Hi! I was really bored and then I got an idea. I'm doing a one-shot that takes place during Frostbite right after Rose kills Isaiah (don't think I spelled that right lol) and Elena. But Rose reacts differently when Dimitri and the rest of the guardian's come to the house. The characters are a bit OOC at review. Originally this was gonna be a short one shot but then I just kept writing and now it's really long lol.

Disclamer: I don't own Vampire Academy, all rights go to Richelle Mead.

I dropped on all fours and stroked Mason's hair. I had to protect him. It should be me dead, not him. I let tears fall freely down my face and held the dull sword tightly in one hand while my other hand stroked Mason's hair. I almost wished I could just curl up in a ball and die with him.

After what felt like hours but was probably only a few minutes the door burst open and a rush of people entered the room. I glanced up and I saw guardians. I was not going to let anyone touch Mason. I weakly raised the sword up and shouted at them to stay back. Even I was surprised how fierce my voice sounded. They all stopped. The room was quiet for a few seconds and then the noise started up again but no one moved forward.

Except Dimitri. He walked over to where I sat and kneeled next to me and said "Rose put the sword down."

"I have to protect Mason." I said quietly.

"You did protect him." He said.

I weakly dropped the sword and stared at the ground, wanting to just die. Then Alberta walked over and said "Get her out of here Belikov." Dimiti pulled me up and he wrapped his arms around me while I sobbed into his chest.

He brought me outside and I looked up only to see Christian and Mia came running up to us. Mia was the first to speak "Oh my god Rose, we were so worried, are you okay?" She asked frantically. I just leaned my head back onto Dimitri's chest and sobbed.

"Guardian Belikov, what's wrong with her?" Christian asked.

"We don't know." Dimitri said, and I'm sure even they could hear the desperation in his voice. Christian just nodded and asked him if he wanted him and Mia to get me on the plane so I could rest and he could go back in the house with the rest of the guardian's. He said that it wasn't a problem and that he was going to go with me and get on the plane. I wish they wouldn't talk about me like I wasn't here.

Then my mother ran over to Dimitri and I. Why can't everyone just leave us alone? "Hey Belikov, give Rose to me. I'll get her on the plane." Hell, why does everybody want to get me on the damn plane? I can go myself.

Dimitri couldn't exactly say no to my mother so he let go of me and I whimpered and said, "No."

"No what?" My mother asked.

"No, I don't want to go with you, I wanna go with Dimitri."

"Guardian Belikov." Seriously? She's correcting me at a time like this? I was still a total mess, with tears running down my face, my hair was a mess, I hadn't had anything to eat or drink in the past...I don't actually know how long ago it was that we ended up in that basement. It seemed like forever, but it was most likely only a few days.

"No, you call him Guardian Belikov. I call him Dimitri." I told her.

"We're not having this argument right now. Belikov get her on the plane." My mother said. Dimitri started leading me to the plane and I just staggered along at his side, trying not to think about what had happened in the house. But I couldn't help it. The Stigoi snapping Mason's neck. Mia smothering Isiah with water. Me cutting their heads off. Each memory cut me like a knife.

We got on one of the academies private jets and Dimitri sat down in the window seat and he motioned for me to sit in the seat next to him. So I walked over and sat on his lap. "Yeah, I think I like this better." I said. He wrapped his arms around me and I leaned my head on his shoulder and he just murmured to me in Russian. I didn't actually undertand it, but it was comforting.

,

After a while of just sitting like that with Dimitri others started to board the jet. Mia and Christian sat in front of us and Mia gave Dimitri and I a confused look but she didn't say anything. My mother and Alberta sat across from us and I knew they were watching me but I didn't look at them. I either stared at the window, or at Dimitri. After a while my tears slowed and eventually came to a stop.

Then Dimitri and I seemed to remember at the same time that I hadn't eaten or had anything to drink in days and he asked the flight attendant for some food and water for me. When the flight attendant came back with a donut and some water, I probably should have been happy but I wasn't. I just didn't have it in me to be happy right now. I ate the food though and it tasted delicious.

The pilot announced that we were going to have to stop at the royal court and get fuel. I had never been to the royal court and it kind of sucked that my first time going there had to be under these circumstances because I couldn't really enjoy it now. I couldn't really enjoy anything right now.

"What time is it?" I asked Dimitri quietly. My voice sounder weak and it was filled with pain. I don't know how I was going to get over this. Mason was dead. Because of me. This was all my fault.

"It's about eleven." Wow, it was late.

"Are we going to stay at the court overnight?"

"Yes." He answered. We were both trying to be quiet because Christian and Mia were asleep as was Eddie who was sitting with some random guardian towards the front of the jet. I sighed and asked "Are they going to make me sleep alone?"

"I don't know. Why?"

"Because if they do, I'll have nightmares."

"Then I'll stay with you."

"Are they going to let you?" I asked. I'm sure some people would object to me having Dimitri sleep in my room. They didn't know about us but it was still weird to have a guardian sleep in a novices room.

"I don't care. I'm staying with you." He whispered.

"Thank you."

I looked over and my mother was looking at Dimitri and I. She couldn't hear what we were saying but she looked a little suspicious. Well, I had been sitting on his lap for like six hours.

About an hour and a half before we were supposed to land at the court I started to get a really bad headache. I didn't say anything but Dimitri noticed anyway. Of course he did, he can read me like a book.

"Are you okay?" He asked me with a concerned look on his face.

I nodded and gave him a tiny, fake smile "Yeah, I'm fine."

He gave me a 'no messing around' look and asked again.

"I swear to god Dimitri, I'm fine." He just sighed and said "Rose, you need to learn when to take care of yourself."

"I'm fine!" I shouted. Everyone turned and looked at us. "What the hell are you staring at?" I shouted again.

"Rose, calm down." Dimitri whispered. I took a deep breath and nodded. After a few minutes passed my headache was worse and I could see black shapes in front of my eyes. I groaned and leaned against Dimitri's chest and closed my eyes.

"Please tell me what's wrong." He said.

"Nothing is wrong." I told him. I was lying, but I didn't really care.

"I know your lying Rose."

When I opened my eyes back up I didn't see black shapes anymore. I saw ghosts. Ghastly faces with their hands all reaching at me. I saw Lissa's family. And I saw...I saw Mason.

I screamed at the top of my lungs and collapsed on to the floor of the plane. I heard voices of people on the plane but I couldn't make out the words. I just kept screaming and then I blacked out.

I woke up a few minutes later and realized I was still on the private jet. But the ghosts were gone and my head didn't hurt anymore. I was laying across a row of seats and Mia, Christian, my mother, Alberta and Dimitri were standing around me and when they realized I was awake they all looked relieved. I wondered where Eddie was and then I remembered that he was probably still high off of stigoi endorphins.

Poor Eddie. Poor Mason. God, I am so stupid. I told Mason about Spokane. If I was more responsible this whole thing wouldn't have happened.

My mother was the first to speak up "Rose, what the hell happened?"

"It was noth-" I was cut off by Dimitri who said "Rose don't say it was nothing again because that clearly wasn't nothing."

I glared at him and said "Can everyone just back off. I'm fine. It was nothing."

"Rose that wasn't nothing." Dimitri said. I could tell he was getting frustrated but he was trying not to show it.

"Dimitri I'm fine."

"No your not. Why can't you just let us help you?"

"Because I don't need anyone's help! I can take care of myself! I don't want help, soon I'll be guarding Lissa and there's not going to be someone to turn to for help everytime something goes wrong."

"Well your not guarding Lissa right now and we're just trying to help."

"Dimitri your being ridiculous. I. Am. Fine." I said.

"Rose you are the most stubborn person I've ever met." He said.

"I don't want to argue right now."

"Neither do I." Dimitri said.

Everyone was just watching our argument and not saying anything. I stood up and then I asked what time it was. Dimitri told me that it was twelve o'clock and we were going to be arriving at court in about a half an hour.

I nodded and sat down facing out the window. Dimitri sat down next to me. One single tear fell down my face. I think I'd cried more today than any other day in my life. Dimitri put his arm over my shoulder and pulled me against him and I just cried harder and mumbled, "This was my fault. Mason wouldn't be dead if I had been more responsible."

"Rose, it wasn't your fault, don't think like that."

"Of course it was my fault. You trusted me when you told me about Spokane and I totally let you down."

"Rose, you didn't let me down."

"Yes, I did. Why are you all being so nice to me? I just don't get it."

"You didn't do anything wrong. And we're trying to help you. It's not easy to get over your first kills. And your boyfriend died. We know this isn't easy for you Rose."

"He wasn't my boyfriend. Did Lissa tell you what happened before he left?"

"No."

"The night before, right after we were arguing in the hallway Adrian invited us to a party. So we all went and I got really drunk. I invited Mason to come back to my room and he said no he didn't want to do anything while I was drunk and that we could talk when I was sober. So the next morning after you told me about Spokane I was pissed at you so I brought Mason to my room and I told him about Spokane. He said he wanted to go and kill Strigoi. I told him no, that we couldn't just rush into this without information and he told me that was I different, not in a bad way, but that I was just like you"

I continued with the story, though I was crying harder than before. "And that made me mad because I wanted Mason to make me forget you not have a conversation about you. So I told him I hadn't changed at all and then we started making out. But in my head I was making out with you and so I told Mason I couldn't do it anymore. And he asked why I didn't know what to say. Like what was I supposed to say 'when I'm making out with you I'm picturing my twenty four year old mentor'? He asked what I wanted and I said I didn't know

"Then he said that for a person who claims that you need as much information as possible before you do something, I have a lot to learn about myself. And he was totally right. And then in Spokane he told me he wanted to give us another try. And I said I did too. But that was a lie. I didn't want to be with him. I love him. But not in that way. I don't feel the way I do with him that I do when I'm with you."

"I was stupid to lead him on like that for so long. I knew he couldn't replace you. But I still tried. Oh, and Dimitri, what I said before about Tasha's offer. I meant that. You should take it, it's a really great oppurtunity. You could have a family and guard Tasha. It'll be great for you." That was true, I just wanted him to be happy. No matter how much it killed me to let him go, I wanted him to have a great life, and an awesome job and a family.

"Rose, as soon as I knew you were missing I told Tasha no. I can't be with her. I wanted her to make me forget you. I wanted to move on, but I can't."

We were whispering so no one heard this conversation, thank god.

"Really?" I asked him in a small voice.

"Yes really, I love you Rose. I always will."

"Even now? I'm a mess. I'm gonna be a mess for a while. I don't know how long it's gonna take me to get over this. I don't know if I can do this alone."

"Well you don't need to do it alone. You have me, you have Lissa, you have your mother and all your friends. We'll help you Rose."

I turned away from the window and looked at the row in front of us assuming the moroi were both asleep. Christian was. But...Mia wasn't...and she was watching us. And she could hear our conversation. I had just assumed they were both asleep. God, why do I mess everything up?

"Mia..."

"Don't worry. I...I won't tell anyone." She said and she smiled at me a little. But her eyes were sad. She'd also gone through a lot in the last few days.

"Um...thanks." I told her. "And...what you did..back at the house. That was really brave. You saved my life. Thank you." I told her sincerly.

"No problem. I was just doing the right thing. It's not like we were going to let you die Rose."

I just nodded. Then the pilot announced that we were now landing at the court. I was beyond exhausted at this point, and I had no doubt Adrian would contact me in my dreams tonight. We landed and I stood up and walked off the plane. When we got if it was absolutly freezing, and then I realized I had no jacket. I started shivering and Dimitri handed me his duster.

"Are you trying to turn me into a cowgirl?" I asked sarcasticsally.

"No, I'm trying to keep you from getting hypothermia." I put his jacket on and stood next to Dimitri. He pulled me closer to him. He'd been doing that a lot today...I'm surprised no one had thought anything of that.

Alberta came over and told both of us where our rooms were and I asked "Um, can Dimitri stay in my room?"

"I guess that's fine." She said and then she looked at Dimitri and I for a few more moments and then she moved on to give other people their room numbers.

Dimitri and I went to our room and I looked around. The room was amazing. There was a hot tub, a huge flat screen tv, a really nice laptop, a massive bath tub with spa jets, a huge king-sized bed, an incredibly soft white couch, and even the carpet was plush. I wish I could enjoy the room, but I was kind of out of it.

I was walking through the huge room and then I realized the huge mirror. I looked at myself. I was a total mess. My hair looked like something died on top of my head, I was paler than usual, I was skinny from not eating anything for like three days, and my eyes looked dead and lifeless. My face was red and puffy from all the crying and overall I looked really horrible.

I sighed and told Dimitri I was going to take a bath. After I was done in the bath I realized I didn't actually have any pajama's. I wrapped myself in a towel and asked Dimitri if he had anything I could wear. He told me that Lissa had packed a bag of stuff for me because she figured I'd want to change clothes when they found us. That's so Lissa. Dimitri handed me the bag and I went back into the bathroom and looked at what she'd packed me. Three pairs of skinny jeans, two skirts, four tops, and a black lacy tank top and some fuzzy pajama pants. I put on the tank top and pants and then went and sat next to Dimitri.

He had the tv on and then I realized what he was watching. It was the news. Not the human news, the news channel they broadcasted across court and at Moroi/Dhampir schools like . And the footage on the screen was of me. Holding my sword up and kneeling over Mason. There were cameras there when the Guardian's had raided the house?

The reporter was talking about how I'd used a sword that hadn't been sharpened in years to kill the Strigoi. Then the footage changed to a blonde Moroi woman standing in a hallway of one of the buildings. They were still talking about me and then I heard a knock on the door. I got up and opened the door and there was a camera crew and the blonde girl with a microphone. I glanced back at the tv and saw myself standing there in my pajamas. Great.

Dimitri had obviously realized who was at the door and he walked over and stood next to me.

I asked "What do you want?"

"Can you answer some questions for us?" The reporter asked me.

I sighed "Yeah, fine." I stepped aside and let the camera crew and the reporter in to my room. I went and sat on the couch and Dimitri sat down next to me.

"How do you feel about your first Stigoi kills?" The reporter asked. I wonder how many people actually watch this news. Hopefully not many.

"It sucks. Certainly not as fun as I thought it would be."

The reporter nodded, acting like she understood. But she didn't understand. She was a Moroi. She'd probably never even seen a Strigoi.

"And your only seventeen, correct?"

"Yes, I'm seventeen."

"In the footage we have, you raise your sword at the Guardian's. Why is that?" She asked.

I sighed and then answered "I was protecting Mason. I wasn't gonna let them get near him."

"And what made you put down your sword?"

I pointed to Dimitri "Well, my mentor, Guardian Belikov came over and told me to drop the sword and I said I had to protect Mason and he said I already did and I just like broke down."

"And how are you...coping with Mason Ashford's death?"

"Um, he was like my best friend and this has been really hard on me. I've been kind of a mess." I said. And through the bond I felt Lissa's worry for me grow stronger and I realized that she was watching the news. Shit.

"Well, we're gonna go to commercial now and then we'll be back with our special guests Rose Hathaway and Guardian Dimitri Belikov."

Then the camera's turned off and I turned to face Dimitri "So...Lissa's watching the news. I should probably call her." Dimitri nodded and handed me his cell phone. I dialed Lissa's number and she picked up on the first ring "Hello?"

"Lissa...it's...it's me."

"Oh my god Rose! I'm so glad your okay! You know your on the news right?"

"How would I not know Lissa, I'm doing a live interview with Dimitri. And we can only talk for like three minutes cause after the commercials my interviews gonna start again."

"Okay. And yeah, why is Guardian Belikov in your room?"

"You know you can call him Dimitri. And he's in my room cause I can't sleep alone tonight. I'll have nightmares."

"Oh." She said.

"Yeah."

"Rose, are you really okay?" She asked, sounding very concerned.

"No. Not at all. But I can deal with it. It's not your problem to deal with Lissa."

"But Rose I just want to help."

I laughed one dry, humorless laugh "That's exactly what Dimitri said. Anyway I gotta go. I'll call you when I'm done with this stupid interview."

''Okay. Bye Rose."

"Bye Liss."

I asked the reporter, I learned that her name was Alicia, how long we had until commercial was over and she said two more minutes. I sat down on the couch and then I fixed my position so I was laying with my head on Dimitri's knee. I was so beyond exhausted right now I thought I might just fall asleep like that. Dimitri began stroking my hair and I wished the camera crew would just leave.

And then they turned the camera's on without telling me. I jumped up into a sitting position and then I got a nauscious feeling in my stomach. The same feeling I'd gotten around Elena and Isaiah.

Strigoi.

Hey! Ok, so this isn't going to be a one-shot. Cause I still have a lot more to write for this story and if I made all of it into a one-shot it would be waaaay to long. I just decided that now haha.

PEACE AND LOVE

EVA