His hands were pressed up against the glass windows, his breath clouding the thin pane.
Dark green eyes were trained on the small body in the incubator.
All he could think of was her perfectness, his brain could not- would not focus on all the loud, beeping machines that she was attached to.
Her tiny hands were balled up in to fists and her toes were curled.
Her dark wispy hair was almost hidden by the pink hat sat on her head.
Her eyes were closed and her chest rose and fell rhythmically.
The nurses were in a constant stream, checking on her and changing her fluids but his mind didn't process any of it.
Had the nurse changed since the last time?
He wouldn't know, all he could think about was that tiny, beautiful little girl lying there all alone.
He mentally flinched, or maybe he had done it for real, when she gave a weak cry as one of the doctors injected her with some kind of medication.
He had been standing there for hours, maybe days, and he had yet to move.
He was rooted to the spot and more than anything, his fingers itched to touch her, to hold her, to do anything that would reassure him that that was his little girl in there.
Not just some sick baby who the doctors said there was less than a fifty percent chance of surviving.
It wasn't fair.
He had been living in the hospital for over three weeks.
Watching helplessly as women came in with their huge stomachs and came out thirty pounds lighter
with a baby in their arms.
His was three days old and he'd never held her, touched her, hell he hadn't even given her a name yet.
He just kept watching the way her eyes would crinkle at the corners as she opened them.
Or, when she yawned her little fists would stretch high in the air.
A nurse came and tapped him on the shoulder, he barely looked up from his place behind the glass, too captivated by his daughter.
"If you want to go in there, I won't tell anybody."
Her words were quiet but he'd heard well enough.
"I can't. Rachel doesn't want me to."
The nurse, although he couldn't see it, looked at him incredulously.
"Honey, I am a mother, we don't always know best."
He turned to face her then, her dark eyes were kind and her forehead crinkled.
He nodded slowly, still not quite believing of the nurse's generosity.
He followed her in to the room, wrinkling his nose at the sterile smell.
It was too clean.
The nurse walked over to the incubator and slowly picked up the child, handing her over to her father.
Puck stood in awe of the tiny creature in his arms.
Her cries immediately ceased and her eyes flitted up to look at him.
His breath hitched and his eyes welled up as the baby in his arms gurgled, placing her thumb in her
tiny, rosebud mouth.
"Daddy's girl." The nurse smiled knowingly.
He shook his head, knowing there would never be a chance for that.
Her breathes were gentle as she stared intently at her daddy.
The kind red headed nurse walked out of the room, leaving Puck with his baby girl.
He looked at her, not quite sure what to say.
Rachel didn't want him to have anything to do with her.
This tiny little thing that had been the centre of his very universe for the past nine months.
He readjusted her in his arms so she could see him more clearly.
"Sariah," he whispered.
It meant Princess in Hebrew.
He and Rachel had been arguing over names for the past four months ever since they found out they
were having a girl.
He'd never really known the meaning of love until he had met Rachel.
Much less unconditional love, which is just what he had with his little girl.
He wanted so badly to call her his own, to tell her he was her daddy.
Rachel didn't want him.
She told him he was a screw up- exactly like his father.
She said she needed stability and she wasn't going to get that with him.
It stung.
As he gazed adoringly down at the infant in his arms he wondered silently how men like his dad could walk away from their children.
Whatever Rachel had said, he was not his father.
He would be there for his little girl, if only Rachel would let him.
He exhaled an angry breath.
His baby girl had melted him from inside and out, it was true.
Sariah had that musky, new baby smell that made women go wild.
Her eyes looked exactly like his, he thought, hazel green with golden flecks.
It was Rachel who had decided to break of their relationship.
He remembered feeling so hurt and betrayed.
It had been her who had changed him for the better and now she had taken that all away.
It was in her seventh month and she said that they would never have worked out and she needed someone who she could rely on, someone who would take care of their baby.
Or her baby as she had called her.
It had been painful to hear her say that.
Was she so ashamed of him that she couldn't even acknowledge him as her baby's father?
Ask anyone and they'd tell you that Noah Puckerman wasn't one for feelings and such, but there was so much to say.
So much he'd wanted to tell her, let her know how much he loved her.
He'd never get that chance again so now was the time to let her know his thoughts.
"Hey baby girl. I'm your daddy but I think you already know that. Even if your mommy said that we can't be together, you two are the most important people in the world to me. I want you to know that even if I won't be around, I love you more than I can say.
Sariah, you're my baby girl, forever and always. I know your mommy said I should move on, but I can't. Know why? Because I love her. And I love you."
His voice was cracking and his eyes were watering.
He refused to cry.
However much of a pussy his little girl had turned him into, he wasn't going to cry in front of her.
"I need you to understand. I didn't want this. Not for me or for you. And I want nothing more than to take you and mommy and just get out of here and never look back. But that's our secret."
He kissed her puckered forehead.
"Sariah, no matter what mommy says, I love you. More than anything in the entire world. Just keep that in mind okay?"
His heart was breaking with every word and he struggled to keep his emotions in check.
"Sariah, I think mommy is making a big mistake and I think she knows it too. Just, look me up, okay?"
The damn broke and he couldn't hold his cries anymore.
A single tear fell from his face on to Sariah's face.
He put his daughter back into her incubator and she instantly started to wail.
Her cries echoed throughout the room and he wanted nothing more than to pick her up and tell her it'd be okay.
But if he went back, he wasn't sure he'd ever be able to let go.
As Noah Puckerman walked out of the door, not just to the room, but to his daughter's life, Rachel Berry stood watching, tears flowing down her face.
AN.
Just an idea I had!
Let me know what you think.
I can't really do angst, but I'm gonna try.