"Louis are you okay?"
"What do you mean exactly, why wouldn't I be okay?" He asks, looking up from his book.
"Well yeah, I guess not. I just know you're parents been worried about you lately." He answers sitting down in the chair, carefully adjusting the baby's head in his arms.
"So they asked you to check up on me because they think I'm being a moody teenager? That's just great!" he closes the book a little harder than he means to, holding on tight too it in his lap.
Teddy just laughs. "No, no. Nothing like that. I'm not on a mission or anything else. I've been worried to you know. You've been quiet, like you're thinking a whole lot maybe." He gets the bottle from the table and gentle gives it to his infant daughter.
" When I have too many thoughts in my head I need to talk to someone, otherwise I'll explode. So that's it, if you need to – talk!"
Louis looks at him until it feels like Teddys eyes are looking through him. He moves his eyes to the little girl in Teddy's arm, his first niece, with strawberry blond hair and eyes that look purple right now. He doesn't know what to say or even if he wants to say anything at all. So he just shrugs uncommitted.
"I don't know. I don't really talk." He says hoping Teddy will eventually just drop the subject.
"As good a time as any to try then." He answers. He's clearly not going to drop the subject.
"I guess so." He looks out the window at the old oak tree in the middle of Teddy and Victories garden, he's loved that tree since they first moved in. It's thick branches reaching for the sky making it look unendingly tall and sitting under it makes you feel wonderfully small. Like it doesn't matter if he screws up cause the world's too big to notice.
He's trying to find some kind of words, some kind of beginning but it all seems to messy and complicated to actually put into words. "I don't know what to say."
"Well, are you unhappy?" he asks and Louis feels a little taken back with the forwardness of the question. Unhappy – it's such a big word to use. So dramatic and serious.
"No. I guess I'm just…. confused?! Like, there's a lot to think about, right. And especially right now. It seems a little too much some times. It's just…. Well I don't know. I guess it's normal, being a teenager" he brushes off, feeling like he's suddenly in too deep.
"Doesn't matter if it's normal or not, all that matter is how you feel." He puts the bottle back on the table, carefully bringing the baby to his shoulder for a burp. "What are you confused about?"
"Life I guess."
"You're avoiding me aren't you? You can tell me anything, I wont go tell on you. It won't change anything between us and definitely not how I think about you. Are you in trouble?"
"Nah, 'm not in trouble. "Louis tightens his grip on the book although his knuckles' already white. Now or never.
"I think I'm gay Teddy." He breathes out, somehow relieved and scared at the same time. "And I don't know, it's just… I don't know what mom and dad'll say, and how the cousins will react. And there's school. It's just. I don't know, it's just too much." He stares at his shoe, not wanting to look a Teddy.
"Louis relax. Look at me." His voice is kind but firm enough to make Louis lift his eyes to Teddy's which are filled with a soft smile. "School will be fine, I mean you might get some crap from Slytherin, but nothing you can't handle. You're parents are going to tell you they love you, for who you are, because of who you are. The cousin might tease you a bit, cause that's who they are, but they'll love you just the same, cause you're exactly the same, nothing's changed. I know that, Louis. We know that."
"I guess so." He nods. Still not knowing how to find words, how to try to explain everything that's been running through his mind. That despite how nice it is to hear somebody tell him that, assure him that his parents will be okay with, it isn't quite enough. He kind of already knew that, somewhere inside of him, though it could be hard to believe sometimes, when he couldn't even figure out how he felt about it himself.
"I can see how it must be confusing Louis. Scary even. It's never easy to realize that there's something about you, that's different from a lot of other people. That you might stick out. Some may find that shallow, but it's not like that. It's fearing that you might meet trouble because of who you are. And that's scary as hell." He coos at the baby as she burps, kissing her softly on her forehead. "You're brave to tell me. That must have been hard."
"I'm just afraid people won't understand."
"Don't be. I promise everything'll be fine." He gets out of the chair, walking to the couch with the baby in his arms. "We all love you. And now I think Hope would like to have her godfather feed her the rest of the bottle and stop worrying."
He carefully hands him the baby and the half empty bottle before walking towards the door with a smile.
"Thanks Teddy." He says to the retrieving back, hoping he'll hear how much he actually means it.
"Anytime man, anytime."
Louis settles in a little cozier, balancing the baby till he has her resting comfortably in his arms. He eases the nipple into her mouth, looking down at her tiny face with big curious eyes blinking sleepily at him.
"Everything will be fine." He whispers to her.