Written For:
Gift fic to Liza (Homeless!Sirius and Squib!Sirius)(For Monthly one-shot Exchange on HPFC)
Friends Competition: TOW The Vows
Prompt - Write about someone struggling to admit their feelings.
Are You Crazy Enough to Do It Challenge
Prompt - 339. (quote) Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future, concentrate the mind on the present moment. - Buddha
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Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future, concentrate the mind on the present moment. - Buddha
A Serendipitous Meeting
Eighteen-year old Sirius wandered into a little village. It wasn't the first village he had been in, and at first glance, it looked like every other village he had ever seen. For some reason, though, he felt drawn to it. He didn't know why.
He began scoping out the marketplace, looking for easy targets for a little thievery. He didn't like stealing, but he did what he had to do in order to survive. He was sure anyone in his position would do the same thing.
He stopped when a laughing family of four—two parents and two brothers—passed by him. It made him think about his own brother that he hadn't seen since he was eight. Regulus had shown early signs of magic, but Sirius had never shown any, and everyone in the magical world knew what that mean.
Squib.
It was such an ugly word with such a negative connotation. His parents didn't hesitate before they abandoned him in the Muggle world at a children's home. Sirius stayed only as long as he had to, but he ran away at sixteen, unable to put up with it any longer.
Ever since then, he had been on his own, living on the street. It was tough, but it was better than the alternative. He shuddered as he remembered the different types of abuse he suffered. He might be hungry and thirsty sometimes now, but at least he was free.
Still, he wondered how Regulus was doing. He wondered if Regulus even remembered him. Sirius sighed.
He hated living in the past. It would never bring him peace to think about what might have been if he only had magic. He didn't like dreaming of the future either, though, because when you didn't have a home, a future wasn't always certain. Many things could happen—disease, hunger, violence—it was better to just live in the present and hope for the best.
Sirius started walking around and continued gazing at all of the vendors. He immediately picked out the ones that would be easier targets.
A wonderful scent filled the air when he passed a bakery, and he looked in. There were only a couple of customers inside and a fresh baked cake sat on top of the counter. There was no one behind it either. If he was quick enough, he could walk in as if he was going to buy something, grab the cake, and run. He should be far enough gone before the customers could alert the worker.
He took a deep breath and nonchalantly strolled in. He looked at the cases as if he was trying to figure out what to buy. He inched his way towards the cake, still keeping up the charade of looking at all of the delights for sale. When he was close enough, he picked up the cake and ran.
There were shouts behind him, but he kept running. He kept his head down low and took some turns, hoping to throw off anyone that was pursuing him.
When he thought he was far enough away, he sat down in a heap against the building. He grabbed a chunk of the cake and took a gigantic bite. He closed his eyes and savored the sweet chocolate taste. He couldn't remember the last time he had something so delicious. It was like fluffy heaven in his mouth.
"You stole that," a voice stated accusingly.
Sirius' eyes opened, and he stared flummoxed in to the most beautiful amber eyes he had ever seen. He vaguely recognized the boy from the bakery and cursed himself for getting careless. He should have farther away.
There was no use denying what was obviously the truth. "Yeah, I did."
"Don't you have money?"
Sirius shook his head.
The boy tilted his head. "Why not get a job?"
"I don't know how to."
"Won't your parents help you?"
Sirius felt pain constrict in his chest. Normal people had parents that would help, but Sirius had never been normal. "I haven't seen them since I was eight."
The boy's eyes widened. "Oh, I'm sorry. Did they die?"
"I wish," he bitterly remarked. At the boy's gasp of surprise, Sirius continued, "That would have been easier. At least I would have known they hadn't chosen to leave me. They got rid of me because I wasn't good enough for the family."
"I'm sorry," the boy whispered. "I'm Remus Lupin. What's your name?"
"Sirius Black."
Remus gasped again. "I knew some Blacks in school. I wonder if there's a relation."
"Doubt it."
"Probably right. Went to a boarding school in Scotland, and I'm sure Black is a very popular surname."
Sirius blinked. Hogwarts was in Scotland. Could it be? What were the chances of him meeting a wizard in such an out-of-the-way village. Still, he had to know. "Did you know a Regulus Black?"
"He was a year behind me," Remus said and sat down next to him.
Sirius bit his bottom lip. "Did he seem okay?"
Remus nodded.
"He's my brother."
Remus looked confused. "If your parents kept him, why did they..." He trailed off, not wanting to say 'abandon you.'
"I'm a squib, and in a lot of Pure-blood families, that's considered an embarrassment, and they're not worthy of being a part of the family."
"That's terrible, but I've met some of your relatives, so I can believe they think like that. Only one seemed to be pretty nice. Andromeda."
Sirius smiled. "She was always my favorite."
Remus stared at him. "I'm sorry you got such a lousy family. You reminded me how lucky I am."
"Really?"
Remus nodded. "Some families might have gotten rid of me when..."
"When?" Sirius prodded, curious.
Remus looked down at his lap. "When I was bitten by a werewolf, but my mum and dad stuck by me and defended me against everyone who said I was nothing more than a monster. I'm not sure if I would have been strong enough to survive without them like you did."
"You'd be amazed with what you can do when you have to."
"Remus?" a female voice called.
Remus stood up. "Mum, over here."
Sirius stood up as well and tried to hide the cake behind him. There was no reason to make a lousy first impression, and he didn't know why he cared about what Remus' mum thought of him.
"There you are, Sweetie. Oh, who's this?" a skinny woman with pale skin, brown hair, and brown eyes asked.
"Mum, this is my new friend, Sirius. Sirius, this is my mum, Hope Lupin."
Sirius nodded his head. "Nice to meet you, Mrs. Lupin."
Remus grabbed Sirius' arm. "Mum, he knows about Hogwarts. He comes from a wizarding family."
"Really?" Hope asked.
Remus looked at Sirius. "My mum is actually a Muggle, but when she learned about magic from my dad, she took it really well. Or, at least that's what my parents always told me."
Sirius silently nodded.
Remus looked back at his mum. "Mum, can Sirius come over for lunch?"
"I don't see why not."
Sirius shook his head. "You don't have to, M'am."
"I want to. Any friend of Remus' is more than welcome at the house. Come along, boys. And Sirius, maybe we should make a stop at the bakery so you can apologize."
Sirius ducked his head guiltily."
"Mum—" Remus began, but Hope held up her hand, stopping him.
"I'm not judging. I'm sure he has his reasons, but apologizing is the right thing to do. Let's go."
The boys meekly followed Hope. She might have been small, but she was a force to be reckoned with.
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That night, after Hope and Lyall invited Sirius to spend the night, the two boys sat on top of Remus' bed.
"You really are lucky to have them," Sirius said.
"I know. I'm going to miss them."
Sirius blinked. "Why would you have to miss them?"
"There's a war brewing in the wizarding world, and I'm going to be fighting in it. I'm here to spend some time with my parents before I go, but I won't be visiting them until it's over because I'm afraid I'll lead the enemy to them. They have a better chance at surviving if I stay away."
"I'm sorry. Do they know?"
"My dad knows, but we're trying to keep my mum in the dark so we don't worry her. She knows something is wrong, but she doesn't know what it is."
"Will I get to see you again?"
"I talked to my dad, and he's agreed that you can stay here if you want. He'll help you get a job and everything. And that way, I know my parents won't be alone, and they'll have someone to help them around the house as they get older. And also, when the war is over and I come see them, I'll be able to see you as well."
"I'll feel like I'm taking advantage of your parents' generosity."
"You're not because you'll be working and earning your own money, and you'll be helping them with chores I usually help them with. And I'll feel better knowing they have someone younger around."
Sirius nodded his agreement. He definitely wouldn't mind spending more time with the best parents in the whole world. And an added bonus was he'd get to see Remus again.
Remus was there for another week, and the boys grew closer and closer. Sirius had never experienced this kind of emotion before, but he was pretty sure it was love.
When Remus looked into his eyes, Sirius thought he saw identical emotion in amber eyes, but he couldn't be sure. And before the werewolf left, neither of them had confessed their feelings.
Maybe it was for the best, though. Remus had no idea when, or even if, he would be back. Maybe they shouldn't cling onto what might be between them until they could actually do something about it.
There was no reason to have false hope, right?
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Sirius was weeding the front yard when he heard footsteps on the gravel. He looked up and gasped at the sight of an older Remus Lupin. "Wow."
Remus' eyes were haunted. "It's been a long three years."
"Your war is over?" Sirius asked hopefully.
Remus nodded. "My best friends are dead, though. And there son is an orphan, sent to live with a magic-hating aunt and uncle. I'm not allowed to become his guardian because I'm a werewolf and considered unsafe. But he's safe with people who hate his very existence? How is that fair?" Remus choked out, his grief palpable.
Sirius' heart clenched. "There has to be a way to fight it."
"I don't know," Remus murmured.
Sirius walked to him and wrapped his arms around Remus. "I'm so glad to see you. I've missed you."
Remus nuzzled his nose into Sirius' neck. "I've missed you, too." He leaned back. "You were right, though. I'm going to fight it. Harry should be with me, and I'm not going to rest until the Ministry sees it my way.
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Sirius and Remus smiled at a three-year old Harry who was happily playing with a stuffed dog.
"I can't believe I finally won guardianship," Remus murmured.
Sirius squeezed his hand. "You deserve it. Harry looks like he's going to be a very happy kid."
Remus finally tore his gaze away from the toddler to look at Sirius, a man who had become his biggest support as he fought the Ministry. "I couldn't have done it without you. Thank you."
Sirius shrugged. "It's the least I could do for the man who taught me what family is really supposed to be like."
Remus looked at Harry once again. "I wish James and Lily got to meet you. They would have liked you. I can just imagine you and James creating havoc wherever you went."
"I wish I met them, too. They sound like they were amazing people."
"They were." Remus rested his head against Sirius' shoulder. "Thank you for being with me."
"Thank you for loving me," Sirius returned.
"I couldn't imagine it any other way."
Fin
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(word count: 2,028)