Cupid's Arrow
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Content: In which Sam starts to act very weird all of a sudden, centering his entire attention on a certain blue-eyed angel, Dean doesn't know what to make of this strange behavior and his own confusing feelings, Castiel just goes with the flow and Gabriel has got the time of his life.
Tags: friends to lovers, first kiss, angel mojo messing with Sam's head, love confession
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"Sam, are you alright?"
"Huh?"
Sam throws a confused glance in Dean's direction before he turns his attention back to the coffee maker. He looks as if it seems way too much for his brain to handle his brother's existence right now.
"Well, you just … you seem a little bit off, dude."
Sam stays quiet after that although Dean is absolutely sure he heard the question perfectly. Instead he takes a mug out of the cabinet and cleans it carefully as if it's the most precious thing on earth.
"Sammy?" Dean nags, teeth gritted.
"Uh … what?" Sam obviously can't take his eyes off of the mug.
Dean groans. "You act weird, man."
Sam frowns. "What do you mean? I'm fine. More than fine actually."
Yeah, sure! Fine my ass!
"Okay, listen. I won't comment on the fact that you styled your hair and put on your best pants at 7 am as if you're ready for an interview or whatever. Or that you obviously build a deep relationship with that mug in your hands." Dean shakes his head. "But let's talk about yesterday."
"What about yesterday?"
Dean roll his eyes. "You remember that chick at the bar? Hot, nerdy, totally interested in you? She was exactly your type and you wouldn't even look at her."
Sam scowls after he places the mug on the kitchen counter carefully. "So, that's a crime now? I'm not in the mood for some random hook up and there's apparently something wrong with me? Is that it?"
He looks seriously offended now and Dean feels the urge to apologize all of a sudden. He never intended to affront his brother, he just wanted to point out his slightly weird behavior. Living in close quarters nearly all their lives they always notice when something is off with the other. Just a few words or even an expression are usually enough for them. And sometimes they decide to ignore it in favor of peace and harmony, but right now Dean can't let it slide like everything is normal. He isn't able to explain why, but he feels deep in his guts that this thing is something important.
"You told the chick there's someone else," Dean continues. "Yesterday I thought it's just an excuse, but … Is there? Someone else, I mean?"
Dean knows Sam didn't have the time to meet someone in person, but in the 21th century there are more possibilities than that. His little brother likes to talk with some people on the internet – just to "chat about normal everyday stuff for once" – so it's not improbable.
"Dean ..."
"I wouldn't be mad," Dean reassures hastily. "Heaven and hell are quiet for quiet for a while now and if there's ever a perfect time to bring a little normalcy in our lives, it's right now!"
At least a secret crush would explain why he turned that chick at the bar down or why he acts like his head's in the clouds.
And it'd be a nicer explanation than something supernatural so he really hopes it's a girl.
"So? Is there a special lady on the horizon?"
Sam rolls his eyes. "There's no girl," he swears and he sounds totally sincere about it.
Dean can't help but be disappointed. He's not dense, there is absolutely something going on with his brother. You can see it in his eyes, in those little hidden smiles and in the way he takes extra care of his appearance all of a sudden.
But before he's able to continue with his interrogation, Castiel walks into the kitchen, disheveled hair and sweatpants way too low on his hips. It's a sight Dean is not sure he'll ever get used to. Sam is forgotten in an instant and Dean stares at his friend longer than it's appropriate.
Because … damn!
When Castiel moved into the bunker a few weeks ago, "not much of an angel anymore, Dean", it should have been simple. Castiel is family and you just don't leave family behind. Dean made sure to let the angel feel welcome, cleaning out a room for him just across from his, cooking, baking, paying attention. All the things he should have done properly years ago.
And although Castiel is still an angel somehow (with less mojo, but still …) he picked up human habits quickly. Annoying, distracting habits. Like eating and sleeping and being grumpy in the morning and looking utterly … gorgeous.
It's so not fair!
"Cas!" Sam announces, sounding way too happy as if Castiel's arrival is everything he waited for. He picks up the most valuable mug in the whole wide world, fills it with coffee and sugar and offers it to the angel with a big smile. "Here, I made you some coffee."
Well, actually Dean made it, but that's just a trifle, right?
Castiel looks puzzled at Sam's enthusiasm and eyes the mug as if it's about to attack him the next second. But at last he just takes it and says, "Thank you, Sam."
And Sam … is that a blush?
No, it can't be. Why should a simple Thank you and a smile work him up like this? Admittedly most of the times Dean is not able to handle something like that from Castiel, but why should Sam?
"Um … I thought I could make some pancakes," Sam suggests, biting his bottom lip.
Dean squints his eyes. "You wanna take over breakfast?" he asks incredulously. Usually Sam enjoys Dean's cooking easily enough and he only offers to cook when he wants to try some super healthy recipe including salad and an insufficient amount of meat.
"Yeah," Sam answers sharply. "You've got a problem with that?"
What the hell?
"Uh … no, go ahead," Dean says eventually.
Castiel looks back and forth between them, apparently bewildered because of the sudden tension – and well, Dean is confused about that too – before he turns towards Sam. "Thank you very much. I would love to taste your pancakes."
And Sam flushes furiously, muttering something Dean can't understand and goes to work. But not before he stumbles on his long limps and knocks over the trash can.
And if that's not super weird then Dean doesn't know what is.
Breakfast continues to be an odd affair. When Castiel compliments the pancakes (and they're seriously not that bad), Sam is rendered speechless, staring at the angel as if he's the eighth world wonder or something. And then he transforms into a blushy mess, stuttering like a two-year-old learning his first fancy words.
What. The. Fucking. Hell?
In the meantime Sam pays no attention to his brother whatsoever. Even when he tries to praise the pancakes as well, he doesn't even get a grunt. Freaking nothing.
The rest of the day remains utterly strange. Sam doesn't leave Castiel's side for a minute (obviously even considers to take him with him to the bathroom because two minutes apart are apparently more than he can bear) and the way he flushes and smiles shyly every time the angel says something is not just weird, it's downright wrong!
The worst part is that Castiel doesn't seem to notice or care that something odd is going on with Sam. On the contrary, he looks like he enjoys all the attention. When Sam invites him to his room to watch some Netflix, he happily agrees. And when Sam suggests a few hours later that they should go out for some drinks, just the two of them, Castiel approves of that idea with a smile that's normally reserved for Dean only and they are out of the door before Dean has got time to blink.
There is something ugly starting to cook inside Dean at the sight of that and he doesn't like it one bit.
And yeah, he honestly doesn't wanna feel this way. It's hideous and soul-sucking and drives him completely crazy.
But he still tries to keep it cool. Maybe Sam just ate some expired mushrooms or something which went straight into his head. Or perhaps he finally got over himself and bought some high-class weed.
Nearly anything is possible at this point (even a freaking brain tumor) and Dean's willing to merely wait and see. He can be a patient guy on occasion.
But then the next day it gets even worse!
Sam bought some fucking flowers – or maybe he even picked them himself on his morning run – and seems utterly delighted when Castiel appreciates the gesture with a long and excited lecture about pollination. Afterwards Sam suggests a trip to a local sea and Dean is only able to not lose his shit over that because Castiel agrees with the most beautiful smile ever and asks Dean enthusiastically if he wants to tag along. And Dean almost says yes since the angel looks so hopeful as if the other man's company would be the icing on his cake, but in the end he declines because Sam seems seconds away from scratching his eyes out and Dean seriously doesn't need hours of hostile glaring by his brother (or maybe even real violence). It feels even more uncomfortable than the lovesick puppy eyes.
And it makes Dean more than sure that this isn't Sam.
At least not the Sam he knows.
The Sam he knows treats Castiel like a brother and enjoys geeking out over stuff no one else cares about. The Sam he knows cares about Dean a great deal and would never deliberately hurt him.
And Sam is quite aware of Dean's feelings for a certain blue-eyed angel. Admittedly he never said it out loud (and neither did Dean), but he's hinting and teasing for months now. He even encouraged his brother on several occasions to spend some nice quality time with Castiel.
So why would that change all of a sudden?
Sure, it's not entirely impossible that Sam had some kind of epiphany the other day and realized out of the blue that he likes Castiel as more than just a friend. Dean wouldn't even blame him for this. But even if this would have been the case somehow, Sam would never have acted like this right in front of Dean. He wouldn't behave like the biggest jerk ever who doesn't give a damn about Dean's emotions.
No, there is something else going on here.
And Dean seriously needs to find an answer before Sam would kill him out of jealousy or propose to Castiel with some red roses and a pretty ring.
And Dean doesn't even know which one of those two would be worse.
Damn.
He really needs a freaking good explanation for this whole mess.
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Surprisingly Dean finds the answer in a bar.
Or – more accurately – it finds him.
In the shape of a fucking archangel.
As soon as Dean spots Gabriel sitting at the counter with a shit-eating grin on his lips he just knows immediately that this freaking bastard has something to do with Sam strange behavior the past few days. This can't be a goddamned coincidence!
"Hello, Dean-o," he greets the hunter cheerfully as if they're some good friends meeting for a beer. "Nice to see you again."
"Gabriel -" Dean presses through gritted teeth.
"Where is the rest of your boyband?" the angel asks, ignoring Dean's stormy face completely. "Oh wait, let me guess – they're way too busy making moony eyes at each other right? Or at least your precious brother is, Cassie is probably too oblivious to realize what's going on." He sighs dramatically. "And so you left them at the Bat Cave and escaped since you can't stand watching them anymore. Am I wrong?"
Or course he's not, but Dean refrains from agreeing. Instead he shoots him a dark look, not caring at all that Gabriel could smite him here and now without even lifting a finger.
"What did you do to Sam?" Dean wants to know. "Is this one of your sick jokes again?"
"First of all, I'm seriously hurt that you can't appreciate my work," Gabriel huffs. "The things I create, the chaos and confusion I build – it's a masterpiece. You should feel honored that you were able to experience it at close range."
Dean rolls his eyes really fucking hard. "Just shut up and tell me what you did to Sam? Why is he acting like … like ..."
"Like a love-struck girl?" Gabriel helps out, utterly joyful. "Well, it was more or less an accident."
"An accident?" Dean exclaims, but flinches a moment later when several heads jerk in his direction. He starts to squirm uncomfortably and inches closer to the angel. "What do you mean? Did you whammy him or something? Did you kill all his brain cells and turn him into a blushing idiot?"
Gabriel laughs and Dean really needs to suppress the urge to punch the douchebag in the face. "Well, a cupid's arrow can do weird things to humans."
Dean's eyes widen. "A cupid's arrow?" he hisses. "Why the fuck were you shooting arrows all over the place?"
"I actually planned to hit you, Dean-o."
Dean freezes and stares wordlessly at the man in front of him.
Did he seriously hear that right?
But why –?
"I …" he starts, not sure what to reply.
"Yeah, I actually intended to shoot your stupid face," Gabriel continues. "I wanted to kick your ass – and Cassie's as well – since you two dumbasses are obviously incapable of confessing your deep and true love for each other all on your own. So I took matters into my own hands since I was sick of watching all the fucking pining."
Dean refuses to turn beet red because of these words, but it's really hard work.
"But then suddenly your freakishly tall and inconveniently ill-timed brother got in the way," Gabriel complains. "And now … well, the cupid's magic works on the wrong Winchester. Although I've gotta say it's highly entertaining."
Dean drops onto the bar stool next to Gabriel and takes a deep breath. On the one hand he's fucking relieved to finally have confirmation that there's something supernatural going on and Sam doesn't act on his own accounts. But on the other hand he feels like utter shit because he seriously doesn't want to talk about his feelings for Castiel with freaking Gabriel.
"How do we reverse this mess?", Dean asks, narrowing his eyes and hoping that Gabriel doesn't start speaking of their "deep and true love" again.
Because it took a really long time to admit this to himself and he sure as hell isn't ready to spill his guts to an archangel who likes to kill people over and over again for fun.
"Well, that's not gonna be easy," Gabriel says and doesn't sound sorry in the slightest. There's actually an amused glint in his eyes as if he can't wait to learn what will happen next. "It's not like Sam's feelings are forced. Free will and all that stuff."
He winks at Dean and the hunter can't help but feel a little shaky.
"What are you saying?" he demands to know. "Is Sam … is he really …?"
Gabriel snorts and takes a gulp of the beer in front of him. "Of course Sam loves Castiel. That's out of the question, isn't it?"
Now Dean really feels sick.
"A cupid's arrow can't force feelings that aren't already there," Gabriel explains. "And Sam loves Cassie. As a friend and a brother. But because of my little – well, I wouldn't really call it 'mistake' since the whole thing is super hilarious and I'm actually quite delighted with the outcome -"
"Cut the crap and come to the point!" Dean interjects indignantly. He seriously can't look at the glee in the angel's face any longer.
"Your little brother is confused," Gabriel summarizes. "There is all this familial love inside him, mixing itself with the cupid's magic – and well, it's a little bit of an overload. So he focuses on Blue Eyes and blends everything else out."
Dean clenches his fists and closes his eyes for a minute, inhaling deeply. The angel's words are making him fidgety and he honestly doesn't know what to think of this whole thing.
"So, how can he break this damned mind whammy?" he finally asks in a gruff voice, eyeing Gabriel closely.
The angel just shrugs and leans back. "Just make things clear for our dear Sam again," Gabriel says. "Remind him that there's something else out in the world than Cassie. It'll work just fine."
Dean scowls. "And how should I do that? He barely looks at me."
"How should I know, Dean-o?" Gabriel shakes his head. "Slap him in the face. Tell him you love him. Something like that. The power of true love is more powerful than anything."
Dean rolls his eyes and reminds himself for the tenth time to not draw his weapon and shoot the asshat in the face. He'd feel good for about two seconds before Gabriel would throw him forcefully across the room.
"This is your mess," he hisses. "You should be the one cleaning it up."
Gabriel snorts. "This is all your fault, Dean," he objects. "Because you can't be honest with yourself and tell the whole world that you'd like to grab our favorite angel and kiss him senseless. Or do you want to be grabbed instead? You seem like you'd -"
"Enough!" Dean yells, leaping to his feet. "Just … stay away from us!"
"But you are so entertaining!"
Dean bares his teeth. "Goodbye, Gabriel. I hope to never fucking see you again."
"I love you too, Dean," Gabriel calls after him, chuckling amused. "And send Sam and Cassie my regards."
Dean clenches his jaw and gets the hell out of the bar.
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Dean hopes that by some miracle everything is back to normal when he arrives back at the bunker. Maybe he gets lucky for a change or whatever.
But the second he finds Sam and Castiel in the library, the angel studying a book with earnest concentration and his brother gazing at Castiel like a lovesick puppy, it's more then clear that his prayers stayed unanswered.
Well, no surprise there.
Dean grinds his teeth and tries to ignore Sam's smitten expression while saying, "Sammy? Can I talk to you for a minute in the kitchen?"
As expected Sam doesn't acknowledge his existence, only his fingers twitching once.
Fortunately Castiel didn't lose his hearing. He looks up and exchanges a quick glance with Dean before he turns toward Sam. "This is your brother's serious face, Sam."
Sam seems way too happy with Castiel paying attention to him to even bother listening to words and reason. There's just a dopey smile on his lips and Dean wants to wipe it off without any mercy.
"C'mon, Sam," Dean grumbles, grabbing Sam's upper arm and pulling him onto his feet. "This is important."
Sam grunts and seems seconds away from protesting excessively, but then Castiel wraps his hand around Sam's wrist and says, "I will stay here and wait for you."
This statement obviously seems to melt Sam's heart instantly. His brother smiles broadly while blushing like a teenage virgin and his resistance to Dean vanishes straightaway. He still seems kinda upset for leaving the angel in the first place, but nonetheless he follows his big brother like a dutiful puppy and apparently fights back the urge to grouch again.
And Dean tries his best not to be angry with him because this seriously isn't his fault. He can't help it that the cupid's magic is confusing him like that and making him attune to Castiel only.
"Dean?" Castiel's voice makes Dean stop right before the corner.
Dean focuses his eyes on the angel. "Yeah, Cas?"
"Is everything alright?" he asks, tilting his head to one side and making Dean's heart jump just because of this tiny and very familiar movement.
"Um, yeah." Dean tries to appear nonchalant but he fears he's overacting spectacularly. Fortunately Castiel doesn't seem to see through his poor game. "Just a tiny family situation. I'll handle it."
Of course he could tell Castiel the truth, confessing the whole story, but he can't bring himself to do it. He wants to give Gabriel's advice of using the fucking power of love or whatever a shot first before involving the angel. And he absolutely doesn't want to talk about the goddamned reason why the archangel thought this whole fiasco was a good idea in the first place.
"Alright," Castiel says, watching Dean thoughtfully. "But please tell me if there is anything I can do to help."
Dean isn't sure if he wants to snort, roll his eyes or freaking smile at him. In the end he just shrugs and says, "Yeah, sure."
"And would you maybe like to join Sam and I later this evening?" Castiel asks, his expression turning soft. "We're intending to watch some Netflix and we would appreciate your company."
Sam starts to pout, obviously not at all happy with this change of plans, but Dean has got only eyes for Castiel who seems so hopeful, his eyes glinting. And Dean couldn't have said no even if he would have wanted to.
"I'd love to," he answers. "Thanks."
Castiel beams as if these are the best news ever before he turns his attention back to the book in front of him.
Dean watches him a second silently, the way he squints his eyes and runs his fingers through his already messy hair, looking downright gorgeous and delicious ... and then the hunter suddenly notices that his brother beside him is doing the exact same thing, a dreamy expression on his face Dean seriously doesn't want to see ever again.
He growls under his breath and pushes Sam toward the kitchen.
"Okay, Sammy, we really need to talk," he grumbles. "And you'll listen, do you hear me?"
Sam snorts. "I don't think -"
"That's the problem!" Dean interrupts. "You're not thinking, you idiot. Don't you realize how fucked-up this whole situation is?"
Sam frowns. "I have no idea what you're talking about. And I really should -"
Dean grasps Sam's shirt and keeps him from moving back to Castiel. "No, no, no! You're not going back to the library. You're staying right here and listen to me talking about Gabriel and fucking cupid's arrows."
Sam stops squirming all of a sudden and for the first time since the whole mess started he looks Dean straight into the eyes. "Gabriel? Arrows?"
Dean sighs. "Please tell me your brain isn't so mellow yet that you can't see what's going on here! Gabriel shot a freaking arrow at you and now you're all mushy in the head. You can't see past Cas."
Sam scowls at him. "I'm not … mushy."
Dean crosses his arms in front of his chest. "Oh really? Then think about the last two days, bitch. You're telling me that's your normal behavior? Making goo-goo eyes at Cas all the damn time?" He huffs. "That's not you, Sammy. That's the angel mojo messing with your head."
"I'm not ..."
"You're ignoring me," Dean continues, his voice a little unsteady. "You act like I'm not here. Or you treat me like dirt, as if I'm annoying you by breathing the same air. And I really fucking hate it." He lowers his head a bit, not at all happy with spilling his guts, but knowing damn well that he can't avoid this. "I miss my brother. My stupid, snarky, nerdy brother who lectures me at least twice a day on the importance of salad."
Sam's expression changes a tiny bit. It's not much yet, but the anger in his eyes retreats slightly and Dean sees that as a sign to go on.
"I love you," he finally says. "I love you and I know you love me too. So just say it and break the fucking spell."
"Dean ..."
There is hesitation flickering in Sam's eyes. The words are clearly affecting him, but it's not enough yet.
"I'm sure you know how ..." Dean draws in a shaking breath, "... how I feel about Cas. I never said it, but you're probably suspecting it since there's no one on this planet who knows me like you. And if your feelings for Cas would be genuine, then I would step back. I wouldn't play the 'I saw him first'-card or anything, I'd just … let you do your thing."
Dean grits his teeth. He honestly hates this and he seriously hopes he'll get a chance to punch Gabriel on the nose at some point for forcing him to get sappy and emotional.
"But this is not real, Sammy," Dean urges. "And seeing you looking at Cas like that …right in front of me … well, it's not fun. I … I don't ..."
Sam wrinkles his forehead, the dazed fog in his eyes decreasing a bit. "I'm … hurting you?"
Dean wants to yell "No!", make a lame joke and get the hell out of here, but it actually seems to work so he pulls himself together and hopes it'll be over soon.
"Yes, it hurts," he admits, inhaling deeply. "It makes me feel all these stupid things I don't wanna feel and … I don't like it, man. It's driving me mad."
Sam starts to stagger a bit and grabs the kitchen counter hastily, preventing himself from falling over. Dean is at his side promptly, gripping his shoulder and watching him worriedly.
"I'm … hurting you?" Sam whispers. "I'm hurting you?"
His eyes widen when the realization hits him with full force. "I don't wanna hurt you, Dean. I don't ..."
He looks seriously pained now and rubs his temples as if he's fighting a growing headache. And although it's honestly not nice for Dean to see his brother like this he can't help but feel relieved at the same time since there are suddenly so much more emotions on Sam's face than dreaminess. Dean notices confusion, guilt and embarrassment.
"I'm … I'm ..." Sam stammers. "Oh my God!"
He groans wholeheartedly, dropping onto one of the chairs and burying his face in his big hands.
"Are you okay, Sammy?" Dean asks concerned, still rubbing Sam's shoulder and not at all keen to let go anytime soon.
"No," comes Sam's muffled response. "I'm not ..."
"Oh c'mon, it's not your fault." Dean even tries to smile and although it looks a little pathetic he's still pleased with himself. "All this angel mojo inside your head – it'd make everyone do crazy stuff. And I mean, you didn't sing Cas any awkward love songs or whatever." He hesitates a second before he checks, "You didn't, right?"
"No, I didn't," Sam says, sounding distressed. "But ..."
Dean really wants to tease his brother to make the tension in the room go away, but he doubts Sam would take it lightly. Furthermore he's not sure he would be up for it himself. The whole situation doesn't feel good in the slightest and it'll probably take some time before they're both able to laugh about it.
"I'm … my head is spinning," Sam says, rubbing his eyes forcefully. "It's all very confusing."
"Yeah, I bet," Dean mumbles. He honestly doesn't want to know how Sam's mind looks like right now. It's probably a fucking roller coaster in there, everything overturning like crazy and making him dizzy and nauseous. At least he seems somewhat green about the gills.
"I … I'll lie down a bit," Sam finally announces, rising slowly from his seat. "Just … go to my room, burn the poems and sleep."
Dean can't help it, his lips start to twitch upwards slightly. "Poems?"
Sam casts him a dark glance. "Don't, okay?"
"Alright, alright." Dean holds his hands up in defeat. "I won't say anything."
Especially since the picture of smitten Sam writing cheesy love poems for Castiel all night isn't as funny as Dean imagined it to be.
"But you're sure you're okay?" Dean asks once again.
Sam heads toward the hallway, shaking his head. "No, dude, I'm really not. Part of me wants to go back to the library asap. Fortunately the need to go to my room and hide underneath the sheets is stronger." He takes a deep breath. "I'm so sorry, Dean."
"No, Sammy -"
"No, please, just let me say this," Sam asks and Dean just nods automatically, not able to deny the puppy dog eyes anything. "I'm so sorry for hurting you, Dean. It's still a bit fuzzy in my head but I remember … I just …"
"Dude," Dean interjects. "I can't really be mad at you because you care for Cas, right? Gabriel is the one who needs to apologize, not you!"
Sam snorts. "Yeah, as if that'd ever happen."
Unfortunately Dean has to agree with him, recalling Gabriel's joyful expression quite well.
"Okay, I'll … hide in my room now," Sam announces, pointing in a vague direction. "And I'll pray that the urge to go back to Cas will fade soon."
Dean huffs. "You don't need to avoid him, Sam."
But Sam just waves him off, mumbles something incoherent and rushes off, most likely eager to reach his bedroom and lock himself inside before the rest of the mojo in his system would force him to join Castiel in the library again.
Dean stays behind, closing his eyes for a few minutes and cursing Gabriel all over again. Finally he grabs a beer, downs it in record time and snatches another one from the refrigerator before moving toward the library.
Castiel sits at the exact same spot where they left him fifteen minutes ago. But instead of studying the thick book in front of him he just leans back in his chair and watches Dean coming closer.
"Um ..." Dean says intelligibly, feeling hot under Castiel's intense gaze. "I … uh, grabbed myself a beer and forgot to ask if you maybe want one too."
Castiel makes a soft noise in the back of his throat that Dean can't really decipher. "Is Sam alright?"
Dean steps a little closer. "Did you … uh, listen in?"
Castiel is a celestial being after all, always reminding the Winchesters of that fact, and to listen to a conversation two rooms over is probably not that much of an effort for him. It presumably requires more energy tuning them out than the other way around.
"I could have," Castiel says, confirming Dean's thoughts. "But it is not the polite thing to do. Although I heard something about Gabriel and a cupid's arrow."
Dean clears his throat. "Yeah, he … your brother is a big douche."
Castiel nods along. "I should have realized sooner." He seems to contemplate what the hell went wrong that he wasn't able to pinpoint the whole situation. "I noticed Sam's changed behavior and I started to wonder myself if there is maybe something not quite right with him, but ..."
"But?" Dean urges. His chest feels tight all of a sudden and a small part of himself fears that Castiel is gonna say something Dean's not ready to hear.
"I like spending time with Sam," Castiel continues. "I enjoyed our talks very much and I didn't think about questioning it."
Dean attempts to smile. "Hey, it's alright. It doesn't mean he can't stand you when he's not on angel drugs or something."
"I know, Dean." Castiel sounds amused now. "I know how all of this works. And I'm quite honored that Sam obviously feels so strongly for me that the cupid's powers showed that effect on him. Although he must be very confused right now." He creases his forehead. "Maybe I should make sure he's okay."
Dean thought about letting Castiel check out his brother before since he can't really trust Gabriel's words that everything's gonna be alright as soon as the spell is broken. But on the other hand Castiel doesn't seem freaked out either, just worried about Sam's emotional well-being.
"Maybe give him some time," Dean counters. "I mean, he's not in any danger or something, right?"
Castiel shakes his head instantly. "No, not at all."
Dean can't help but sigh relieved. "Right now he's just … confused. And embarrassed. He probably won't look you into the eyes for a few days or even weeks. Perhaps he'll avoid you altogether. Don't take it personally."
Castiel doesn't seem utterly thrilled because of this prospect, but he nods anyway, lowering his gaze. Dean jumps at his side in a matter of milliseconds without even thinking about it and squeezes his shoulder reassuringly.
"It's gonna be fine, Cas," he promises. "He'll come around and you'll nerd over your nerdy stuff again in no time, you'll see." He considers pulling Castiel into a hug, but refrains from it in the last moment. "How about … we'll watch some Netflix, just you and me. Some beer, some popcorn. How does that sound?"
Castiel looks up, his blue eyes suddenly consuming Dean in a way that makes the hunter squirm. "Dean?"
Dean needs a few seconds to find his voice again. "Um … yeah?"
"Why did Gabriel shoot Sam with an arrow?"
Dean wants to take a step back, keep some distance between them, but as many times before he just can't. It's as if his legs refuse to move as soon as he's close enough to feel the angel's breath on his skin and the heat radiating from his body.
"Um … because he's a giant asshole and likes to play tricks?" He knows he sounds unsure, like he's asking a question and not telling a statement.
"For fun and games?" Castiel asks. "Because he finds enjoyment in your suffering?"
Dean is about to list all the stupid shit Gabriel pulled in the past – Groundhog Day, TV Wonderland –, but all he manages is a weak, "Uh … yeah?"
Castiel doesn't doesn't seem convinced and Dean can't really blame him. "Did he intend to shoot Sam?"
Dean rises an eyebrow and tries to ignore his increasing heartbeat. "Well …"
Suddenly Castiel is closer than before, mere inches separating him, and Dean is sure as hell that he won't be able to form any coherent thought now. He'll be lucky if he'll achieve to speak some reasonable words.
"Do you want to know what I think?" Castiel asks and it sounds like a fucking challenge.
Dean just blinks. "Um … sure."
"I think Gabriel planned to hit someone else," Castiel says in a calm voice as if he would state boring facts or something. "But for some reason he missed."
Dean frowns. "Why –?"
"Why would I think that?" Castiel asks. "Maybe because I met my brother about a week ago and he said, 'You and the bow-legged hunter should get your shit together or I will do something about it because your stupid pining is interfering with the angel radio!'."
Dean just stares and blinks because he's got honestly no idea what else to do.
Stares and blinks.
Before he finally says, "You've met Gabriel? Why didn't you tell me?"
Castiel rolls his eyes at him. "That is your issue with this?"
Dean shrugs halfheartedly. "Well …"
"I think that Gabriel intended to hit you with the arrow to force you to confess your feelings," Castiel continues without batting an eye. "Because you wouldn't have been as subtle as Sam."
Dean snorts at 'subtle' although he, after some careful thinking, reluctantly agrees. Sure, Sam behaved like a boy with a major crush, but obviously he didn't give some spontaneous love speeches or even tried to initiate anything physical. He was just happy with Castiel's attention.
But Dean … shit, if that fucking arrow really would have hit its actual target, Dean probably would have acted quite differently. Admittedly, there would have been plenty of blushing and stuttering as well, but additionally a lot more love declarations and maybe even a proposal or two after only a few seconds. Or twenty.
Because yeah, Dean is seriously that freaking gone on the guy!
"I'm …" he says, biting his bottom lip nervously. He can't exactly deny it anymore, right? Sure, he'd been happy to repress any strong feelings he might have, always eager to never show it, but at some point it started to get pathetic (definitely since purgatory, maybe even before that). And he sure as hell knows that he won't be able to lie into the angel's face when Castiel just asks him directly about his emotions.
"Dean," Castiel whispers and as always Dean's name sounds like something else out of the angel's mouth. "If you're afraid that your feelings might not be reciprocated, I can assure that is not the case. You know that, right?"
Dean takes a deep breath. "Yeah."
"So why are you still hesitating?"
"Honestly?" Dean looks right into those otherworldly blue eyes and although his pulse is racing and he'll probably die from a heart attack in a few moments, he feels weirdly calm at the same time. "I don't know."
Castiel smiles easily. "Maybe we should just make it up as we go."
Dean chuckles quietly, watching the man in front of him fondly, but starts to freeze immediately when Castiel touches his jaw, his thumb rubbing over his cheekbone.
"Yeah," Dean croaks, "Maybe we should."
And when Castiel leans in Dean can't bring himself to feel scared anymore.
Dean thought about this moment a lot in the past few months, fuck, years. He imagined it to be quick and sweet. The most innocent kiss he ever received, just a simple peck, a brush of lips. And still the most awesome thing ever.
At the same time he pictured it to be hot and messy. Passion and heat all over the place, ripping each other's clothes off in the blink of an eye. Tongue and teeth and shameless grinding.
In the end it turns out slow and deep and seriously the most awesome thing ever.
Castiel digs his fingers into Dean's hair and the hunter is just utterly lost. His whole system is on fucking overload and at the same time he can't get enough of this, even if it would kill him someday (and Dean's positive that it'll absolutely happen eventually). There's no inch between them anymore, bodies pressed against each other, their breaths mingled.
How the hell could Dean have been so stupid to deny himself this for so freaking long?
At some point Castiel pulls away a little bit and Dean is about to protest (to whine pathetically, to be exact), but almost immediately he notices the serious lack of oxygen in his lungs and he sucks in a sharp breath. Typical Castiel – even during an intense make-out session he's looking out for Dean.
"Damn," he whispers in awe after there is enough air in all the proper places again.
"I agree," Castiel says amused, his kiss-swollen lips spread into a wide smile.
Dean can't help but return it. "But at the same time I really hate this."
Castiel squints his eyes, clearly confused. "You didn't seem to hate it."
Dean's eyes widen when he realizes how that might have sounded. Stupid angels, making him all dizzy and killing his brain cells!
"No, no!" he counters promptly. "This here," he points between them, "this is so fucking awesome! It's … it's … it's better than pie."
Dean sees the surprise in Castiel's features because he absolutely knows that Dean would marry some delicious pie on the spot if it'd be legal.
"No, I meant that I hate the fact that we're here because of your douche-brother." Dean scoffs, picturing Gabriel's smug face.
But Castiel shakes his head. "We're here because of us, Dean. Because of our choices and mistakes and especially because of our bond. And Gabriel may think he played a crucial part in all of this, but I honestly don't see it this way. He shot Sam and instead of telling us instantly he decided to have some 'fun' with it and let Sam suffer. That's all he did."
Of course he's got a point, but nonetheless Dean wants to argue that Gabriel probably thinks otherwise, grinning from ear to ear in some hidden corner of heaven full with candy and women, and Dean seriously hates that thought. But Castiel just huffs, pulls him in for another mind-blowing kiss and Dean's brain just stops working altogether.
He can seriously get used to this.
"How about we go in my room and … well, watch some Netflix?" Dean suggests after he's able to form some coherent words much later. "Enjoy the evening?"
Castiel seems hesitant all of a sudden and Dean fears he's gone too far, pushed too hard (although he didn't mean the offer primarily in a sexual way) and he's about to backpedal when Castiel says, "But what about Sam?"
Dean's heart can't help but seize up a bit at the concern in the angel's voice. "Look, Cas, I know this sucks, but Sam really needs some time for himself. I will check on him later, you, however, should … um, you should keep away from him for now. Like I said, don't take it personally."
Castiel's lips turn downwards. "I just want to tell him there is nothing to be embarrassed about."
"He knows that," Dean assures. "He's a smart guy and the logical part of his brain is most likely telling him right now that all of this isn't his fault and he doesn't need to feel ashamed. But the funny thing about humans is, well, we kinda do anyhow." He shrugs. "Don't worry, he'll come around eventually."
"Maybe I could buy him some ice cream," Castiel says. "Some people think it's a powerful cure."
Dean laughs aloud and pats Castiel's shoulder. "Yeah, do that, man," he encourages the angel, smiling at the image of his brother and his angel eating chocolate chip ice cream together on the couch and watching some chick flicks. "You'll see, just a few days and you'll be back to normal."
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x
In the end it only takes fourteen hours.
Sam wants to flee the first time he encounters Castiel in the kitchen the next morning, his face beet red, but when the angel greets him with the words, "Do you need my help burning Gabriel's ass?" (and seriously, where the hell did he learn that phrase?) Sam can't help but chuckle and suddenly they're sitting at the same table and Castiel tells him some stupid joke about two fighting lawn gnomes that makes Sam laugh so hard he nearly falls off his chair.
And okay, throughout their whole conversation Sam avoids Castiel's direct gaze and sometimes there is still a light blush, but it's honestly more than Dean would have guessed.
And when they decide to continue their translation of some ancient text Dean can't even feel a little bit jealous of his brother for occupying the angel's time again. Especially when Castiel is determined to kiss him fucking senseless and suck all the oxygen out of Dean's lungs again before he follows Sam to the library.
Damn, Dean's not sure at all if he'll be able to survive this.
But he loves to take the risk.
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And somewhere in a hidden corner in heaven Gabriel smiles smugly.