James' thoughts

Danni's thoughts

Yeah...In case you didn't read my profile, I'm the same person as Two-Bits. This is my penname for my Harry Potter stories. So, don't flame me for plagerism or whatever.

Love, much!

"Danni?"

"Yes, James?"

"I feel a sudden inspiration coming on..."

We gazed in awe at the wonderful, amazing creation that is Wal-Mart. Danni gave me a sideways glance, a questioning glance, but I replied merely with a wicked grin.

It was time to have some fun.

"THE BILLYS ARE COMING, THE BILLYS ARE COMING!" I shrieked, as some poor, unsuspecting shopper tried to duck into the Peanut Butter aisle. Danni and I had commandeered it, in honor of our favorite little guitarist (besides moi, of course), Billy Martin, from Good Charlotte: fellow guitarist and Peanut Butter obsessionaire.

"James, we need spoons!" Danni gasped, suddenly. She was sitting on the floor, her own little shrine of Peanut Butter around her. She's a JIF girl. Me, I prefer Peter Pan.

"Don't these people know anything?" I sighed, exasperatedly. "Really? What were they thinking? If you're going to have an entire aisle dedicated to Peanut Butter, the next aisle has to be spoons." Danni grinned, mischievously.

"James..."

"Uh-huh?" I said, absentmindedly, examining the Peanut Butter. Is that a scratch on the label?

"The next aisle..." She paused, for dramatic purposes. "...is the candy aisle."

I froze, my fingers in mid-reach for the suspect with the scratched label. "Candy?" I breathed. She nodded, smirking. In an instant, we were up, and in one bounding leap, we jumped over the towering aisles and landed in front of the M&M's section.

Okay, well, actually we didn't leap over the shelves, more like walked around them, but honestly, where's the fun in that?

"Danni...I challenge you to a duel to the death! A fight to the finish! A battle to the--"

"Alright, alright!" Danni interrupted. "Choose your weapon." I grinned, then held aloft a single, gold-wrapped ball of chocolate: a Ferrero Rocher.

"En guarde!"

With that, I pelted her, like one would with a snowball, but the effect was not quite as satisfying. It did not shatter and soak into her clothes, freezing her until she could no longer adequately throw, but it was satisfying, none the less.

Yelping, Danni grabbed a bag of M&M's, and I laughed.

"M&M's? Againt the almighty power of the French?" I paused, thoughtfully. "Is Ferrero Rocher even French?" She shrugged, tore open the bag, and held up the contents.

Two words: Fun Size.

"AH! NOT THE FUN SIZE PACKS!" I shrieked, diving as she threw a well-aimed blow to my head. I retaliated, chucking another Ferrero Rocher. Not surprisingly, my aerodynamics were much better, the roundish shape assisting in the speed and accuracy.

Hmm...Aerodynamics...

Abandoning the Chocolate Wars (soon to be the next Episode in the Star Wars saga), I leapt to my feet, and Danni did as well, all fatal Ferrero wounds forgotten. Laughing rather maniacally, if I do say so myself, we slid oh-so-nonchalantly into the mops-and-brooms aisle. Grabbing a broom, I straddled it, saying, "It's the fastest broom in the world, isn't it, Danni?" I said in a high-pitched British accent. She grinned, 'mounting' her own.

"We'll see about that!"

We raced down the cleaning aisle, past the fabric section, through the electronics twice, and once around the jewelry department before we slammed into someone next to the shampoo aisle.

It was the manager.

"What do you think you're doing?" he demanded, whilst trying to uphold the store-policy smile.

"Testing the aerodynamics," I said, seriously. Danni hid a snicker behind a hacking cough.

"Really..." he said, in a dangerous voice. He was tall, sallow, with greasy black hair. He distinctly reminded me of Professor Snape.

Danni, receiving my psychic vibes, reached over and handed him a bottle. "Here. Go wash your hair. You could use it." With that we leapt up and dashed away, leaving him shocked. "That felt good," Danni laughed, flopping down on the floor of the books section.

"Not good," I replied, in a British accent, picking up a copy of Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire. "Brilliant!" She grinned.

"Yeah, it was fun. You were right, though. He does look exactly like Snape, if you were to put Snape in a Wal-Mart uniform." I nodded, flipping to the start-of-term feast.

"It's a shame we don't do this more often," I mused. "We should've thought of this a long time ago." A girl walked by with bushy brown hair and rather large teeth. She looked suspiciously at us, then moved on. I stared at Danni.

She looked exactly like Hermione Granger.

No way. It's just a coincidence. Like the manager.

You're probably right, but it can't hurt to dream, can it?

No, but it only hurts more when we realize that our whims and fancies are just that: whims and fancies.

A boy walked by with a pale, pointed face. He looked directly at me, gave a flirtatious grin, and continued walking.

Okay, so why was that guy the spitting image of Draco Malfoy?

And more importantly, why did he smile like that?

With a smile like that, I wouldn't be complaining.

I'm not, except about the fact that he's not flashing that smile again.

Three boys walked past. One was tall and black, the other two were shorter, stockier, freckled, and red-headed, not to mention identical twins.

...Alright, this is getting too weird. That was DEFINITELY Lee Jordan, and the Weasley twins.

Either you're right, or we're going insane.

...or both.

HEY!

Anyway, there's one way to find out.

How?

Duh. Ask them for their names. Use our amazing femme-suave. And if they're normal, get their numbers, too. Those are some fine pieces of arse.

...I think I could live with your plan.

Praying to God we weren't crazy, Danni and I left our corner and hurried to catch up to the threesome that had just walked by. (Not that kind of threesome.) "Oy! What're your names?"

Oh yeah. Suave. Nice.

Shut. UP.

"Er, I'm Fred Weasley...This is my twin, George..."

Thank you, Captain Obvious of the No Duh Realm...

"And I'm Lee Jordan. Who're you?" I grinned, rocking a bit. If I wasn't hyper at Wal-Mart, I sure as hell was now!

"I'm James Ryder, and this is my best mate, Danni Foster," I said, holding out my hand. The three boys shook it, grinning in amusement at my obvious sugar-high.

"Pleased to meet you," George said, oh-so-smoothly, kissing Danni's hand. She giggled--yes, giggled--and blushed.

"Charmed, I'm sure." I rolled my eyes.

"Hate to interrupt this lovely little flirt-a-thon, but could you three tell us what floor Dumbledore's study is on?" Danni gave me a glare, but I inconspicuously did not look at her. However, I cannot keep her thoughts out of my head.

I'm SO going to kill you.

Kill me later. We have to get enrolled!

"Sure. It's on the fifth floor. Can you get there all right?" I nodded, gave a hurried thanks, then dragged Danni out of the library. Of course, as fate would have it, I slammed directly into someone.

"Ack! Sorry, I--" I stopped talking as I realized I had slammed into Draco Malfoy.

"Well, hel-lo," Draco Malfoy purred. He was holding my wrists to steady me. He gave me that million-dollar smile and I blushed crimson, pulling away from him.

"Yeah, hi. Got to go talk to the Headmaster. See you later!"

"Oh, you will. No doubt about it." I dashed off, mentally slapping myself for saying 'See you later.' Meanwhile, Danni was snickering in my head.

Looks like somebody's Malfoy's target. I must say, it's a welcomed change after Pansy Parkinson.

Shut. UP.

Ooh, nice comeback. Scary girl.

I ignored her, stopping in front of the gargoyle. "Shit. What's the password?" I wondered aloud.

"Well, if we told you, then it wouldn't be much of a password, now would it?" the gargoyle sneered. I flipped it off, then said, "Wait, if Fred and George are still here, then we must know it. Think of all the past passwords."

"Sherbert Lemon!"

"Lemon Drop!"

"Cockroach Clusters!" The gargoyle sprang aside. "Ha," I smirked. "We must be in Harry's fourth year."

"You did pick up Goblet of Fire..." Danni pointed out. I rolled my eyes and stepped onto the moving staircase. It stopped at the large door with a gryffin knocker. I knocked, hesitantly.

"Come in," called a warm voice. We stepped, hesitantly, inside. Professor Dumbledore was standing next to Fawkes, petting the brilliant bird. I admired his beautiful red-and-gold plume, then turned to Professor Dumbledore.

"Er, Professor Dumbledore...My name is Jaime Ryder, and this is Danielle Montgomery. We're...from...America, and...we somehow ended up...here," I said, awkwardly. Dumbledore raised one eyebrow.

"Oh?" We nodded.

"We'd like to be enrolled as...transfer students." He sat down at his large mahogany desk and placed his fingers together, surveying us over them.

"Really...Well, term only started two days ago...Have you been to a magical institute before?" I glanced at Danielle.

You can take this one...

Gee, thanks.

Ah...Sarcasm...

"Well, not exactly, no..." Dumbledore's eyes twinkled.

"I thought not."

"You see, sir, we're actually from another...dimension, I suppose. In our...dimension, the wizarding world is only in books. We know all about Hogwarts, but we've never actually done magic." He smiled.

"You're fourteen?" he asked. We both nodded in unison. "Well, I suppose...if you're willing to work hard...we can enroll you. You'll have to work very hard after your regular lessons so we can catch you up, but I have a sneaking suspicion that that won't take long."

He smiled, and we high-fived each other. "YES!"