The Midnight Adventures Of The One And Only Super Special Sirius Something Black.

Disclaimer: We own nothing! (Not even the underwear we are wearing).

And we support NO gayness!

Chapter One: I kissed a squirrel!

'I kissed a squirrel, and I liked it, taste of her acorn chap stick'

A loud obnoxious voice rung out through the empty halls of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry.

'It felt so right, it felt so wrong'

Sirius Black skipped through the halls singing gaily, he looped his arm through that of a suit of armor's.

A loud scratching/grinding sound echoed through the halls as he dragged it against the stone floor.

All the while screeching out the lyrics to the song, he was "singing".

McGonagall sat behind her wood desk, grading papers.

The large Grandfather clock struck twelve, making her jump slightly.

She chuckled lightly at her own stupidness there was nothing or no one awake at this time of night, other then the ghosts that roamed the halls.

'Don't mean I'm in love tonight…I kissed a Squirrel just to try it, hope my Marauders don't mind it'

McGonagall jumped falling off her chair.

'Merlin's underpants what was that?'

She whipped out her wand, getting up off the floor, flinging the doors open.

She would find this intruder and show him her wrath. (AN: Muhaha McGonagall is finally aloud to show her evil side)

'I kissed a squirrel…Blast I don't know the rest of it' Sirius muttered almost walking right past our favourite professor, 'Why hello Mini, how are you this lovely evening? Or is it morning?'

McGonagall stared at him mouth hanging wide open.

'Sirius PauseSomething Black, what are you doing awake?' McGonagall asked regaining her composure.

'Why Mini it's a horrible story!' Fake tears built up in his gray eyes, 'You see I have this illness that keeps me from sleeping, It's utter agony'

'More then you know' McGonagall muttered under her breath.

'What's it called again? A-? A-something…umm…Asomia? No that's not it! That reminds me of a story! Wanna hear it?'

'Not particularly'

'Too bad! Well anyway, I was walking up to my dorm and just when I opened my door I was…duhduhduh…ATTACKED!'

'By what?' McGonagall asked in a flat tone, deciding to humour him.

'I dunno! Well anyway…I fell unconscious and when I awoke I was strapped to my bed with chains-'

'WITH WHAT?'

'With chains, stop interrupting! Anyway I awoke with one of Peter's dirty disgusting neon orange socks shoved in my mouth…it was the most breathtaking experiment of my life'

McGonagall looked at him oddly for a moment, 'you mean experience, don't you'

'Oh right that's the word!'

Sirius started humming loudly, pushing past McGonagall.

'Mister Black please be quiet'

'Oh sorry Mini, I didn't realize I was interrupting your beauty sleep'

'W- wha-?'

'Well good night professor' Sirius started to skip off.

'Mister Black, where do you think you're going?'

'To my dorm!' He started to skip off again, making it halfway down the hall before he heard 'Mini' yell out to him.

'You have a detention mister Black'

'Right-o Professor' He replied waving over his shoulder to her.

Prongs(Author): Hehe...well that's the first chapter all done and wrapped up in nice shiny Sponge-Bob Square Pants wrapping paper, and shipped off to...umm? Madagascar to visit Matt! haha.

Moona(Co-Author): no comment... no wait i do have one REVIEW!!

Prongs: Or face the wrath of the BUNNY!

Wormtail(Co-Co- Author): Review and please point out all the horrible mistakes...and burst Prongs and Moona's pretty purple bubbles...thankyou.