Choking On the Truth

By Effervescent Shine

Warning: The pairing for this fic is L/N. That's right, Lily and Narcissa. Which means that it's SLASH, a female/female pairing…and you shouldn't read it if it's going to make you all annoyed. Okay, well, it's not slashy yet, but it will be, I promise.

Disclaimer: Everybody belongs to JK, and not me. And the title comes from the song by Bif Naked. I've included some lyrics at the bottom for your enjoyment, and they belong to her.

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"I hate boys! They suck! He sucks!" I was ranting. I was ranting loudly, and I didn't even care that I was doing it publicly and that I had scared away some little Ravenclaws and that I probably looked really crazy.

"Really? And who exactly does he suck?" A smooth voice broke through my fuming, and I turned to look at the person behind this odd question. She was leaning up against a wall, if you could consider a stance that graceful leaning. She was smirking, and one delicate eyebrow was raised under pale hair.

"Excuse me?" Due to my mood, that came out a lot more rudely than necessary, but the girl seemed unaffected. She drifted towards me and said calmly, "Oh, nothing. Just having my own problems with boys, that's all." I could totally sympathize, even though she didn't seem very upset at all.

"I know." I nodded. "They're so infuriating. They make me sick!" Before breaking into another rant, I stopped and considered this girl before me. "I've never seen you before, are you new here?"

"Here?" She looked doubtfully at the stone walls of the hallways surrounding us. "Oh, no. I go to Beauxbatons, I'm just visiting. My name is Narcissa."

Oh, Beauxbatons. So that explained why she was so different. I look at her waves of perfect pale hair and self-consciously run my hand though my own. "I'm Lily."

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She was looking at me almost shyly, despite the outgoing way she had carried on minutes ago. She nervously played with her red hair –color I wish I had- and I searched for something to say to make her more relaxed. "So, tell me about this boy, this one who's causing you to wage a verbal war on the entire male gender."

She frowned. "Oh, I don't know if I want to talk about it." But she followed me over to the side of the hallway, where a bench was nestled into an alcove for us to sit on.

"No, you should." I encouraged her. "It'll make you feel better." Besides, I was bored, and her storming through the hallway like some sort of crusader was the best thing that had happened all day.

"Maybe you're right. Okay." She took a deep breath, and I realized that it was to calm herself down. Again. Nice temper. "His name is James, and I like him. I mean I really like him. And I thought that he liked me too. I thought that we were dating. But lately, he's never around. And he has really bad excuses for where he goes. And then sometimes, when we're together, in the halls and stuff, he just seems so cautious. Like he's worried somebody will see us, or something." She looked so downcast, her green eyes filling with tears. I wanted to say something comforting, but subtlety had never been one of my strong points, so I ended up being truthful. "Well, it sounds like he's cheating on you. Or at least thinking about it. Have you seen him with any other girls?" Whoops. More tears. Well, it wasn't my fault. But I inwardly cringed anyway, and tried to make it better. "Hey, it's like you said, guys suck." This got me a sniffle in response, and a pause as Lily collected herself. After a few minutes, she looked up at me. "So, tell me about your guy trouble."

I laughed. "Oh, it's not trouble exactly. Actually, the whole thing is rather amusing. See, my parents told me about some friends of theirs, who have a son. They're a rich family, and my mother thought it'd be nice for me – and for the family name – if I married someone like that, so I came over here. To meet him, see what I thought, get him interested. Whatever. But when I finally tracked him down and watched him for a while, I noticed him with another guy." I rolled my eyes as I remembered. And then I noticed Lily looking at me blankly.

"So?" she asked. She didn't get it, that's so cute…hm, I hoped I wasn't going to have to explain what sex was. "I mean with another guy." I emphasized, hoping she'd catch on. The look on her face told me she did. "Oh…alright then." She muttered quietly.

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Oh. I was blushing so hard I was sure my face matched my hair, and I hoped that she didn't notice. She must've thought I was so naïve, but I honestly wasn't used to this kind of thing. And she had said it so casually! I realized that she was talking again, and forced my thoughts back onto the conversation.

"…my mother would just tell me to lay on the charm and make him forget that he was ever anything but straight, but I don't really know. I'm sure I could find some other guy that would make everybody just as happy…" she trailed off, lost in thought, which unfortunately left me to mine. Okay, fine. I had to ask. If she laughed at me I'd just leave, right?

"Narcissa? Guys, two guys, from Hogwarts, gay?" She smirked again, and nodded. "Who?"

"Well, the one I was looking for is named Lucius. Lucius Malfoy." Oh. Slytherin, right? That quiet one who's always in the library. Okay then. "And the guy he was with, I don't know his name. But he was our age, and he was actually kind of attractive. He had dark, dark hair, and it was all messy, and…" I think she kept talking but at this point I wasn't sure. My eyes grew wide and I started breathing deeply. James. Oh, god. I thought that the idea of him with another girl was unbearable, but this? Oh god, I was going to cry some more. I couldn't…but, he. Oh, god. I muttered something to Narcissa, who was looking concerned, and ran out of the hallway.

I am honesty, and this is hard

You were everything I ever want

Your memory is sweet candy

The flavor's fading away…

I'm choking on the truth