"Kushina sweetheart what are you doing?"

My name isn't Kushina.

"We have to leave sweetheart. It is a long journey to Konoha."

I don't want to go there because Im going to hate myself and all the Naruto fans are gonna hate me.

"I Know it's scary and you going to be homesick but we promise that you will love it there."

I don't want to go there because that means I'm going to meet him.

"Of course mother" she murmured.

As she started to drag her feet on the road her mind started to wonder. She knows that there was no avoiding the situation. It's been too many years to think that all of this was just a dream. Unlike the hype of reincarnation in fanfictions she never ever wanted to live in the Naruto world. Maybe when she was in her teens but not when she had a family in another life. She still is amazed she hasn't had a mental break down from the stress and the identity crisis she was having. When she was born there was a lot of crying but it wasn't only because it was natural but out of fear and grief. She cried a lot for the first few months of her second life. She missed her children and her love of her life. She missed their smiles and laughs. Her family was her life. Why isn't she in heaven like the bible says. Is this her hell? Is god punishing her by sending her to this world? Her new parents are kind but she still remembers her first mother and it still feels like betrayal calling Asuka mother. Her mother may have died young but she remembered her black hair and her beautiful smile and her kindness.

Being born in Uzushiogakure was peculiar. Most of the stories she use to read as a teen had their characters born in Konoha or in Suna or even in warring clan era. There were even uzumaki characters but she never expected to born as a replacement to a canon character. Even thinking about it hurts. She couldn't be born as a nobody could she. She was at least grateful to be born the same gender at least. However she felt guilty when she realized who she was. Not only was she vital in the manga but now that she is here and sees this world is real, she is terrified of the future. She felt even guilt for the real Kushina because she stole her life and took it over. She was worse than a Yamanka because at least they don't erase the soul. She was born in a bad period though, especially since she knew that Uzu would be destroyed and is being targeted from other nations. Uzu was actually beautiful and the people are generous and even though she is expected to be a warrior they never pressured her to start early .Her parents protected her from starting to early. Which was a relief since she is a peacemaker and the thought of violence never sat with her. And when Uzu was attacked when she was only five was a scary experience, she was actually scared that she was gonna die especially seeing fellow Uzumaki being murdered. When Asuka started to run with her fleeing, she was sad to leave uzu for she thought it was wasn't a bad place and was peaceful compared to where she was going.

I want to go back home.

She knew what was waiting for her in Konoha; her becoming a jinchūriki and meeting him. She was nervous because once she reaches Konoha then Naruto will never be born and that means the child of prophecy will never be born and the whole universe will explode and the Naruto fans will have her crucified. She can't have that pressure on herself plus the real Kushina died the day Naruto was born. When she reincarnated, suicide wasn't an foreign thought she had however she pushed herself out of those contemplations when she thought about her husband who would've been disappointed in her. She still believes that even now. So dying for a person she doesn't know personally is not going to cut it especially with the part with him. This one person she is going to meet makes her paralyze with fear and the main reason she hates him is because she is scared the universe is going to use her as a puppet and somehow make her his no matter what. Even though she knows this is silly and stems from paranoia she can't help it.

"Kushina sweetheart please talk to me, you have been so quiet that you worry me"

"I'm sorry mother I just been lost in my head. You know me I'm always in my own world" She said dryly.

"I hope you change that attitude when we get there. You have been mopey since we left and it causing your mother to be distressed" said her father harshly.

He never was one to mince his words. Maybe that is where Naruto gets it.

"Oh sweetheart don't be harsh, Kushina is just sad we are leaving home even I am and she is a child Hotoka" said Asuka fretfully.

"No mother, father is right I should try to be optimistic and stop bringing dark clouds over us with my attitude" Kushina said faintly.

I have to stop moping it isn't going to change anything I just have to suck it up and just keep my head down and try to live a stress free life and be a skilled ninja that I don't die.

Though having the kyubbi around will be nice. At least there is someone she can tell her secret and they won't send her to jail or use her…or maybe Kurama might manipulate her. However if she tells him how she knows the whole story they can have an amicable relationship…hopefully.

As they finally arrived after hours of walking the first thing she thought was how big those gates are and wonders with the size of them how the village can be named the village hidden in the leaves with those gates towering the trees which are already massive and towering.

As they present their paperwork she looked at the ninjas who were looking over the paperwork and she realized how odd it was that she was finally here. Back in uzu she never saw any of the characters from the manga and so to meet people were like first meetings now that she is here she is gonna meet characters and she is gonna have to force herself to not see them as characters but as real people.

As they passed the gates she looked around the village and realized that it looked a little different from the manga, they were less buildings and they were no recognizable landmarks. Though she could see the Hokage mountain and see their faces.

It reminds me of Mount Rushmore.

His face isn't there yet.

As we walked through the village she passed by the academy and realized that she was going to start there tomorrow which made her uneasy. She knew that the real Kushina was bullied because of her hair and her attitude. Speaking of hair she twirled a few strands as she looked at them. She was surprised that she was a redhead and even after five years it was hard to look in the mirror and see a new face. In her first life she was a latina and had a deep brown tan and black hair. She was happy with her appearance because she looked like her mom. However she used to be jealous of girls with pretty red hair especially with how literature and media culture idolized them in her old life. There was Ariel from the Little Mermaid, there was Lily Potter and Ginny Weasly from Harry Potter and even when she read the manga and watched the anime Kushina was pretty. So for her to end up as a redhead was ironic. Though Kushina's was a deep blood red kind though compared to the auburn she saw back in her old life. She knew that he loved her hair which unfortunately was bad for her since she wanted to stay out of his radar.

As they left the academy students started to leave and all the kids looked at her curiously. She was shy and blushed when the students walking by her started to whisper. Even though she was mentally older doesn't mean she isn't affected by other kids her age. However she paled and her blood turned cold when she thought she saw yellow hair walking out of the school. And when she actually saw him she was scared he would noticed her. So she turned the other way and grabbed her parents hand and rushed them away from the school. As her parents questioned her what was wrong all she could think about was him.

He has beautiful eyes.

A/N:

Hello readers I hope you enjoyed the first chapter. I wanted to go with a different direction with the SI/OC stories. I know there are a lot of stories with the SI being related to the main character and even some with the characters being born as Sakura or other characters in the story but I wanted to try this idea since it interests me how being born before the manga can change things especially being someone important that can unravel the future. I will say this is going to be romance but that won't come out for a very long time. I want my kushina to grow and learn how to live in this very different world. Plus my SI is actually a lot older compared to others. She was 32 when she died. She does know how the series ends as well since the series ended when she 22. Also I have no beta so I would appreciate if anyone can help with this story. Please review it helps me to become a better writer and it makes me happy if people are actually interested in my story. Pm me if you have any questions or even suggestions.