Bed of Roses
Tryin' hard to capture the moment;
this morning, I don't know.
Tommy stared out the window of his room at the ski lounge, the letter still in his hand. He read it for what had to be the hundredth time, still not comprehending what it said.
Tommy, there's someone else...
He crumpled the paper into a ball and pressed his forehead against the cool glass, then smoothed out the letter again, as if through sheer will he could make the content change. The words still stared at him, Kimberly's swirly handwriting night black against the white of the paper. "Why?" he whispered. "What happened between us?" Memories of the week before she left for Florida played through his head: the two of them at the beach, at the park, hanging out at the juice bar...
and some blonde gave me nightmares;
I think that she's still in my bed
Lost in his reverie, he didn't notice Heather approaching behind him. "Hey, lover," she greeted him, twining her arms around his waist. "What're you reading?"
"Nothing." He folded the letter up and slipped it into his pocket. "Sleep well?"
"Incredibly. But I was a bit disappointed when I woke up alone." She twisted a strand of his hair in her fingers. "I was looking forward to a replay of last night."
"Heather..." He was interrupted by her turning his head to face her and kissing him. When she broke off the kiss, he caught her hands in his. "Heather, this shouldn't have happened last night."
"Why? Because we just met? It doesn't bother me; we can get to know each other over breakfast."
"It's not that. It's..." He retrieved the letter from his pocket. "It's this. My girlfriend just broke up with me through a letter. Last night, I was..."
"Rebound. I get it." Heather pulled away, moving across the room to pick up her shoes. "You were rebounding, and I just happened to be convenient." She pulled on her heels and turned to face him. "Call me when you're over her."
they won't make of me when I'm dead.
Tommy sighed as the door clicked shut. I'm a grade-A jerk. He crumpled Kimberly's letter and threw it across the room.
while some marching band beats its own beat
in my head while we're talking
"Hey, Tommy. Feeling better this morning?" Kat asked when he joined them for breakfast.
"Worse."
"We saw Heather leaving your room this morning," Billy told him. "Does that have anything to do with how you feel this morning?"
"It has a lot to do with it." He accepted the cup of black coffee the waitress handed him and took a long gulp. "I told her about Kim, and the letter. She didn't take it too well."
"And you thought she would?" Kat shook her head. "Tommy, sometimes I wonder about you."
He looked up, then averted his eyes as Heather entered the cafe. "I just felt I had to tell her. It seemed like the right thing to do at the time."
"Tommy, Kim's gone. You're going to have to accept that. You shouldn't feel guilty for being attracted to someone else."
He turned the cup so the handle was facing away. "I shouldn't. I know that. She's already found someone else; why shouldn't I?" He picked up the napkin and twisted it in his hands. "Because I still love her, that's why."
about love and the truth and what you mean to me
"Tommy, you have to get over her." Billy handed Tommy his gloves. "You can't be obsessing about Kim while you're on the mountain. You'll get hurt, or hurt someone else."
"I'll be fine." He looked up at the snow-covered slopes. "I'm not going to be on any of the dangerous slopes. I'll keep my eyes open, and I'll focus on my board. This is what I need."
I want to lay you down on a bed of roses
for tonight I sleep on a bed of nails
oh I want to be just as close as
the Holy Ghost is
and lay you down
on a bed of roses
Well I'm so far away,
each step that I take's on my way home;
"Tommy! Wait up!" He turned and waited for Kat to catch up with him. "I thought you might like some company," she said, breathing hard.
"Thanks." He continued towards the lodge. "I still feel like such a fool. Like I should have seen this coming."
"No one can see a break up coming when the parties involved are a thousand miles apart. Trust me on this."
"Oh?"
"When my family moved to Angel Grove, I still had a boyfriend back in Sydney."
"I didn't know."
"It didn't last very long. We had the same diving coach; the rift started after my accident. I quit diving, so I didn't see him as much. When we moved, being on opposite sides of an ocean really strained the relationship."
"I'd bet."
"But at least he waited until I was visiting over break to tell me. I didn't think Kim was the letter type."
"She usually isn't."
"Tommy, maybe you should call her. I mean, if this is really bothering you, it might help to hear her voice."
"Maybe I should." He gave Kat a quick hug. "Thanks, Kat. You're a true friend."
each night to see through this pay phone.
Tommy cradled the phone close to his ear as he dialed the number of Kimberly's dorm room. He'd dialed this number so many times over the past month, it felt like second nature to him. He waited as the phone rang once, twice. On the third ring, someone picked up.
"Hello?"
"Hi, this is..."
"Tommy. Hi, Tommy, it's Mirry."
"Hi, Miranda."
"You just missed Kim. She and Brian were going out for pizza. It's their splurge, since they both made the US International teams."
"Tell her congratulations for me, okay? I'll be rooting for her."
"She'll be glad to hear that. Want me to have her call you back?"
"If you could."
"No problem."
till the bird on the wire flies me back to you
Tommy hung the phone up with a tiny click. "So I guess it's true."
"Is she going to call back?" Billy stepped into the room.
"How'd..."
"Kat told me you were going to call Kim. I just figured from the last I heard, and the look on your face, that she was out."
"With Brian."
"Who's Brian?" A light clicked in Billy's mind. "Oh, the 'someone else,' isn't he?"
"I guess so. They went for pizza."
"Pizza? Kim?"
"A celebration. She made the International team."
"Wow. She's on her way to her dream."
And I'm not a part of it, Tommy thought.
"Baby, blind love is true."
for tonight I sleep on a bed of nails
oh I want to be just as close as
the Holy Ghost is
and lay you down
on a bed of roses
whiskey's gone dry
Barkeeper's wig's crooked
and she's giving me the eye,
I might have said yes,
but I laughed so hard I think I died.
"So are you going to be okay?" Kat asked as the three sat down in the lounge restaurant for dinner. Tommy closed his eyes and just thought.
"I think so. I mean, Kim's happy, right? She's in love, she's made the elite team, and she has friends there." He toyed with the napkin, twisting it between his fingers.
"That's not what was Kat was asking. Are you going to be okay?" Billy took the napkin from Tommy, setting it on the table.
He looked from Billy to Kat and back again. "I think so. I have you guys, and the rest of the team. I'll be fine." He reached out and took their hands. "Friends together, friends forever, right?"
"Right."
Now as you close your eyes,
know I'll be thinking about you
Tommy lay on his bed, staring up at the ceiling, thinking. Kim's gone. She's with "Brian," whoever Brian is. He took out a small pouch he kept under his shirt and emptied the contents into his palm. A small quartz falcon, a small alabaster tiger and a small jade dragon, representing past and present. A worn gold coin, from an I Ching set. A wooden rune, representing strength. And a silver ring, with a clear pink stone ringed with smaller green stones.
He'd planned to give Kimberly that ring on their graduation day, as a promise for a different sort of ring when he could afford it. He kept it in the pouch, close to his heart, as a reminder to himself of how much he loved her. Every so often, he'd take it out and look at it, notice how the stone seemed to sparkle.
Today, it looked as dull as mud.
He rolled onto his side, staring at the beige phone on the nighttable. I wish she'd call back. I need to talk to her, even if it's just to hear her say everything I already know.
to stand in her spotlight again
He had just swiched off the light when the phone rang. "Hello?"
"Tommy?"
"Kim?" He sat up and flicked on the light.
"Mirry said you called."
"I did. I got your letter."
"Oh."
"Yeah." He sat up, hanging his legs over the side of the bed. "Why, Kim?"
"Tommy, this is hard..."
"No kidding. I never saw that coming. Adam was reading the letter to me as I was benching. I'm just glad he stopped when he reached that part."
"Tommy..."
"Why?"
"Sometimes things just happen!" she exclaimed. "I didn't want to hurt you..."
"Then why did you?"
"Tommy..." He could hear her sniff, then continue. "I still love you, Tommy, but..."
"Who's Brian?"
"Brian? How...oh. Mirry." She paused; Tommy twisted the cord around his index finger, absently watching his fingertip turn purple. "He's...another of Gunthar's students."
"Is he the 'someone else' you mentioned in the letter?"
"Kind of, yeah."
"What's he like? Other than what you said in the letter."
"He's really nice. He won a bronze in the '94 Olympics on rings."
"Oh."
"Tommy..."
"Yeah?"
"I wanted this to be easy on both of us."
"It's not easy on me."
"It's not easy on me, either."
"I love you, Kim."
"Tommy, don't...don't make this even harder."
"Kim..." His communicator beeped on the nighttable. "Damn. Kim, can I call you back?"
"Tommy...you probably shouldn't. Let's just make this a clean break? It'll be best in the long run."
"Fine." He hung up the phone and just started at it a moment before strapping his communicator to his wrist.
but you know that don't mean I ain't lonely
"Tommy, are you sure you'll be okay? You were distracted in the battle," Kat said, touching his arm as they walked through the lobby.
"You know what? I really don't want to go back to my room." Tommy switched directions. "Want to go to the cafe for hot chocolate? My treat."
"Um...sure."
I'm sorry, Kim. I'll always love you, but like you said...a clean break.
I'd die to defend
Tommy looked at the monitor where it showed Kimberly and Jason trapped in the bilge of Divatox's submarine. "We have to rescue them." He looked over at Kat, and knew she'd seen the look on his face when he saw Kimberly's image. I'm sorry, Kat, he thought, touching the pouch that still hung beneath his shirt, felt the shape of the ring still inside. I still love Kimberly. I always will love Kimberly. She is my soul-mate. One day, we'll be together again. I didn't want to hurt you...
I want to lay you down on a bed of roses
For tonight, I sleep on a bed of nails
I want to be just as close as
The Holy Ghost is
and lay you down
on a bed of roses
"Kim."
"Tommy." She looked up as he sat across from her in the juice bar. "It's been a long time since I've been back here," she commented, looking around. "Not much has changed, has it?"
"I'd say some fundamental changes have happened."
"Yeah. No Ernie." She idly stirred her smoothie. "Lieutenant Stone doesn't make as good a smoothie as Ernie did."
"No, he doesn't." Tommy looked at her. It seemed as if almost no time had passed since they'd said goodbye and she'd left for Florida. But at the same time...eons had passed.
"Tommy...do you ever think about...the old days?"
He grinned. "We're only seventeen. We can't lay claim to 'old days' yet."
"You know what I mean."
"Yeah, I do. Think about the 'old days,' that is. A lot. More now than I used to, really."
"Oh?"
"Look at the team. None of the original five are there any more. Jason's trekking around Europe, Trini's doing research in China, and Zack...well, no one really knows where Zack is now. Billy's off on Aquitar, and you're in Florida. Then of the the next three, Rocky's getting PT, Aisha's off in Africa, and Adam's the only one still here. And I don't know how much longer any of us, except Justin, are going to stick around."
"What do you mean? You're going to give it up?"
"We're heading up on graduation awfully fast. We're going to be scattered across the globe."
"Wow." Kim rested her chin in her hands. "It's going to be weird, not knowing who the Rangers are anymore."
"I know. I figure after graduation, we're going to start searching for replacements, and pass the powers to them. Then it's bye-bye monsters, hello normalcy."
"Normal is over-rated."
"How would you know? Your life isn't exactly normal." He poked her arm. "Ranked third in the world for elite female gymnasts."
"True." She sipped a bit of her smoothie, grimaced, and pushed it aside. "So what are you and Kat planning for after graduation?"
"She's going to London."
"Wow. You'll love England."
"I'm not going."
"But I thought..."
"So did she." He slipped the leather thong that held the pouch over his head. "Remember this?"
"Yeah." She watched as he emptied the contents into his hand, and lined them up on the table.
A jade dragon. An alabaster tiger. A quartz falcon. A carnelian star. A gold I Ching coin. A wooden strength rune. Half an arrowhead. A turquoise trickster. A silver ring, with a clear pink stone surrounded by small green stones.
"You've added to it. This is new." She picked up the carnelian star, tracing the five points.
"And you've never seen this." He held up the ring. "I've had it in the pouch since sophomore year, though." Kim watched as he turned the ring over in his hands. "It was a promise ring, that I bought as a promise to myself, and planned to give as a promise to someone I loved. I never got the chance, but I kept the ring as a reminder."
"Oh."
"How are you and Brian?"
"Hmm? Oh. Well...this is sort of embarrasing." She blushed lightly. "We were never really dating. He was just a good friend. But I thought that you and Kat were...so I made it up."
"Really." Tommy kept turning the ring over, letting the facets of the pink stone catch the light and refract, causing a play of rainbow light on the table. He reached over and took Kim's left hand, sliding the ring onto her fourth finger.
"Tommy..."
"Wait, Kim. Before you say anything, let me finish. This ring is a promise, from me to you. A promise that I'll always be there for you, that you'll always have my love, whatever happens. If you want it to be romantic love, let it stay on that hand. If you want it to be friendly love, change it to your right hand. Either way, that ring is for you, and it always has been."
"If you'd let me finish." Kim leaned across the table and kissed Tommy. "I accept your promise of love. I never stopped loving you. And you'd better keep that promise."
"I've waited too long to give it to you; I'm damn well going to keep it." He climbed over the table to sit next to her and kiss her again, finally feeling happy again.