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Chapter 1
"It was love at first sight" remembered James when he thought of the moment when he first laid eyes on his wife, Joanna Bastet, nearly eighty years ago in a ballroom in New York, his heart hers alone before she gave him hers in return. She had been a marvel that night, something almost untouchable as he watched her from across the room. Her blond hair had been shining in the chandeliers light bringing out her sapphire blue eyes and overtly pale skin. Her silver dress had glimmered too. She caught him looking at her after only a moment, her eyes scanning the length of him in his tuxedo without ever giving a clue as to what she thought in return. She only waved in a moment of coy teasing before her back was turned and yet she still had his heart all the same. She would keep it long after they were married then after he died too soon for her liking. James would spend his afterlife making up to her for leaving her sooner then he ever planned. Because once, as she lay naked in his arms, he had whispered to her that he would never leave her. He had loved her and walked with her on his arm. He had taken her for his wife and even dragged her from the city she loved, New York, to the sunshine of California, and then before either of them was ready, he had been forced to take his own life. He had been forced to break his promise and even though it was only for a few short months, he tried each day to make up for it just the same. James had promised never to leave her and despite what she said, he considered dying as breaking his promise. After she had sacrificed so much for him, come across the united stated for him, and then he had left her so easily. James didn't remember feeling pain as he slit his throat. He didn't remember anything really except thinking of her. It's true what they say, your life does flash through your eyes, and as James died, he thought of his life with her. That life flashed through his eyes, first that moment when he first saw her, then her kisses, their night laying in bed, and their wedding. It was all there as he left her for that short while. It left James with many regrets. He regretted never having her change him to be as she was. He regretted the mistake he'd made to draw the attention of the police to his doings. Most of all though, he just regretted dying, and leaving her. It wasn't what he'd wanted. That was why she was his last thought as the razor sliced through his throat. She was always the first thing on his mind when he awoke each morning and the last thing at the end of each night and that moment was no different.
James didn't know how much time elapsed before he appeared standing before his own body as it was enclosed in a body bag. He only remembered when she stumbled into the room refusing to let the policemen hold her back. He had stood there, his eyes on her yearning to hold her as she fell to her knees before his body, and he had watched as sobs were wrenched from her throat. She wouldn't let them take his body, she had sobbed over him until the police had forced her to her feet. James remembered wanting to throttle them as he watched them lay their hands on her, so they could take him from her. He had tried to touch her, tried to kneel before her, and make her hear him. Joanna couldn't hear or feel him though. Watching her cry and not being able to do anything had killed James all over again. Joanna couldn't see him right away. James didn't know if it was her grief that blocked her, but no matter what he did, he couldn't make her see him. He never left her side in the days following his death. He went where she went within the walls of the hotel as he quickly learned that he couldn't leave. He would speak to her, soothing words of love, but she didn't hear him. She merely sat in her sad state her face now always covered in her tears and James knew if she didn't have her immortality she would have withered away before his ghostly eyes. He could see the temptation growing in her eyes to end her immortal state. That was why he was glad when the fog finally lifted and suddenly, she saw him. If that hadn't happened, James knew she would have tried to join him in death, and that wasn't what he wanted. Since he died, he had taken to watching her sleep, and it was a time like this that she opened her eyes to see him. She stared right at him at first as if expecting him to disappear.
"Joanna?" James said it softly part of him unsure if she was really seeing him until her hand came to touch his cheek his hand coming to cover her own. He had missed her touch.
"You died, James, I saw them take you away" exclaimed Joanna his eyes closing in that moment to nuzzle her hand. He kissed her palm before his eyes opened again to look at her. The tears were gathering in her eyes then and suddenly, she was in his arms, breathing him in, and clinging to him.
"Shhhhhh, dearest. I'm right here with you. I'm won't ever leave you again. I mean it this time" breathed James letting his fingers run through her hair her body shaking with her sobs as her fists gripped his dress shirt before her eyes sought his as if to make sure she would really find him there with her.
"You should have let me change you. Everything would be alright if you'd let me change you" exclaimed Joanna her eyes accusing yet sad as they looked into his own. James didn't argue with her. He didn't even know what to say.
He knew she was right as he looked at her. From the moment they met, she had been honest with him as to her nature. While she had never called herself a vampire, she had revealed to him her immortal state as soon as she realized how she felt for him. Joanna had offered to change him many times, but for some reason James himself didn't understand, he always refused. He'd thought their time together would be longer. That he'd have the time to accept her offer someday when she asked again, but he never had. Now, as he looked at her, he felt foolish and sorry, and so many other things that had no real name. He had married the queen of the vampires, a woman who'd been living since before he was born, he'd fallen hopelessly in love with her really, only to not let her change him.
"Why didn't you let me change you?" whispered Joanna her voice pained as she looked up at him.
"I always thought there would be more time. I didn't know this would happen, I'm sorry, dearest. I should have walked by your side forever, Joanna. I made a mistake" whispered James his words spoken like the apology that it was as his hands cupped her face bringing her closer until their foreheads touched.
Joanna didn't answer or say anything. Her eyes peered up into his as her hands crisscrossed over his to touch the face, she never thought she'd touch again. She had been so sure she'd never see him again, never feel his arms around her again, and yet she had awoken to see him lying next to her like any other day. She just couldn't stop thinking about how she had nearly lost him, and a sob left her throat. As James drew her closer into the circle of his arms, Joanna slanted her mouth over his into a kiss. James closed his eyes as he drew her body taut against his as he kissed her deeply feeling the same emotions roiling through him as were going through her. When their lips opened, their eyes met as they opened once more, and as his hands caressed her back as he held her, Joanna still held his face in her hands.
"Don't you ever leave me again, James. I don't think I could bear it a second time" whispered Joanna her voice quivering as she let her hands drop from his face. Her arms were strong as they went around his waist and her head buried itself in his chest as she took a deep breath. So many months she had had to learn what it was like to live without him and she didn't want to experience that again.
"Never" James whispered kissing her head as his eyes closed. A thousand memories roamed behind his eyes then, all of her, his wife, and sighing, he let himself be drawn back into them.
Back to a time when he was a lad of new money stature in the land of dreams that was New York City and she was the goddess of every eyes, to the first time he saw her.