Hello my name is Moonflower36. This is my first story, so please no flaming! The characters will be out of character and you may laugh your guts out. You have been warned!

Disclaimer: I don't own Fullmetal Alchemist.

P.S- Sloth is not in this story. Sorry.

And our story starts….

"Father, are you sure you want to ride in your own cart?" Wrath asked.

"Yes. I am perfectly safe- I mean fine, in my own cart," he asked.

"Can we get going?" Lust demanded in the second seat.

"Fine," Wrath said with a small whine.

Envy was a bit skeptical about his driving. He clutched the side and requested, "Take it slow, please."

FIVE MINUTES LATER

"GET OUT OF THE WAY!" Wrath called, flailing his sword in the air while going 80 miles and hour.

"I SAID TAKE IT SLOW DAMMIT!" Envy cried while clutching the side of the cart for dear life.

"Don't tell me how to drive!" Wrath barked.

"When am I going to drive?" Pride asked from the backseat. Poor Pride was strapped down in one of those stupid kiddy seats.

"Never, you're too young!" Wrath reprimanded, being all 'fatherly'.

Pride thought that was unfair, since he was the first Homonculus. He turned his head to Gluttony, who was sitting next to him. "Hey, can you eat my seat?"

"No, it's too weird," he whispered.

Then, he went back to snacking on his garbage can, which, yes, was filled with garbage.

Wrath suddenly ran over a HUGE bump. There was a loud crash on the roof of the small vehicle. It was Greed, or Greedling, strapped to the top of the cart.

"Watch it, Wrath! Why can't I sit in the cart?"

"'Cause you're a newbie. And newbies sit on the roof," Wrath said with a small laugh.

Lust was confused. "How come you're so out-of-character all of a sudden?"

"Because I'm on vacation and not so stressed over running Amestr- ah, crap!"

"What?" Envy cried, almost falling out as Wrath made a sharp turn.

"I left the country in charge of the Flame Colonel, and I just got a vision of what he can do to a country in a week," he groaned.

The other five Homunculi took a minute to picture what it would look like. I cannot tell you what they saw exactly, because it will scar you for life and will ruin our rating.

HOLE ONE

After swinging (and missing) five strokes, Wrath took out his sword and cut the ball in half.

"Five and a half," Father said, keeping score.

Envy was next. He shape-shifted himself into a club. Unfortunately, he used his head to hit the ball and had to do it three times.

Lust simply hit the ball and got in two strokes.

Gluttony tried to eat his club.

Pride wouldn't play until he could ride out of the kiddy seat.

And Greed got a hole in one.

"Not bad for new meat," he said, smirking at his 'siblings'.

"Meat?" Gluttony asked, suddenly very interested.

BACK IN THE CART

This time, it was Lust's turn to drive. Of course, someone had to complain.

"Speed up, Lust! We'll never get to hole two at this rate!" Envy complained. "My grandma drives faster than you!"

"You don't have a grandma!" Lust replied.