SPOILERS: This Year's Girl.

He slept with her.

"You. I slept with you."

It wasn't me. Why couldn't he look into her eyes and know it wasn't me? Why didn't he stare at me and realise that it wasn't really me looking back at him?

Can't he tell the difference between me and some psycho, murderous bitch?

Jonathan says I need to forgive him. I know that. I know all it would take is me holding him and saying I forgive. I know all Riley needs is reassurance.

It wasn't me.

"I love you."

But it wasn't me. Why didn't he know? It wasn't me. Wasn't me lying there. Wasn't me looking back. Wasn't me hearing him profess his love.

If it had been Angel, he would have known.

I would have known.

"I love you."

I wonder what she said back. "I know." Maybe she just smiled. Maybe she kissed him. Does it

matter, Buffy? Stop torturing yourself, that's what I'm telling my brain, stop this torture, but I

can't stop thinking about it.

"I love you, Buffy."

It wasn't me.