A/N: I'M ALIVE! After a while of complete isolation from , I figured I'd give you guys a treat. I originally wanted to do a truth or dare, but it looks like interviews will work just as well. So here it is, L4D Interviews!

Disclaimer: Valve owns L4D…That's it.

(ALSO: I don't want any bull about script-style. Go troll the hundreds of other scripted stories before you ruin mine.)

Me: Ah, what a lovely day it is! A great opportunity to kidnap some zombies! …AUTHOR POWERS!*

*Hunter magically teleports to stage*

Hunter: Grrrrrr, snarl, snarl…

Me: Whoops! Forgot to equip the Translation Bowtie!

*Fastens dorky bowtie to Hunter*

Hunter: …Grrrr… What the h*** is this?

Me: It's a Translation Bowtie! It allows Infected to talk normally! (With an added bonus of making you look like complete retards!)

Hunter: I heard that! *lunges*

Me: *dodges, Hunter lands in a random fangirl pit*

*Fangirls squeal and glomp Hunter*

Hunter: Gahhh! How do zombies even HAVE fangirls?

Me: *shrugs*

*Hunter teleports back into chair*

Hunter: Why am I here, anyway?

Me: To answer questions from reviewers! Although since this is only the first chapter, I'll be doing the questions!

Hunter: Fantastic. *rolls eyes that may or may not exist*

Why do you wear duct tape on your arms and legs?

Hunter: 'Cuz it's cool.

*Dead silence*

Me: …and…

Hunter: …That's it.

Is it fun jumping from building to building and climbing walls?

Hunter: It reminds me of Spider-Man, except without the weirda** spandex. But to answer, yes. Yes it is.

Do you and the Witch have a dating relationship?

Hunter: …..

Well, do you?

Hunter: It's a frackin' zombie apocalypse! Why should I date anyone, let alone the Witch!

Fine, jeez, I was just asking.

Final question: What's under your hoodie?

Hunter: *sigh* Do you really want to know?

YES Yesyesyesyesyesyesyesyes—

Hunter: Fine.

*Lifts up hoodie, revealing… Black sunglasses*

Hunter: DEAL WITH IT.

Me: *Punches pillow* Fine, time to go home. Here's your taco.

*Hunter receives taco*

Hunter: :D

Me: Do you like cheese on your taco?

Hunter: Nah. *takes bite* I'm lactose intolerant.

Me: Too bad.

Hunter: D:

Me: Trolololololololololol

A/N: Whew! Done! If you want the interviews to continue, review and post your questions! Whichever character gets the most questions will be the one I interview next! So Review!

Max8080 out, PAECE!