I Loved You First

by Tovaras

Who was Ezio's greatest support during his time as an Assassin? Who was it that was always there, helping him despite that it went against his own believes? Who loved Ezio first?

I Loved You First:

Assassin's Creed II/Brotherhood/Revelation

Pairing: Ezio/Leonardo

Summary: Who was it that truly loved Ezio first?

AN: Because I can.

xoxoxox

Even with his old bones aching and his joins stiffening, Leonardo still found the strength to carefully flip his fingers through the old bundle of papers. Drawings, written words, poems, letters. Everything that he had carefully gathered in this bundle was part of a secret life, a life that he could not look back on. Bad memories wrapped with the sweetest time of his life when he first tasted love.

"Maestro, are you okay?"

Leonardo lifted his head, old eyes straining to take in the young man who took his seat next to him on the sofa, his young, strong hand grasping his own, wrinkled one.

"I am fine, Francesco. Just looking through some old, forgotten words and works."

Melzi peered at the papers before squeezing the hand again. "Him?"

Leonardo nodded. "Him."

You are my sweetest downfall
I loved you first, I loved you first
Beneath the sheets of paper lies my truth
I have to go, I have to go
Your hair was long when we first met

Leonardo would never forget the time when he had first met the young Auditore and the instant attraction he had felt towards him. While young, the man was still a child for heaven's sake, the face was handsome, the body strong, the eyes burning with young passion, the long, brown hair tied behind his head in a neat ponytail.

He wanted to drop everything he had in his hands and just sketch him right there and then, and it was only because he remembered that his mother was there that he managed to stop himself from asking for him to model for him.

The charming smile, the lively eyes, the merry expression on his face… The sight from that day would burn itself into Leonardo's memory and a good thing it was too.

All too soon, it would be lost.

Samson went back to bed
Not much hair left on his head
Ate a slice of wonder bread
And went right back to bed
And the history books forgot about us
And the bible didn't mention us
And the bible didn't mention us
Not even once

The young artist felt his heart break as he found himself with his arms around Ezio, holding him close as he felt the young man tremble, suppressing his tears. He didn't have to hear it from him to know what had happened. He hadn't been there himself, not able to watch as the family was hanged. When he had found out that Ezio was still alive, it was a relief to him. The relief was quickly replaced with sorrow as he comforted the young man, listening to the gasps for air as he suppressed his tears.

Leonardo had let him sleep in his bed that night, laying next to him and holding him as he tried to soothe the silent shudders, whipping away tears from his cheek. He himself didn't sleep a wink.

The artist felt himself become more attached to the man that night and when morning came, he told him that he would always be welcome with him, no matter what. He had decided that no matter what, he would be there for the young man and help him with the burden he was now carrying. The young Auditore thanked him and left, returning to a brothel he had sought refuge in before he came to Leonardo the day before.

Leonardo did not know how heavy that burden would become though, not before the man returned a few days later, presenting to him an old codex of sort as well as a broken blade.

It would mark the end of the young Auditore's innocence, his carefree days, and the mark of a new era and a new path. One that was stained in blood.

Leonardo could almost see the poetic in it, after Ezio had saved him from a guard who was trying to kick an answer out of the artist. The white outfit stained with red blood. Innocence slowly being dirtied with reality.

Ezio said that he would understand if Leonardo would take no part in his plans for revenge, but Leonardo had silenced him, repeating his words from the other night.

He would always be welcome with him.

The artist had started to love Ezio that day because as it was, no-one else was, except from his remaining family who he could not be with.

You are my sweetest downfall
I loved you first, I loved you first
Beneath the stars came falling on our heads
But they're just old light, they're just old light
Your hair was long when we first met

The first time Ezio kissed Leonardo was in Venice, seven years after their first meeting. It had come out of nowhere after they had shared a bottle of fine wine together, laughing and just in general relaxing together out on a garden on a rooftop near Leonardo's workshop.

Ezio had, with ease, brought them both up there, though later got a ladder so Leonardo could come up there whenever he wanted. His secret spot, he said. A spot where he was shielded from the guards' eyes and could just sit and catch his breath for a moment.

He confessed that he would sometimes sit there and watch the lights from Leonardo's studio, making sure that the artist was safe when the assassin could not come to spend the night on his couch or bed.

Leonardo was honoured that he shared it with him.

They sat there together, just talking and drinking. Leonardo was not one for drinking much and soon felt the pleasant buzz from the alcohol, making his mood rise further.

So when Ezio kissed him, his first reaction was to kiss back. His second was to pull back and stare at his friend, eyes wide and mouth open.

The assassin didn't say anything. He just stared back, hand slowly reaching out and caressing Leonardo's cheek. Leonardo didn't pull away.

They remained like that, eyes locked together, neither wanting to break whatever it was that was happening between them. Vibrant blue meeting golden amber. It was forbidden, it was dangerous.

It was beautiful.

It was safety, created and protected over years. It was trust, built from scratch and strengthened with bonds of friendship, respect and care over many many years.

It was home.

"Stop me…" Ezio's voice was no more than a whisper, his breathing louder than the words themselves had been.

The artist shook his head and reached to cup Ezio's cheek, feeling the slight scruff against his fingers and palm. "I don't want you to stop."

And they didn't.
At least not their kisses.

Samson came to my bed
Told me that my hair was red
Told me I was beautiful and
Came into my bed

The first time they had shared a bed together, had been mere days after they met, when Ezio had lost his father and brothers.

The first time they laid together though, was the day before Ezio would leave to join Caterina Sforza in Romagna, to hide the Apple of Eden in her fortress in Forlì.

Leonardo had seen the apple for the first time that very night and after a very dazzling experience with it, his senses assaulted with impossible designs, numbers and the light… God, the light. His mind was overflowing with ideas, inspiration and he felt a desire to create like he had never before.

Like before, the Auditore had brought him something to truly sink his teeth into, something challenging. The last thing he had been able to do for him had been the small firearm he created, a truly enjoyable challenge even if it was a weapon of destruction.

Ezio had refused to leave Leonardo's side that evening, wanting to spend one last night with his love. Leonardo couldn't agree more, he knew that Ezio had to leave and even with Mario's offer for Leonardo to come stay in his villa, he had no idea when he would see Ezio again.

The artist had been hesitant at first, when Ezio's warm, roughed fingertips slipped under his nightgown and caressed his side. He knew how awkward it could be, having sexual intercourse with another man, especially when one had spent their lives seducing women as Ezio had.

Resistance had soon transformed into submission as the assassin's skilled fingers seemed to find all his spots, reducing him into a mere animal, driven by lust, need and want. It was like they had known each other's bodies all their lives, the way they moved together, fit together… Like two missing pieces of an intricate puzzle that had finally been brought together, much like the codex Leonardo had been translating.

When morning came, Ezio would be gone, but not without leaving a piece of himself with the artist.

A small note fastened to a very familiar looking wooden doll.

On the note, a simple sentence was written, though for Leonardo, it meant the world.

'Ti amo, mio amato. I will return to you.'

It would be the first of many letters that they would send to one another.

Oh I cut his hair myself one night
A pair of dull scissors in the yellow light
And he told me that I'd done alright
And kissed me till the morning light
The morning light
And kissed me till the morning light

The day they separated would be the first day in Leonardo's life where he was willing to let Ezio go.

It was not because of lack of love, of lack of respect or because of a fight.

It was because of too much love, too much fear for one another and a respect for one another's differences.

Oh, they knew the fear would not stop. It never would stop. Leonardo would forever sit and wonder if Ezio was alright or if the feared "assassino" had finally been caught.

Just like Ezio would forever wonder if the artist was alright, if someone like the Borgia or Ercole Massimo had caught him and was trying to exploit his knowledge again.

They also knew that their love would never stop. They would always love one another, as family, brothers even.

The aches and hurt from loosing a lover would be soothed by time and truth; they would not loose one another. They would always be there, in one way or the other.

For while Leonardo wished nothing more than to remain by Ezio's side, he also didn't want to take part in the Creed anymore. He told him, honestly, that he had his own visions and wished to pursuit them the best he could. A path of solidarity, he said. He also believed that he had nothing more to give to the brotherhood, at least not at the time.

Just as Ezio could not abandon the Creed for his sake, the artists desire for a quiet life that the assassin could never share. Not anymore. Not after so many years.

Ezio understood, though the sorrow was clean in his eyes. On both of their faces. But age had made them both wise and they both knew that this… This was for the best. For the both of them.

They embraced each other for the last time that night, making the most of it as they could. During the night, they shared a bed for the last time, their lovemaking as intense, as passionate as it had when they were younger.

When the sun rose the next day, they would share their last kiss. It was bittersweet, a kiss that they tried to make last as long as possible so they could remember it.

Before the sun had reached the middle of the sky, Leonardo had left for Milan and Ezio remained in Rome, continuing to build the Creed and expanding it.

It would be the last time they would see each other.

Samson went back to bed
Not much hair left on his head
Ate a slice of wonder bread
And went right back to bed
Oh we couldn't bring the columns down
Yeah we couldn't destroy a single one
And the history books forgot about us
And the bible didn't mention us
Not even once

Leonardo smiled some, a tear having gathered at the corner of his eye as he read the very last note in the bundle, the last one that Ezio had sent him. It was a birthday greeting, wishing him a happy sixty-sixth birthday as well as a small letter telling him how Ezio was doing. That had been almost half a year ago.

"Maestro?"

Leonardo closed his eyes as he felt the soft, gentle hand of his beloved Melzi dry away the tear. "I am fine, Francesco… I am fine. I am merely reliving the past for a moment."

Melzi nodded some, and then discreetly, tenderly, leaned over to press a gentle kiss to Leonardo's cheek. "Do you wish to be alone with your thoughts, Maestro?"

The old artist shook his head and looked at Melzi. "No, Francesco… In fact, I need you to do something for me."

"Anything, Leonardo."

The bundle was handed out, the hand holding it shaking ever so slightly. "Burn it."

Melzi blinked. "… Maestro? Are you-?" He didn't finish the sentence, seeing the steely resolve in the artist's eyes.

"I am certain, Francesco. This here… It has kept me warm during lonely nights, soothed my aches and pains. But I do not need it anymore. Everything there is in my head, in my heart and there it will remain until the day I die. But this… This is not meant for anyone else's eyes."

Ezio had built himself a grand legacy, though a hidden one. He would be one of the greatest legends in history if it was ever found out. But this… This was not meant for history. This was private.

A link would forever be between them and Leonardo would be blessed and satisfied as long as that link would be recognised as the strong bond it was between them. A bond as strong as between brothers. That they were more, that was for their own hearts to know.

Melzi hesitantly took the papers from Leonardo's hand and brought them to the fireplace. One last glance at the artist was made before he tossed them into the fire, watching as the papers crumbled and burned until they were gone, reduced to ash.

Leonardo inhaled deeply and closed his eyes, almost breathing in the memories that came from the smoke.

"Thank you, Francesco…"

Melzi returned to the artist's side, gently grasping his hand and squeezing it. "Anything else I can do for you, Leonardo?" he whispered, lifting his other hand and gently cupping Leonardo's cheek.

The artist smiled softly. "That will be all for now… I need a moment alone."

Melzi nodded and got up, quietly leaving the room and the artist behind so he could have his moment.

Leonardo remained where he was, listening to the fire's cracks and pops as it continued to eat its way through the firewood.

Even with the papers gone, his memories would never leave him.

He was proud having known and aided Ezio in his quests, proud to have been at the side of one of the greatest men in Italy. He had been there from the start and while he had not seen the finish just yet, he knew. Ezio would manage, he always had. He was strong, proud and had the wisdom to manage himself and the Creed for the time to come.

Leonardo smiled, opening his blue eyes and watched as the fire burned.

He had truly experienced a lot in his lifetime, seen miracles, places, met people he didn't imagine he ever would. His life had been everything but quiet, no matter what he had expected of himself. He had been a part of changing the world, even if it had been from the sideline and in all honesty… He preferred it that way.

Just as he preferred that when it came to the assassin… He had been the first to love him, even when knowing everything he was.

And he had never stopped.

You are my sweetest downfall
I loved you first