Author's Note: I was in a deep state of writer's depression and decided to write a Brucas oneshot. It's not very long but it helped me get out of that little block I was in. Hope you all like. Oh and please read & review!
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Lucas woke up early Saturday morning to find that his blinds had already been pulled open, the bright sun spilling into his room. "Guess I'll go for that morning run." He yawned and stretched out across his bed.
He slipped on a pair of loose fitting track pants and a white wife beater before getting completely out of bed. "I'm going out for my morning run!" Lucas called out to his mother before slipping out the back door.
Just as he shut the door he noticed an envelope resting on the ground near his feet. He bent down to pick it up, noticing his name was scribbled across the front in Brooke's handwriting. "This can't be good," Lucas mumbled to himself as he walked back inside his room.
He took a seat on the bed and carefully opened it as if he were afraid it would break. Once opened, he discovered a letter from Brooke and a picture of him and Brooke when they were dating.
The picture was of them at the beach during the summer of their senior year at Tree Hill High. Brooke was wearing that black bikini that Lucas had grown to love. At first he thought it was too revealing and wasn't interested in the fact that other guys that would be looking her way. She had just gotten out of the water and they were sharing an intimate kiss. Lucas had missed them more than he cared to admit.
After reminiscing about times past with Brooke, he got up the courage to read the letter that was sure to take away the happiness that he had been longing for.
To My Dearest Lucas,
I'm not even sure how I found the courage to write this letter to you. It might just be the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
After reading just those first few lines, Lucas' heart broke into a million pieces, but he continued to read and fight back the few tears that now threatened to fall.
I'm hoping to get everything out in the open through this piece of paper, because I knew I couldn't do it in person without falling apart right there in front of you. This letter might hurt you, or it might bring you peace. Whichever it may be, I hope you get something out of it.
When I found out that you had kissed Peyton… again, I was devastated. I wasn't angry or upset, because neither of those words had the capability of describing what I was feeling at that moment. I loved you unconditionally, Lucas and you broke my heart… but more importantly you broke me.
I cried over you for weeks and to this day, I still cry for you. Back then, I would have died for you, and in some ways I did just that. There would be days where I would just wish that I didn't know what it was like to be happy, because then I wouldn't know what it was like to feel so hurt and alone.
I would tell you time and time again that I wish I was Peyton. That I was the one you saved over and over, but it was always her. She's always been my best friend and she always will be, but you are the one thing I wasn't willing to share with her.
Over the years as you and Peyton grew closer and I just tried to convince myself that my best friend and the love of my life should be close friends. But eventually you made me the other woman… and I let you.
A feeling of guilt washed over Lucas as he read on. He had no idea that Brooke felt this strongly about his friendship with Peyton. If only he had known all of this, maybe he could have done something to save them.
None of this is completely your fault. I know I've done wrong and lead you on for so long. The first time you broke my heart, I thought that was it and that I could never be happy again. And then you kissed me before I left for California the summer before our senior year. I was so scared that I pushed you into a non-exclusive relationship, and then I slept with a guy that we all despise with a passion. I was sure that you would never speak to me again, but then you proved me wrong. You showed me that you had the biggest heart when you forgave me that night and I'll never forget it.
Whenever I was with you, I felt this calm wash over me, like nothing could ever go wrong in life as long as I had you by my side. And as soon as that was taken away from me I realized how much I needed you. It breaks my heart everytime I think about you and Peyton together, but I know that if it makes you happy, then that's what I want for you.
I'm a better person for knowing you, Luke. You have helped me become the person that I've always wanted to be. The person who cares about others, not just herself. The person that isn't afraid to put her heart on the line in order to have everything she could ever want. You helped me get there, and for that I will always be grateful.
Lucas knew what was coming and his heart ached at the thought of this being a goodbye letter. He couldn't let Brooke say goodbye without telling her that Peyton wasn't the one he needed nor the one he wanted.
Please pass along a few messages to everyone for me.
Thank Mouth for being the wonderful guy that he is and make sure to tell him that there is a girl out there just waiting for him. He just has to find her.
Tell that crazy bitch, Rachel, that I'll keep in touch and also thank her for letting me stay with her when I had no where else to go.
Let Nathan and Haley know that I love them with all my heart and I still want to be the Godmother to the baby! Best wishes to them and I know that baby is going to be a hot, smart boy considering who his parents are.
And tell Peyton thanks for the many years of support and friendship and maybe one day she'll find the happiness she has been waiting for most of her life.
And this is my final goodbye to you, Lucas. You will always have a special place in my heart. Our relationship was… "a romance that began without meaning and turned into love without end." I'll never be able to stop loving you, Lucas Scott. I just couldn't let you go without telling you how I feel.
Love Always,
Brooke
P.S. By the time you read this, I'll be on a plane to California to finish my senior year. I think it's time to let go of my past and start fresh. I hope the life you lead turns out exactly the way you want it to.
Lucas dropped to the ground and let out a heart-wrenching sob. Today had been the day he would tell Brooke how much their love meant to him. How he couldn't live another day without her kisses. Today was the day he would have asked Brooke Davis to marry him and hoped they would spend the rest of their lives as husband and wife. But now he would never get that chance.
