My father always used to give me good advice. It was mostly about money, but there was one other thing that he told me. He repeated it every day. "Son, in this world, there are weak people, and strong people. People will always try to hurt you, to make you weak. You don't want to be weak. Son, you must show people that you have power. Make the rest of them weak. Happiness is also for the weak. You don't need to be happy. You just need to be strong."
My mother was his undoing. He trusted her, made her happy. They made each other happy. When she left him, he committed suicide. It reinforced his lessons: "Don't trust, don't let people see your weakness, don't need anybody." I've lived my life by his creed, struck people with whips of my power. If only they knew that it made them stronger.
My father also told me that there were two things I could never have enough of, and one thing I could never have. "Son, money and power are abundant in this world. You need them. But good people are scarce. Don't go looking for them, or you'll get tricked. You'll get hurt."
I've found good people, one in particular. Looking at her, I want to change. She's had so much pain in her life, so happiness couldn't make her weaker, could it? But if I let her in, and she left… I couldn't bear it. I loved my father, and hated him. And now I've turned into him. Love is the most dangerous emotion.
I've started to doubt my father…despair makes you weak, so wouldn't happiness make you stronger? But it's too late. She'll never trust me, even if I let her in. Now I realize my mistake. It's not happiness that will destroy you…it's apathy. But it's too late to go back. I must stay and be destroyed slowly, watching the people I now know to be strong hate me. I let myself be destroyed. It's easier than making a new start.