It didn't help that the walls of his house were plastered with photographs taken on their honeymoon, or at Aaron's piano recietals. But he guessed it really didn't matter what his house looked like anymore, he didn't have a family - Aaron was long gone now, so was Aaron's mother - he didn't have a job - they didn't need a doctor with hands as unsteady as his own. He didn't need to keep up appearances.
But he wasn't sure he wanted to be continually reminded of what he had lost.
Lost, no.
A reminder of what was taken from him.
He didn't want to think about their final night on the island together, after they'd saved Claire and reunited Sun and Jin, after she'd told him they were going to leave on Widmore's sub. But he did. He didn't need to hear Locke's lasting words "I can't let you leave... this is your destiny... you have what it takes" and he didn't need to watch himself walk away, dismissing the old mans words. He didn't -But he replayed it in his mind over and over and over and...
over again.
He wasn't the one who paid for their mistakes, Locke thought the only way to get him to stay was to use her. And so he did. And Jack wept over her body, and smashed the mirrors and burnt the submarine but he didn't escape it.
Couldn't escape it.
So now he rejected his mother. "This is insane, Jack, your plane never crashed.." He rejected his therapist and he rejected the people that were supposed to be his friends "'I'm sorry, I don't know you, brother."
So he plastered his walls with photographs of the woman he couldn't have. He glued her face over Sarah's as he hung their wedding photo's, and tacked pictures of Aaron - bright blue eyes, dark brown hair - against his wooden doors.