Written for the PillarPair challenge over at DeviantART. This story is not meant to be taken seriously at all. It kills canon and its characters. The characters are completely out of character and it makes me want to burn my eyes. I might actually redo this but I'm too lazy and my friend (the founder of the PillarPair group at DeviantART) demands a FanFiction from me so it stays… for now. There are about a million and three grammar mistakes and if you would like to BETA this, just tell me. I might just love you forever.
Final warning: Pure crack. Out of characters. Horrible grammar. Read at your own risk.
Disclaimer: I do not own Prince of Tennis or any of its characters.
PillarPair Challenge
(1) Kiss
Tezuka received his first (indirect) kiss from Echizen when he was seventeen years, three months, and six days old, captain of Seigaku High School's Boy's Tennis team and trying to figure out who should be in what block for the ranking tournaments that is to be held later that week.
"Fuji!" Tezuka said sharply.
The tennis prodigy smiled back at him, eyes closed, lips wet. "Heeh," he said. "You just shared an indirect kiss with Echizen."
Tezuka blinked, opening and closing his mouth a few times wondering just how in the world he was going to respond to that. "Don't lie," he mumbles three minutes later, long after Fuji had left the room.
The next day, Tezuka couldn't help but notice the way Ryoma glared at Fuji. He had been late to morning practice (as usual) and Tezuka was about to assign him laps but stopped short when he noticed that Echizen seemed to have been in an unusually bad mood; he had pushed past Fuji with a glare, a huff and went straight to practice strength-filled Twist Serves. Tezuka spent the next five minutes wondered if Echizen was imagining his serves smashing into Fuji's face.
In the end, much to everyone's surprise (including Tezuka's), Ryoma was never assigned punishment laps for being late. Ryoma also avoided Fuji for the rest of morning practice, despite Fuji's many attempts to engage him in either a match or a conversation. Tezuka, remember Fuji's comment about his "indirect kiss with Echizen" took it upon himself to avoid Echizen as much as possible because whenever the first-year regular was within a meter radius of him, he found himself flushing. Tezuka also began avoided Inui because the data-collector was smiling, glasses glinting in the morning sun when he pulled out the third fresh notebook of the day and began filling it in while casting Tezuka I-know-something-you-don't-want-me-to-know looks.
Other than all the avoiding, bugging, and note taking however, Tezuka deemed the day pretty normal, until of course Fuji decided to confront Ryoma when they were all in the locker room changing for class.
"Ne, Echizen, you weren't angry at me kissing you before. Why are you angry now?"
Tezuka, along with everyone else froze with shock; their head turning towards the two tennis prodigies wondering exactly what was going on. Tezuka blinked. Fuji was actually serious about the kiss?
Echizen, however, wasn't embarrassed by Fuji's comment. Instead, the young prodigy turned a hate-filled glare towards Fuji.
"My, that's a scary look," said Fuji happily.
"You," Ryoma said through gritted teeth, "left a mark."
Everyone gaped and Fuji opened his eyes. "Oh?"
"I had two hours of sleep last night because my stupid dad wouldn't stop pestering me about what girl I knocked up."
Fuji smiled again. "Did you tell him it was Tezuka?"
Tezuka flushed. What?
Ryoma blinked. "No." Silence. Then: "Should I?"
"Would you like to make him speechless?"
A pause. "Hmm…"
Tezuka received his first (accidental) kiss from Echizen when he was seventeen years, four months, and two days old, captain of Seigaku High School's Boy's Tennis team and wondering a half and hour beforehand if it was a good idea to show up at the Echizen household unannounced.
He knocked again, praying that someone was home and cursing himself because he didn't call beforehand.
"Hold your fuckin' horses," a voice called out muffled by the walls.
The door swung open and Tezuka found himself staring into the dark brown eyes of Echizen Nanjirou. This, Tezuka had thought. This is Echizen's father. This is the guy who shook the tennis world. This is my her— He blinked. Is that a porn magazine?
"Who the hell are you?"
"Ah." Tezuka said, quickly adjusting his glasses and bowing. "I am Tezuka Kunimitsu, the captain of your son's tennis team and—"
"You look like a guy."
Tezuka looked up. "Excuse me?"
Nanjirou looked about to cry. "I thought you would be at least girly looking."
"What?"
"You left hickeys on my son!" Nanjirou said, exploding.
Tezuka gaped in shock, wondering what the hell was going on because he certainly did not leave hickeys on anyone's son much less Echizen Nanjirou's. "Uh..."
Nanjirou sighed after a couple tense seconds, oblivious to Tezuka's confusion. "You must be just that good in bed, huh?"
What?
"Buchou!" Tezuka looked up and through the doorway in surprise at Ryoma who was glaring at his father. "Old man," Ryoma said, his voice low with annoyance. "Stop harassing buchou."
Usually Tezuka would have scolded Echizen about not treating his father with respect but he was still speechless and confused about Ryoma's apparent hickeys. He saw but barely processed the sight of Ryoma pushing his father out of the doorway and pulling Tezuka into the house. Twice Tezuka caught himself staring at Ryoma's exposed neck.
Hickeys? What hickeys?
"Ignore him," Ryoma mumbled.
Tezuka shook his head, silently telling himself that it was a waste of time to ponder on such thoughts. Echizen Nanjirou probably left the tennis world for mental issues anyway. "Do you have the balls?" Tezuka asked and noticed too late that his choice was words were a little bit too suggestive especially since Nanjirou who was wiggling eyebrows at him.
Unsurprisingly, Ryoma didn't seem to notice. "Yes," he answered back and then: "Come on buchou, they're in my room." He gave his father a cool look. "You're not staying down here with him."
Tezuka allowed himself to be dragged away.
"Hey captain-kid."
Ryoma huffed and Tezuka turned around. "Echizen-san?"
"Here," Nanjirou said, tossing a small package to Tezuka who caught it with ease. "Play safe."
Blink.
Ryoma glowered as Tezuka stared at the package of condom in horror. Blink. Gape. Blink.
Ryoma snatched it Tezuka's frozen hand and threw it back to his father. "Keep your toys to yourself."
Nanjirou blinked. "You want toys?"
"What?"
"They're in the basement."
"Old man," Ryoma said warningly. "I'm going to burn all your magazines." Without waiting for his father's response Ryoma dragged Tezuka up the stairs, two at a time. "Sorry," he mumbled. "I usually stuff him in the basement when someone comes over, but I didn't know you were coming."
"Ah," Tezuka responded pretending that he knew what Ryoma meant.
"We're hiding in my room until he stops hollering downstairs. Maybe mom will get back by then."
Ryoma pulls Tezuka into a dark room and closes the door behind him. Eyes averted, Tezuka tried not to notice as Echizen locked the door too. It's only precaution, Tezuka tells himself. Against Echizen-san.
They sat in almost silence for the next five minutes, not moving. Tezuka could hear Nanjirou storming around downstairs and decided that this was going to be the last time he was ever coming to Echizen's house. Ever. As a matter of fact, Tezuka decided. He wasn't even going to come within ten kilometers radius to this place.
"Buchou?"
Tezuka looks up and squints in the dark.
"Do you mind turning on the lights? They're right behind you."
Tezuka blinked and stared at the dim lights coming through Ryoma's thick curtains. "What about the curtains?"
Tezuka could see Ryoma lifting his head up in the dark. "Sure, you can open those if you want."
Lazy, Tezuka thinks and gets up. He fumbles for the light switch for a minute before actually managing to turn the lights on. A sudden flood of bright light fills the room forcing Tezuka to close his eyes painfully as he attempts to find his seat at the edge of Ryoma's bed. Foot hitting the edge of the side table, Tezuka almost yelps in surprise as he looses his balance and falls forward.
A loud crash echo across the room as Tezuka knocks a lamp off of the end table as he pushes his arms out in front of him in order to catch his fall. Tezuka opens his eyes only to find himself face to face with Echizen lying underneath his outstretched arms.
"Owww," Ryoma mumbles, seeing stars behind closed eyelids.
"Are you okay?" Tezuka asks.
Ryoma opens his eyes and blinks. Once. Twice. "Yea."
Silence.
"Buchou?"
"Ah?"
"Can you get off me?"
Tezuka flushes. "Of course. My apologies."
He pushes himself off the ground (and Echizen) the same time Nanjirou decided that pouting around downstairs wasn't going to bring Ryoma or his (hickey-giving) boyfriend out of the room and that if he wanted to see his flesh and blood in action, he was going to have to take matters into his own hand.
The door to Ryoma's bedroom flew open from, hitting Tezuka's back and sending him flying back towards Ryoma who was attempting to sit up. Tezuka's head hits Ryoma's and the both fell back towards the ground with mouths pressed tightly together.
Nanjirou blinks at them, taking note on how along with their lips, their noses were also awkwardly pressed together and frowns. "That is not the right way to kiss."
Tezuka spends the next week avoiding Echizen.
Tezuka received his first (drunk) kiss from Echizen when he was seventeen years, four months, and nine days old, captain of Seigaku High School's Boy's Tennis team and thinking that sake was the best invention in the world forty minutes prior to the kiss.
It had began with a victory and now everyone was celebrating at Kawamura's Sushi shop. Nothing out of the ordinary, which is why Tezuka had allowed his teammates to go. And when Kawamura's father had offered them each a cup of sake for the celebration, Tezuka hadn't declined because although it was unlawful, they had just won the semi-nationals (besides it was either that or Inui Juice). "Only a cup each though," he remembers telling his teammates firmly.
In the end Inui mixed his sake with some new Inui Juice and had told Tezuka that his special juice (somehow) brought down the alcohol level in the sake and therefore he should be allowed to have more than one cup. Momoshiro didn't think that was fair, ignored Tezuka's glare and poured himself another cup. Kaido, who didn't want to lose to his rival's sake-drinking ability hissed and took a large mug off the counter and filled it up to the rim with sake. Kikumaru thought that it was all great fun and much to Oishi's horror began drinking straight from the bottle and then when Oishi wasn't looking, Tezuka caught Kikumaru refilling the vice-captain's cup.
After that another bottle of sake was brought out.
And another.
And another.
Tezuka faintly remembers himself accepting Fuji's offer of water when he accidentally ate one of the wasabi rolls. The water, Tezuka noticed had tasted a bit… different but he did just have had the top layer of his tongue burned off so he didn't give it farther thought.
Three minutes after downing Fuji's water, Tezuka finds himself hot, dizzy, and demanding more of that water, 'cause it was pretty damn good.
Soon, the third bottle of sake became the fourth and then fifth.
It takes Tezuka exactly three minutes after finishing his second cup of sake to realized that he had been tricked by Fuji and was now very drunk. Wow, Tezuka thinks. I never knew I had such a low tolerance for alcohol. He blames the tea.
Out of the corner of his eyes, he sees Fuji slipping some sake into Echizen's Ponta can and wonders exactly how long the blue-eyed genius has been doing that, how drunk Echizen was, and how the hell was he going to explain this to Echizen's parents. He watches in drunken horror as Echizen downs the can of Ponta. "Echizen!" he says. "Don't drink that! Fuji just spiked it." Except it came out as: "Echhissen. Dun drain at. Fujiiissss."
He remembers Echizen giving him a funny look before ignoring him.
Half an hour after Echizen downs another can of Ponta with Tezuka unable to actually do anything about it, everyone began staggering home. Tezuka, feeling sorry that he was unable to keep Echizen sober, took it upon himself to walk the first-year home. That and he didn't remember where he lives.
Tezuka instantly felt sick as the cold breeze hits him when he slid the shop door open. He swallowed harshly, grabbed Echizen's hand and pulled him along. The walk was silent and Tezuka wasn't even sure he knew where he was going.
"Buchou?" asked a slurred voice.
"Ah?" Tezuka looked around.
"Kiss me."
Before Tezuka could react, Ryoma was in front of him, gold eyes glinting in the dark and Tezuka found that he couldn't—didn't want to—look away. "Echizen," he said slowly in his best drunken obey-me voice. "You are drunk."
"Hmm," Echizen said. "Yes. But so are you."
Tezuka wondered how he was going to respond to that.
"Besides," Ryoma said. "You probably won't remember anything tomorrow."
The reason must have been an 'okay' for Tezuka's body because the next thing that registered in his mind is him pushing Echizen up against a nearby wall and kissing the hell out of the younger man. Tezuka groaned as Echizen's tongue stroked his own making him shiver with anticipation on what's to come, or what would come if they weren't in the middle of the streets. Tezuka realizes that instant that he wasn't as drunk as he thought he was because his next thoughts were: Damn the consequences. And: Oh god, where did he learn how to kiss like this?
Tezuka prays that he won't remember the incident the next morning because he just knows that if he does, he be having to deal with tight pants for the rest of his life if Echizen stands close to him ever again.
"Come on buchou," Ryoma says pulling away. "Let's get you home."
"Eh?" Tezuka asked, his head dizzy in ways not only caused by the alcohol. "I'm walking you home?"
"How are you walking yourself home than?"
"Um…" Tezuka said. "Where is home?"
"Exactly."
The rest of the night flew by after that (although he does recall more kissing) and Tezuka didn't remember how long it took Echizen to walk him home, how Echizen got into his house, or if they did anything other than kissing before Echizen left. And when Tezuka woke up the next morning, he wondered if he got shot in the head and is now dead and in hell because of all the laps he enjoyed assigning.
What, he thinks to himself, happened last night? He managed to force himself out of his bed and began his morning chores while trying to remember what happened after Fuji's 'water' and how the hell he got back to his house. No more sake, he vows. Ever.
When the headache refused to disappear after his morning tea Tezuka also vows that Fuji will be spending for the rest of the year running laps and drinking Inui Juice. Oh wait…
Thirty minutes later (it would have been twenty but the hangover slowed him down) Tezuka was standing in Seigaku High School's tennis court looking for Fuji and ready to assign triple digit laps. Usually, Fuji, along with Oishi would be one of the first regulars to arrive but surprisingly Tezuka found himself watching the infamously (usually) late first year walk into the courts to warm up with the rest of the early arrivals with his racket in one hand and a can of Ponta in another.
"Kiss me."
Tezuka blinked.
And then it all comes crashing back down to him. Tezuka swallowed and mentally assigned himself triple digit laps because he needed something to distract him from the memory of Echizen's tongue stroking his own and—he shudders. Mentally, Tezuka crosses his fingers, toes, legs, arms, eyes, and pairs every strand of his hair up and crosses them too. He holds his breath as Ryoma looks over at him and prays, prays, prays that the first year does remember anything because if he does Tezuka swears that he's going to go find the nearest cliff and jump off of it.
"Buchou," Echizen greets.
"Go do your warm-ups." Tezuka replies, mentally patting himself on the back for not stuttering. Then the rest of the regulars arrived and Tezuka finds himself paling when he notices Fuji.
However, instead of walking up to him, Fuji made his way towards Echizen. Tezuka narrowed his eyes because this was Fuji and Fuji was always up to something.
"So, Echizen…" Fuji says. "Anything interesting happened last night after the party?"
Tezuka held his breath.
"No."
"Hmm." Fuji opened his eyes. "We're all having the worst hang-over. I can still feel my temple throbbing. Are you okay Echizen? I might have accidentally slipped some sake into your Ponta yesterday."
Liar, Tezuka thinks.
"I'm fine," Ryoma says looking at Tezuka. "I have a very high tolerance for alcohol. Five cans of spiked Ponta isn't going to get me drunk nor give me a hangover, sempai."
Tezuka spends the next two weeks avoiding Echizen.
Tezuka received his first (dream) kiss from Echizen when he was seventeen years, five months, and six days old, captain of Seigaku High School's Boy's Tennis team and still going through puberty.
The tennis captain knows he's dreaming. He knows he's dreaming because there is just no way a fifteen year old (still complete underage) kohai of his would be taking him in, throat deep and tongue swirling around and around and—oh!
"Buchou," dream Echizen purrs. The vibrations traveling up Tezuka's erection, spine and eventually Tezuka thinks that the world itself is shaking. Why is he so good at this?
Tezuka looks down with heated eyes, surprisingly able to see without his glasses and groans because he knows that he's close to coming. Dream or not…
Dream Echizen pulls himself up, Tezuka down and then they are kissing. Tezuka could feel every centimeter of dream Echizen's skin. He could feel the heat, the wetness, and the hardness of dream Echizen's own erection. Oh, Tezuka thinks.
Then dream Echizen pulls away, a thin strand of saliva connecting their mouths. "Buchou," he says. "Wake up and try the real thing, ne?"
Tezuka spends the next week and a half avoiding Echizen.
Tezuka received his first real kiss from Echizen when he was seventeen years, five months, and twenty-two days old, captain of Seigaku High School's Boy's Tennis team and damning the consequences of his actions.
Tezuka has Ryoma pressed up and against the walls of the locker room as the other team members practice and run laps outside. Oh, Tezuka thinks. This is so much better than his dreams and his imagination because he could actually taste Ryoma who unsurprisingly tastes like grape-flavor Ponta.
He feels Ryoma's smaller hands grip his hair and realizes with a sudden jolt that this wasn't a dream and that he was actually kissing Ryoma. He pulls away only to have Ryoma pull him back and their lips crash together again and Tezuka realizes that Ryoma wants this as much as he does. Any further thought washed away and all Tezuka could think is how hot it was, how hard he was, and how Ryoma kept grinding against the right spot. Tezuka groaned.
"Buchou," Ryoma says, a bit breathlessly.
"Ah?"
A low almost-purr vibrates across Ryoma's neck and Tezuka ravishes it in an instant, enjoying the way Ryoma's breath hitches in his throat as Tezuka swirls his tongue across the soft skin.
"I have a confession to make."
Tezuka blinked and slowed his movements.
"I was never drunk that day."
"Oh?" Tezuka asks, his hands gripping Ryoma. He closes his mouth over Ryoma's neck and sucks.
"…and I think I just saw Fuji-sempai out the window…"
Tezuka wondered why that mattered to Ryoma because the only thing that mattered to him right now was how unbelievably tight his pants were and how he was going to get Ryoma to relieve it.
"…with a camera."
Did I mention that this was crack? And that it was out of character? And after rereading this, I decided that I will go back and edit this because it came out like crap. So please forgive me and give me a few years. When you reread this FanFiction in a couple of years, I will have it all edited and pretty.