Thirty Truths on the Hao and Yoh Relationship
Written by Yue-eternal
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1)It had been for a long time since Hao had love Yoh. Even until now, he still won't admit it.
2) Hao had once told Yoh that his eyes reminded him of fire. But that was only until when Yoh said his eyes reminded him of the devil - Anna.
3) Hao did Shakespeare once. Yoh had confirmed it
4) However, he seemed to have taken a liking to sneak under Yoh's window every night, singing at the top of his lungs on how he loves Yoh. That only stopped when Anna decided to chuck out an over-sized cupboard in her sleep. Until now, she still thinks that it was a cat who sings.
5) Devastated, Hao tried to do gymnastic to get Yoh's attention every night. However, all he got was a loud yell from Ren as he had pissed in his sleep.
6) Hao had cried desperately about Yoh must have hated him for trying to hurt his friends. Yoh, on the other hand, finally figured out why he had cried easily. He must have mastered the art of peeling onions.
7) Their relationship finally started when Hao had bravely stood up for Yoh in front of Anna; only for a piece of steak since had greatly decided that there's no place like home.
8) Horo Horo had often caught Yoh moaning Hao's name seductively in his sleep. He also had found out that the bed is often wet because of this.
9) Anna still thinks that it was Milk and had asked a horrified Ren to drink it all up. Ren, however, ended up cursing Yoh at the end of every day, much to Yoh's dismay.
10) Unfortunately, Ren found out on Yoh's secret obsession and promptly took the chance to teach Yoh how to kiss. And that was also when Yoh finally mastered the 'Art of kissing: Ren's style.'
11) Yoh had came out of Hao's room one morning, all flushed up. The Chinese Shaman took the cue to ask Yoh how it had went. Yoh however said nothing and went on to his room where fan girlish squeals are heard later. That DID answer Ren's question.
12) For the first few weeks on their growing relationship, Hao finally learned 'sex' – the hard way. However, he's still unsure where all of Yoh's lessons came from. It was still a perfect bliss.
13) Manta had let slipped that Ren taught Yoh all that. Hao, jealous, had made sure that Ren stayed in his mansion for recovery for a whole four weeks. He soon came back to the house, with more serious injuries.
14) Ryu still couldn't figure out why Anna had simply chucked out the dining table out of the window.
15) Due to some circumstances, Hao fainted for the second time that day when he was told Yoh had actually learned how to cook.
When asked why, he simple stated, "God… It was unbelievable." No one can figure out what that was all about until Yoh finally let them in on a little secret – 'More Spice'
The others fainted at the spot.
16) It was foretold that Hao had many wives in the past before. Yoh had made sure none of them came back running back to Hao. He did that by shouting, "Anna The Bill persons are here"
Short of cash at the moment, she did the honors of kicking them out one by one. No flowers were sent even though the wives had suffered a big pain in the butt disease.
17) Within the first two months of them being together, Anna finally found out when she accidentally found out or rather, saw, how the milk was spilled on her bed. Her normal trashing only came after they were finished.
18) Their first heated kiss was recorded and sold to fan girls' world wide. Faust, accidentally, bought it and came two days later, asking them to donate their tongues, muttering something about needing to help the poor.
Actually, he needed it to comfort a PMS-ing Eliza in the process.
19) For the first time in his whole entire life, Hao finally realized what is the meaning of 'seme' and 'uke'.
20) Hao, being almighty and all, was still a jealous man. People soon learned not to go a mile near Yoh if they still value their life.
21) Ren and Horo Horo finally came up with the idea of getting Hao to propose to Yoh. It only came into play after Anna had thrown Hao out of the house and forced him to stay out in the rain for 5 days. But it was cut short to 3 days due to Yoh constant cries for Hao. Again, the art of peeling onions came into action.
22) Many rumored that Anna cried in her bedroom for three days straight. But few lived to tell the tale.
23) Rumors again had it that Hao proposed to Yoh in one of their many 'acts' in the night. Again, many had to agree that it's kinky.
24) Lyserg did the marrying the couple thing. Ren was regarded as the best man, the spirits – ring bearer and Manta, who was forced into a dress – the flower girl.
Anna was closed into anger and tears as Yoh walked up the aisle, beautiful and gracefully. Many thought that she cried because of losing Yoh.
In reality, she is just angry that Yoh looked much sexier than her. She never wanted to believe in that.
25) Hao was having hard time breathing. Drooling excessively at his soon-to-be-bride, he fainted.
Faust had clearly stated that he fainted due to excess dehydration.
26) He awoke several minutes later, suffering headaches and lack of water. Ren happily declared that Hao was not in the condition of getting married so he would have to take his place. Hao, getting back to his senses, demanded a sacrificial offering in the wedding.
It was his only way to get rid of the Chinese shaman without any reasons at all.
27) After the wedding, the newly-wedded couples went on their honeymoon which Yoh had came back complaining that Hao did nothing more than burning things and people up much to his dismay.
28) However, things get heated up before they knew it, Yoh got pregnant, much to everyone surprised. Until now, no one knew how it happened.
29) Faust merely shrugged and smiled slyly. He was placed in the mental hospital later.
30) The shamans who were present as well as the ten priests had officially declared the day 'Yaoi Day' which was later banned by Gorudoba.
However, it still remained remembered until today, since it was the day when Yoh finally 'opened up' and showed people a new face by shouting out death threats and colorful vocabularies which remained censored due to a particular reason.
And after that came the largest part in life when Jun came out walking towards Hao, saying that, "Congratulations, you have got a baby girl."
Hao, human aged 16, male, had fainted in shock, again.