Omega

by Michaela Wills

She struggled, pushing as hard as she could with her mind against the other being, the one that tamped down on her senses, locked her away from feeling anything and reducing her to watch with blind eyes what went on around her body with no way to express herself. Sensing her struggle, the other sent a mental damper equivalent to a smack across the face through her senses, sending her reeling.

But it wasn't as strong as earlier, it only made her lose awareness for a moment instead of long minutes. Something was happening and she needed to break free! This other was still more powerful as she, Tomoe Hotaru, pressed against everything that held her away from the world.

What was everyone saying about me before . . . That I am a Sailor Senshi also. If I was a senshi, I could break free, I know I could. But I don't know how to use that power. And what of the Outer Senshi, who tried to keep me from living? Are they right? Or is Sailor Moon?

The other Outers fear your power because of it's past circumstances.

Who, who is that?

I am the part of you that they fear, I am your past and your awakening to the power within you. You could say that I am the spirit of Sailor Saturn from the past. Once you and I join in all respects, you will be able to change form and be who you once were. In a sense, I am your memory.

Why do they fear letting me be a senshi? I am on their side.

They fear your greatest power. The ability to anhilate a planet. Because the choice to use that power rests on your shoulders alone, you are the last unborn. The meaning in that is the spirit and power of Saturn will not awaken within you until the most dire of circumstances, where destruction was unaviodable.

But I don't want to destroy the planet, I want to help Sailor Moon save it! And Chibi-Usa! An-and Poppa!

Which is why you must break free, and now I can let you remember and do so. Awaken Sailor Saturn, do what you must. Remember!

The voice faded as Hotaru remembered. The hateful past, the struggling and the sudden pain that caused her to awaken a thousand years before. The beautiful world that she gave up, finishing the destruction that was begun so life could start anew. The death that stood to be her consquence for her power.

She pushed and shoved the demon, hard. She heard it cry out as it lashed out at her. She had to win, she must win. It yelled physically, though the words echoed in her mind endlessly.

She hit the surface of the abyss that she'd been forced to.

"No! No!" She felt the evil thing pulling again. It still maintained a thin layer between her and total control of her body. Keeping the black star and altered maturity intact. There had to be a way to destroy it without killing her body, she had to force it out! Wracking her mind, she tried to figure out a way to force the demon away, but none would come. It was deeply enrooted in her.

"I have . . ."

She cried out inside, she needed to free herself of it! Seemed to be attached to her body, she couldn't kick it out, even though she had more control of her distorted shell. The evil thing had changed her body . . .

That was it! Her Sailor Saturn form! She had to become the other form, but how? Would it still stay with her if she changed? Wait! Destruction! What if she destroyed this body, splitting it from the inside as she transformed?

"Beloved ones!" She cried out, SATURN PLANET POWER, MAKE UP! She screamed internally. The signal lit brightly on her forehead, shining out to the surface as she allowed herself to slip a little deeper inside. The powerful violet aura from her distant past lit the inside of her physical shell violently. Willing her energy in all directions, she stretched her body, she suddenly drove it apart, shattering the body that had harbored her soul and that evil entity. But she still had a body, and it did not.

Grabbing the freed heart crystal before it too shattered, Hotaru left the area physically. She had to save Chibi-Usa! Her transformation was still incomplete. Though finished in spirit and not phyiscally, she had a few more moments before she'd be confinded the the laws of nature again. As she left, she could here Sailor Uranus murmuring in awe.

"Omega Sailor Recovery."

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Authors Notes and Disclaimer:

Disclaimer: I don't own SailorMoon or any of the show's other characters. They belong to Naoko for her manga and other companies for their renditions and products. I'm only using these characters for my enjoyment and the enjoyment of other fans and I don't mean to infrindge on any copyrights.

AN: The episode that I describe in 'Omega' is 125, where SailorSaturn both awakens and destroys Pharaoh 90. I wanted the create another view of Hotaru's struggle and the death of the entity Mitress 9 as well as my own redition of the technique that Saturn uses to free herself, which Uranus in awe referred to as "Omega Sailor Recovery".
-Michaela