AN: No, not mine.
The First of April
Last year, April Fools Day had been the day after a full moon. This was especially upsetting to the boys because they knew they would be too tired to pull of the myriad of pranks they usually reserve for their most holy day of the year. However, they pulled out a calendar of their last two years at school and found that this would not happen the next two times, and that year they went quiet. They floated through the first of their fifth year sleepily, not noticing the looks they were getting from their peers. Their eyes were hardly open during their Transfiguration exam, but McGonagall was looking in their direction curiously the entire time. The whole school was on the edge of their seats at dinner, waiting for something to happen and nothing came from them. The four just ate their meal, laughed at Joe McQueen when the cherry bomb his mate put in his pie went off, and made an early exit to the common room to silence their four posters and catch up on their sleep.
They never did find out what they missed in the common room the night of April Fools their fifth year. The entire Gryffindor house, with the four exceptions, gathered together to discuss the best prank and the best prankster of the year.
"They didn't even pull one prank!" someone yelled. The Marauders had always been a shoe-in for the title, but their conspicuous lack of tricks pulled them out of the running.
After all the pranks were shared, a loud voice cut through the mob of students to give one last recounting of a prank. "There is no doubt in my mind who is going to win this year. Listen to what happened to me..." Silence filled the room as Mary Harper told the students of the prank pulled on her, and as she predicted, the sick individual who pulled the prank on her was named the years best prankster, or to be correct, prankstress.
Eleven months and two weeks after this happened, Lily Evans approached her fellow prefect Remus Lupin after their biweekly meeting. "I need to talk to you some time tonight. Alone."
Remus eyed her suspiciously. This sounded odd coming from Lily; she wasn't one of his closest friends and her dealings were usually out in the open, or at least not secretive. He began to get nervous that his platonic feelings were being more than reciprocated when she appended her statement. "And bring Sirius."
No one saw Sirius Black leave the common room that night because he was under James' invisibility cloak. No one questioned Lily and Remus leaving together because they had rounds. After stepping out of the portrait hole, Sirius, having stowed the cloak, popped out of the shadows, causing Lily to jump a foot in the air. "Evans! To what do I owe the pleasure of being summoned by you? Handing out detentions pre-crime now?"
"No, you idiot, I need your help" she retorted.
Sirius and Remus looked at her like she had two heads. "What could you possibly need our help for?" Sirius spat.
"My prank!" Her eyes danced as she said this, not losing their luster when both boys stared at her speechless. "My April Fools Day prank."
While Sirius was still lost for words, Remus bounced back, "You don't pull pranks."
"Articulate, you are. And yes, I do." She looked at them expectantly, waiting for them to realize something. "You never did find out who won last year, did you?"
Remus shook his head and Sirius whispered "We didn't."
Lily smiled, raised her hand and waved at them. Their jaws dropped simultaneously and while neither could manage a reply, Lily assumed what they were thinking. "I did. It was a good one, too."
"What... Who... How?" Sirius had gained limited control of his voice.
"Mary. Remember the Transfiguration test? I kept her busy all week so she wouldn't study and then the night before I had a big panic attack so we could study together. At about midnight, I started crying and told her that there was no way we would pass the test so we would have to cheat--" She was cut off by Remus.
"You don't cheat."
"There you go, being articulate again. Could you maybe voice your opinion in a less verbose way?"
"You. Not studying. Convincing someone else, to cheat? Not possible."
"Hard to believe right? But I told her that only magical ways of cheating are detected and if we used plain muggle crib sheets, no one would find out. So we wrote down our notes again and again, smaller and smaller until they were small enough to pull out during the test without being seen. We were up until four in the morning. And when she went to the bathroom I put a charm on hers so that the words would change when the test started. I believe the words I used were "Good luck, sucker. April Fools!" She punched me so hard after that test I had a bruise for weeks." Lily was gazing off in remembrance at this point.
It made sense that Remus was worried about her score. "So did she fail the test?"
"We both got 100. Rewriting notes over and over is a form of studying. I could probably still ace that test."
"Couldn't you have gotten her into real trouble if she was caught with the crib sheet?" Remus made a valid point.
"I cleared it with McGona--"
"Only you! Only you would make sure your prank was okay with the teacher!" Sirius had found his voice.
Lily stared at him like he had two heads. "Yes, I did. I didn't want her to get in trouble at my expense for a prank. Is there something wrong with that?" When he failed to answer her, she continued. "Furthermore, that's one of the reasons my pranks are so effective: I make sure there is no chance of failure at any step and I go all in. I didn't study for that test either, so I could have failed as well. Some of us like to think things through before we go throwing dung bombs off the balconies onto the first years!"
She breathed for a moment to let herself calm down. "Either way, yes I clear my pranks with the teachers, but I also get voted best prankster, so you can't really complain, now can you? And I need your help, so will you help me?"
The boys stared at her for a moment, lost for words. Could this girl, this proud girl, straight as an arrow, be asking them to help her prank someone else? They would think it was a prank right then if her face hadn't been so serious.
Remus broke the silence. "What's the prank?" It was a valid question.
Lily sighed. "I'm going to seduce Potter." She had a wide grin on her face as both jaws dropped and she cut them off before they could respond. "And then I'm going to tell him I'm a man."
"What?" "I don't get it." Remus and Sirius managed to respond at the same time.
"I'm going to make him think I like him and then tell him that I'm not technically a woman. Or that I used to be. I'm not sure of the specifics yet, he has seen me in a bathing suit." She lost herself in her thoughts for a moment before continuing. "I need you two to put girly images in his head."
"What do you mean?"
"Just drop phrases. Call me a pussy. Say the words "bear your children." Subtly influence him to make him think I'm real prissy and girly and whatnot, and then I'll be going around doing masculine things and it will confuse him subconsciously. Then, if I do anything brave, call attention to it. Call me ballsy or mannish. And then when I finally tell him, it will all make sense." She looked sure. Resolute. Like she knew exactly what she was doing.
"When is all this happening?"
"I'm not going to tell you all the details, Bond, but probably around the 31st." The boys were in too much shock to pay attention to her patronizing them. "So will you help me?"
When neither answered, her face dropped. "Will you at least not tell him then?"
"We'll help." Sirius spoke up. "I'm interested in this. It could turn out nicely. I want to see you work."
"Yeah." Remus nodded in agreement. "I think we could do this. Is there anything in it for us?"
"You mean other than reveling in your friends embarrassment?"
"Yeah."
"No. Maybe the pride of a job well done, but not so much with you two. So you'll help?"
"We're in."
"Thanks boys, this means a lot. I'll see you later?" She started to walk off alone.
Remus was confused. "Don't we have patrol?"
Lily looked pensive for a moment before she answered. "I can't really make you patrol with me for the next few weeks, can I?"
Remus and Sirius grinned. "I guess you're right."
"You two know how to play it cool. I don't want him knowing anything about this."
"Don't worry baby, we're the masters of cool." Sirius was quick to respond.
Lily looked at them quizzically before smiling. "Goodnight boys. And thanks again." With that she turned and left them standing there.
They watched her go until she turned the corner and then stared at the space she just left for a moment until Remus broke the silence. "Did she just get more attractive or is it just me?"
"If that bastard hadn't called dibs..."
Lily's plan still rang in Remus' and Sirius' brains as they waited for their friends in the common room the next morning. It was a Hogsmeade weekend and they were waiting for James, who took a notoriously long time getting ready in the morning. He came down the boys' staircase just moments before Lily and her friends came down the girls' staircase. James went over to his friends to receive his usual beating.
"Ten minutes on your hair!" It was common knowledge that Sirius couldn't understand James' fixation with it. "I hope you've noticed you take as long as the females."
James would have answered back but at that moment he was listening to what Lily was arguing about with her friends. "Do you understand how crazy you sound? Why do you care what I'm wearing?"
"Because we're all wearing skirts! You're the odd girl out! Now we don't match and you look like our, our..." Mary was whining.
"It's still cold. I don't want to wear a skirt just because I can or just because you all are. I want to wear my jeans. I'm not changing just so we can look like a cult!"
At hearing this, Sirius decided to join the conversation from across the room. "Oi Evans! What are you, scared your balls will hang out? Put on a skirt!"
Lily turned bright red. Remus thought of how good an actress she was as she sent a death glare over to Sirius and stormed out of the common room. He then turned to James. "You two would make a good couple: you're a girl and she's a guy."
James was going to reply angrily, but found himself without words, so he shut his mouth and followed his friends down to the Great Hall. He was too flustered to notice Remus and Sirius winking at each other.
In order to confuse James even further, later that day while Lily was with her friends in Zonko's, Sirius sneaked up behind her and set of a small firework. Lily screamed and jumped a foot in the air. "What the hell did you do that for?"
"Come on! It's just a popper, you big puss, what are you so scared of?" He spoke loud enough for James to hear.
Lily glared at him for a moment before her expression softened. "Thanks. For this morning in the common room, too. You're doing a great job."
"Were the skirts orchestrated? Do your friends know too?"
"Yeah, but you're more important." When he looked at her puzzled she continued. "You can talk to him when I'm not around. I do all this acting, but you have to help him make sense of it, and by sense I mean my skewed reality where I have testicles."
"What a shame that would be."
Lily smiled. "Shove off. Get back to your friends." She watched as Sirius walked away from her and then exited the store hoping that James hadn't seen or heard the rest of their conversation.
She kept relatively quiet until a few evenings later when she, after finishing rounds with the Ravenclaw prefects, ran into James in the empty common room doing his homework. To his surprise, she sat down in the chair facing him and looked at him. Their interactions had been civil for the past few months. They were not yet friends, but they were past being acquaintances and they were stuck in a limbo of sorts.
"Why are you looking at me?" James' voice interrupted her thoughts.
She sighed lightly, "There's nothing else here to look at."
They sat in silence for a few moments more before she smiled, rose and walked away from him. At the top of the stairs, she turned back and said just loud enough for him to hear "Good night."
"Good night, Lily," he whispered. He sat with his abandoned homework for a quarter hour before he decided to ask his friends for a judgment call. He quickly changed his mind when he got to the stairs and his opinion vacillated twice more before he sat on his four poster, keeping his mouth shut. If it still bothered him, he could always tell his friends tomorrow.
The matter was driven from his mind the next morning however, when Lily showed up to breakfast with her hair done in the way he liked most and he couldn't tear his eyes off her.
She sat across the table and a few seats past Peter so he could stare inconspicuously and unabashedly. Lily was debating a new Ministry policy with Mary and James watched her face as she pointed out the flaws in her friend's argument. It was obvious that she cared about the issue, but she like the debate more. She and Mary were calling each other daft and having fun doing it until their friend Sue reached onto Lily's plate to steal some potatoes.
Lily was outraged. "Get your own!"
Sue smiled and continued ravaging her friend's plate, mistaking her friend's attitude for mock anger. "There's no more over here. Share, won't you?"
"I wanted those!" Lily's demeanor shifted from anger to distress, and her friends noticed.
Sue asked, "What's wrong with you? They're only potatoes."
"She always gets this way when she's pms-ing, Sue, don't take it person- OW!" Mary was cut off when Lily punched her in the arm. "Didn't your mother ever tell you not to hit girls!"
"Don't say I'm pms-ing, you cow. Last time you had your period you turned my hair blue! And mothers say that to their sons."
"Well, you could be a mother's son, you punch like a man! I'm going to have a bruise now." Mary took to studying her arm and Sue looked to Lily.
"So which is it raging through your veins: estrogen or testosterone?"
Lily sighed and stabbed her precious potatoes with almost enough force to break the plate. James noticed and winced for the poor dish. Must be testosterone, he thought, should ask her to try out for replacement beater. Soon after Lily left the table he followed her to class only to sit behind her and stare for the rest of the day and for the next few days for that matter.
Both Remus and Sirius overheard this conversation between Lily and her friends and made mental notes to talk about it later. They strayed a few steps behind James and Peter while walking to Potions to talk in private.
"She's really laying the man thing on thick." Sirius observed, "But isn't she supposed to be seducing him or something?"
"Maybe she's being subtle. I'd think that would be more effective than having her bat her eyelashes all the time. Wouldn't he see through that?" Remus made a fair point.
Neither of them had noticed that they had made it to class far behind their friends, but when they walked into the classroom they noticed Peter was at a table alone. "Where's Prongs?" Sirius asked.
"Over there." They followed his head to a table in the front where James had paired himself with Lily. "She didn't even put up a fight." Peter said.
Remus looked at Sirius. "Strange." He looked over at Lily to see her looking down and blushing slightly, very much like a girl who is unsure of her footing. "She's good," he whispered to his friend before getting to work.
Lily didn't bat her eyelashes once all period, but she did manage to bump his hand reaching for an ingredient twice. And more importantly, her bag managed to slip off her chair just as class was ending, spilling its contents on the floor as the room emptied. Any idiot in the school knew James would chew off his arm to get a moment alone with Lily, and of course he took the bait.
"You didn't' have to stay behind to help me. Go with your friends." Lily said as she collected her belongings.
"Those guys are idiots. I'd rather be your friend." Upon hearing his reply, Lily stopped and looked at him. "What?" James asked.
"You're wandering into dangerous territory," Lily said getting up with her now filled bag. "I might start liking you, and who knows what hell would break loose if that happened."
When James just looked at her as she walked towards the door.
"Thanks for helping me. See you later." She turned and left, leaving him standing in the room alone, thinking about what she just said.
James went to dash to the common room to tell his friends and was surprised to find them outside the dungeon waiting for him.
"Lily was running pretty fast," Remus noticed.
Sirius mocked, "Did you flash her or something?"
"Attempt seducing her with your b.o.?" Peter added. It was clear they were prepared.
"I was just helping her with her books!" James cried indignantly. "She really ran?" he added to Remus, eyes wide.
"Oh yeah."
James was too giddy to notice the look on Remus' face that just screamed "I'm manipulating you!"
Things went on like this for a few days. Lily managed to act girly and mannish at the same time while shamelessly flirting at every possible second.
Remus and Sirius were just beginning to think this was old hat until Lily approached them in Charms class. James was working with Peter on the other side of the room so Lily didn't have to keep her voice too low. "When is the next full moon?"
"The twenty-ninth," Remus answered calmly, but Sirius' head whipped in his direction with wide eyes.
"What do you think you're doing?" he screamed in a fast whisper. "We're in class."
"Relax, she knows."
"Really," Lily added, almost upset, "I'm smarter than the three of you put together, why would you think I didn't know?"
Sirius was still shocked, but managed to choke out "Since when?"
"Since about two years before you, as a matter of fact." When she saw the look of defeat of Sirius' face she continued. "Don't get too upset. He was sloppy."
"Hey!" Remus cried.
"You were! He asked to borrow my Astronomy notes every month. Second year moon charts tipped me off. You're just lucky it was me and not some poor frightened soul who can't keep a secret." She sighed to remember why she came over in the first place. "The twenty-ninth, you say?"
"Yeah, two nights from tonight."
"This actually works out perfectly. I'll tell him on the thirtieth when he's tired, I'll wait for an answer on the thirty-first and on the first I'll do the reveal. Excellent." She sounded almost sinister.
"Why don't you tell him on the first?" inquired Sirius, "Isn't that the point of April Fools?"
"Everyone's expecting it on the first. How would you react if I told you I was a man on the first? You'd say 'She's pranking me," and nothing would happen. I don't like dealing with the skeptics and you know I'm right."
She took a few steps away before turning around and coming back to them. "Can I give you guys a set up?"
"A what?" Remus asked.
"Can I set up a situation for you to make one of your comments on?"
"Sure, what is it?"
"Mary's going to give me a jelly bean in Herbology and I'm going to spit it out."
Sirius knew where this was going. "Girls don't spit?"
"Something like that. I'll talk to you guys later. Thanks." She went back to her now abandoned partner to practice her charms.
Just as Remus and Sirius were getting back to practicing themselves, James sidled up to them. "What was she over here?" He looked curious and almost fearful.
"We were talking about you, you big stud." Sirius mocked with a wink. "She'd love nothing more than to get into your--"
Remus cut him off and effectively saved his neck. "She asked me about the prefect meeting tonight. She couldn't remember the room it's in."
This calmed James down enough to refrain from strangling Sirius, who knew enough to keep his mouth shut on this for the rest of the day, or at least until Herbology.
And sure enough in Herbology, Mary offered Lily some candy. Lily made a face before she spit the chewed jelly bean on the ground.
Sirius noticed his cue. He turned to James and said loudly, "Ahh, Evans. Spits like a man."
They both laughed and Lily looked up. "Fuck off, you two."
"Swears like a man, too." This caught Lily off guard because it came, not from Sirius, but from James.
Her eyes got wide but she slowly turned back to her table and wiped her forehead to hide the excitement in her eyes.
Both James and Sirius confused this with distress but kept quiet. "At least he didn't make a swallows joke," Mary added, trying to console Lily, but spoke too loudly. The boys heard and burst out into hysterics and Lily's head collided with her desk.
Satisfied with her work, Lily went quiet for the next day and only received a comment from Sirius during the afternoon of the twenty-ninth when he offered her a piece of candy from his pillowcase.
Her screams were heard all through the tower when she opened a chocolate frog package to find a chocolate coated rat instead.
"Good God, Evans!"
"It's just a rat," a peaky Remus added. James laughed at her quickly but soon after the boys disappeared to tend to their friend for the night.
The next morning, the boys were absent from their morning classes. While Lily's friends worried about the prank and where the boys could be, Lily put on a worried face and waited for them to show up at lunch, bleary eyed and sleepy.
Only Sirius and Peter showed up for Transfiguration after lunch; Remus was in the Hospital Wing. "Where's James?"
"Fell asleep after lunch." Peter announced with a yawn.
Sirius rubbed his eyes. "You can give him the homework later."
"Thanks," Lily said with a smile.
"You can give it to me too. Lord knows I won't be remembering it."
Lily sat in the common room with the rest of the tower after dinner. She finished her homework earlier than the rest of her classmates so she laid down on the couch with a book and waited for her fellow students to trickle up to their dormitories. She let herself doze for a moment and soon after, she woke up in the dim light, alone with Peter, Sirius and James.
Seeing that she had opened her eyes, Sirius sent a quick glance over to her and winked before saying "Wormtail, I dropped my watch behind my bed earlier. Would you help me get it?"
"Sure," Peter replied. "You coming, Prongs?" He added to James.
"Nah, I have to finish this essay. I'll be up in a little while." He blinked his eyes a few times and looked back down at the books on the table in front of him.
Lily waited for a quarter hour with her eyes closed before pretending to wake up. She sat up slowly and looked over to the table James was sitting at. His back was too her as she walked over and sat down in the seat next to him. She stared at his essay for a moment before breaking the silence between them.
"James?"
"Yes?"
"You do know your last name is spelt with two 'T's, right?"
He sighed. "I didn't think I was tired enough to misspell my own name." He fixed the mistake, "Thanks."
Lily sat for a moment before furrowing her brow and rubbing the bridge of her nose.
"Is something wrong?" James asked.
This time, Lily sighed. "Have you ever told a lie?"
James, not expecting a question like this, was taken aback. "I assume you don't mean 'your shoelace is untied.'"
She smiled and looked at the table, "No."
Sensing he was wading into restless waters, James chose his words carefully. "Can I ask what you lied about?"
Lily looked at him for the first time. "I let people believe something I knew to be untrue because I didn't want the truth to get out. It would've--" She let her words hang in the air for a moment before continuing. "There'd be rumors and I don't know if I could handle it."
"Would anyone get hurt if you told the truth?" he asked.
"Some people might. People close to me. My friends, you even."
James was puzzled but tried reassuring her. "I don't think anything you could say would make my undying passion for you extinguish," he said with a laugh and a smirk, but Lily looked back into his eyes.
Her eyes were round and full of a mixture of happiness and trepidation. Her eyes told James to continue.
This time seriously, he spoke again, "I don't think anything could change my feelings for you, no matter what your secret is. I hope that means something."
Lily, her eyes now full of tears, looked down to her lap and whispered, "It does."
She didn't have time to look up before he pulled her into a hug. She breathed him in and wiped her eyes on his shoulder before he pulled back and kissed her cheek. This caught Lily off guard and she looked James in the eye.
When he started to lean in to kiss he lips, she exhaled sharply and pulled out of his arms. "I can't- I can't let you do this until you know."
"Know what?"
"I'm not the girl you think I am. I'm not-- for a time I wasn't."
"Wasn't what?"
"For a time I wasn't a girl."
For one moment James thought she was kidding, but then he looked at her face. She was torn up, her face blotchy and red, her hands shaking. She couldn't be joking and reacting like this. "What- what do you mean?"
Lily was suddenly finding her hands and lap very interesting. "I was born and my parents had a choice, but I'm not a- a real--"
"Oh." James turned away forward in his seat. "Wow."
She looked at his eyes which were focused on his essay once more. "I couldn't let myself get involved with you without you knowing. It wouldn't be fair."
James didn't respond. He kept looking at his essay, as though it would tell him what to say, but his mind was blank.
"I never told anyone because it would have gotten twisted around. I'd never live it down."
They sat in silence for what seemed like hours before Lily got up and went to her dormitory. She got to the stairs and looked back, but James was still sitting there, unmoving. She remembered her plan and smiled at the back of his head before climbing the stairs.
James sat staring blankly at his essay for another half hour before remembering how tired he was. His mind was still reeling from Lily's confession. He'd thought about what would happen if he finally got her to like him and, though he would never admit it, began thinking of a future with Lily. He didn't know if he could deal with this. Lost in his thoughts, he found himself in his room, his feet having taken him there begging for sleep.
Remus, now returned from the Hospital Wing, saw him enter the room with a strange look on his face. "Is everything okay, Prongs?"
After a moment, he responded. "What? Yeah. I'm good." He was lost in his thoughts while he got ready for bed and closed the curtains on his four poster.
He didn't even hear Sirius ask "You ever finish that essay?"
The next morning both he and Lily were in their own worlds inside their heads. Only once, at breakfast did they make eye contact. So many words were exchanged across the table with that one look, but neither could speak. For the rest of the day, James was withdrawn from his friends and Lily was silent in classes. Both spoke only when spoken to, and James returned to the common room after dinner and went straight up to his dormitory. This gave Sirius and Remus a chance to talk to Lily.
"You really did a number on him. What did you say? Remus asked.
Lily's somber face burst into a huge smile. "I've been waiting to smile all day." She sighed happily.
"He's a walking zombie. What did you say?" Sirius asked with awe.
She just looked at them and kept smiling. "I'll see you boys in the morning. I wouldn't miss breakfast if I were you." With that, she ran off and practically bounced up the stairs to prepare.
Remus and Sirius exchanged excited and worried looks but found themselves sitting at breakfast on the morning of April Fools Day glancing at the door every few seconds. They tried to cover their anticipation with talk of the pranks they were going to pull over the course of the day, but found themselves too anxious.
James was just starting to wrap his brain around the situation with Lily and was even talking to his friends today when Lily walked into the Great Hall holding a gift bag.
She walked right up to where James was sitting and sat down next to him with a large smile on her face. She began talking like nothing had happened. "I know what I said the other night was heavy, but I never expected you to take it this well. No matter what your decision is, I want to thank you for being so cool and keeping your mouth shut, so I got you this present." She put the bag she was holding right down on the table in front of him. There was a note fastened to the outside that said "James" in pink cursive which he found ironic.
James stared at it for a moment and began to reach for it. "You really didn't have to," but she touched his hand to stop him.
"I really did." James noticed the strange look in her eyes, but let her continue. "So thank you." She withdrew her hand and walked straight out of the hall.
James didn't look back down to the gift after she had cleared the doors, but Remus and Sirius were staring at it intensely.
They managed to speak at the same time again. "What is it?" "Open it!"
James didn't know why he was nervous, but slowly reached for the bag and pulled out its contents. His face turned bright red when he found himself holding a bright pink phallus. He dropped it to his plate and his oatmeal splattered onto Peter's face. "Oi!"
Remus and Sirius were in hysterics. When Sirius managed to calm down enough to talk, he sputtered "She gave you a dildo!" and resumed laughing.
All Remus could choke out was "Read the card. What's in the card?"
James tore his eyes away from what was laying in his breakfast to detach the card from the bag. He unfolded it and read the pink writing on the inside.
"Dear James, All the man I've EVER been. April Fools! Love, Lily"
He managed to choke out a few dry laughs incredulously before rising from his seat. Sirius read the card aloud over his shoulder and his and Remus' laughs began all over again. At this point, people from other tables were turning to find what they were laughing about. James just rose, note still clenched in his hand, to go and find Lily, leaving his friends to asphyxiate on their joy behind him. He looked back to see Sirius gesticulating wildly holding the dildo before the door closed.
She was sitting in the common room in the middle of the couch, waiting for him. When he came through the portrait hole her face broke into a big smile but she didn't say anything as he stopped five feet in front of her, waving the note. "The note-- you're not--"
She cut him off. "Have you ever lied, James?"
James' eyes got round and the piece of parchment fell from his hands to the floor.
Lily continued. "I have, a few times now. But it's always in good fun."
"You, you--" James couldn't form a sentence with all this new information flying around.
"I'm not, nor have I ever been of the male gender. You have nothing to worry about."
Finally finding his voice, James managed to say, "You. Pranked me. You're not a man?"
"No."
"You're a girl?"
"Yes." Lily bit her lip and got up from her seat. "But you're such a good sport."
She walked straight up to James and kissed him full on the lips for one second. He was still to shocked from everything, kiss included, to respond at all when she said "And remember to come to the pow-wow later. I want to win best prank."
Lily let go of his face and walked towards the portrait hole when James' voice stopped her.
"Did you get more perfect overnight?" He hadn't meant to say it, only think it, but his words stopped her.
"No, I didn't." She walked back over to him and grabbed his hand, lacing her fingers with his.
She began pulling him towards the door and she said, "And if you come with me, I'll tell you how I won best prank last year too."