Roy had no idea how it happened. The sight of her getting smaller and smaller and looking up at him with those big brown eyes as he ascended into the air made his heart ache, but that had happened many times and it never changed that fact that he still had a job to do. All he knew was that when he came down, medical units were rushing everywhere. Riza Hawkeye had fallen.
Has no one told you she's not breathing?
It had not been a suicide. Being a sniper, she was assigned to the tallest tower to strike down the enemy by air, since the ground attack wasn't nearly as successful. One of the living armors had traced the shots back up to her sniping hole, and fired. Riza Hawkeye had fallen.
Hello I'm your mind giving you someone to talk to
Fuery had been the one to see it first. A medical examiner was giving him something hot to drink and a pill to calm his nerves. He said he would never forget seeing her, seeing her form drop helplessly like a puppet dropped carelessly to the floor. He said she had clung desperately to the last protruding chunk of building hanging limply onto a building frame, clawing her way up ferociously. She had almost pushed herself to the top when the wall separated from its wire skeleton and plummeted downwards. Riza Hawkeye had fallen.
If I smile and don't believe, soon I know I'll wake from this dream
Armstrong had noticed it as well. And with speed and strength possessed only by him, he dashed towards the base of the tower and caught her. He was being examined by a team of doctors who were astounded by his lack of broken bones. Roy only stood there in the midst of the chaos, his feet rooted to the ground and unable to move. He could not believe it. He refused to believe it. It couldn't happen. She would never let this happen. She was too strong, too brave. Riza Hawkeye could not have possible fallen.
Don't try to fix me I'm not broken
A few stray passers stopped for moments to give him looks of pity. Pity he did not need. Why would he? She wasn't dead. She couldn't be dead. It wasn't possible. People died, yes. It was a fact of life. But Hawkeye wasn't a normal person. She was Hawkeye. She was better.
Hello I'm the lie living for you so you can hide
All their screaming and shouts, none of that was real. It wouldn't mean anything. Because Hawkeye wasn't dead. She would yell at them all tomorrow for being so foolish. She had never hit the ground. Armstrong had caught her. There was no proof at all she had been injured. They were all being stupid. She would yell at them tomorrow.
Don't cry
He could somehow feel Havoc tugging at his sleeve and throwing him into the ambulance, even though it wasn't real. Why would it be? There was no reason for him to be in an ambulance. No one was dead. He repeated those words to Havoc. "She's not dead. She's not dead." Havoc just nodded. "'Course she's not, chief. Just get in there, okay?" Roy nodded. As long as he knew, it would be okay.
Suddenly I know I'm not sleeping
A team of examiners crowded around them. They gave him a mask to breathe in. They spoke clearly and slowly as if he were a child. Once he was safely locked in the ambulance one of the doctors approached him. "Riza Hawkeye died five minutes ago in the central city hospital. I'm sorry, Mister Mustang." Suddenly understanding rushed to him. The ambulance wasn't for her, it was for him. They were afraid he would cause a scene when he discovered she was dead. But how? How could this happen? She wasn't dead, she couldn't be dead, even Havoc said so!
Hello I'm still here
One of the doctors shook her head at his silent protests. "It was an unknown disease, not the fall. The shock triggered a reaction. We couldn't save her. I'm sorry." Roy shook his head. This couldn't, it wasn't happening. It just wasn't. Hawkeye, Riza Hawkeye was not dead. She couldn't possibly be dead. It wasn't happening.
All that's left of yesterday
He didn't want to go to her funeral. There wasn't a funeral, because she wasn't dead. But Havoc and Fuery picked him up from his temporary house and took him in an unmarked black car, trailing behind another unmarked black car. Roy shook his head the entire way there, repeating his mantra to everyone who would listen, for the more listeners he had the more it would be true. "She's not dead. She's not dead." Fuery and Havoc merely shot worried glances at each other. Roy was certain that he was right. When Hawkeye woke up she would yell at them.
At the funeral (But it wasn't really a funeral. There couldn't be a funeral if no one was dead.) There were many people Roy did not know. And if he didn't know them then how would Hawkeye know them? But it didn't matter anyway. She wasn't dead. He imagined it must be mandatory for all military personnel, even though it wasn't real. Their blank faces and glazed over eyes told him everything. The infuriated him. None of them could give a damn about her. They could care less that the most beautiful woman, the most amazing person in the world was gone. No, he told himself, she wasn't gone. He then realized he had never told her those things; he had never told her that he loved her. It was no problem though; he would tell her when she woke up. He would finally be rid of the guilt that haunted him for never sharing with her his feelings. He'd tell her when she woke up.
After a few moments of silence, General Grumman stood up in front of the crowd. He began a long speech, the standard speech, one that was reserved for dead military officers. That was pointless, though. Riza wasn't dead. Only a few words from the droning voice stood out to him. "Lieutenant Colonel Riza Margaret Hawkeye", "Outstanding and exemplary officer", "Caring woman", "Sorely missed". None of those were needed though. Riza wasn't dead. It took him a while to realize the shine on the Generals face was from shedding silent tears. Poor man, crying over nothing. It wasn't like she was really dead.
But then a thought struck him. General Grumman was Riza's grandfather. He would know better than anyone. He really, genuinely cared about Riza. He would know if she was dead...
And when the casket passed his head it finally hit him.
Riza Hawkeye had fallen.
Riza Hawkeye was dead.
Riza Hawkeye was gone.
Someone was shouting. Someone was screaming her name, over and over, Roy smiled inwardly, there really was someone who cared about her. But the screaming wouldn't stop. It sobbed and cried and screamed her name over and over until his voice was hoarse and his throat burned. He was the one screaming. He was the only one who cared. Havoc and Fuery and Falman gathered around him, trying to calm him and quiet the scene. But Roy wouldn't stop. He screamed even though he had no voice. He tried to claw his way through the crowd, he tried to get to her, to tell her everything he never told her and never could tell her, because she was fallen, dead, gone.
He finally broke through and got to the black box that trapped his love. One of the officers holding the casket took out his handgun but Roy was too fast. He moved and dived forward, his fist collided with his face but it did not hurt. The man fell and the end of the chest slid back, the hinge falling open and revealing her perfect, pristine form. Her face was pale and cold, her beautiful brown eyes were shut and she was dressed in the standard military dress uniform that she wore only to Hughes's funeral, and now to her own. Now that he saw her, it was final. It was real. He could never go back. She would never come back.
For the first time, Roy Mustang collapsed in tears.
&
"What happened to us, Havoc?" Fuery asked quietly. "Why did it turn out this way?" Havoc turned away from the sight before them and lit a cigarette. "Doesn't matter how it happened, kid." He responded, trying not to give away his voice. "It just happened."
Fuery nodded and brought the sheet over the dead body of Roy Mustang.
&
Rain clouds come to play again
&
