Title: Hiccups
Disclaimer: I don't own these Square Enix Characters
Summary: Leon and Cloud are working on decoding the Ansem reports, unfortunately, Leon finds Cloud more than distracting.
Pairing: Leon+Cloud
Warnings: Gay men. OOC-ness?
Info for the confused: This takes place in game. Between the time the Hercules' Cup opens to the time the Hades' Cup opens... hopefully that made sense.
In the KH manga, the Ansem reports are written in some kind of code. Aerith is the only one shown who deciphers/translates them, but since Cloud and Leon came from Hollow Bastion as well, they could helped decipher some of the Ansem reports. Right?
---
When the heart casts off the flesh, where does the body go? Heart and soul are separate, and the spirit remains in the body. But-
/hic/
-can we assume that the leftover body and soul perish? Certainly when-
/hic/
- the heart changes into a Heartless the body dis-
/hic/
-disappears. Howev-
/hic/
Fuck this.
---
Leon specialized in making other people go away. He just had a knack for it. All he had to do was wait until the other person finished talking and say "...whatever" and the other person would usually be too frustrated to continue talking to him, and best of all, leave him alone. He was very good at driving people to the edge of their nerves in frustration.
/hic/
Cringe. Unfortunately, he wasn't used to being the one driven to the edge of his nerves in frustration. His ego didn't allow him to leave his position either. Only he could drive people away. It was his thing. No one else's. Not to mention-
/hic/
-he'd be damned if he left Cloud; the one person he liked being around. Cloud kept to himself just as he did, so they understood each other very well. They gave each other company. It was great to have someone around that understood.
However, for someone that supposedly understood him so well, why wasn't Cloud leaving? Didn't he know that his hiccupping was annoying? Didn't he know that no one in their right mind could possibly give their full concentration to decoding an Ansem report with someone hiccupping in the background? Was Cloud trying to be annoying? Did he want Leon to get angry at him?
/hic/
Maybe... maybe Cloud wasn't leaving because he wanted to... drive Leon away? Was it possible that he was unwanted?
No.
Don't be silly, it wasn't as if Cloud asked to get the hiccups. One can't purposely get hiccups just to spite someone else-
"Squ- I mean, Leon?"
"What?" He didn't notice that he was staring at Cloud intently for the entire time he was calculating whether Cloud or Cloud's hiccups hated him more. It was another one of his habits to have a certain intense glare while zoning out so he didn't have to pay any attention to what anyone said and as an added bonus, the person might also become too intimidated to continue talking and leave him alone.
"…um. I could do my trans- /hic/ - translation in the other room."
Leon did not let the sigh of relief reach his face. Good, Cloud didn't want to drive him away. He was so stupid for even thinking about that. It wouldn't be like him to voice something like this out loud, so instead he changed the subject completely. "Take deep breaths"
Cloud stared at him as if a White Mushroom had just sprouted from Leon's head and started to tap dance; hoping someone would cast Hastega on it.
Unfortunately, Leon was too busy staring back at Cloud indifferently (while inwardly noting how cute Cloud looked when he was puzzled,) to explain himself.
/hic/
Thankfully Cloud came to his senses and realized Leon was talking about his hiccups. So he responded albeit delayed, "Oh. Deep breaths. I tried that a while ago, it didn't help though, as you can - /hic/ see."
Leon snapped back from whatever thoughts he was having about Cloud. "What about water?"
"No, not yet."
Leon promptly got out of his chair and went into the kitchen. There was a clank or two, followed by running water, and sure enough he returned with a glass of water in his hand. He handed it over to Cloud and sat back down next to him.
The blonde thanked him and gulped down the water softly.
He decided that he really should get back to translating his Ansem Report if he didn't want Aerith and Yuffie to get on his back, so he picked up his pen and glanced at the next sentence on the Report.
/hic/
Oh hell no.
He looked at Cloud, who was apparently just as frustrated as he was but in a more expressive manner.
"Sorry," Cloud muttered, face in hands.
"Take deep breaths again." He repeated.
"That doesn't work, but fine, I'll do it again." Cloud filled his lungs and exhaled. Then again, then-
/hic/
Gods, why are hiccups so persistent? Taking deep breathes should work because hiccupping is caused by when the diaphragm becomes irritated and jerks down forcing a sudden intake of air, so taking enough breath in should work. Dammit.
Then he remembered a cartoon he watched with Yuffie when he had to babysit her and occasionally, Cloud at Hallow Bastion. What was it called? Cactuarbob Needlepants? Or maybe it was something else, because that didn't sound right. Whatever. Anyway, his godly memory distinctly remembered a Chocorick and Cactuarbob doing several hiccup cures that included standing upside down and counting from 100, holding one's breath, and scaring the hiccups away. He was positive that holding one's breath would only make the problem worse, but the other two were worth a try. The brunet turned to face Cloud who was currently trying his best to take deep breaths and not hiccup in between.
/hic/
Cloud nearly choked. Well, he actually did choke, but he only coughed once before speaking again. "See? It didn't work-"
"Remember that show we used to watch back when we were kids at Hallow Bastion?"
If Cloud didn't know that although Leon calculated his words carefully before he spoke, the brunet would occasionally over calculated and wandered off to a different tangent that had seemingly nothing to do with the current situation, then the younger man would have probably questioned Leon. But Cloud knew Leon slightly better than other people and although he didn't know how it related to the current situation, he knew that Leon thought it did, and that was enough. "I think so"
Neither of them would be caught dead saying Cactuarbob Needlepants or The Magic Airship out loud, so they assumed that both of them were thinking about the same childhood cartoon.
Leon continued, "I think one of the characters got rid of hiccups by standing on their head."
"I'm not standing on my head" Cloud said flatly. "What about the other way? The-"
"Suprise you?"
Cloud sighed, "How are you going to suprise me if I'm expecting-"
Leon cut him off by capturing his lips with his own, causing Cloud to jump slightly, however the shock wore away after the older man began nibbling on his lip gently. When Cloud groaned, Leon didn't miss the chance smirk into the kiss and slip his tongue in to meet Cloud's. He moaned and pulled Cloud in closer as the blond tilted his own head into a more accessible position and clawed at Leon's back, grabbing tightly to close to space between them.
After they finished ravishing each other, the kiss broke and both men were left to catch their lost breath.
Cloud spoke first, but whatever it was that he said, Leon couldn't process at all. He was too busy processing what had just happened for his mind to concentrate on anything else. He knew that no matter what he didn't want Cloud to leave him. He wanted Cloud to be with him always and no matter what, he would do anything to make sure Cloud was with him as much as possible.
He understood that he could not put this into words so he pulled the blond into his chest, buried his face in those blond spikes and responded with the one thing that has never let him down in any of his situations.
"...whatever..."
Freetalk: I honestly have no idea. ;;;
Other notes:
Cactuarbob
- Spongebob
Chocorick - Patrick
The Magic Airship -
The Magic Schoolbus
Leon is translating the 13th Ansem Report. Cloud is suppose to be doing the 12th one, but that's never mentioned, nor is it important, so sorry for filling your brain with useless information you'll never forget.