's Creed 4 instead of listening to this drivel going. He should at least know what's going on, "Who are you talking about?"
Sam and Callen's response was instant and simultaneous, "Kensi and Deeks."
"And what," Nell chimed in, curious herself, "is the conversation?"
"G here thinks Kensi and Deeks' thing may have reached another level of inappropriate workplace behavior," Sam responded, clearly hoping this conversation would be over.
"So," Eric said slowly, trying to make sure he wasn't completely off the mark, "Sam you don't think that they are, you know," he stuttered as he laced his fingers together and squeezed, "together, and Callen you do?"
The pair nodded, glad that Eric comprehended the source of the argument that had been going on for days, "Yeah, I'm with Sam, we could know."
"Come on!" Callen defended, "Have you seen those two? It's the little things that have changed, more touching, annoying looks across the bullpen. Something is going on with them."
Sam's frustration rose again, proving that Callen could bring that out like nobody's business. "They were doing those things the moment they met. If they were together, we would know!" he yelled with a huff. "When it comes to undercover, nobody is better at selling a lie than those two."
"Present company excluded of course," Callen interrupted with an almost undetectable smirk.
"But when it comes to each other," Sam continued as if never interrupted, "they are the worst liars in the building. If they were together, we would be able to tell."
"I'm with Sam," Eric said, raising his hand high in the air, "even I can lie better than those two," he finished with a chuckle.
Nobody in the room agreed, knowing that no matter how obvious Kensi and Deeks were, a child could lie better than Eric.
"Anyway," Eric said trying escape the awkward situation, "who's team are you on Nell?"
"Neither," she stated, turning back to her computer.
"Well, you have to choose," Eric said nervously, seeing Callen and Sam's arms slowly crossing over their chests, the classic I-am-about-to-beat-the-ever-living-crap-out-of-you -in-a-second-if-you-don't-talk look. It was terrifying.
"Listen," Nell started, clearly not intimidated by the two men both twice her size. "Kensi is not a fan of P.D.A.'s and Deeks values his life too much to push her into that." The men were silent as the truth of her words sank in, "The only way we would know those two were together is if we walked in on them in the showers or caught them making out in the gym or something..."
Nell's eyes grew wide as her sentence trailed off. She slowly swung her chair around and faced the group, the same look of comprehension on their faces.
"Where," Eric asked, breaking the awed silence, "exactly are Kensi and Deeks again?"
Callen and Sam's minds quickly formed a plan of attack, "Hey, I think I'm gonna go down to the gym for a quick game of ball, work out some soreness from the chair," Sam said quickly, eying Callen with a knowing glare.
"Hey man, want a buddy?" Callen asked already making his way to the door.
"Well, if it's gonna be a game," Eric chimed in quickly, rising up from his chair, "you're gonna need an official ref. I've been told I'm quite amazing."
I'll come too!" Nell said as all four were rushing out the doors, "I love a good show."
The group ran down the stairs, knowing how suspicious they looked, but not caring 'cause the looks they would see on Kensi and Deeks faces was going to be well worth it.
They made it to the bullpen in record time, knowing in a minute they would have the answer to the argument that had been plaguing them.
"Hey, where are you guys going?" a voice called, stopping them for just a moment.
Eric quickly responded, wanting to leave the bullpen and get to the gym as soon as he could, "We're going to see if Kensi and Deeks..." but his words stuck in his throat as he turned to come face-to-face with a confused Kensi and Deeks.
Kensi's face turned from confusion to suspicion, quickly putting the pieces together. "Kensi and Deeks what?" she asked, a hint of malicious which brought a visible shiver from Eric.
All four members of the guilty party froze, each trying to come up with a decent excuse for their actions.
Sam's mind went into overdrive thinking of the lie that would set them free. We were heading to the gym, he thought to himself, seeing the anger in Kensi's eyes rise with each second of silence. We could just say we were gonna play a game of ball. Yeah, it's the perfect excuse. He opened his mouth, ready to play smooth Sam. "We-"
"We just wanted to see if you guys have seen the latest cat video," curse you Eric. The shock and confusion was plastered on everyone's face at the thought of Eric's worst excuse to date. "You know, where the cat is following a laser outside and then it doesn't realize that the sliding glass door is closed and it slams into it. It is priceless," Eric finished his nervous rant with a smile, thinking about just how cute that kitten was.
The anger was now gone from Kensi's face, replaced now with sheer confusion at Eric's words, "I hate cats."
"Yeah, I've already seen it," Deeks chimed in with a shrug. "It really sounds funnier than it is."
Kensi quickly turned to him, resuming the easy banter that was the cornerstone of their unique partnership. "Of course you have," she smiled, "because all mature adults with social lives watch cat videos."
"No, mature adults do other activities," Deeks smirked, following Kensi's retreating figure back to the bullpen. "I can demonstrate sometime, just gotta find the cape."
Kensi just rolled her eyes, trying, and failing, to hide the smirk that appeared at his words, "Don't forget the tequila."
At seeing the banter resume, the group slowly backed away, knowing it was their only chance of escape.
"Cats?" Callen hissed as they retreated. "Seriously Eric, that's your big escape plan, cats?"
"Hey, like you did anything better," Eric defended as he climbed dejectedly back to OSPs, "and it is a really cute video." And with that, the group parted ways, knowing never to bring up the humiliation again.
"And done," Kensi said with a flourish as she closed the last file on the mess she called a desk. "All the case reports for the past week are done and I am going home. You coming Deeks?"
The final sentence of her gloat brought Sam and Callen's head up so quickly, there was an audible snap. "What, you two hanging out after this?" Callen asked cautiously, knowing that with their thing every word was like walking on eggshells.
"No," Kensi replied casually as she grabbed her bag and searched for her keys. "Deeks just feels emasculated by his girly car."
"Hey I am not emasculated!" he defended quickly, grabbing his bag as he saw Kensi finding her keys under the Reese's wrappers on her desk. "My car is very manly, and fuel efficient."
Kensi's laugh reverberated around the emptying bullpen, "Deeks, the one time I was forced to drive your car, I had three teenage girls tell me it was, and I quote, 'So cute and like the perfect girl car,'" she finished in her best valley girl impression.
"That never happened," Deeks said, searching his memory for this moment.
Kensi just shook her head as she left the bullpen, "Venice beach, last weekend, right before those same girls called you "Shaggy" and laughed when Scooby came chasing after you."
"Oh yeah," Deeks remembered with a smile. "Okay, touche," and with that, the pair left the building leaving Sam and Callen even more curious then this morning.
"I hate those two," Sam said exasperated.
"Kensi and Deeks one," Callen counted with a shake of his head. "Us, zero."
"That was the most boring day I think I have ever experienced," Deeks complained as he and Kensi walked closer to her car. He stopped and looked cautiously around, making sure the cameras hadn't moved and that their favorite blind spot was still intact. He gently reached out for Kensi, bringing her body flush with his as the smile spread across his face. "So, Fern," he began, his face now inches from hers, "got any plans for tonight? I was thinking my place, beer, movie, maybe you could help me find my cape?" he closed the distance between them, softly kissing her. Her face lit up with the perfect smile reserved for only him.
"Your place?" she questioned as she broke the kiss, her arms still wrapped around his body. "I was thinking my place. Maybe we could start that book club you talked about."
Deeks laughed loudly, the sound echoing off the walls of the parking garage, "Please Kensi. If I wanted to break my neck by tripping on your clothes, then maybe, but seriously a 'book club?' That's..." But he never finished as the memory of a past conversation of ancient books flitted across his mind, "Is it Karma Sutra?"
Kensi just wormed her way even closer, her breath fanning his face, making it even harder for him to focus on her words, "Three months Deeks, and you still have to ask?" and with that, she released herself from his grip, slowly walking toward her car with an extra swing in her hips.
"Yeah, your place is good. It's very, very good," he said clearing his throat and practically tripped over his feet on the way to her car, "Ah, thank you Hetty."
Note: I can continue this story if you like it, so let me know!