A CCOAC Writers of the Silver Screen Challenge Pinch Hit for Naidoo - Rossi/Garcia – The Devil Wears Prada
Wish She Were A Gold Digger
David Rossi grinned as Penelope Garcia had a heart attack.
After he had had enough of watching his fiancé continuously wince in pain, he groaned. "Kitten, stop it."
She took a deep breath that meant to calm, but it strangled her more.
"Penelope, it isn't dire." He stated smoothly in the attempt to persuade her that she was overacting.
After regaining control of her breathing, she shook her head in rebuttal, and retorted. "Mister Smexy Money Britches, this is as dire as dire gets!"
He rolled his eyes at her comment before he settled a hand upon each of her shoulders. He caressed the uncovered skin of her neck as he whispered to her in Italian. "La mia bellezza di un fidanzata, ti amo, ma sis ta dando un mal di testa."
She narrowed her eyes at him and flippantly replied in French, "Mon amant en colère, vous êtes en vertu de réagir."
He took his hands off her shoulders, took a step back, and gave her an unimpressed look. "I do not speak French, what did you just say?"
She took a step forward and placed her right hand on the left side of his face. "You sir, know that I do not speak Italian." She paused when he quirked an eyebrow as if to refute her, but she continued onward. "I love it when you lovingly whisper it to me," She paused as he grinned. She blushed before she cheekily continued, "But, whatever it was that you said to me did not sound seductive."
"Whatever you said sounded it." He replied in the vain attempt to distract her from her goal.
"Of course it was Dave," She stated primly. She wrapped her arms around his neck as she continued to talk. "I spoke French! I could have said that you are a man that has to compensate because of your small size, and it would have sounded heavenly."
"I have to what?" He asked shocked as he quickly removed her arms from his neck.
"Nothing," She said as brightly grinned at him before she picked the sparkly wallet that she had dropped during the early stages of her heart attack.
"Tonight," He growled as he playfully pointed at her with a half closed fist and stiff index finger. "I will remind you of that comment."
"Yes," She agreed before she refuted it. "But I will not worry, because that comment will be proved wrong."
He grabbed her left hip and brought herself to rest flush against him. "You're that sure of yourself?"
She smiled as she laid her right hand on his left shoulder. The pink sparkly wallet clashed against his red shirt. She batted her eyes at him playfully, before she replied. "As sure as I am that you will tell me what you said in Italian!"
He looked up at the ceiling and loosened his hold on her, but not enough so that she could step away from him. "I said that, my beauty of a girlfriend, you are giving me a headache."
She gasped in mock horror. "What?" She pushed away from him and playfully pouted. "Little ole' me, give you a headache? Why that would never happen."
"Enough." He replied both glad and amused at her antics. "Now, what did you say?"
"I said, my angry lover, you are under reacting!" She declared.
"No, Kitten, I'm not." He tenderly responded. He caressed her jaw. "You deserve the best."
"Yes," She agreed as she closed her eyes and turned inward to the caress. "I agree that I deserve the absolute best, because I am," She paused. "However that does not mean that I want, or that I want you to pay six hundred dollars for a rather beautiful yet overpriced wallet!"
"Penelope," he lowered his voice to a quiet and seductive tone and rolled her name off his tongue slowly. He brought his mouth to her ear right ear and hovered there. Her body shuddered in response. His lips touched her ear and he quickly touched his tongue to the top shell of her ear. She gasped in pleasure that she had been unprepared for. He continued with each word brining his lips against the top shell of her ear. "Let me buy the damn thing."
She turned her head away from the intimate kiss and the caressing of his fingers on her jaw. He pulled his away slightly disappointed.
In reply to his demand, she shook her head adamant. "No."
"Think of it as a gift." He suggested. She shook her head no. He added. "As a symbolism of our love?"
"Absolutely not," She exclaimed. "Our love could never have a price tag placed upon it. My love for you and yours for me is priceless and precious."
"I know, Kitten." He agreed, before he inquired. "Do I buy the wallet now or do I buy it later, sneak it into your wardrobe, and persuade you to use it?"
She sighed in defeat. "Dave."
He stated, "Yes. Penelope."
She whined. "It's so expensive."
"Bambina," He tenderly whispered before he stated. "You knew what my financial status was before we got together."
Penelope gasped as she saw that a lady near them quirked an eyebrow and her lips tilted in unabashed amusement. "Thank you so much for making me seem like a plotting gold digger!"
He titled his head back and silently wished that she were a damn gold digger. "That was not what I meant and you know it." After a moment, he titled his head back down and stared into her eyes. "If you were a plotting gold digger, we would have already bought half the store and the damn wallet.
Randomly, Penelope declared just above a whisper, "On my code!"
Dave looked at her in confusion and a bit in worry. "Penelope, what are you talking about?"
"Oh my gawd, Dave!" She declared in a lower whisper. He strained to hear her. "It's Strauss!" She paused. He looked unfazed. She continued onward as if in the attempt to make him react. "She's here."
Although, he did not care of the whereabouts of their Section Chief, he used her appearance as an advantage. "Penelope, sweetheart, the quicker we buy this wallet, the quicker you can get away from her."
Penelope quickly accepted. "Let's go!" She grabbed Dave's hand and practically drug him to the checkout point.
Although, Erin Strauss, had not yet noticed that two of her engaged charges were fraternizing outside of work, Penelope continued to watch her as if that would prepare in the case that they were recognized.
Curious about her strange behavior, he asked. "Bambina, the fraternization rules were relaxed, remember? Why are you concerned that she is here?"
"No reason." She stated before she repeated unnecessarily. "No reason at all."
He sternly said her name. "Penelope."
She ignored him. "On my code!" She declared as she watched Erin talk to the amused sales lady as she held a beautiful designer dress.
Dave prompted her to explain, "Penelope?"
"Dave," She gasped and swallowed as she tugged on his elbow. He looked down at her. She whispered. "Look, the devil wears Prada!"
Dave contained the grin that he wanted to unveil, but instead he looked to where Penelope was gawking and found Strauss holding a dress from the Spring Collection of Prada. Erin looked around as if looking for someone and when she met eye contact with him, the grin burst across his mouth. She then met eye contact with Penelope.
Horrified that that they were spotted, Penelope rushed out of the department store squealing and repeating in shock. "Prada!"
Observing what had occurred with the BAU's Technical Analyst and Co-Communications Coordinator, Erin quirked an eyebrow at Dave before she followed the again amused sales woman.
He shook his head in amusement as he signed his name on the credit card receipt. The checkout point woman smiled at him as she handed him back his card then the wallet securely in a beautifully designed recycled shopping bag. "Sir, your wife has such a wonderful sense of humor."
He did not correct her on her assumption of his relationship with Penelope, but he replied. "Thank you."
He caught up to his hyperventilating fiance. He grabbed her hand and they began to walk. After several moments, she squealed his name. "Dave," She paused dramatically. "She wears Prada!"
"Yes, I know." He replied before he unthinkingly added. "She has for some time." She stopped walking which made him stop. She stared at him. He stared back. He added. "What?"
"How do you know that she wears Prada?" She asked disdainfully.
He opened his mouth to reply, but thought better of it. He paused and swallowed.
"Well?" She asked as she tilted her head to acquire eye contact. She stared into his eyes before she noticed that his eyebrow was slightly quirked. He quickly looked away from her as if guilty of something. His mouth was set in a stern crooked line. She deduced why he silently refused to answer her questions. She literally bit her tongue before she stated. "Never mind," She forced herself to smile at him. "I don't need to know."
She grabbed his hand and began to walk. He walked in step with her grateful that she had recanted her questions about Erin Strauss. However, grateful as he was, he initiatively prepared himself for the time when she would renounce her recant and want answers. Fortunately, for them all three, she was satisfied with being blissfully naïve to those answers.
Note: I used the Bing Online Translator to translate what I had wanted Dave and Pen to speak in Italian and French, so if either the Italian or French are incorrect, please let me know the correct words for what was spoken and I will edit them. Thank you for reading!