A/N: Disclaimer! Please Read!

Hello everyone I would just like to take this moment to get some things out of the way. For starters I do not own Hey Arnold; all rights go to the creator of the series Craig Bartlett. Second this is story inspired by and based on upon a book called Breathing Underwater. The novel is by Alex Flinn and she is absolutely amazing. I love her work so be sure to go and read the novel. I am not trying to plagiarize her work but just bring the subject matter to the forefront. There is also a companion book to Breathing Underwater called Diva, which is told from the ex-girlfriend's perspective after she broke up her boyfriend. Alex Flinn has written several other books that I absolutely love for their controversial subject matter. If you don't want to read these types of books I would just like to say that Alex Flinn is also the author of the book Beastly, which is now a major motion picture staring Vanessa Hudgens. She has also written at least three more books with the fairy tale theme, so again be sure to check her out. Now on with the story.

July 14th

The beer can makes a loud clamor as it hits the asphalt. I crack open another one and gulp down half of it before releasing a loud obnoxious belch. What beer am I on? Eight? Nine? I don't care really, I'm already plastered.

"COME OUT HERE AND TALK TO ME YOU DUMB BITCH!"

I stagger towards her front door, my car no longer supporting me. I don't care if I wake up the whole block; she is going to talk to me.

"PLEASE! I'M SORRY! IS THAT WHAT YOU WANT TO HEAR?!" I finish my beer and throw it at the door. "WELL FUCK YOU THEN BITCH! YOU AIN'T SHIT WITHOUT ME!" I continue to try to force my way inside. "I love you!"

I stalk back to my car and try to tear another beer off of my six-pack. Come to Daddy,

Flashing blue and red lights illuminate the empty street. How come they never show up when you need them? Two officers get out of their car, one walks towards me, the other towards her house.

"Sir, is everything okay over here?" He flashes a white light it my face. I shield my eyes.

"No, make that bitch open the door!" I slurr. He looks over at his partner who was now talking to her parents.

"Sir we received a complaint that you are disturbing the peace. Have you been drinking tonight?"

"No, I've been writing poetry. The hell you think I've been doing?" I pour the beer down my throat. Ten! I throw the empty can at his feet. "Now make her talk to me! I got to tell her I'm sorry."

"Alright son, I'm going to have to take you in," As he guides me to the squad car I see a glimpse of her. She is hiding behind her father but I see her.

"Girl, why you doing this to me? Come on let's just talk," I stumble closer to her. The fear in her eyes is evident as the officers restrain me. The cuffs bite into my skin. "This is your damn fault! Everything that happens is your fault!" She shakes her head as the officer drags me to the squad car.

"You have the right to remain silent."

"You have the right to remain silent,"

"You have the right to an attorney."

"You have the right to suck my dick!"

She is crying. She doesn't want me to go! She loves me. The loud thumping of my heart fills my ears. Fuck this man; I need to be with my girl. The cop continues to ramble on as I fight to see my beloved.

"I LOVE YOU! YOU FUCKING BITCH! I LOVE YOU!" The door slams in my face. I kick at the windows and try to break free of my restraints. I'm gonna kill that bitch for doing this to me. Got me out here acting a damn fool! She knows I love her, why I got to go through this to prove it? The officers enter the car a short time later.

"Will you keep it down back there? We are going to take you to holding and call your parents," says the officer who had talked to her parents.

"That's my girl you took away from me." We were all quiet for a beat. "Hey pull over, I'm gonna hurl." Black spots dot my eyes as I empty my stomach. I laugh at their shouts of disgust, before passing out on the seat.

August 17th

I watch her closely as she enters the court room. She isn't late, I am early.

"Punctuality Gerald, that is always important. Remember if you're early you're on time, if you're on time you're late, and if you're late you might as well admit you are a failure." My father had lectured me as we left the house this morning. I am always early.

She won't look at me as she follows her parents to the other side of the court room. Why won't she look at me? She sits close to the aisle. Please look at me! Please! I feel like I am staring a hole into her head. Why are you doing this to me? It's not that serious! We can work this out.

"Eyes forward Gerald. You have already made a mistake, no need to make it worse." I turn my attention to the witness stand. I can feel her parent's eyes on me; I know they wish I was dead. Part of me wishes the same. I concentrate on my alter ego, the Gerald that everyone knows and loves. All my ex-friends, even Arnold, who isn't my best friend anymore, they saw what I wanted them to see. The Gerald who is the life of the party, the keeper of urban legends, boxer, and all around cool guy. Lies, all lies. I glance at her through my peripheral vision. She has cut her hair into a pixie style; it looks nice on her. Dress seems a little short though, who is she trying to impress? Me? Only she knew the truth about me, about my family. The only one I allowed to get close enough, not even Arnold could be trusted. He would just try to fix everything. How did we get here baby?

It was easier to lie to my friends. They all turned their backs on me in a heartbeat anyway, so I knew I had made the right choice. That's why I knew I could lie my way out of this mess. After seventeen years of lying, deception had become second nature. I'm surprised to see a male judge enter.

Maybe he will take my side,

I watch as the bailiff swears her in on the witness stand.

"I love you," I mouth. She doesn't notice. I try my hardest to appear ashamed. The key to deception is appearing innocent, and I can be one hell of an angel. A lawyer in a pinstripe suit begins to ask her questions.

"Please state your name for the record,"

"Phoebe Heyerdahl," Her adorable voice is barely above a whisper.

"In my hands I have the testimony you gave police on the morning of July 15th. At this time would you like to recant your statement?"

She pauses. "No,"

"Do you testify that you were involved in a relationship with the respondent Gerald Martin Johanssen?"

"Yes,"

"Is he here today?"

"Yes,"

"Please point him out,"

I hear her swallow before she stretches out her slender pale finger. I wonder if she is wearing that nail polish I bought her.

Our eyes meet. Remember Phoebe; remember all the good times we had. Our connection is brief.

"Alright Phoebe could you please discuss the relationship you had with Mr. Johanssen?"

"He's my boyfriend," I feel a smile tug at the corner of my lips. "He's my ex-boyfriend."

"How long were you two dating?"

"Not too long…six, maybe seven months." Six months and three weeks. Hell, we've been friends since we were in preschool! Why couldn't she remember that?

"Was your relationship sexual?"

"…Yes," Why is she hesitating? "It was consensual too. He never…he never raped me." I would never hurt you Phoebe! Why are you doing this to me? You know I love you! Mrs. Heyerdahl tries to quiet her sniffles.

"What happened on March 14th?"

"He…" She exhales slowly. "He hit me." Phoebe bites her lip, and I can see her trying to hold back tears. "He hit me, and he was abusing me throughout our whole relationship."

I look up at the judge. He's a man. He won't be sympathetic to her sob story. He will see it's just this big misunderstanding.

"Why are you just now requesting for an order of protection?" Beetle Juice could go back to hell for all I cared.

"After we broke up he began stalking me. That's why my father called the police and had him arrested."

If looks could kill my father would have done it twenty times over by now. I was only in holding, the drunk tank really. Something about his glare was quite sobering.

I can no longer hear her words after that. Her mouth is moving but she sounds like the adults on Charlie Brown. My father puts his giant paw of a hand on my shoulder. To an outsider it looks like an act of comfort, don't worry son, it's going to be okay. He's squeezing me so hard I feel like my arm will pop out of its socket.

"Are you in immediate fear for your safety?"

"Yes, I am scared he will try to hurt me again."

The judge says she can step down. Phoebe collapses into her mother's waiting arms.

"Mr. Johanssen would you like to come up and testify? Your testimony is unnecessary and would only serve to proof of your character." Before I know it my butt hits the witness stand.

I can see the vein in my Dad's head throbbing.

"Don't admit to anything. Deny it all. Do you understand me?" He had growled at me during the car ride. "They will see this is nothing more than some childish disagreement."

I'm sworn in. Is it still perjury if you swear on a book you don't believe in?

"Mr. Johansson, you may speak," Judge Banks looks down at me.

"I would never hurt Phoebe! I love her!" I look right at her, hoping she could see how much I care. Her eyes stay glued to the floor. "This thing is getting blown way out of proportion. I mean it was just a slap when she pushed me way too far. I didn't even bruise her."

"So you admit that you assaulted her on the day of March 14th of this year?"

"I didn't assault her! It was an accident! I would never hurt her on purpose. Phoebe knows that. She's my whole world! I would do anything to protect her. Why are we making this into a big thing?"

"Because Mr. Johanssen, this is a serious matter. From both testimonies, and the evidence provided by the emergency room physicians, I am granting the order of protection."

"What? No! You can't do that! You can't keep us apart! We love each other! Phoebe please tell them this is all a mistake! That you don't mean any of this! That we love each other! Tell them!" Phoebe is sobbing in her mother's arms, afraid to answer me.

"Mr. Johanssen please be quiet! One more outburst like that and I will hold you in contempt. It is clear that this is not a healthy relationship and the order of protection will be put in place immediately for up to one year. In addition to that I am requiring that Mr. Johanssen begin a six month outpatient therapy program, to help him understand the seriousness of his actions." The judge turns to me and I want to knock that smirk off of his face.

"You still don't think you've done anything wrong do you son?"

Son? Son? I can feel my fist clenching.

"You said it not me,"

"Listen here boy; I can't stand young men like you."

"Well then allow me the honor of leaving your courtroom." I stand up.

"Sit down Gerald." I sit. Now we're on a first name basis Judge?

"You men think that you can just push around your girlfriends just because you are angry. The world doesn't owe you anything, and there is no reason for you to take your frustrations out on someone you supposedly love." My eyes cut to my father. Hear that Dad, maybe listen to something he's saying. His eyes are on fire. He doesn't care what the judge is saying. I've already fucked up. I wonder what my punishment will be this time.

"In addition to your therapy I am requiring that you keep a journal documenting your relationship. It will need to be five hundred words minimum each week. You will turn it into your therapist each week for approval. After your rehabilitation you will submit it to me. I won't read it unless you want me to. I just want to know your version of events leading up to this day. It can be the truth, but if you want to lie that's fine too. I don't mind reading a fairy tale. Hopefully after nine months you will see where you went wrong and learn from your mistakes."

A fucking journal? Who does he think I am? I'm not going to do that!

"My work will rival that of Hemmingway sir."

"Sarcasm is not an admirable quality son. If you violate any of this court's rulings I will throw your butt in jail so fast your head will spin."

Jail? Like real jail? I feel my throat going dry. I've heard what they do to people in jail if they were convicted of hitting a woman. The only people who get it worse are pedophiles and rapists.

"You're lucky son. Next year you will be eighteen. If this happens again you might not get off so easy. Court is adjourned." He bangs his gavel.

I punch the wall next to the witness stand. Why couldn't that be his face? The bailiff makes his way towards me but I just head for the exit. "I'm going, I'm going," My fist hurts, but I was still able to uncurl my fingers. I can't afford a broken hand.

I don't see Phoebe as my father and I leave the courthouse. Probably for the best since I'm not allowed to be around her anymore.

"You just had to go an open your big fat mouth huh Gerald?" I look him in the eye. Never look away. Averting your eyes is a sign of weakness, an admission of guilt. He reaches his hand towards me and I flinch. Calm down he's just buckling his seatbelt. "Why can't you just do as you're told? You always mess up and make mistakes. Why is that Gerald?"

We stop at a traffic light. "Maybe it's my upbringing?" My head hits the window.

"No one like a smartass Gerald," Remember, silence is golden.

I watch the road.