I've had many people ask me to write a harem story featuring Lincoln's classmates or just girls his age in general, and now I've finally caved in. I'll keep commentary brief (there's not much to this story beyond what you'd expect lol), but one note I want to make is this story features the character known as Shy QT. I've given her a name below. You'll know it when you see it.
It was the last month of the school year, and Lincoln Loud couldn't remember the last time he had smiled.
He supposed it was natural; at the end of the year, everyone is tired and annoyed. The teachers realize that they were far behind on their syllabuses, and started rushing through material and dumping mountains of homework on their students. Exams were visibly around the corner, so close that people could smell the printed pages and the warm ink swimming on them. Summer vacation was so tantalizingly close, but still so far, and the heat of the sun would flood into classrooms and knock out the many sleep-deprived students.
But for Lincoln, there was more going on in his life that put him on edge. He couldn't help but get the feeling that his friends were giving him the cold shoulder lately. Every time he'd ask Rusty or Zach to hang out, they were busy hanging out with their girlfriends. Their girlfriends! Lincoln was happy for them, but how the hell did they get girlfriends before him? And why would they not even give him time of day anymore because of their dates?
The fact that he was surrounded by girls he couldn't date was also a problem.
He loved his sisters, he really did, and he knew they'd never intentionally do anything bad to him. But, because of them, his daily schedule had become waking up in the morning to wait in a long line to use the bathroom, then to jump in the shower and nearly catch hypothermia due to the cold, pour a bowl of cereal only to realize the milk ran out, dodge flying projectiles in the bumpy car ride to and from school, get no homework done because he needed to paint Lori's nails, model for Leni, carry Luna's equipment, get pied by Luan, re-inflate all of Lynn's popped footballs, help Lucy with morbid poetry, chase off Lana's pets, chase off Lola herself, make sure Lisa wasn't about to blow up the house, and change Lily's diaper when she wandered into his room after an accident.
All of that without a single 'Thank You.'
"Maybe that's just how life is in a big family," Lincoln sighed. "I guess I don't thank my sisters for everything they do for me as well. Still, just once in a while would be nice..."
Lincoln wasn't even mad at his sisters, or his friends, or his teachers. He was just depressed. He couldn't muster up the energy to be angry if he tried. All he could do was sigh and pray for the day when he would take that permanent nap… but that day wouldn't be today, because Lincoln had some duties to attend to that just made him feel even shittier.
Student Council.
"I'm not even that important on the team," he grumbled to himself as he walked down the hall towards their usual meeting room. "Why can't Girl Jordan just let me skip for once? She's so demanding, damn."
When he got to the Student Council's specially reserved room, he looked inside, hoping that everyone else wasn't in there. If they were, that would mean he was the last one to make it, and that would earn him a scolding.
He counted the heads. Standing in the corner was the school news reporter, Cristina. He had a bit of a crush on her, but after creeping her out so badly that she frikkin' moved, he decided to tone it down. Technically, she wasn't even supposed to be in that room, but her friendship with everyone else and her position with the school paper gave her special access.
Besides her, seated at the semi-circle desk all student council members sat at, was Stella, the secretary. She was easily Lincoln's best friend in that room. She was fun, energetic, friendly and really casual. Lincoln appreciated the fact that, out of everyone in his group of friends, she was the only one that tried not to blow him off.
Besides her was the treasurer, Shay. She was a real shy cutie, with long bangs covering one of her eyes. She and Lincoln didn't talk much, but that was mostly because she rarely talked at all. She reminded him of Lucy; two deeply timid, deeply emotional people that loved to cover it up by any means necessary.
Then there was the vice president, Mollie. Lincoln scowled lightly, because Mollie was a bit of a bitch. Okay, that was the depression talking. They were friends, he guessed, but the young brunette took joy in mocking and berating Lincoln all the time. She'd always come up with some difficult challenge, due to her dedicated belief that she was his 'rival'. She was abrasive to everyone, though, and a few talks with her did bring them a little closer. Not close enough to make Lincoln wish she'd transfer to another school. On another continent. Under a dictator's regime.
Finally, there was the President of the student body herself. The one, the only, Girl Jordan. Girl Jordan had run a dedicated campaign in pursuit of her political ambitions, and won by a landslide. She was admired by nearly everyone, and Lincoln was no exception. She was beautiful, intelligent, fashionable and had the bite to match her bark. What Lincoln respected most about her was that she held herself to the same standards as she did other people. If she were late, she would apologize profusely and refuse to forgive herself.
Of course, she wasn't late this time. He was.
Lincoln sighed. "As if things couldn't get any worse."
When he walked through the door, he tried to hide his unhappiness. He put on a pained smile, straightened his back to the best of his ability, and tried to speak with a more upbeat tone. "Hey, everyone. Sorry I'm late."
All eyes were on him, and he could clearly see Mollie grin. "Oooh, someone's in trouble now."
He was, probably. And he knew his position as a mere representative wasn't going to shield him.
His eyes turned to Girl Jordan, and he flinched lightly under her gaze. Her eyes were a stunning shade of emerald green, and in her lighter moments, they were soft and easy to get lost in. They were almost maternal, or maybe the eyes of a close loved one. When she first saw Lincoln walk in, her irises narrowed, almost as pointed as daggers, but the more she looked at the boy, the more they seemed to soften.
"Lincoln… is everything alright?"
"What? Y-yeah, of course they are. Why wouldn't they be?" he chuckled, trying to deflect suspicion.
"You, uh, just seem a little… you know what? I want you to take the day off. Go find something else to do."
Everyone gasped, surprised. Since when was Girl Jordan this lenient with people? Where was the yelling, the ranting, the barking orders to go do this and find that and solve this? Why was she going so easy on him? Lincoln wanted to ask, but he decided not to bite the hand that was feeding him.
"Sure, I'll do that. Uh… thanks," he said, stepping back out of the room. He closed the door behind him, and paused for a moment in the hallway, a look of pure confusion etched on his face. He glanced back, and lifted himself on his toes to look through the window, where he found Girl Jordan staring at him through the window with a knowing smirk. She lifted a piece of paper with 'Go home, Lincoln' written on it. He chuckled stupidly, before dropping himself on the ground and rushing down the hall. He could feel tears stinging at his eyes, and he wanted to sing.
Finally! The world's going a little easy on me!
Back at the council room, Girl Jordan elegantly put the slip of paper down, and looked up to see the other girls staring at her, mouths agape. The sandy haired girl had to bite down on her lip to keep from laughing at their expressions. "From the way you're all looking at me, I think you all want to ask me something?"
"Yeah. How come you just let Lincoln go like that? You never let any of us leave early!" Mollie said.
"That's true. This could be a big news story. President of student council losing her authoritative touch… maybe there'll be a coup," Cristina gleefully noted, scribbling notes down in her notepad.
"If there's a coup, then I want to be VP!" Stella exclaimed.
"I knew you were after my job! Come and take it from me!"
"Why wouldn't you want to be the actual President?" Cristina asked.
Stella's cheeks reddened. "Whoops. Forgot that was an option."
"Are you all done now?" Girl Jordan asked, quickly getting annoyed with her staff. She pointed at Shay with her thumb, who had been sitting quietly, working on her notes the whole time. "Why can't you guys be more like Shay? Shay never gives me a headache."
"Oh, I'm so sorry, Girl Jordan," Stella immediately apologized, earning a scoff from Mollie.
"Stop being a kissass, Stella."
"That sounds like a breaking news headline. 'Stella Chang, Corruption, and Depraved Sexual Tastes Involving Ass.'"
"Why do we even let you in here?" Stella growled at Cristina, who simply shrugged.
"Okay, guys, let's back on topic. I want you guys to cancel everything you have planned for today, because we're about to have an impromptu meeting about Lincoln."
"Boy, we're really breaking the Bechdel test, huh?" Mollie joked, earning a few light laughs.
"I'm serious. Didn't you guys notice how… depressed he looked? I swear, when I first saw him walk in, I thought I was looking at a zombie. I think there might be something wrong with Lincoln."
"What do you mean? What's his problem?" Stella asked.
"I don't know, and that's the problem. We can't really solve a problem if we don't know what it is. Maybe it's something at school or at home or somewhere else or a mix of all of that… but the point is that he looks like he's been having a bad time. We should talk to him about it."
"I don't think that'll work. He really doesn't like putting his problems on others. He just kinda… deals with it himself."
A collective silence fell over the group as Girl Jordan pointed that out. The girls, even Mollie, seemed disturbed by the notion. They would gladly take part in joking about their albino classmate, and teasing him and making him do all sorts of chores for them, but in the end, they did it because they were his friends. No healthy friendship ever involved two people sitting around all huggy and kissy.
And because they were his friends, they began to slowly realize that Girl Jordan was right. They did notice that he seemed less enthusiastic lately. He was slow and lumbering, with his back sometimes hunched and an empty, sad look in his eyes.
"You're right. What can we even do for him, though?" Mollie asked. "Throw him a surprise party to cheer him up? I mean, I can get a cake and balloons if you want."
"I don't think that'll work," Stella said, putting her hand on her chin to think. "What Lincoln needs is something a lot more meaningful and deep than a slice of cake. We need to make some kind of effort to connect to him."
"Well, you probably know him best," Girl Jordan pointed out, feeling an odd stab in her heart as she said that. "What do you think he needs?"
The Filipina stroked her chin as she scanned her memories, thinking about every conversation she'd had with her friend recently. While Lincoln maintained a positive attitude most of the time, he would occasionally slip up and say something that hinted at what was bothering him. She remembered how, at the park the other day, he muttered something under his breath about how lonely he'd feel during the car ride home. Another time, in class, she looked over at Lincoln's notebook for answers to their homework, and found the young man drawing a beautiful woman in the corner, looking at his sketch with the longing of a long-lost lover.
"I think… I think Lincoln might be lonely," Stella concluded, opening her eyes.
"Why would he be lonely? He has us, and a whole army of sisters at home," Mollie said.
"Not that kind of lonely. This is a more special kind of lonely. I think… I think Lincoln really wants a girlfriend."
"Oh, that's sweet," Girl Jordan cooed.
Shay said nothing, but she clutched her hands together romantically, pressing them against her smooth cheek.
"So Lincoln needs us to set him up with a girl… I don't know about that. He is a little… creepy," Cristina cringed. She would never forget that video of Lincoln combing his chest hairs and puffing them out for a photo of her to smell. It made her skin crawl and toes curl just thinking about it.
"You're right. He doesn't really interact with new girls well. Take it from me, I know," Stella laughed. "He and his friends all went goo-goo gah-gah crazy for me when I first laid eyes on them. It was pretty funny, looking back. But yeah, we can't just set him up with any random girl. He needs someone he knows. Someone whose already kinda close to him. Someone like..."
"Someone like us," Girl Jordan said in a hushed whisper.
"U-Us?" Mollie stammered, quickly getting to her feet. Her face was visibly turning into a bright red star. The thought of her and Lincoln together… the image of an adult Lincoln sweeping an adult her off her feet popped into her mind. They were both dressed in… in… wedding clothes…
"Guess so," Girl Jordan shrugged. "Well, since none of you want to do, I guess I'll have to step forth as tribute and..."
"Hold on. I never said I wouldn't do it," Stella said. "I'd be happy to date Lincoln. Honestly, I do have a bit of a crush on him..."
Dang it, Stella, why? Girl Jordan thought in despair. "O-Okay, fine, it'll be between me and Stella. If anyone else wants to say anything about our plan to get Lincoln to date one of us..."
A small, shaking hand rose out of the corner of Girl Jordan's eye. The four girls turned their heads to look at Shay and her trembling hand. She flinched as they stared at her, clearly not one for the spotlight.
"Do you like Lincoln too, Shay?" Girl Jordan asked. The shy girl gave a soundless nod, her pale face quickly reddening, and she looked down to the ground to avoid anymore eye contact.
"Alright, you know what? Since it's clear that three out of five of us want to be with Lincoln, so I'm going to make a presidential decree. All of us are going to take turns with him!"
"All of us? As in, me?" Mollie asked, pointing at herself.
"Yes, Mollie. Even you. I'm not asking much."
"You're asking me to start… shipping myself, for lack of a better word, with Lincoln. Lincoln! You know, the dorky kid that we put up with because the only other person who wanted to be representative was his gross friend Clyde..."
The whole room shivered at the name. So… much… nosebleed…
"He's scrawny, he's wimpy, he's into weird comic books and probably pervy Japanese stuff too. I just can't see myself with him. It's weird and… and..."
Well, Mollie wasn't telling the full truth. The truth is that she did feel something for Lincoln, as much as she didn't want to admit it. The reason that she always begged him to come over to Girl Jordan's pool parties wasn't because she wanted to cannonball with him. It was because whenever she saw him strutting around in his tight speedo, which pressed against his crotch and revealed every inch of his manliness… she would need a pool just to cool down.
"Look, Mollie, I don't know what goes on between you and Lincoln, but I do know that you two are friends, in some twisted way. Think about everything good he's ever done for you, and realize that that kind boy is suffering right now, and you can help him feel better. So come on, Mollie, do it for him."
"Alright, fine," she said quietly, crossing her arms.
Girl Jordan smiled at her, and turned to the final stand of resistance. The redheaded reporter looked at her, and bit on her lip lightly. "So… if I do this for Lincoln, are you sure he's going to get better?"
"I can't make any promises, Crissy. All I know is that if he feels like the girls around him love him, then that'll definitely help with his stupor."
"Fine, I owe him that much. Plus, this will be a good opportunity to teach myself about an important skill in the field. Plenty of female reporters have to seduce and screw the truth out of men."
"WHOA! No one was talking about sex!" Stella exclaimed. Shay looked like she wanted to die right there and then.
"It's how I do things," she smirked, puffing her carmine hair daintily.
"Do whatever you want. The point is that we're all doing this to make Lincoln feel good again. We each take our turn with him, and whatever happens happens. Sound like a plan?"
Everyone nodded, and Girl Jordan smiled. "Perfect. Now, I think it's only appropriate we go in order."
"Agreed. So Cristina goes first and Girl Jordan, as the highest ranking, goes last," Stella said with a beam.
"Th-that's not what I meant," Girl Jordan feebly protested, before hanging her upset head. "But fine, we can do it that way if you want..."
These girls just stole your chance to be Lincoln's first. I say we kill them! JFK-style!
You again? I thought therapy got rid of you.
Girl Jordan had a bit of a problem with her internal monologue, you see. But it didn't matter. As Girl Jordan started ranting at her other mental voice, Cristina looked to the door and what lay beyond. Her thoughts turned to what she'd be doing tomorrow...
Her heart started pounding.