**So here it is: my next SasuNaru story. I really like writing for this pairing; they're so easy to manipulate! Anyways, this will only be two chapters long so it should be finished soon. Enjoy!
Chapter One: Truth
Puddles splashed under Sasuke's feet as he ran through the woods surrounding Konoha. The moon reflected in them rippled, matching the Uchiha's uneasy thoughts. He approached the city wall quickly and turned, keeping his back up against it. It was relatively easy to get his close.
Too easy.
As expected, the familiar wiz of a flying kunai came towards him, pitch upping until he finally ducked, the blade missing his forehead by a few calculated inches. Sasuke ran along beside the wall until he was at the base of a watchtower. He concentrated his chakra into his feet and walked calmly up the wall and joined his attacker in the tower. Sasuke hit him in the neck and the man slumped, out cold.
The outlaw took a moment to glance out at the Village Hidden in the Leaves. The familiar silhouette elicited a faint smile from Sasuke. He looked around, making sure that no one had noticed him before making his way down and into the village.
The streets were silent, even for two in the morning; not even an owl could be heard. Sasuke was fully aware of the noise his footsteps were making. He passed shops, houses and parks. They were all familiar enough for him to know where he was but Sasuke noticed small things that made his hometown distant. One house was yellow, now, instead of blue; half of that balcony was filled with petunias.
Eventually Sasuke found the apartment he was looking for. The roof had been re-done but other than that it was unchanged. The brunet wondered what the inside looked like.
Sasuke jumped from a crate onto the roof of the one-storey part of the building. He tensed, listening, but no one stirred. From there he crawled into the living room window above him as he'd done all those times, years ago.
The room was clean. Very, unnaturally clean. He had never been tidy and there wasn't even a speck of dust on the shelves.
A cloud moved so that Sasuke could see better. He realized that those weren't shelves; they were boxes. Everything that Naruto had kept in the living room was collected neatly into boxes.
Sasuke explored the rest of the house to discover that the rest of the rooms were like that, too. He searched until the only door he hadn't opened was the bedroom door.
The brunet hesitated; he remembered a pact that he'd made years ago.
– Flashback –
"Sasuke; stay out!"
"Why is that, Naruto-koi? What's wrong?"
"I'm not dressed, Sasuke! Let me get changed in peace."
"It's nothing I haven't seen before. There's nothing to worry about."
"You always get a little to touchy-feely when I'm unclothed. I don't like it," the door closed in Sasuke's face. A few silent moments passed.
"Naruto?"
"Yeah?"
"I'll never come into your room unless you say it's okay."
"…Promise?"
"I promise."
The door opened showing Naruto wearing sweatpants and a t-shirt. "Thank you," he said, embracing the older boy.
– End Flashback –
Sasuke wanted to honour that promise to that day but he'd already broken so many; how could one more hurt?
The door creaked open slowly as Sasuke pushed it inward. "Naruto?" He was answered with silence. When the door was all the way open Sasuke could see the whole room was bathed in the white light of the moon.
Sasuke stepped into the room slowly. Nothing had been touched. Nothing had been touched. This room was almost exactly as it had been when Sasuke had left.
He wished he could go back and change everything.
Sasuke sat on the bed which was positioned, as always, under the shadow. He felt the sheets. They were the same ones he'd slept on so many times. Lying down, Sasuke clutched the pillow gently. He felt something underneath it so he sat up again and pulled it out. It was a book, bound in black leather with gold engravings on it. It was a piece of music but Sasuke was never able to learn music. In the bottom right-hand corner was another, smaller engraving. It said "Naruto U." The brunet wondered what was in the book so he opened it to the first page. It help a haiku titled 'Memoirs':
This book is for me
Though it recalls all of you.
Therefore it is us.
From the ink smell Sasuke figured that this one had been the most recent entry. He flipped through to find that none of the other poems had titles. The second one caught his eye so he read that one, too:
Blowing dandilions,
throwing pennies into fountains,
shooting stars.
I wish.
I wish over and over
whenever I can
but it never brings me any closer
to my goal.
To become great; to be remembered
by someone.
To have people remember
something I did.
I want to be the best
and to be respected.
That would change
from who I am now...
Sasuke remembered this one; Naruto had recited it over and over during their Academy days. It's really old, he thought, at least ten years. Sure enough, it was written in Naruto's old, almost illegible scrawl he'd called kanji. It had taken the better part of a year until Naruto's handwriting had improved even under Sasuke and Sakura.
He flipped to the next page. This one's kanji was also pretty bad, but more legible than the last one:
Carefully treading
on small stepping stones.
Trying to get to the other end
of the rushing river.
I don't want to get swept away
like so many others before me.
Trying to get to that promised land
on the other side.
Stop to catch my breath and look ahead.
I see you, reaching out,
egging me on.
An encouraging smile on your face.
I smile back and I know I need to keep going,
to make it to the end.
But you always seem one step ahead
of me.
Eventually I'll get there
wait and see.
We'll smile together; side by side.
Once I cross
these stepping stones.
It reminded Sasuke of their Genin days. He'd always been just that much better than Naruto but the blond had never given up; he'd let his frustration fuel him to do better.
Sasuke missed that.
The next one's kanji was much better and had a date in the upper right-hand corner. "January 16th, 1993." Their first date.
Dare I say it?
Might you know?
How I feel while walking
through this dense, deep snow?
Your hair glistens in the cold air.
Sneak a glance
at your beautiful pale face.
Feel clumsy in your presence,
with your cat-like grace.
These forbidden feelings
I know so well.
They'll keep me here, suspended
in this motionless hell.
Getting nowhere,
with my feelings.
So I'll keep walking
the open wound
of never-healing.
Sasuke was fully committed to reading the whole book at this point. While all of the poems were eye-opening into Naruto's heart only two others stood out to him.
The obvious fear. of
That dangerous silence,
Those subtle movements.
What to make of them?
You like me, you
like me not.
To be, or not to be
with you?
It's not my decision to make.
I've already made up my mind.
But what of you?
You know very well that
subtle doesn't work
on me.
So give me a sign
of love; or rejection.
This obvious fear -
- I know it
Finally recognizable.
The fear of the
unknown.
But what don't I now?
Sadly, I don't know much.
But I think I could live with that
if I knew how you felt
about me.
Sadly,
Agnostics
Shan't
Understand the
Koncept of
Ethereal beings.
So, God, don't help me.
I'll do it myself,
just like everything else.
Sasuke figured that this one was written about the time he had been contemplating leaving. It seems Naruto had anticipated it.
"I'm sorry," Sasuke said before reading another poem. He was sure that Naruto had only written them to guilt-trip him.
close your eyes,
I don't want you to see me like this.
As my soul quickly dies,
No matter how hard I try; I'm such a mess.
clenching my teeth to bear the pain
You tried, but not hard enough.
'Dobe,' you call me, spurs my anger
But it's better than when we met.
then you wouldn't even look at me
and I was all alone.
Hate emanating from the pores of citizens
though they don't know the truth.
The truth is they'd hate me more if they knew.
No girl would want me
I can't even rhyme.
but I don't want any girl, either.
Like I said; they'd hate me more if they knew.
Do you hate me? I don't think so.
But, then again, I don't know a lot.
Your pale skin contrasts your dark hair,
and I can't take it anymore.
Don't watch me falling. Because...
it would only "add insult to injury."
But that's just what they say
And I don't agree with a lot of what
'they' say
Do you know me? Could you watch?
My descent into the fiery pits
of Hell.
Sasuke had always found it funny how Naruto didn't believe in God but believed in Hell.
– Flashback –
"I hate killing," Naruto whispered, shuddering.
"It's not fun but it's kind of our job, Naruto. We need to protect the people."
"That's not what I mean," the blond turned away, frowning.
"Then what do you mean?" Sasuke decided to humor his boyfriend instead of poke fun at him.
"They don't deserve to die?"
"Murderers don't deserve to die?"
"No," there was a pause, "they deserve much worse."
Sasuke blinked, surprised. "Do you think so? As long as they aren't able to hurt innocents again; I'm okay."
"They go to Hell."
"I thought you didn't believe in God."
"I don't. But I do believe in Hell. It's the only way I can sleep at night."
– End Flashback –
There was only one poem left. Glancing out the window, Sasuked glimpse a faint pink light on the horizon. Sunrise was near. Sasuke would have to hide out in Naruto's apartment until the next night. So much for taking him with me, Sasuke signed and turned back to the book.
Blowing dandelions,
throwing pennies into fountains,
shooting stars.
I wish.
I wish you knew
how much I truly love you.
That your hair is my drug
and your eyes pull me in.
Into the darkness you emit.
That I've ended up emitting, too.
Your ebony hair, I used to run my fingers through.
I still love you.
But I can't tell anyone.
Because they'd think me weak.
That even though you broke my heart
I can't say away from you.
Sasuke