ILuvPurple16 and Suicune95 Present


The Trials and Tribulations of Dating as a Mustang


A/N: Suicune95

Hello everyone! Purple and I are back from our little mini-vacation. We decided that we needed a Fullmetal Alchemist fiction, and we came up with this. We hope you enjoy our little one-shot.


Raisa Marie Hawkeye Mustang was a quiet girl. She was the type that wouldn't break the rules or disobey her parents. Now, she had always wanted to break a certain rule, which her parents, more specifically, her dad reinforced on her. Raisa was not allowed to date!

Raisa had never actually told her father anything about dating. She only discussed those things with her mother, because if she did, by any chance, tell her father that she was going on a date, then he would go completely crazy, ground her as punishment and maybe even make her write "I am not allowed to date." on a piece of paper, over 600 times!

However, tonight Raisa was taking a chance at this. She was just going to pleasantly "ask" her father if she could date. There was nothing wrong with that…right?

Well, she's walking towards the family room now to ask her dad. It was just a simple question. Then why did it feel like she was about to tell her father that she was pregnant with some guy's child.

Once Raisa arrived at the living room, she quietly sat down on one of the sofas. Raisa stroked her black hair and her amber eyes blinked a couple times. The living room was quiet. Her father, Roy Mustang was sitting on a recliner with his head hid behind a newspaper. The living room windows were open, so a light chirp of crickets was heard and there was also the soft rhythm of the ceiling fan.

"Daddy, can we talk?" She asked in a sweet voice.

Roy looked up from the paper he was reading on his leather recliner, "Yes, of course Raisa. What do you have on your mind?"

"Um, I was wondering if…maybe you could let me… date?" Raisa asked nervously, afraid of how her dad might react.

Roy's face quickly changed its expression and he began to fold his paper back, slowly, "Out of the question." he replied in the cold voice, which he rarely used, other than at work.

"But daddy-!" She yelled.

"No. I thought I told you before. You. Are. Not. Allowed. To. Date." stated Mustang.

"But I'm old enough dad! Come on, all my friends are dating!"

"No. My decision is final."

Raisa was frustrated now. The conversation wasn't going well. She began fake-weeping and began saying "My daddy won't let me date like all the other girls at school! Who knows? I'll be the only one without a date at senior prom!"

Suddenly, Mustang slightly changed his idea. He said "Alright, you can start dating, as soon as your brother starts dating."

"But dad, Ryan's seventeen and female intolerant!" Raisa yelled, which stopped her fake-weeping.

"That's because he grew up with you…" Roy muttered under his breath.

"What was that daddy?" Raisa asked curiously.

"Nothing, nothing sweetie," Roy responded, glad his daughter hadn't caught him.

"Please Daddy! Ryan is never going to start dating!" Raisa yelled.

"That means you'll never start dating… I like that idea!" Roy replied excitedly.

Riza stood in the hallway, looking at her husband and her daughter debating in the family room. Raisa was just as stubborn as Roy was. But Riza's older son, Ryan was almost the complete opposite of her daughter, but he still shared many traits with Roy. Of course, Ryan's daily schedule was mainly, sleep, school, hockey, sleep, video games, sleep, video games and more sleep. Did she mention sleep?

But, Riza had a different situation to deal with, at the moment.

"For goodness sake Roy, just let the girl date!" Riza said, walking into the room and making her presence known.

Roy opened his mouth to say something but nothing came out. Raisa looked at her mother hopefully with wide amber eyes, "Really mom!"

"I don't see why not, you're responsible enough," Riza replied.

"No." Roy stated again, "I don't want some boy coming in this house and taking advantage of my daughter."

"Please daddy, I'll be really, really careful!" Raisa said, clasping her hands together and giving her father her best puppy dog eyes.

Roy never lasted more than a few minutes of the puppy dog face, "Alright, but we have to meet the boy first, got it."

"Yay!" Raisa yelled, running up the stairs, "I'll go call Tom and tell him I got the A-Okay!"

Roy looked confused for a second, "Tom? She's already lining them up?"

Riza let out a small laugh, "Come on Roy, she's pretty, she's bound to have boys tripping over each other chasing after her!"

"That doesn't make me feel much better," Roy pouted.

Well, that's Roy Mustang as a father. He wasn't as protective with Ryan as he was with Raisa. After all, Raisa was his only daughter.


"He's here, Roy!" Riza yelled from the window out looking at their front yard. It was early evening on a Saturday. The forecast was pretty clear, which meant perfect weather for a date.

"Thanks Riza!" Roy yelled from the living room, "Alright boys, get into position," Roy whispered into his walkie-talkie.

"Roy, you didn't position snipers, did you?" Riza asked, walking into the living room with a threatening expression.

"Mission off boys," Roy muttered into the walkie-talkie.

Shortly afterwards, the ding-dong noise of the doorbell rang, as Roy sulked in the corner.

"Oh, it's him!" Roy jumped up and shoved past Riza to get to the door first. He composed himself for a moment, and then opened the door.

"Hello son," Roy said in his coolest, most threatening voice.

"Um, h-hello s-sir," said the young teenager, stuttering a bit at Roy's threatening demeanor. The boy had spikey brown hair and he was wearing jeans, a striped long-sleeved T-shirt, as well as a pair of rectangular glasses. He noticed that Roy was still wearing his military uniform.

Just then, Raisa ran down the stairs, saving the day, "Hi Tom! I see you've met my dad. Well, don't be shy, come in! Come in!" She yelled, motioning for him to walk in, through the door.

Tom made it about two steps into the entryway before Roy ordered him against the wall.

"Alright son, hands on the wall, and spread your legs out," Roy ordered.

Tom obeyed obediently, and Roy patted him down.

"Son, what is this?" Roy asked, pulling a pen out of Tom's pocket.

"A pen sir," Top answered awkwardly.

"For what, Tom?" Roy questioned, observing the pen closely.

"For writing, sir," Tom replied

"Sure, that's what you want me to think!" Mustang shouted suddenly.

"Sir?" Tom questioned, completely puzzled and sweating heavily. He looked to Raisa for an answer, but she just shook her head.

"I know this is your drug syringe!" Roy exclaimed, paranoid, "You trying to get my baby hooked? Well guess what son, she's above the influence!"

"Dad! It's a pen! You know, those things mom makes you sign paperwork with all day long!" Raisa came yelled, coming to Tom's rescue.

Roy looked from the pen back to Tom for a moment, "Fine, I'll believe you… for now."

"What is with all the yelling?" A voice called from upstairs. There was the sound of feet stomping down the stairs, "Seriously, I just got back from a hockey game, and all I want now is some shut-eye!"

Ryan was Raisa's older brother. He was really tall and he had the same hair color as his father, with his mother's face structure and eyes. Ryan was currently wearing a baggy T-shirt and sweat pants. His eyes were half closed, since he just began seeing the light after the long sleep. Right after Ryan came back from a hockey game, he directly went to bed.

"Ryan! Go back to sleep!" Raisa tried calling before he got down the stairs and caused even more chaos. Too late though, her older brother stood framed in the doorway of the entry hall.

"Who's this dude?" Ryan asked, motioning in Tom's direction.

"This is Tom, my date," Raisa answered.

Ryan looked Tom up and down for a few moments, evaluating him. "Hell no," He said at last, "You're not going out with this poser."

"Well, I say we get to know Tom, don't you?" Roy asked, throwing a glance over at Ryan.

Ryan gave the Mustang signature smirk, "Alright dad. So, Tom, how old are you?"

"Um, sixteen sir," Tom replied.

"Got a car Tom?" Roy asked.

"Yes sir," Tom answered again.

"Planning on doing anything with my little sister in that car Tom?" Ryan inquired.

"Ryan!" Raisa shrieked, "Don't even-!"

"Alright boys, I think it's time these two left on their date, don't you agree?" Riza came into the entry way and made her rescue.

"Thanks mom," Raisa sighed in relief, "Let's go Tom!" Raisa yelled as she dragged Tom out of her hell-hole of a house.

"Um, you didn't tell me your dad was Brigadier General Mustang, otherwise known as the Flame Alchemist," Tom said, as he started his car up, "And that your mother is a sniper in the military,"

"I didn't think it was that important," Raisa replied, "Maybe I should've given you a heads-up."

After a few minutes of awkward silence Raisa's phone began to ring.

"Hold on a second," Raisa said, as she picked up the phone.

"Hi Raisa!" The voice of her father came through the phone, "Could you please put Tom on for a moment?"

"It's for you," Raisa said, handing Tom the phone.

"I forgot to mention before you left," Mustang's cold voice said through the phone, "You hurt my baby, and you're going up in smoke. Got that?"

"Yes sir," Tom replied, swallowing hard.


Raisa sighed in exasperation as her phone vibrated in her pocket for the twentieth time that night. She couldn't enjoy the movie for two minutes without her father calling and making her leave the theater to answer it.

"Be right back," Raisa whispered a quick apology to her date, Tom.

Raisa went into the hallway and picked up the phone.

"Yeah dad, what do you want?" Raisa asked impatiently.

"Just calling to see how you were enjoying yourself," Roy's voice came through the phone.

"Not enjoying this very much actually, because you keep calling!" Raisa replied, "Now will you leave me and Tom alone!"

"But honey, if I did that you might have too much fun," Roy answered, hanging up before she could reply.

Raisa gripped her phone in an angry matter, and then hit the power button.


"She's not picking up!" Roy yelled, minutes later. He began to walk back-and-forth in a line, panicking. "She's not picking up! She's not picking up! She's not picking up!"

"Relax Roy, I'm sure she just got tired of you calling every two minutes," Riza answered, reading her book in a bored manner.

"No! Not possible! Girl's minds aren't that simple!" Roy yelled, "She probably got kidnapped! That's it; my baby got kidnapped by that slimy little weasel! I know I should've sent the private investigator after her! You just had to talk me out of it…"

"Roy calm down, I'm sure she's fine," Riza replied.

"That's it; I'm calling Havoc, Breda, Fuery, and Falman!" Roy exclaimed.


"So, your dad didn't call for the rest of the movie, did he finally cool down?" Tom asked after they left the theater.

"I doubt it," Raisa replied, "I just turned the phone off."

"Do you think he'll go crazy?" Tom asked.

"Without a doubt," Raisa replied.


"Men, do you know why you're here?" Roy asked, pacing up and down the line of men in his living room.

"Frankly sir, no" Havoc answered, lighting another cigarette.

"Yeah, you just called us all up frantically, and said to get over here as fast as possible," Breda added on.

"Well men, I need you to track my daughter," Roy replied.

"Raisa? Don't you think she can take care of herself?" Fuery asked.

"Are you questioning me?" Roy yelled pulling his gloves out of his pocket.

"No sir!" Fuery yelled, standing at attention.

"Good, now go find her and make sure she doesn't do anything stupid," Roy ordered.

"Yes sir!" All the men yelled and saluted.


"I'm really sorry about my dad," Raisa apologized for the tenth time that night, "He's a bit out of control."

"No worries," Tom replied, unlocking his car.

"I just hate the way he ruined our date tonight," Raisa replied, climbing into the passenger seat.

"Really, Raisa, it's alright," Tom assured.

"I just wish there was some way I could make it up to you…" Raisa wondered.

"I know a way you could make it up to me," Tom replied, leaning toward Raisa. He'd almost made it to her lips when a rock sailed through the open car window and hit him in the back of the head.

"Ouch!" Tom yelled, getting out of the car, "What the heck was that?"

Raisa got out of the car too, "What the hell just happened?"

"I bet it's your crazy father!" Tom yelled, "Or your scary brother!"

Raisa blinked a few times, "What?"

"It's probably your whole insane family, just conspiring against me!" Tom continued to yell, "I bet that rock was your darn sharpshooting mother! Though I admit, she's hot for her age."

"What about my mother?" Raisa asked, anger climbing in her voice.

"Or your monster of a father, maybe your crazy brother!" Tom continued to rant.

"Alright, that's it!" Raisa yelled, pulling out a hand gun.

Tom looked completely shocked for a second, "When did you get that?"

"When I was two years old," Raisa replied, "Mom wanted to make sure I was completely safe."

Tom put his hands up in surrender, "Alright Raisa, let's be rational here."

"No! Nobody insults my family like that except for Uncle Elric!" Raisa yelled.

"You're not seriously going to shoot, are you?" Tom asked, starting to feel more confident that Raisa wouldn't shoot.

Raisa took an experimental shot past Tom's head, "Don't under estimate me now."

Tom began to slowly back up as bullets were shot at his feet. She shot one dangerously close to his foot and he turned tail and ran, forgetting he had a car.

That's it! Tom thought as he ran for his life, hot chicks are more trouble than they're worth!

Raisa sighed slightly, "That idiot made me use half of my bullets!" She took out her phone to give her mother a call to come pick her up from the theater.


In the bushes, a short distance away, Havoc high-fived Falman.

"Nice shot Falman," Havoc whispered.

"Yep, we'd better go report to Mustang now," Falman replied.


"Good job men; thanks to you, my daughter has finished her date safely and with no complications," Mustang said, pacing his line of men once more, "Dismissed!"

All the men began walking toward the front door to leave, until they heard a car door slam and they all ran out toward the back door. Roy jumped into his chair and grabbed his newspaper just as he heard Raisa and Riza coming into the house, Riza assuring her daughter that they'd get her more bullets for her hand gun tomorrow.

Roy looked up from 'reading' his paper, "How was your date, princess?"

"Epic failure," Raisa replied stomping upstairs looking annoyed.

Roy waited for her to get all the way up the stairs, then turned and high-fived Ryan, who was lying on the couch.

"We done good dad, we done good," Ryan said, a pleased look on his face.

"That we did son, that we did," Roy answered, smirking.

Riza rolled her eyes at the two boys and walked up the stairs to comfort her daughter.


A/N: ILuvPurple16

HI! Well, Suicune and I have actually been having the idea for this fic ever since Health Class, when they were teaching us about dating safety. Remember to review.

-Purple and Suicune