If anything, it was just the fact that he had a bunch of Pidgeys chasing after him that actually sparked something within him. Not the fact that Nora just ate the whole new supply of pancakes that the school just ordered - which honestly, isn't surpirsing
Not the fact that he found out Blake was secretly a cat...because she liked fish all too much.
Hey!
He might've been oblivious, but even he could see details that were well hidden.
And he just called himself oblivious...
Great.
As if he didn't insult him enough every single day.
Point is, he only got surpised when he found a bunch of his old childhood memories rushing at him in a flurry of feathers and loud squawking noises.
He'd also been pecked a lot.
Not that kind of peck!
The one that actually hurts.
So, he found himself running at a Ruby-like pace away from a giant flock of birds - and while this would probably be any kids dream...okay, it was his dream too.
In truth, he was running to find something to catch them with, pokèballs would be nice, ultra balls would be even better since he didn't have anything on him.
Now he just had to think how the hell he would find something like that.
Think, Jaune, think.
Oh!
Cardin probably has some!
(With the burd)
"Cardin! Can I have a pokèball?" he called out to said burd.
The hunk of a man took one look at him and nodded sagely, before biting his lip and forcing one out of his butt.
"Bye-bye-go-go!" he yelled as he sprinted off.
He stared off into the narrow hall, "I think he's from 'noda country."
(Going back to real burds.)
He jumped back out into the open, making himself vulnerable to the burds around him, "A traina' Numba' Juan me!" he yelled as he threw his one ball into the large crowd.
...
...
...
He heard something click, and shouted incoherently as he rushed into the flock of burds, shielding his eyes from the sharp objects attached to the burds' heads and feet.
"Go...uh...buttsex!" he yelled as he threw the pokèball out.
"AUAHAHDIDKDNEHH" it cried as it flew into a tree.
"You did good buttsex! Now return! You deserve a nice long rest!" he picked his nose and scratched his butt.
"Heh!" someone smirked as he crashed into the mountain that just so happened to be in the way.
"I GOT A POKÈMON TO MAKE UP FOR MY LACK OF PARENTAL AFFECTION!" he shouted as he let out a magikarp.
"EXPLOSION!"
He heard a loud boom echo across the bathroom stall, and looked under the wall to see someone constipated, forcing a rock out while trying to catch an Abra.
"SAVE MY FAMILY!" someone commanded.
"Okay!" he yelled back, getting up and stretching out a bit.
He threw his pokéball at the mirror and sent out Pidgey.
"JEJDJSMSMDJIDJD." it cried as it got pierced through the heart by a glass shard.
"Good job Buttsex! Now we can face the pokèmon league!" Jaune stated defiantly.
(At the pokèmon team rocket place."
"I CHALLENGE YOU LANCE!" Jaune said as he threw the Pidgey at his face, causing him to die of blunt force trauma.
"I won!" he cheered.
He saw Pidgey leap out of it's pokèball and faint because it stood too hard.
"You did awesome!"
And then the Pidgey ate a rare candy and evolved into magikarp, and Jaune became Yang's uncle.
AN:
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I'm sorry, I just needed a way to get myself out of writer's block, and this suddenly made me motivated to write.