A/N: There was a project in my English class where we had to rewrite three parts in the play, or insert a missing scene. Everyone was basically doing the "Why the hell are the Capels/Montagues fighting idea" but people mostly were writing about an affair or other lamosities. Thus, my idea was spawned. A little lame, and not to be taken seriously. Also, by the way, this is not meant as an insult to Shakespeare.
Romeo & Juliet
Missing Scene: The Truth Behind the Brawl
It was a fine day in Verona. There was a gathering at Prince Escalus' manor and all the Lords of high class were in attendance. Among these were Lord Capulet, Lord Montague, and their wives. Never were closer friends then Capulet and Montague, until this fateful day.
Prince Escalus led his visitors to his garden. There they had their meal, and there much chatter and laughter. Towards the conclusion of his party, Prince Escalus stood, addressing his people.
"Come good friends; let us make a toast to our good health!" Prince Escalus exclaimed, raising his glass high.
His guests followed his gesture, and sipped their wine merrily. Somewhere among the festivity, a pillar, standing in the garden, was elbowed down. Causing a domino like effect, they began to topple, and much chaos ensued. Lady Capulet, still clutching her wine glass, tried to flee, but was trapped between people, hedges, and decorative sculptures adorning every surface. She heard a crash above her. Looking up, she was horrified to see the final pillar toppling down on her.
Screaming, Lady Capulet bowed her head, waiting for the sickening crunch, but was taken aback when she felt herself flung to the side of the garden. Behind her the pillar shattered into millions of pieces.
Above her, Lord Montague stood, reaching out his hands to help the shaken Lady to her feet. Around them, people were wandering back to the center of the garden, abandoning their makeshift hiding spots behind various fountains and bushes.
"Lady, Lady, art thou all right?" Lord Capulet shoved through the crowd, nearly tripping over a dismembered lawn gnome.
But Lady Capulet was too stunned to speak. She raised her hands to her chest, where a red stain was slowly sinking into the fine silk of her dress. Horrified, she raised her head.
"How dare you!" She spat furiously at Lord Montague. Walking forward, her heels crushed the broken remains of her wine glass.
Lord Montague was taken aback, not expecting this kind of reaction to saving her life. He quickly shifted to the side as Lady Capulet ran to her husband, sobbing. Turning around, Lord Montague tried to catch his friend's eye, wondering what in the world was going on.
"Lady, are you hurt?" Lord Montague asked, concerned by the red now spreading to her skirt.
Lady Capulet just wailed even louder, pulled out her handkerchief and began to mop furiously at her dress.
"No, I'm not hurt; you fool, but look at my dress! The color shall never be the same again!" Abandoning her attempt to clean it, Lady Capulet threw down her handkerchief, and buried her face in her hands.
Lord Montague was immensely relieved; he did not like to think of what Capulet would have done if his wife had been injured on his account. All this fuss over a wine stain! He looked at the blubbering woman, shaking his head, and let out a small chuckle. Lord Capulet looked up, fury emanating from his face. The crowd around them began to whisper to themselves.
"You dare to laugh, after the harm you have inflicted on my lady?" Striding around his wife, Capulet stopped inches from Montague's face.
Montague stepped back uneasily, "Good Montague, 'tis only a wine stain…what is one dress; had I not pushed her from harm's way, that pillar would have crushed her flat!"
"So you do admit to pushing her?" Lord Capulet unsheathed his sword, brandishing it towards Montague threateningly.
Montague dodged the blade, horrified at his friend's actions. "I saved her life, what is this repayment? A cruel joke of some sort, please tell me."
"Do not make light of this Montague! Do not cover your offenses with false heroics!" Capulet slashed wildly, closing in the space between the two lords.
Montague, drawn into a corner, finally unsheathed his sword, parrying against the blows to his head.
"What madness has come over you? Have you taken leave of your senses?"
"And now you insult my intelligence! Death be upon you, foul Montague!"
The men vaulted over hedges and flowers, smashing whatever the previous commotion had not. Prince Escalus' guests watched with awe, cheering when they found it necessary. Lady Montague finally appeared at Lady Capulet's side, appalled at the behavior of their lords.
"Please, cannot you stop this lunacy? What has possessed their wits? If this does not stop, someone shall certainly be killed!"
Scoffing at her former friend, Lady Capulet raised her eyes in disdain, "Whatever befalls your lord is only fitting for the harm he has undone upon me."
"I feel your pain, friend, but surely you mustn't think my Lord's life a proper trade for your dress!"
"Twas custom made!"
"Surely you jest? From where?
"Milan."
"The colors suit you well, and such intricate design!"
"Yes, I know. But 'tis ruined thanks to your wretch of a husband!"
SMACK.
The on looking crowd gasped, even Montague and Capulet ceased trying to skewer each other, turning their attention onto the two seething women.Lady Capulet clutched at her now stinging cheek, appalled at Lady Montague who was now rubbing her palms.
"I do hope you did not just raise your hand against me."
"I daresay, I think I did."
Crying out, Lady Capulet seized a rake from an unsuspecting gardener, hurling herself at Lady Montague. With uncharacteristic agility, Lady Montague sprinted to the nearest fountain, and wrenched off one of the metal spires. Water began to rain down onto the guests, as the two pairs began to fight. Dodging flowers, thorns, and other items of a botanical nature, Prince Escalus clambered onto a nearby table.
"STOP!" He shouted, with such commandment that the affected parties froze in their tracks. Laying down their weapons, garden tools, and fountain fragments, the Capulets and Montagues held up their hands in surrender.
"You dare fight in my own home? Look at the disarray you've originated! How can you explain yourself? Montague? Capulet?"
The two men looked to the ground in shame.
"And look at you ladies, reduced to senseless violence!"
Lady Capulet and Lady Montague averted their eyes from their superior.
"Henceforth, all of you are barred from further attendance to any of my gatherings! And you shall split the costs of repairing my garden. It shall not be a menial sum either! It was designed by a French architect!"
Aghast, Montague and Capulet begged for forgiveness.
"Please, your highness, forgive our foolishness. None shall happen a second time!"
"Cease your blubbering and take your punishment as men! Get from my sight! Guards!"
Snapping his fingers, Prince Escalus motioned to the four armed men who suddenly appeared at the two couples. Lifting them up, they were thrown quite forcefully outside the gates. Standing up in a huff, Montague turned to Capulet angrily.
"See what you have done now?"
"What I have done? Twas you who began this fight!"
Turning indignantly, Montague grabbed his wife and began to head back to his manor. Briefly swiveling to face Capulet, he exclaimed furiously,
"A scourge upon all Capulets and your descendants from this time forth!"
"Then, I wish a pox on all who bear the name Montague!"
And they all swore to hate each other for all eternity.
Thus, their epic feud was born.