OK this fic is just one of those random ideas that popped into my head. There is no real point to this, thought I guess there is a feeling. Let me explain before you call in the white coats. This fic is about how one who dose not feel deals with grief. OK now I sound even nuttier huh? Well this is about Trowa, who any decent Gundam Wing fan knows shows less emotion then Heero, scary. And like Heero gained more humanity as the show went on. Anyway this is just a songfic about what might happen if overwhelming feeling from the past resurface. Even the mighty can fall. If you have this song I would sagest listening to it while you read.
Legal stuff. Gundam belongs to like 6 or so other companies not me. Don't get me started. Fragile belongs to Sting and is from the Nothing Like the Sun album.
~~~~~***Like Glass***~~~~~
***If blood will flow when flesh and steel are one
Drying in the color of the evening sun
Tomorrow's rain will wash the stains away
But something in our minds will always stay***
Trowa placed a gentle hand on a weathered Leo's shoulder. With a few sweeps of his long fingers a skull and crossbones appeared on what one could only call a badge. He traced it while the wind blew his duster's flaps behind him like half furled raven wings. 'Well Cap. Would you be proud of what I have become? Remember that girl? Well she killed you. She's still alive. Why? That I cannot answer you Cap. Maybe I 'm just more human then you thought.' He turned his head slightly when he heard footsteps approaching him, "Hello Quatre."
Quatre stared at the Leo ruble not sure why his friend was standing in this ancient battlefield all alone. "Trowa..?" He started softly, not entirely sure he wanted to know.
"Why?" Trowa asked cutting him off, Quatre only nodded again. The former mercenary casts his catlike gaze over the rubble before answering, "This was my life."
Quatre blinked, this horrible place was from Trowa's past. "Your life?" The blonde repeated as if he couldn't entirely believe what he heard. "You mean before us and space?" This time it was Trowa who only nodded. "Is that why you came here?"
"Yes," Trowa answered simply, if his partner wanted more of an answer then he would ask. Quatre fingered the broken cross he had found and placed in the pocket of his tan duster.
***Perhaps this final act was meant
To clinch a lifetime's argument
That nothing comes from violence
and nothing ever could
For all those born beneath an angry star
Lest we forget how fragile we are***
"It's funny you know? I could have avenged them, I still could. I killed everyone who betrayed us except one." Quatre shivered at Trowa's haunted tone. "We all know her too. There really is something wrong with me eh Cap.?"
Quatre blinked at the Leo, Trowa's attention to this suit in particular making sense. "Trowa there is nothing wrong with you! Mercy is never wrong!" The blonde knew some of the damage his friends had suffered from before their war, he knew more about what had happened to all of them after they had met. There were a few things wrong with all of them, and they all knew it, but he hated to hear his friends belittle themselves.
Trowa laughed bitterly, even after all that had happened the blonde could still be so sentimentally naive. "Oh isn't it?" He asked turning to face Quatre, who just watched him, looking concerned but not afraid. "Relena's father, Heero's almost death, a colony almost destroyed. Those aren't wrong? Well then."
"Trowa wha...Those have nothing to do with you. Those were all Une." Quatre did not understand why Trowa would feel any responsibly for anything Une did, unless it had been done while he had been undercover as one of her underlings.
"Middi," Trowa responded softly, it was not as if the blonde was a threat. "Her first name is Middi. How do I know that? She's the one I let go."
Quatre shook his head at his partner, when did he learn to feel guilt? "You cannot blame yourself for what she has done!"
"Can't I? How many people Quatre? How many people would still be alive right now if I had just shot her? Maybe your father," Trowa trailed of as he turned his head away.
Quatre reached out for Trowa only to have him turn away, it hurt. "Nothing comes form violence Trowa. Killing her wouldn't change a thing and you know that," He shivered as it started to rain.
***On and on the rain will fall
Like tears from a star
Like tears from a star
On and on the rain will say
How fragile we are
How fragile we are***
"Won't it?" Trowa snapped as he whirled back around, Quatre took a step back, expression suddenly afraid. Lowering his fist he turned his head away again, voice weak when he said a single word, "Why?"
Quatre reached for him again, this time Trowa did not turn away from him. "It won't, trust me," He pleaded, resting his head on Trowa's chest, holding him tightly. The Empath was use to Trowa being so strong, stronger then he was, seeing his friend in pain broke his heart.
Trowa wrapped his arms around Quatre, use to being clung to, "I do trust you Quatre, but that dose not change the facts. I was meant to die here."
"NO! Trowa that's why you lived," Quatre had gotten Trowa back from the dead, clearly he was not meant to die just yet. They had one and none of them had paid the ultimate price, the emotional blonde could not be happier about that.
Trowa pushed Quatre away and once again turned from him, "I lived because Middi loved me." She had made sure he had not been with the others when they had been attacked, he had survived the aftermath without her help.
Quatre's fingers tighten around the cross, without thinking he pulled it from his pocket and regretted seconds after. Trowa turned and froze, eyes locked on the gold chain and the top of a cross hanging from it. Quatre let out a cry as Trowa feel to his knees clutching his head. "TROWA!" Quatre cried as he ran to him before dropping to knees as well, "I'm sorry...I didn't think." Trowa ignored him as he started at the muddy ground, tears mingling with the rain. Quatre moved so he was kneeling in front of his hurting friend. "Trowa please? I'm sorry." Trowa still didn't respond to his friend's pleading. Quatre started at him stricken as he started to shake with his sobs, releasing emotions he had never felt before. "Oh Trowa," Quatre whispered as he pulled Trowa into his arms. "shh... it's all right. Just let it out." Trowa closed his eyes and clung to the front of Quatre's duster until his knuckles turned white. "shh...the past is the past and no one can change it."
"Quatre," Trowa said, normally clam voice a bit hoarse, roles for once completely reversed between the pair.
"Let's go home all right? I'm sure Kathrine is worried about us." Quatre knew how his friend had to be feeling, it was not as if he had never clung and cried in his life. Learning to feel more like a normal person meant dealing with pain you could not longer simply detach or compartmentalize, Heero was working through a lot as well.
"Kathy." Quatre nodded as Trowa sat up. "You coming?" Quatre asked holding out his hand. " let's go home." Quatre smiled as he lead his friends away from the rubble of the past.
***On and on the rain will fall
Like tears from a star
Like tears from a star
On and on the rain will say
How fragile we are
How fragile we are***
The cross blew in the wind from where it now hung from the Leo's shattered shoulder. The rain turn red when it hit the cross spattering blood over the Leo. As the lighting stuck an angst filled cry like that of the Banshee was herd. "NAANAAASHIIIIIIIiiiiiiiiii..."
***On and on the rain will fall
Like tears from a star
Like tears from a star
On and on the rain will say
How fragile we are
How fragile we are***
Well that was like depressing huh? Well Tro's my fave so I decided to go with it. Please be truthful when you review it. This fic is neither yaoi nor nonyaoi for that was not the point. So you decide if Quatre is just like a brother or a lover. I respect either so you tell me if you fell like it. I want to thank Kestrel ~kestrel/mv/ for the AMV that inspired this fic and so many others. Please check her out. Well Ja Ne till my next fic you read. Don't forget to drop me any ideas you have.