Jimmy Hat
Topanga: Did you bring it? Corey: Bring what? Topanga: You know what...did you bring it?
Corey: Yeah, I did, but it's kind of old, it was Eric's
when he was my age. I don't know if it is good anymore...
(laughter)
Topanga: Let's see it.
Corey: Pulls out used baseball glove from his backpack
Topanga: Hits Corey and says – That's not what I meant.
(laughter) Are you going to grow up and be the man that I crave?
Corey: Sheepishly removes a yellowed condom from his pocket
(laughter)
Topanga: I don't think that is something I want to be a part
of. Let's go to the grocery store.
Corey: We can't do that, everyone is going to see us...
Topanga: Than what are we going to do?
Corey: I've got the rhythm of a fine Casio time piece...
(laughter)
Topanga: I am not going to go there again, you know what
happened last time...
Corey: Well the protestors are gone now, you won't feel
half the shame. (laughter)
Topanga: Corey, I thought we were in a mature relationship
here, maybe I need to find someone else who is more responsible.
Corey: Ok, hold on a minute I will run down to the Kwiky
Mart and buy a 12 pack
Topanga Now that's my man! I'll stretch out while you run to
the store – and don't wear yourself out running there – oh, and
pick-up 6 D cell batteries for "Mr. Shivers!" (laughter)
Corey: Puts on a fake mustache, hat, and trench coat and
mumbles "I hate that "Mr. Shivers" why can't she just sit on a
washing machine like any other woman?" (laughter)
Corey then gets in his car and drives to the Kwiky Mart. Inside
he grabs a loaf of bread, some brake fluid, a frozen pizza, an
Icee, a 12 pack of condoms and a can of anchovies.
Cashier: Can I help you? (Played by Vickie Lawrence) (applause) Corey: I would like to buy this.
Cashier: That's quite the collection you have there. Are you
sure you didn't just want these? She shakes the condoms.
(laughter)
Corey: Condoms? I don't know how those got there – I think
I meant to buy Saltines, my mistake. (laughter)
Cashier: So, I'll just put these off to the side then.
Corey: Mustache falls off – no, on second thought I can use
the condoms as well, add them to my order. (laughter)
Cashier: So you still want the rest of this stuff?
Corey: That's the way my lady rolls. You know how it is!
(laughter)
Cashier: This old bones haven't been rolling for way too long
now, you look a little young to be buying condoms, how are you?
(laughter)
Corey: 35 (laughter)
Cashier: I'd say you are more like half that, aren't you
sweetie? (laughter) Corey: Takes off disguise. Your right, I am 17....but I turn 18 tomorrow. Cashier: Turn around for me, dumpling. Corey: Wha? (laughter)
Cashier: You heard me, turn around for me. Momma always did
like 'em young! (laughter) Corey: What are you talking about? Cashier: Ever been with a G.I.L.F. ? (laughter) Corey: Huh? Cashier: You know, Grandmother I would love to F...(laughter)
Cashier: Oh, momma likes what she sees. Here's the deal,
Corey... put your wallet away, you won't be needing that. I'll
deliver everything to your house in 15 minutes, when I get off,
and then get off again...chuckle (laughter)
Corey: What, ok, I guess if that's the only...way...
Cashier: Now don't lose all your strength little man, Momma's
boy is gonna need his energy!
Corey: Leaves and goes home
Corey: Yells..Topanga, I am back!
Topanga: mmmmgghhhhs...
Corey: Opens bedroom door.
Corey: Topanga! Mr. Feeney! Ghost of Shawns dad! What the!
Cashier: Knock, Knock, time to start pumping!
To be continued!
Topanga: Did you bring it? Corey: Bring what? Topanga: You know what...did you bring it?
Corey: Yeah, I did, but it's kind of old, it was Eric's
when he was my age. I don't know if it is good anymore...
(laughter)
Topanga: Let's see it.
Corey: Pulls out used baseball glove from his backpack
Topanga: Hits Corey and says – That's not what I meant.
(laughter) Are you going to grow up and be the man that I crave?
Corey: Sheepishly removes a yellowed condom from his pocket
(laughter)
Topanga: I don't think that is something I want to be a part
of. Let's go to the grocery store.
Corey: We can't do that, everyone is going to see us...
Topanga: Than what are we going to do?
Corey: I've got the rhythm of a fine Casio time piece...
(laughter)
Topanga: I am not going to go there again, you know what
happened last time...
Corey: Well the protestors are gone now, you won't feel
half the shame. (laughter)
Topanga: Corey, I thought we were in a mature relationship
here, maybe I need to find someone else who is more responsible.
Corey: Ok, hold on a minute I will run down to the Kwiky
Mart and buy a 12 pack
Topanga Now that's my man! I'll stretch out while you run to
the store – and don't wear yourself out running there – oh, and
pick-up 6 D cell batteries for "Mr. Shivers!" (laughter)
Corey: Puts on a fake mustache, hat, and trench coat and
mumbles "I hate that "Mr. Shivers" why can't she just sit on a
washing machine like any other woman?" (laughter)
Corey then gets in his car and drives to the Kwiky Mart. Inside
he grabs a loaf of bread, some brake fluid, a frozen pizza, an
Icee, a 12 pack of condoms and a can of anchovies.
Cashier: Can I help you? (Played by Vickie Lawrence) (applause) Corey: I would like to buy this.
Cashier: That's quite the collection you have there. Are you
sure you didn't just want these? She shakes the condoms.
(laughter)
Corey: Condoms? I don't know how those got there – I think
I meant to buy Saltines, my mistake. (laughter)
Cashier: So, I'll just put these off to the side then.
Corey: Mustache falls off – no, on second thought I can use
the condoms as well, add them to my order. (laughter)
Cashier: So you still want the rest of this stuff?
Corey: That's the way my lady rolls. You know how it is!
(laughter)
Cashier: This old bones haven't been rolling for way too long
now, you look a little young to be buying condoms, how are you?
(laughter)
Corey: 35 (laughter)
Cashier: I'd say you are more like half that, aren't you
sweetie? (laughter) Corey: Takes off disguise. Your right, I am 17....but I turn 18 tomorrow. Cashier: Turn around for me, dumpling. Corey: Wha? (laughter)
Cashier: You heard me, turn around for me. Momma always did
like 'em young! (laughter) Corey: What are you talking about? Cashier: Ever been with a G.I.L.F. ? (laughter) Corey: Huh? Cashier: You know, Grandmother I would love to F...(laughter)
Cashier: Oh, momma likes what she sees. Here's the deal,
Corey... put your wallet away, you won't be needing that. I'll
deliver everything to your house in 15 minutes, when I get off,
and then get off again...chuckle (laughter)
Corey: What, ok, I guess if that's the only...way...
Cashier: Now don't lose all your strength little man, Momma's
boy is gonna need his energy!
Corey: Leaves and goes home
Corey: Yells..Topanga, I am back!
Topanga: mmmmgghhhhs...
Corey: Opens bedroom door.
Corey: Topanga! Mr. Feeney! Ghost of Shawns dad! What the!
Cashier: Knock, Knock, time to start pumping!
To be continued!