Sitting in a doctor's office as they looked over test results, one would usually experience some level of anxiety. Strangely enough, Yuzu wasn't one such person. She sat on the other side of the wide mahogany desk like an expectant firecracker, shooting a steady supply of smiles at Mei, who was sitting in the chair next to her. The dark haired woman appeared more appropriately restrained in her seat, weathering Yuzu's sunny smiles with an umbrella of professionalism. Though she was also sitting with a confident and ready posture. They were both clearly eager to proceed with whatever plan the doctor set out for them.
Just not ready for this sort of plan.
"Wait, hang on," Yuzu interrupted the words coming out of the doctor's mouth. Words like "infertile", "dangerous", and "I fully advise against it".
Yuzu leaned forward in her chair trying to get her bearings for a few seconds. Her face had fallen, so full of hope just moments ago, now open with shock. "What're you… what do you mean?"
The doctor nodded in understanding, placing her glasses on her desk as she simplified. "I'm afraid the chances of you becoming pregnant are extremely unlikely."
"How unlikely?" Mei's voice cut in authoritively from the chair next to her, diverting the doctor's attention and giving Yuzu a chance to recover from what felt like a sucker punch to the gut.
"Around one in a thousand," the doctor answered readily, voice taking on a grim tone. "And even if the insemination were successful, the pregnancy itself would be dangerous. The child and the mother would be at major risk." Her words were directed at Yuzu, the subject of the test who could only stare at the pattern on the carpet in disbelief. "Do you understand?"
She couldn't bring herself to answer. Her throat felt dry but she felt as if she were drowning. Her eyes, wide and lost, instinctively sought out Mei. She desperately searched for reassurance, that this diagnosis was a lie, anything. The dark haired woman held her gaze for several tense moments before turning back to the doctor, unable to offer any of those things. Wounded, Yuzu stayed silent the rest of the meeting as Mei asked questions and pressed for options and solutions.
A heavy daze settled over her as they walked out of the clinic. She was aware of Mei taking her hand and leading them to their car, but she barely felt it. The baby magazines littering the backseat made her feel sick to her stomach. It was the weirdest feeling, mourning over something she never even had. Something she hadn't realized she could never have.
"Yuzu." Mei waited until Yuzu focused on her face. "Put on your seatbelt."
Yuzu blinked at the words, their ordinary nature catching her off guard. At least it seemed to snap her out of her numbness. "Oh. Right." She clicked the belt into place to keep her body in place as her mind felt anything but secure.
It was such a beautiful day out too. The type of day that just a few hours ago inspired her spacious heart to decorate a new space, and she took the liberty of stuffing a thousand fantasies into it. Her imagination had worked overtime and Mei listened as Yuzu gushed over the baby magazines and hummed lullabies on the drive over.
The sun felt too bright now. Yuzu placed a hand over her stinging eyes to block it and swallowed roughly.
The newly formed space in her heart was left wanting, vacated by a dream of providing Mei with a family. It was all she had ever wanted for the other woman. Blocking the sun wasn't lessening the stinging and her jaw tightened as frustration and guilt gripped her. What a fool she was! The thought of complications had never even crossed her mind, even with her father's medical history! She had gotten Mei's hopes up for a child, only to have them dashed because of her. Her fingers pressed into her eyelids and her teeth hurt from clenching them.
A quiet "I'm sorry" forced itself past her rapidly closing throat.
All she heard was silence in response and another apology was bubbling up her throat and she hiccuped on it when she felt the car pulling over. Mei put the car in park and pointedly unclipped her seatbelt. When Yuzu peeked she was surprised to see and feel Mei climbing over into her seat and into her lap. It wasn't exactly a spacious car, and the spontaneous move from Mei made Yuzu flail in place to accommodate her. She fumbled for the seat recliner and Mei was already pushing her back so the seat went down with them all at once.
For the first time in years, Yuzu shied away from Mei's lips. Guilt and inadequacy was sitting on her chest and she could barely look into Mei's face without biting back tears. Mei didn't seem deterred, kissing Yuzu's brow, cheek, and nuzzling into her neck. Patiently giving Yuzu time. The blonde's hands clenched and unclenched in Mei's skirt as she took several deep breaths to calm her nerves. A thumb gently stroked her cheek, drawing her face towards Mei. With Mei so close she couldn't help eventually seeking out her comfort. Their lips gravitated towards each other and they kissed softly.
"Don't apologize," Mei whispered against her lips as she held her face. Yuzu closed her eyes and bit back the apology wrestling inside. "I shouldn't have placed the burden on you. It's my fault you feel this way."
Yuzu was quick to shake her head at that. "No no, I know how much your career means to you. Having a baby was my idea, I.." Yuzu's voice was strangled with the threat of new tears.
Mei leaned her forehead against Yuzu's, eyes stern as she delivered a simple order: "Stop."
A loving scoff managed to slip from Yuzu's throat. "You can't tell me what to do."
"Yes I can."
Yuzu's body seemed to agree with Mei. She felt her muscles relax a little and some of the tension leave her. Mei pecked the corner of her lips one last time before clambering out of her lap and back to the driver's seat, much to Yuzu's disappointment. Her insides still ached with loss, but for the time being the chances of her bursting into tears were lowered due to Mei's efforts.
It was a long drive back home, and they settled into one of their companionable silences. Yuzu grasped at Mei's hand between them to draw strength from her. When Mei squeezed her fingers, Yuzu did her best to cheer up.
She supposed it wasn't the end of the world! It wasn't like they were out of options. There was always adoption, though it was a long shot. And puppies were always an option, right? Puppies were cute. Or maybe even-
"I will carry our child," Mei interrupted Yuzu's thoughts with her sudden announcement.
"...Huh?"
Mei glanced at Yuzu after a few seconds, her eyes narrowing and her cheeks coloring the more the blonde stared at her. "...W-what?" Mei asked, her lips pursing at Yuzu's apparent shock. "Don't act so surprised. There are two uteruses between us. I'm naturally the next choice," she reasoned, even as she appeared flustered as she spoke.
Yuzu blinked rapidly and forced her dropped jaw to start working again. "Bwa- But Mei, I thought..? It was my-... But your career... You don't have to force yourself-!"
"I have a confession." Mei's quiet words were enough to get Yuzu to stop reeling and listen. Mei worried her lip for a moment and her grip on the steering wheel shifted.
"I wanted you to have the baby. Not because of my career." Her voice was steady as she opened up a rare window into her thoughts and Yuzu focused all her attention on her wife. "I thought, if the child was biologically yours, I would be able to love them."
Yuzu's head tilted in bafflement. "What do you mean?" Mei breathed in slowly, her fingers absently squeezing away at Yuzu's hand between them.
"I didn't fall in love of the idea of having a child. I fell in love of the idea of you as a mother," Mei elaborated her thoughts. "I know you'd be great. I'm not so confident in my own ability, but if the child was biologically yours, then perhaps… it'd be easier for me? To be a parent?"
Yuzu's head tilted the opposite direction, trying to make sense of her words. "Then, Mei… You don't have to do this. I refuse to pressure you. It's my fault-"
"Yuzu, please…" Mei sounded like she was on the verge of tears and it was like the wind was knocked out of Yuzu. Mei glanced at her again, meeting her eyes. "I want this. I want to start a family. With you. Above everything else."
The two women shared as long a look as they could until Mei had to focus on the road again.
Yuzu's heartbeat was soaring through her ears. "Mei, pull over."
Mei did so readily and Yuzu grabbed at her face as soon as she could, looking into her eyes. "Mei, are you sure?"
"Yes."
"Are you positive?"
"Yes."
"Mei-"
"Yes, Yuzu."
"-I love you, Mei. God." Yuzu felt so overwhelmed by her love for this woman the emotion hotly spilled over. Mei wiped her tears away and kissed her.
"Lets not be hasty," Mei reminded once they managed to get on the road again. "I'll have to get checked out the same way, and hope there are no similar problems."
"Right," Yuzu agreed even as her hand reached back for the baby magazines.
The next week they went back to the clinic. As nature dictated, Mei passed every test with flying colors.
A/N- I published this separately from my one shot series, cuz I think I'm gonna add more chapters to this. There's so much I can do with preggers Mei. Like, can you even imagine? Poor Yuzu lol