Matthew raises his head when he hears the music. He turns a smile over to the music player in the corner of his small cozy room, laughing lightly and standing. He goes to the center of the room and holds his hands out to the proper positions he learned. With a soft hum he moves about the room, counting softly to himself and giggling every so often. The dance is one of his favorites.
"Matt! You ready bro?" At the call of his name Matthew fumbles. He squeaks out a shaky 'yes' and turns to the doorway where Alfred is already staring at him with a raised eyebrow. Matthew had actually been waiting for him and got a little lost in time when Alfred hadn't been fully ready. Suddenly Alfred snickers.
"Were you dancing by yourself again?" Alfred smirks at him. Matthew puffs up in a small pout, shaking his head back and forth.
"N-no!" Even though he's trying to sound forceful Alfred waves off his words.
"It's okay, you can tell me Matt. I'm mature, I can take it!" Alfred smiles cockily, trying to make himself cooler than Matthew thinks he is. He eyes his brother's outfit up and down, subconsciously rubbing at his own sleeves. The little get together Arthur is hosting, isn't going to be so little, as much as it is him trying to show off the way Alfred and Matthew turned out with their countries. He sighs and scrunches up his face.
"Your tie is on backwards," He points out. Alfred blinks dumbly at him then lifts up his tie to inspect it. With a shrug he lets it flop down.
"Whatever, it'll piss off Arthur. Let's go," Alfred nods his head in the direction of the door and Matthew sighs again but follows. When he's sure Alfred isn't paying attention he glances sheepishly over his shoulder into his room.
"Knock 'em dead kiddo," Gilbert winks at him and raises a casual thumbs up. His legs are faded out near his feet, nearly completely see through and even his fingers have traces of disappearing. Matthew smiles a little flustered to himself and walks out of the house with Alfred though his mind stays on the once-upon-a-time country still inside. Neither of them can explain why though they tried to find reasons. It just happens that no one can see Gilbert except for Matthew now.
–
The first time Matthew sees Prussia is weird for him. Not that he hasn't actually seen Prussia before, but it's the first time he's seen him like this. There's something insanely odd about the way his feet don't touch the ground, like he doesn't have feet at all. The way he tries to grab pens and papers, yet the items seem to float right through them. It's nearly heartbreaking the way he says things out loud, and yet no one seems to hear him.
Matthew turns his head down sharply when he thinks the old country might be looking his way. He doesn't really need any attention called to him, not that any one would notice him anyway. It's his curse to not be seen, to be overshadowed. He's tried, but something always comes up to stop his attempts.
"Hey," He jumps at the word so close to his ear. He turns dramatically to Prussia leaning down to be face to face with him. Never before would he have thought this loud person would ever pay attention to him. He's practically frozen in his spot as Prussia narrows his eyes at him.
"Can you see me?" Matthew gulps at the question, not fearing anyone would see him nodding his head he does so gently. Like a floodgate opening Prussia flops to the ground, staring up at him with something akin to tears in his eyes.
"At least someone does," Prussia chokes out a laugh, rubbing hazardously at his eyes to make it seem like he's not crying. Matthew knows that feeling all to well, tearing up a little himself and secretly trying to wipe away his own emotions.
"What's your name?" Prussia doesn't bother to whisper.
"Canada," Matthew does. The old country scoffs and stands shakily to sit on the table criss cross, not afraid someone would see him.
"I mean your name name," He clarifies. Matthew makes a small 'oh' noise, pulling his arms around himself.
"Matthew," He says. Prussia cackles and holds out his hand carelessly.
"Gilbert." Matthew flushes just a little at the wink the old country throws his way, but takes his hand gently.
–
The party is not fun. Or at least in Matthew's opinion. He doesn't much care for big get togethers, always feeling a little too swept up in the crowd. He has since learned to accept the bustle but even sometimes he gets a little irritated. Luckily this time he manages to not get pulled away from Alfred when he drags him closer to Arthur.
"Your tie is on wrong," Is the first thing he says. Mattie smiles to himself as Alfred rattles off fake apologies, pretending to look ashamed with a smirk hiding underneath. He giggles softly then turns his attention to the others. Most nations are talking to their own separate groups, every so often shifting to be a part of another cluster.
He spies Iceland from across the room, rolling his eyes at something Denmark says. When the little country looks over at him, Matthew waves shyly. With the smallest of smiles Iceland waves back then returns to his conversation. Matthew smiles proudly to himself mostly. He's just recently been talking to the other, bonding over climate and their animal friends.
He's roughly shoved, on accident in his own mind, but stumbles forward. He nearly musters up a glare at the person who ran into him but seeing Spain hurriedly move past him towards Belgium, he let's it 's no use making a scene if the moment has passed. He twists up his nose. He has gotten more confident over the past few years, speaking up more, managing to get the attention of more people. It's strange to have people really see him, but it's not unpleasant.
He's pushed again, but this time into a wall and held there. With a small squeak he tries to push away but the person leaning against him is stronger by just enough. He takes a deep breath and pushes again.
"Excuse me," He says, louder than he normally talks. The country doesn't hear him. He struggles again, harder this time and channels his voice.
"Excuse me," It comes out a little more sharper than he wishes but he's released. He straightens his outfit and blinks at Russia, trying to make himself stand just a hint higher at the odd look the taller country gives him.
"Thank you," He says as curtly as possible and moves away from the wall. He sides back up to Alfred, now with his tie on the proper way because Arthur fixed it. He smiles as best he can, standing next to his brother, wondering if he's being overshadowed once again.
"Chin up Matthew," Arthur orders seamlessly, taking a sip of his tea without a second glance. Matthew almost pouts but does so, his confidence actually pretty high, especially since Arthur actually saw him. He keeps his snickering quiet when Alfred looks down and hunches his shoulders on purpose. It earns him a glare from the British man.
With the moment of being able to get Russia off him, the next time Matthew is shoved he snaps his head around instantly.
"Excuse you," He says without a second thought. Spain pauses and stares at him before breaking into an awkward laugh.
"Lo siento mi amigo!" He says cheerfully and then runs off again. At the sudden realization to what he did, Matthew turns back to his family sheepishly, though smiling a little proud.
"Damn Mattie," Alfred laughs and throws an arm over his shoulder. Matthew laughs softly, but his mind is elsewhere. All he can think about is telling Gilbert that he stood up for himself, wanting to see the bright smile on his friend's face when he gets home.
–
"Why do you do that?" Gilbert raises an eyebrow at him, sitting on the desk without a care in the world. Matthew just shrinks in on himself.
"Do what?" He responds absently, trying to look like he's paying attention though he's not sure why he bothers too much. Gilbert scoffs.
"Why do you let people walk all over you? Doesn't that get, I don't know, tiring?" The loud country flops over to his side dramatically. Matthew stifles a giggle knowing he'd be the only one heard if at all. It takes him a few seconds to respond, not knowing exactly how to.
"I guess so," He finally pushes out. Gilbert groans at his answer and chooses not to say another word until the meeting is over. With a sigh Matthew packs up his things and prepares to say goodbye to Gilbert since the once country usually spends his days floating absently by his brother and other friends, only to find Gilbert staring at him expectantly.
"What? You think I'm going to let you get away with that? No way birdie, I'm coming over to show you how to stand up for yourself." Gilbert announces loudly. Matthew looks around him to check for prying eyes only to remember no one else can actually hear Gilbert.
"Uhm-" Is the closest to words he can manage. Gilbert cackles and links their arms together, pulling Matthew down the hallway and outside.
"Where to?" He bounces on his heels, what is left of them at least. Matthew is frazzled. He points to his car and Gilbert drags him over.
"Come on! Let me see your place!" He cheers and playfully pokes Mathew to open the doors. Instead of opening them he drops the keys on accident. He covers his face and takes a deep breath.
"Birdie you alright?" He peeks through his fingers to Gilbert now in front of him with concern clear on his face. He starts to nod his head but his body betrays him. He shakes his head quickly then hides again.
"Do you not have people over often?" He sighs to that question and picks up his keys, playing with them between his fingers.
"Try not at all," He mumbles. Gilbert scrunches up his nose then huffs out a puff of air.
"Well,"He says grabbing Matthew by the hand tightly. He smirks openly when Matthew blinks at him.
"No time like the present! Come on before I fade more!" He cheers. Slowly Matthew smiles back at him, finally opening the car door.
–
"So then I said-"
"Alfred I'd like to go home sometime tonight," Matthew interrupts his brother's story, earning him a whine in response. Alfred pouts but does begin to say goodbyes after hurriedly finishing his tale. Matthew gives an awkward half hug to Iceland and then gets completely bombarded by Denmark. He struggles just enough to get the other off him, waving shyly as they walk out of the building.
He managed to talk to Iceland earlier in the night, bringing him into that small group for a good hour of talking. He didn't know he had so much in common with the Nordics. Maybe he'll be able to play hockey with someone now.
"Alright alright I'm ready," Alfred nudges him playfully and they walk out towards the car. Matthew immediately pulls off his stuffy shirt in exchange for a long sleeve he stashed in the car. He snuggles into it happily.
"I want one," Alfred stares at him with puppy dog eyes. Matthew doesn't even think, just reaches into the backseat and pulls out another long sleeve.
"Hell yes," Alfred removes his own shirt happily to replace it with the much softer one Matthew gives him. With the change of clothes the atmosphere between them is much more comfy.
"How you holding up with the election and things?" Matthew watches out the window into the darkness to see the lights pass as Alfred drives down towards the airport.
"Eeehhhhhhh," Alfred groans. Matthew laughs into his sleeve covered hand. His brother always did have a hard time during election years. He listens to Alfred ramble on and on about how dumb everything is and how his head hurts from all the arguing going on all while playing with his sleeves. The red lights of the passing cars reminding him of the one he's going home too.
–
Matthew is all too aware of Gilbert looming over his shoulder. The paper work in front of him is slightly less daunting with the once country judging his every move. With every shift of his arm and every ruffle of paper, he can sense Gilbert's eyes on him, following the motion and it's finally starting to really get under his skin. He turns his chair, peeking over his shoulder somewhat timidly at Gilbert.
"Uh," He says quietly. Gilbert leans down to be face to face with him, narrowing his eyes. Matthew swallows down his nerves, trying to remain calm under the scrutinizing look.
"Why do you have so many turtle necks?" Gilbert asks him critically. It takes a second for Matthew to realize he's not talking about paperwork. He giggles softly and hides his face deeper in the sweater.
"They're really comfy." He says going back to his work. Gilbert twists up his nose, then as if to try and see if Matthew is telling the truth, drapes himself over Matthew to snuggle into him. Matthew squeaks, freezing completely.
"Uh, Gil?" He asks. Gilbert makes a strange noise then sits next to him on his chair, squishing them together. He throws a cocky grin Matthew's way.
"You're right, they are cozy," He says. Matthew couldn't stop his laughter if he tried. He goes back to his work easier now.
"You looked nervous there for a second there birdie," Gilbert teases him, poking him in the side to make him squeak. Matthew gives him a half hearted glare.
"I thought you were judging me work," He admits.
"Oh I was totally doing that too, you're doing it wrong." Matthew jerks at the remark. He stares at Gilbert wide eyed, frightened that he has been doing his work wrong and could possibly be messing up his whole country. Gilbert can only keep a straight face for so long, busting into cackles at his panicked expression. Matthew huffs and pushes him off the chair.
"Kidding! Though I could help you?" Gilbert smirks from the floor. It's not much of a debate for Matthew to willingly give up half his work for the other to work on, only a little distracted by the closeness shared between them.
–
Alfred honks the horn on his car as Matthew unlocks his front door, throwing a careless wave over his shoulder knowing Alfred is too far gone to actually see it. When the door swings open he's greeted to the sound of music flittering gently through the house. He starts humming before he knows it, making his way to his bedroom to find Gilbert laying on the floor and covered by a blanket.
"What are you doing?" He says dropping down to lay beside him. Gilbert shrugs but sends a smirk his way,
"How did it gooo?" He prompts. Matthew smiles to his hands. This is one of the first times he went out without Gilbert beside him guiding him along.
"I stood up for myself again," He tells. Gilbert hollers and kicks to his knees to lean over Matthew with a wildly happy look on his face. Matthew giggles without bothering to cover up the sound
"See I knew you could do it," Gilbert says arrogantly like it was all his idea for Matthew to talk more. In truth it was. Ever since that first day, Gilbert stood by him, saying snotty comments and telling Matthew how to make himself more confident. The Wonder Woman stance might have been his favorite activity.
"Thank you for helping me," He says sweetly. Gilbert snorts, trying to make himself cooler than he is. He flops back down to rest his head by Matthew's nuzzling into him ever so slightly and kissing his cheek. Matthew laughs at the action, turning to kiss Gilbert where it counts.
The old country throws the blanket over them, cuddling his head into Matthew's chest to listen to his still beating heart. Matthew runs his finger's through the white hair, smiling easily. Never before would he have thought to find happiness like this. Never before would he have thought someone like Gilbert, loud and proud, would look at him like he puts the stars in the sky. It's a feeling he doesn't want to end.
–
Matthew doesn't know what to think of the music playing in his house. He's sure he didn't leave it on. He walks cautiously to his bedroom to see Gilbert by himself, moving slowly to the music with his eyes closed. He snorts before he can help it. Gilbert snaps his eyes open and stick his tongue out at him.
"You can dance," Matthew drops to his bed. Gilbert shrugs, rubbing the back of his head awkwardly at having been caught but smirking like he meant to.
"Yeah you know when you live a while," He cackles to himself mostly, dropping his hand that is now mostly see through, having faded just a bit more. Matthew gulps at the sight, wondering what it will be like to be alone again. suddenly the hand is in front of his face and Gilbert is smirking down at him.
"Dance with me," He says. Matthew shakes his head.
"Why not?" Gilbert wilts a little but keeps his hand out. Matthew rubs at his arms.
"i don't know how," He confesses. He winces when Gilbert start laughing loudly.
"Why didn't you say so? I'll teach you," He wiggles his hand a little, trying to get Matthew to take it without outright telling him to. Matthew peers up at him, his heart pounding in his chest. Slowly he does take the hand, practically being pulled up the second he holds on.
Gilbert cackles when Matthew crashes into him, holding both of them up with a smug look on his face. Matthew squeaks but puts his hands where they are directed to be.
"You can do this," Gilbert tells him gently, and for a wild second Matthew believes him. That thought goes out the window as Gilbert moves him just an inch and he almost falls to the ground. A few more fumbles later, and Matthew smiles at his feet, doing the right thing and following the right steps.
He lifts his head to smile at Gilbert only to find him already looking back with adoration on his face. Matthew looks back down to hide the blush he's hoping isn't really creeping up. Suddenly Gilbert sighs dramatically and pulls him in close for a crushing hug.
"Uhm," Matthew squeaks out. He's flustered clearly, but manages a small hug back that turns into gripping onto Gilbert and holding him tight. The soft music plays over them as Gilbert slowly releases him, but doesn't fully let go. Matthew has a hard time looking him in the eye.
"I wish I knew you sooner," Gilbert whispers, the quietest Matthew has ever heard him. He turns his head up to finally fully look at him only for Gilbert to kiss him quickly.
"You know, for reasons and stuff," He smiles smugly and Matthew knows he looks starstruck. Gilbert snickers and kisses him again, this time softer.
"Kind of sucks I didn't get to know you when I was alive."
–
Matthew singly lowly to himself in the kitchen, bopping his head to imaginary music as he makes breakfast for him and Gilbert. The french words roll off his tongue easily as breathing, the language settled inside him. He pokes the sausage with with a fork to get them to sizzle while his pancakes bake.
"Hey Mattie?" He makes a loud hum in response to the call of his name. He glances over at Gilbert entering the kitchen, then has to do a double take, dropping his fork with a flurry of movements. Gilbert smiles uneasily as half his body is now see through, barely there at all. Matthew backs up into the counter and covers his mouth with his hands, tears starting before he can think.
"Gilbert you-" His words are cut off by a quick sob. Gilbert walks over, though it's more like floating with his feet completely gone. He places a hand on Matthew's head, running it though his hair softly to lift his head up. His arm is basically gone but the feel of him is still there. Matthew can barely see through his tears and yet Gilbert is still smiling.
"Hey birdie don't cry," He says and Matthew cries harder. He lets himself be pulled into Gilbert's chest, the parts that aren't turning to see through.
"You can make it," He reassures, kissing Matthew's head sweetly and nuzzling into him. Matthew shakes his head against his chest, blinking hard to see again, see Gilbert before he completely fades.
"Not without you," His voice is hoarse already. He looks up and his heart pounds at the gentle smile on Gilbert's face. The fading country kisses him one last time and holds him tight. Matthew throws his arms around his shoulders, clinging to the last bit of the first person to ever seen him. He cries loudly no longer caring. His sobs come harder when he can no longer feel Gilbert's arms around him.
He crumples to the ground when there is no longer anyone to hold him up. He curls into himself, his thoughts utterly gone, just muttering over and over for only him to hear.
"Not without you, not without you."
–
"YO Mattie!" Matthew has just enough time to brace himself before Mathias jumps on him from behind, slinging an arm over his shoulder and laughing right in his ear.
"You joining us for hockey later yeah? I invited Russia and Hungary too and they are pumped! You're coming yeah?" He says brightly, nearly shouting in Matthew's face. He laughs simply and manages to pry the other off him without being offensive.
"Of course. I have to run home though, so I might be a bit late," He takes a few steps back to his car and Mathias laughs loudly again.
"We'll wait! Hurry up!" And the Dane is running off to join the others. Matthew smiles at them and goes to his car, slipping inside and started his drive home. He got a call from his minister just an hour ago telling him to hurry back and that there's been an important new development in the country. So that's what he's doing.
He eyes the little bird charm in his car on the road home, then the sweater on the passenger seat with a small little chick sewn into it. It's been a few years since Gilbert finally faded. The memory still puts a lump in Matthew's throat but he has been doing better, he has been making it, even though he still wishes Gilbert was there with him. He takes a deep breath and wipes at his eyes with the back of his hand. He needs to remember to keep his head up, if only for his own sake.
He pulls up to where the minister told him to meet, getting out of his car with a twist in his expression to show his confusion. The minster shakes his hand as he approaches in a polite way then guides him through a few trees.
"As you know the people have been in an unrest," The minster says. Matthew nods his head, wondering just where this is going.
"Well it seems it has finally hit a breaking point," The official leads him over to a designated fence, and immediately in passing Mathew can feel the shift, something about this land that is so obviously attached to him, is not his. He shakes his head to rid himself of the feeling only to look up and spot a person sitting in the middle of a large field, smirking at him.
"Welcome to New Prussia," The minister says. Matthew is frozen in his spot, staring at the new country in the field. He can sense their lasting energy, can feel they way they are alive. He covers his mouth with a hand, choking back a noise. Finally the person stands and walks over to him with his hands in his pockets, still as smug as ever.
"I told you, you could make it," He says. Matthew's eyes well up in tears and he throws himself at Gilbert, holding him tightly and mumbling incoherent french into his chest. Gilbert snickers and swings him back and forth happily, feeling real as ever underneath Matthew's fingertips. He pulls back to brush Matthew's hair out of his face. Matthew can't find the words, just staring up at him with the brightest smile. Gilbert snorts then leans to kiss him sweetly.
"You could have done it," He muses. Matthew pushes him playfully, then pulls him back for another tight hug.
"But it wouldn't have been as fun," He manages to say. Gilbert laughs loudly, positioning Matthew properly to dance them around the small field. They fumble once or twice having been out of practice, but it doesn't hinder the smiles on both their faces.
"It's so nice to be able to actually hold you," Gilbert squishes him closer. Matthew snorts to that, kissing him gently.
"It's nice to see you whole," He counters. Gilbert sputters out into a loud laugh, turning a few more heads now that people can actually see and hear him. Matthew cares nothing for their odd looks. The only thing he cares about is kissing Gilbert again and listening to him laugh in a real and living way.
AN: This story is based off the art works done by mr-reblogbutton over on tumblr. Also my heart hurts