I.

The first one took her by surprise. They were rollerskating, hands brushing against each other, but not quite holding each other. They heard each other only through the blasting music and the yells of children and birthday parties. Yet here they were, fresh out of college and fresh out of love. Dagny left hers because the other pulled out a ring, and Alicia left hers because she wanted more than the other had to offer.

Alicia laughed as Dagny fell forward and scraped her knee on the illuminated hardwood, but she pulled her up and close to her. The lights and the people moved around them, but they stood still on the edge of the rink as the world turned around them.

Alicia leaned in and kissed her. Dagny's eyes widened, but she slowly closed them and breathed in the faint smell of her perfume. Her hands found their way up Alicia's back, tracing the patterns of the fabric that lined her shirt. Alicia giggled and pulled away.

Dagny raised her eyebrows. What was so funny? Did she move too fast? What if Alicia didn't mean to kiss her?

Alicia laced her fingers into Dagny's and motioned for them to keep skating.

II.

Her favorite one was months after the first one. They both stood in white dresses with rings on their fingers. Alicia's smile was on her lips as they met with Dagny's. Dagny wrapped her arms around her new wife's waist and kissed her again and again.

She kissed her all night. Her lips, her neck, her shoulders, down her body. She didn't want to stop kissing her.

Even when the clock read the earliest hours of the morning, when Alicia was sound asleep, Dagny put her arm around her waist and kissed her neck.

This was what it was supposed to feel like.

III.

The last one was the day before Alicia left. Dagny had told her all about her newest discovery, and Alicia begged her not to go again. It was too soon after the last one, they barely had any time together. The trips weren't between being with her, being with her was between the trips. It had been too long since they had seen each other. Since they had really been in love.

Dagny felt her stomach drop. She loved her, she promised. Alicia wiped the tears that stained her eyes. She wasn't sure how she felt anymore. Not if this was going to be it.

Dagny sat next to her and took her hands in her own. She traced the pattern of her veins running up and down the back of her hands, the front of her wrists. She kissed them. She loved her, she promised. She just needed to make things right. She kissed her again, but the smile was no longer on Alicia's lips.

When Dagny woke up the next morning, there was an empty spot next to her in the bed. A piece of paper lay on the dresser saying that Alicia left. She couldn't deal with not being with her enough. She left her ring, glimmering with what was left of the love they had.

Dagny held it tight in her hands. She wanted to throw it away, she wanted to be mad, but she sat down at the foot of the bed and cried. Alicia wasn't going to come back. Not this time.

IV.

The ring hung from the long chain around her neck that tucked into her shirt. She held the flowers and her phone, hoping someone would call her and to tell her what to do. What if she completely gave up on her? What if she found someone else? What if she didn't even remember her?

She put the phone in her back pocket and stood on the doorstep. The white swirls on the black card made it stand out from the roses that it rested on. What if she didn't accept her apology? What if she didn't like roses anymore?

She went to knock on the door, but dropped her hand back to her side. Again - no, she couldn't do it. Alicia moved on. She knew that. She wouldn't have moved to another continent if it wasn't that way.

But maybe there was a chance.

She put the flowers on the doorstep and rang the doorbell and ran away.

V.

Nobody was at the door.