Cigarette Prayer
She loved him.
She loved him more than life itself.
She loved him more than her duty, her oaths, and even her pride.
She loved him all the more the day he died.
This children would chant this for years to come, and Kurenai would be powerless to stop it. A small part of her heart warned her not to. It was as if, somehow, in their little sing-song voices, his legacy lived onward.
Cigarettes upon the gravestone dirtied his name with ash. It was warm to the touch, soft like dust, fresh enough to pierce her nose with the scent of burnt tobacco. She herself was not a smoker. She refused to ever be one, knowing it was bad for her health. She missed it, that billow of smoke between his words, and that grin he wore while doing it.
She kept a pack on her, held always near her heart. Pulling one out, she lit it and it put it on the grave, sighing deeply as closed her eyes and clasped her hands together.
"Asuma, I love you…but, if anything, I know that the man I loved was a complete and total idiot. You knew better, Asuma. You knew, and you went, so damn you anyway. That was just the kind of man you were, and it was the reason why I loved you...why I still love you. I had been hoping that our daughter would be a simple kunoichi, that she would learn the skills needed to survive. That she would settle down young, find a simple man…and stay safe."
Kurenai swallowed hard, licked her lips, and stifled the tears before they could fall.
"I wished for her to be everything that I was not. I had been hoping that I could raise her to be wise enough to see the truth. That fighting is not a way of life, neither against herself, or the world. Strangely, she is your daughter, Asuma. Restless and full of wonder, she's a free spirit. I can't hold her down, and she hasn't grown out of it. Maybe you're laughing from where you are now, I wouldn't put it past you."
Clearing her throat she mumbled a curse and sighed.
"Watch her, Azuma, keep her safe. As her father, you owe her that much. Don't let her get hurt."
As she slowly began to stand, she wondered if her words would truly reach him. She wondered if all this time, he really had been watching over them. She'd had enough experiences in her life to believe so, to keep faith in the old teachings of her own childhood. Without thinking too deeply on the matter, she began to scale the buildings and rock formations one by one, until she reached the top of a particularly large summit.
There, walking along the path skipped her daughter and her fellow teammates. They were off to another mission, off to their future where ever it may take them. Once again, she would wait, left behind by a loved one.