"Aw." I said and sighed, closing my book.
"What?" Dave asked looking up from the novel he had his nose in all period.
"It was such a cute story." We laughed as I rested my head on my desk.
I closed my eyes. I was so happy summer was here. I would be around people who didn't judge me. I would still have Dave as a friend, Alicia I told yesterday and is totally cool with it. In fact, she's Bi too. I thought about Sam, Mandy and Chrissie and I sighed mentally. I would lose more people then I would keep. But I was okay with it. If they didn't love me for who I was I wouldn't pretend to be something else to please them. Yet I still couldn't help but feel conflicted about losing them.
They can all go to hell, The little voice in the back of my head stated, you can't change who you are.
I nodded and lifted my head back up as the bell rang. I got up, grabbed my book and handed it to Lizzie.
"You'd like it. Keep it." I said smiling. "Have a great summer." She hugged me. She felt so frail. I could see that she was very sick.
"Thanks deary. You too!" She smiled and tucked the book in her purse. "Come on Nikki." She looked back at a little brunette in glasses that reminded me of a mouse. She was timid and rarely spoke to anyone besides Lizzie. But she seemed like a bubbly person underneath her shy exterior. I grabbed my songbook and agenda of my desk.
"You okay?" Ashley said leaning up against a row of lockers as I left my 4th period class. She glanced at Dave who was walking the other direction. "You're awfully quiet today."
"Yeah. I've just been thinking about a lot." I readjusted the books in my hands. "I'll tell you about it eventually."
"Okay." She said as we walked down the stairs. I rolled my eyes and smiled. Ashley was never one to pry into someone's business especially when it didn't involve her. She stuck to talking about her various boys and her many issues with them all.
"So how's Dave?" I said laughing and nudging her gently. She blushed which made her freckles turn purple.
"He doesn't know I exist." She said laughing.
"He does too!" I said. "Look." I said gesturing to Dave, now in front of us courtesy of him always had to take the other set of stairs. "Dave!" I called and he turned around. "What are you doing this summer?" I asked.
"Nothing." He said closing his book and walking towards us.
"Ugh!" I said rolling my eyes. "You two are so boring." I said spinning around. "Do me a favor? I have plans this summer where loser here has nothing to do as well. Keep her out of trouble please. And far away from the pricks she seems to date." I turned to look at Ashley and blew her a kiss and winked.
"Sure thing Meems." He smiled at me and then at her. His eyes lingered on her for longer then they should've.
"I'll text you her number." I said smiling.
"Okay. See you two soon." He said walking away. As soon as he was out of ear shot Ashley attacked me with a hug.
"You are the best!" She squealed happily. "And the most amazing improv actress ever." She added laughing.
"Thank you." I said walking into the cafeteria and sitting down. Jaylyn, Alicia and Adelina were already there as we sat down. I felt a pang of discomfort in my stomach as I noticed that Chrissie was sitting next to our group. She was bad news. Chrissie was my best friend until I became friends with Angel. She's Jehovah's Witness and hates all LGBT people and anyone who accepts them. I now fit under the LGBT group which means any possibility for fixing our friendship is screwed.
"So I heard Alec is totally crushing on that 6th grader. What's her name Grace I think?" Alicia gossiped.
"Graciana." Adelina said.
"Yeah, her too." Alicia continued. "Anyway, they are such a cute couple. I mean in this year's show, they played opposite each other. How perfect?" I laughed.
"They are totally perfect. They dated twice." I informed her.
"Shut up!" She screeched.
"She broke his heart but I think he still likes her. Or at least I hope he does. They are way cute together." Ashley said smiling.
"I say they end up together." Jaylyn said.
"I say they date again but she breaks his heart again." I said. "I still think he's gay." I said in a sarcastic voice.
"No way!" Alicia said.
"I'm kidding." I laughed. "He's too, I don't know, straight." I said as Angel sat down next to me.
"I agree. Not to mention he hates fags." Chrissie laughed and leaned into our circle of friends. "I mean who doesn't? The idea of a girl being with a girl or a guy with another guy is just disgusting." She spat at Angel.
"I don't." I said grabbing Angel's hand. "Some of my closest friends are gay." And I'm bisexual. I thought. I bit my tongue. Now wasn't the right time. "And the 'F' word is disgusting. It's like me calling Jo the 'N' word."
"Relax Mimi." Chrissie said rolling her eyes and settling back in her seat. "God will decide in the end. Right Angel?"
"Leave him alone." Adelina said.
"Oh I'll leave him alone." Chrissie said grabbing her mirror out of her bag. "But God wont." She said running a blush brush over her cheeks.
"Aw come on!" Rob said sitting down next to me and kissing my cheek. "You're having another 'God vs. Gays' debate baby?" I nodded.
"You sure you're not gay Mimi? You seem to be very pro-homosexuality." Chrissie said raising her eyebrows at me.
"She's dating Robert." Angel said.
"So you're Bi then?" Chrissie asked pointing her finger at me.
"Just because she's not gonna hate someone means she's Bi?" Rob asked grabbing my hand. "You're pathetic." I kissed his cheek. He knew I was Bi. I told him when he asked me out.
"Wait. So let me get this straight," Adelina began, coming back into the conversation, "God hates someone for loving someone else and not being afraid to show it to the world."
"What they do isn't love." Chrissie said snickering. "It's a sin."
"I'm sorry where in the Ten Commandments does it say 'Thou shalt not love thine of the same sex'?" Alicia asked. A Gay rights argument was the only topic she could talk about seriously and without a blonde moment.
"Well…" Chrissie said twirling her hair and glancing around.
"And will God judge us for loving or you for hating?" Angel asked.
"Well…" She said again.
"You know it does say in the bible if you work on the Sabbath you can be put to death?" I looked at her outfit: Jeans and a pro-Jesus shirt. "And you're wearing denim and a cotton shirt so you're going to hell. That's Leviticus 19:19. Oh, and if you've ever argued with your parents they can stone you to death. Wait but that would make them murders which is another sin which means they're screwed too." I informed her. I loved getting in these fights because I always had my facts lined up, waiting. Angel smiled at me and winked. I told him a week ago that I was Bi. He, of course, was cool with it and promised not to tell anyone. "The bible is a huge contradiction that makes no sense." I added.
"It says there's a magical man watching us, dear, of course it's not gonna make sense." Rob added.
"Wait a second." Chrissie said. "You can kill for God." She started to "school" me. "You are exempt from punishment if it's in the name of our Lord." Angel started laughing hysterically.
"Oh sweetie." He said laughing. "I have one thing to say to that: 9/11." He looked her dead in the eyes and she shriveled into her chair.
"That's different." She replied. "They have the wrong God. They went to hell for what they did."
"How the hell do you know you're right? That your God is the right one?" Adelina said laughing. "Just go back to what you're good at. Go look pretty, dear."
"Whatever." She said turning back towards her new group. She looked once more over her shoulder and said one last thing before she turned around completely. "You're all going to hell in a hand basket." I looked at Angel and he shrugged.
"Well I already designed my hand basket and pre-ordered furniture for it." He said laughing. "What do you think of a pink leopard print couch?" He said looking at me. I laughed and smiled.
"It sounds perfect." I said. "Mine had a stage in it." I laughed.
"Why are you going to hell?" Jaylyn asked.
"Oh, a lot of reasons." I said sighing as Rob squeezed my hand. I looked up at him and smiled. He kissed my head. This summer was gonna be a long one.