Snape marches briskly into a classroom full of 3rd years, looking menacing. The 3rd years stop their chatting immeadiately and face forward. Snape hardly notices. Instead he wrenches open a filing cabinet, grabs a fat wad of papers and slams them on his desk so hard that it knocks over a cup full of quills and causes several 3th years to jump.
Snape places one hand on either side of the papers and glares. He hunches his shoulders, like a greasy black panther observing his prey. "Pathetic," he snarls, looking at each student in turn. "One would think, after three years of trying to squeeze some glimmer of knowledge into your brains that you would AT LEAST be able to form a coherent sentence."
The class shifts restlessly as Snape pauses. His shoulders twitch dangerously.
"NO! INSTEAD I'M LEFT TEACHING A BUNCH OF IDIOTS THAT CAN'T EVEN SPELL!" Snape slaps the desk hard and the tower of paper collapses. Papers slide all over the desk, some on the floor. Snape grabs a papers at random. He quickly glances at each one and flings them aside. "DITTANY IS NOT SPELLED 'D-Y-T-A-N-I'. A BOZOAR'S MAIN PURPOSE IS NOT TO PREVENT PIMPLES. AND THE PROPER WAY TO OBTAIN DRAGON'S BLOOD IS NOT TO 'RUN AT IT WITH A POINTED STICK'! AND MISS COLLIERS, FOR THE LOVE OF MERLIN IF I SEE THAT YOU HAVE WRITTEN ON YOUR HOMEWORK ANY MORE VARIOUS ALLUSIONS TO YOU MARRYING OR HAVING IT OFF WITH HARRY JAMES 'GOING TO SAVE THE SODDING WORLD BY BEING A BLITHERING IDIOT' POTTER, I WILL PERSONALLY MAKE SURE THAT HIS BOLLOCKS WILL BE PAINFULLY REMOVED AND USED IN A SHRINKING SOLUTION!"
Snape starts to shred the papers and flings them about the room. A few brave students look towards Miss Heather Colliers, who is presently slipping down underneath the desk, face blazing as red as a Weasley's hair.
"WELL THAT IS IT! YOU WILL ALL RE-WRITE YOUR ESSAYS AND I EXPECT AN EXTRA FOOT BY NEXT LESSON OR SO HELP ME YOU WILL ALL BE IN DETENTION FOR A MONTH RECITING ONE THOUSAND TIMES "I AM A WIZARD, NOT A TROLL WITH BRAIN DAMAGE!"
Snape gives a glowering look to the petrified students. Suddenly, it's very apparent there is a dripping sound coming from within the classroom that wasn't there before. The class looks towards the jars of potions ingredients, suspecting that Snape's magic had gotten out of control during his rage. When it becomes clear that the potion jars are intact, they follow the sound to Graham Wymer, who has seemed to have wet himself.
Snape gives one final sneer and strides out, slamming the classroom door behind him.
The classroom is silent for about 30 seconds (a record) before a timid voice asks "So, is this a free period then?"