Dix secondes
Ten seconds. It is really such a short period of time in the grand scheme of life. Ten seconds was all it took. I pointed my wand at the man I loved and whispered those two words that I can never take back; Avada Kedavra. Those ten seconds seem to stretch over lifetime as I watched the emotions pass through his eyes. First came the shock, followed by the hurt, after which came the visage of trahison. Trahison, the look knowing the man you shared your life with is about to take it. The look of ultimate betrayal.
It is true; I did betray Harry's love and confidence. You may doubt I ever loved him, but I will categorically deny that fact. I loved him with all my heart. All the heart a Malfoy, like myself, can have anyway.
I had promised to fight with him and protect him.
I lied.
It is a little thing I like to call self-preservation. My new Lord and Master told me that if I did not kill my beloved Harry, I would die alongside him. I did the only conceivable thing I could and had my ten seconds of glory. I am now famous for killing The-Boy-Who-Once-Lived. Now every morning I wake up to a cold, lonely bed, wishing I had died right along with him.
I stare longingly at the razor on my vanity, wishing harm upon myself. How I desire to just get it over with and end it all so I can be with Harry in the afterlife. But I am not as stupid as I look to think I will be welcomed with open arms, so I take the cowardly way out and continue living.
One day, my cowardice will run out. There is a potion awaiting me in my bedside table, beckoning me to partake in it's sweet , intoxicating death. One day, I will be able to go to my Harry and try to make amends. Soon.