"But why do I have to marry Aragorn!" Elrohir whined as Elladan finished tying the last bow on the wedding gown.
"Because, we both know you're the more feminine of the two of us..." Elladan said with a smirk.
"What? That makes no sense, we are literally identical!" Elrohir hissed, twisting to glare at Elladan.
"Ah yes, I forgot... Well you're already dressed so it hardly matters now!" Elladan said cheerily.
"Neither of you are getting married!" Arwen snapped from where the twins had tied her to a chair in her chambers.
"Hush dear sister, we are sailing soon, this will be the last prank we will ever be able to pull on Estel! It has to be grand!" Elladan said as he clipped the veil on to Elrohir's hair, draping the fabric over his face.
Arwen sighed in exasperation.
"My lady? It is time." Faramir's voice sounded from outside the door.
Elladan hastily slapped his hand over Arwen's mouth. "She will be out in a moment!" Elladan answered, listening to Faramir's disappearing footsteps before uncovering Arwen's mouth. "Come Elrohir, your time has come." He said, linking arms with Elrohir as he tugged him out of the room.
Glorfindel made a strange squawking noise as "Arwen" stepped on to stage. He stood to make his way to the front, but was stopped as Elrond grabbed his shoulder. He turned to look at his lord, who just shook his head slowly, his expression unreadable. Glorfindel slowly sat back down.
Elrohir didn't listen to much of the ceremony, only answering when prompted to. He stared worriedly around as the priest neared the end, shouldn't Elladan have gotten him out by now?
"You may now kiss the bride." The priest said happily.
Aragorn leaned in, closing his eyes and lifting the veil and planting a soft kiss on his bride, who made a very worrying squawking noise as he did so. He pulled back as to find out why Arwen made such a noise and ended up making his own. He turned frantically to the priest. "Are we already officially married?" He said in alarm.
The priest nodded, looking slightly confused.
Elrohir faked a grin. "Haha, you are now married to me, Elladan!" He said, his voice making a strange cracking noise as he quickly fled the scene, leaving a very concerned Aragorn alone.
"Did I just wed my brother...?" Aragorn asked as he turned to Elrond, his expression pleading.
Elrond shrugged. "As opposed to your sister?" He mused. Glorfindel nodding in solemn agreement.
Aragorn's eyes narrowed. "We are not related! We have been over this!" He huffed, storming away.
Glorfindel's brown furrowed. "But aren't they distantly related...?"
Elrond sighed, nodding solemnly as he rubbed his temple, attempting to rid the coming headache. "Why me... why are these my children..."
True events that actually happened. No joke. Divorces are rough in middle earth...
-Ro